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Author Topic:   The unforgettable one...
running_bull
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Posts: 275
From: the desert, usa
Registered: Nov 2004

posted July 05, 2005 04:43 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for running_bull     Edit/Delete Message
Someone posted a question not long ago about about how to forget the unforgettable. Well in a few day after Saturn moves out of Cancer (I've been going through my Saturn return), it will be six months since my ex-boyfriend and I broke up. I have had dates and a short lived relationship in the past six months, but my ex stays on my mind.
His Virgo Sun, Pisces Moon, and Capricorn Ascendant complimented my Taurus Sun, Leo Moon, and Cancer Ascendant, like no other. This made it difficult to initially move on and I admit to still thinking about him at least once everyday, which is not personally productive.

Anyway, I've tried to fight it and haven't been able to get past missing him. It's really not fair to myself or others in my life to linger over a lost love. Especially since I believe he doesn't miss me and I know he has moved on to someone else. So I have decided, for my best interest, to think of him as someone I will probably love and miss for a long time. But none the less, he is someone who has chosen to not be in my life.

In fairness and respect to myself any future loves, I am not going to put effort into not thinking about him or actively trying to forget everything about him. It's too much effort.

Instead, I am thankful for the good he brought to my life and grateful that I learned from everything else like. He will cross my mind and then the thought will pass.
I figure sooner or later he will wander through my thoughts like an old friend might - in passing.

I'm thinking in answer to the question of how to forget an unforgettable person or how we get over the person we still love and have/had strong connections with, is time... in time they fade. Become more distant and less about/connected to the person we are currently. Good luck to all us lovelorn, stay strong.

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Mama Mia
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posted July 05, 2005 12:28 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Mama Mia     Edit/Delete Message
WOW!!!! this is so strange that you are going through this I feel the exact same way and it has been about 6 mnths for me too...

Good Luck...

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running_bull
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Posts: 275
From: the desert, usa
Registered: Nov 2004

posted July 05, 2005 01:36 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for running_bull     Edit/Delete Message
Thanks Good luck to you also.
Many people seem to be going through some sort of heartache. I just think its worse for me because Virgo's are cute and needy... the achilles heel of my Taurus Sun and Cancer Ascendant.

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BlueTopaz124
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Posts: 367
From: Portland, OR
Registered: Jan 2004

posted July 05, 2005 02:20 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for BlueTopaz124     Edit/Delete Message
I'm feeling the same way right now. It does get easier, but the way I look at it is the same...I'm grateful for the experience, the chance to love, he was one of the great loves of my life. I agree, though, that the difficult part is moving on and still missing them - time does help, but in the meantime there is so much empty space. (yes, I know, there are other non-romantic people in my life to love, but NOT the same) The longing is still there. Right now, kind of feel the same way, though, it's not fair to anyone else to get involved, partly because the desire and spark, excitement about someone isn't there. It will be, eventually, I know, but I don't feel all that enthusiastic about someone new right now.

kisses for all of us
Laura

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SecretGardenAgain
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posted July 05, 2005 02:21 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for SecretGardenAgain     Edit/Delete Message
running bull,

i am impressed with your mature take on things. Unfortunately the heart and mind dont always work together do they, in some cases they are working at opposites and cause a lot of grief. But I am hopeful that you will get over this guy and, in time, find something to cherish that is much better than him

I have been through a similar period in my life with a Leo, i wasted two years of my life pining after him, when he was not interested. Now I think, why did I waste two years of my fun teenage life, I made my own life hell, and I wish I had been as wise as you are with this guy

I also know my virgo ex is not over me in the least bit and calls me at the strangest times, crying and the like. I feel bad for him, but I try to tell him something akin to what you're saying here. Everything happens for the best, if we choose to take the lessons and move forward

Now with the recent Aqua, he has shaken my world too, and I feel a strange incompleteness without him loving me, even though I have chosen to start seeing the Aries. Even when you move past, sometimes even when you love again, a certain someone from the past is just too powerful to be forgotten

Ever!

Love
SG

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BlueTopaz124
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From: Portland, OR
Registered: Jan 2004

posted July 05, 2005 02:49 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for BlueTopaz124     Edit/Delete Message
SG...wise words: If we choose to take the lesson and move forward.

I feel that giving yourself enough time (respecting your own feelings and knowing if you are/are not ready), but also being firm with yourself about moving on.

