posted February 10, 2006 04:13 PM              

in total distress
needy
troubled
helpless
depressed
coping with substance abuse
married and struggling or in trouble with the marriage

I merely ask this because I had what can only be described as an epiphany yesterday. In an uncharacteristically sweet flirtatious email to me(it was a response to a emergency science question which I ribbed him for not getting back to me on) he in essence asked if he missed helping a damsel in distress...
And yes I was uncharacteristically in a distress mode at the time....

It is an odd odd thing because the few Pisces I know well seem invariably hooked up in serious distress situations. Yet, my Pisces friends also seem in desperate need of strong partners who are reasonably happy and optimistic...

Thoughts?

posted February 10, 2006 04:39 PM              

I am a pisces, LOTS of water in my chart, and I invariably find myself attracting those who NEED something. But it suits me fine, until I get so absorbed in their emotional hang-ups that I cannot focus on my own life. This is a typical piscean problem. We tend to meld so well with others that we often lose ourselves. This is the never ending struggle for us fish: To find someone that has a strong sense of self and encourages us to do the same, but at the same times allows us to escape to our fantasy, crisis prone world while holding firming onto our feet.

It's all about balance..

Pisces definately have a crisis magnet attached to their forheads, myself included. But once a pisces finds his/her niche within a safe relationship with a strong person, the desire to FIX and attract distress diminishes, and the desire to nurture and grow kicks in.

Good luck with your friend. Hope everything works out for him!

posted February 10, 2006 04:57 PM              

'But once a pisces finds his/her niche within a safe relationship with a strong person, the desire to FIX and attract distress diminishes, and the desire to nurture and grow kicks in.'

I liked this and I hope it to be true!!
(Pis influenced friends who seem to attract depressed sorts!)

posted February 10, 2006 05:11 PM              

As a pisces myself, I've had one significant relationship (4 yrs) with an alcoholic (definite "rescuer/fixer" stuff going on in that one ... and another shorter-term relationship (6 mos) with a guy who was bipolar (though, on meds, so ... dunno what he would have been like without medication). Both of these guys were rather intense.

Even still, though my current relationship isn't characterized by the traits original poster listed, my boyfriend is a pretty intense, passionate-sort of guy ... it isn't a "needy" relationship ... but, he is a brooding-artistic type, and there's a lot of intensity in his passions.

I'd agree with ... << But once a pisces finds his/her niche within a safe relationship with a strong person, the desire to FIX and attract distress diminishes, and the desire to nurture and grow kicks in. >> ... only, i'd say that that relationship is the relationship a Pisces has with him/herself, first and foremost.

posted February 10, 2006 05:23 PM            

I nuture and inspire and uplift not bc I feel I have to but bc that is who I am. I guess this alll boils down to us attracting like minded ppl or something. But yes once you are evolved the attraction is different..

posted February 11, 2006 03:50 AM              

I had not many instances of serious distress situations where I could help others. Still there is always a longing (thoughts) to give our self to others needs.

Yeah, Pisces man can love hard and sometimes be obsessive. Best thing in such cases is to be very open on such issues, as Pisceans themselves would feel bad finding that they are being obsessive or even possessive causing hurt to other person. Also with their inner growth & life’s experience they might become better than the obsessive FIRST love.
For me, giving commitment to a relationship takes time. I need lot of assurance & commitment from other person (that they too are involved). I expect other person (including myself) to be as committed as one can be. However in situations where there are other factors involved (like ethics) then it is something of which I am not sure how I would respond. Being a Piscean I could easily go with the flow. At the same I would be fighting my own ideals, along with thoughts related to hurt feelings which might be caused to other people involved/getting affected by me going for the relationship.
Once the commitment is given, there is no looking back and it is like trying to be as idealistic as I need to be.

posted February 11, 2006 08:25 AM              

... I wanted to know can they love a woman who is in essence, whole, healthy, and happy, warm, giving, and confident (not whiny or ****** off, insecure, tramatized, addicted, unavailable...)

