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T O P I C R E V I E Waileene9919 years ago was the last time I saw and spoke to my first love, Jon. I have tried so many times, more than Id like to admit, to keep the lines of communication open, however I failed in all my attempts. I have never loved anyone nor have I ever been loved by anyone the way I was by him. Hes the only person I have ever given all my heart to. I just don't understand why , after so long, do these feelings still arise? Why do I still have hope? Why am I always pulled in his direction? Social media definitely makes it that much harder. Why doesn't he block me if he doesn't want to speak to me? I am just done being stuck here. No matter what relationship I am in it always comes back to him. Why? all help is appreciated FaithThe First Cut is the Deepest http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aBccr-aLu4I RandallWelcome!dreamscomeslowhonestly 19 years is a long time and holding on is most likely a symptom of other personal issues... continue the work that needs to be done to keep a place for him in your heart but no where else, not in your reality, not in your mouth(words! haha that sounded dirty..), not in your communication with friends, not in social media, in your heart and off your lips. You cannot force someone to love you. You cannot change someones desire levels for you. There will come a time and you know what.. maybe that time is here and has been here for some time now.... If it comes LET IT ... even though the answers have been there all along... you cannot see something until your eyes are ready. This is a great, supportive online community.. Be gentle on yourself.. I hope that helps.RandallYeah, 19 is very long.aileene99Thank you for your response ) I have moved on there's just always that tiny pull in his direction every once in a while and it drives me crazy. I don't want to be in a relationship with him, he was just such an important person in my life and I would've liked to at the least had closure and been friends by now. Thanks again )))RandallThat's more than fair.RandallWishing you closure.RandallAnd friendship.RandallBe patient.RandallHe might come around.aileene99I doubt it it. I'm learning to just let it all go ... I've tried a lot .. Randall
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