Thanks Mama, Villy et al

posted February 11, 2006 12:59 PM              

Just a correction to my earlier post with some elaboration, I wrote “Once the commitment is given, there is no looking back and it is like trying to be as idealistic as I need to be.” However this might be only true of normal relations. For other relations (so called unethical/odd ones) I am not very sure.
If I think of my current state, I always think that I would be non-committal if my relation reaches to such a serious state of commitments. We might even go for it half heartedly with constant inner fight. However I am not sure how I would behave, if such a situation takes place in reality.
Also it is for sure that the reason for non-committal or trying to run away from the relation, is not due to fear of social stigma, however their inner fight against there own ideals. In such matters, where social stigma is involved, Pisces might even show lot of courage and they might take the path where others may not think of treading. I guess the more the neediness of other person the greater or faster the commitment might come in, as they might put others need first and if need be sacrifice their own ideals.

posted February 11, 2006 04:40 PM              

To me a "whole" person is one who, despite the challenges and trials of a life well lived (and one cannot live well without some degree of sadness or tragedy)will find a way to rise above. To me being whole is not escaping from sadness, or introspection but having the internal resources to stare crises in the face and to manage. Perhaps not brilliantly and certainly not perfectly but with a bit of poise and courage.

posted February 12, 2006 03:36 AM              

Yes, I think a strong person might surely attract a Pisces. The first facet described earlier, where in their own need of such strong people in their life, would be a factor. Pisces, being in contact with a strong person, would soon realize that the strong person’s influence on his life is benefiting him and making him grow. Thus the attraction would be much stronger. In fact I think on couple of occasions my initial attractions to 2 gals (including the recent colleague) were because I found them to be a strong person. If the strong person tries to help the Pisces grow, it is a significant factor to kick-start the attraction. Maybe after a period of time of such attraction, I think, Pisces might try to look for vulnerabilities in other person. So that he could in turn help the other person (like mutual reciprocation - its like a feeling of both becoming whole when they are together)

posted February 12, 2006 05:55 PM              

In my personal case. No. One of my less forgiving friends says I get them when they are weak and vulnerable.

But I think he gets what I am actually doing now. Its not deliberate or with any ulterior motive.

I just find birds with broken wings or too scared to fly grab my attention more.

posted February 12, 2006 08:46 PM              

Pisces make great psychologists, they like to help people because nurturing is a two way street, we feel good when we give, makes us feel strong, important, remembered, valued.

You will find Pisces bartenders, Pisces psychologists, publishers, they do like women to be different, but caring, nurturing, and nice, basically someone to bring home to Mom, but sexy.

My Pisces friend does pick women who run away, but lately he has been stabilizing now that he bought a house and got a better job. Now he is looking for women who are in his area and don't leave, at least.

It helps if you have an accent, are mysterious, quirky, funny, know a lot of people, have chocolate.

posted February 13, 2006 12:09 AM            

Pis/Scorp-Rising

Otherwise Ill be on my own recharging in my alternate universe

posted February 14, 2006 01:56 PM              

LOL. All of the above...but oh man the protection thing, I have to address that.

In my experience, Pisces protection is a very unique form of bodyguarding. Here comes this person who seems very dreamy and a bit out of it; yet occasionally they exert some kind of powerful domain over another.

It is difficult to explain, but I see and feel this intensely with my father and with Doc, both Pisces. This is particularly uncanny for a person like me. I am extremely self contained and emotionally and physically self-sufficent. For anyone to make me feel that I need protection much less provide it, well, it is startling to say the least. It can also be dizzyingly comforting, though a bit scary too and sometimes even make me wash to buck it off.

posted October 16, 2011 10:15 PM            

You know what? I HAVE wondered about that, because the Piscean men I've known seem to not really be interested in women that aren't broken or damaged goods in some way. It's like they need someone to feel sorry for and 'save'.