Some people in our lives are magical and hold our hearts in such a way that we will never forget. Hard to explain just exactly what it is about them. Is probably why it's so hard to let go of these individuals. Mine was an Aqua tooo.


kisses,
Laura

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Mama Mia
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posted July 05, 2005 03:37 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Mama Mia     Edit/Delete Message
Oh it is definetly about getting the lesson and being able to move forward and have faith in knowing that you will love again. Man those Aquas are strong especially if you has some aspecets in you alls charts that are strong like my Aqua sun and I had Aqua moon and merc,venus,and Asc the attraction was like a steel to a magnet. But I went through this with another Aqua and we had a double Whammy Im a Pisces sun with Aqua moon he was Aqua Sun with Pisces moon. I got over that and I am destined to to get over this. when that time comes you will know I feel it slowly but surely happening now. And the fact that Saturn is moving out the way cause his Black A$$ has been sitting in my 5th house of true love for 2 years now is making things oh so much sweeter...

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BlueTopaz124
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Posts: 367
From: Portland, OR
Registered: Jan 2004

posted July 05, 2005 04:20 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for BlueTopaz124     Edit/Delete Message
MM...wow, those are some aspects, with both of the men you were involved with. Especially since you both have conjunct moons!!! How did you ever get over that one?

My moon is conjunct with his sun, plus we have a few other sextiles & trines. Not to mention the squares that create the tension.


I was involved with a Scorpio that I thought I would never get over (I look back on that relationship - it wasn't quite so reciprocal as the one with the Aquarius), but I will tell you - this Aquarius man - he affected me in a way that no man had ever, he got into my heart very deeply. This one we both felt the same about each other and the chemistry - well I could write a book about that!

I've met probably 4 Aqua men since meeting the one I'm getting over, and I will tell you, I'm sure they're special in their own way, but when you're in love with someone, nothing can take your head or heart away from them until you're ready. These men pale in comparison.

It sounds as though there is a Virgo guy who you met recently - how are you with that guy MM?

kisses,
Laura

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Mama Mia
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Registered: Jun 2005

posted July 05, 2005 05:00 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Mama Mia     Edit/Delete Message
Blue: Isn't that some strong aspects to have with another person. I would have thought surely one of these would have ended up in marriage goood aspects for marriage both of them...

Any way the relatioship with the Aqua Pisces moon guy it took me awhile to get over him it was real hard too. He was so afraid of the way he was feeling and he had no control over his feeling after so long and that terrified him. Plus he was a control freak and I cannot never be controlled just not that type of gal.. I cried alot lost alot of weight it was definelty a serious process. My mom told me one time Baby next year this time you will be trying to see what you ever saw in him and as sure as I sit here that is how I felt a year later if it took that long..BUT we remained friends which was good and about two years after the relationship ended he was trying to get me back.. I was like nope it is over especially since he was so adiment on ending it in the first place and he knew how hurt I was...after it was over I use to could read his mind seemed like cause he was thnking all the time I messed up.. We both had Aqua in Merc too..

The last Aqua it has been hard for me with him too,the hurtful part is he does not speak to me..When we broke up I said somethings to him that was so hurtful I know now but he hurt me first by not being totally honest(another women) and I told him NO we cannot be friends and as far as I am concerned we never met. Well you know if you hurt an Aqua they will shut down on you so that you cannot do it again. It hurt him so bc he made a special effort to remain friends (of course he did) Whatever. I was hurt though I did not mean it. After about a month in ahalf after we broke up I tried to rectify things but he wont respond at all. Although I knew that he still had feelings for me I could tell the way I would catch him looking at me in the gym again we both have Aqua in Merc and to pick up on his feelings was not hard and vise versa..

Mr Virgo he just disappeared,only saw him in the gym always chit chatted and I know that he was attracted to me and I him,but it was so confusing for me since my aqua was there in the gym too with us I did not want to see mr. Virgo or atleast let the Aqua know that just incase we got back together so I was acting so confused and detatched sometimes he was not quite for sure how I was feeling. So finally when I decided to talk to Mr. Virgo I never saw him again. We are out of the gym for the summer but he had stop coming like a month b4 we were out. I was so angry I felt like I snoozed on that.. Maybe I will bump into him oneday again...

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BlueTopaz124
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Posts: 367
From: Portland, OR
Registered: Jan 2004

posted July 05, 2005 05:26 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for BlueTopaz124     Edit/Delete Message
MM...It's tough, sometimes with men, if you hurt them (and someone please come along and correct me if I'm wrong), they will hold on and never forgive. Especially with an Aquarius man - they aren't so connected with their feelings (well, they are, but will rarely reveal what they are truly feeling) and being a fixed sign, believe mightily in their actions and won't change, no matter how they feel about you. Being so good at concealing how they really feel, one never knows if there is a soft spot for you in there still. sigh.

I was also hurt by the Aqua guy, and the sad thing, is he justifies it by saying "well, this is how I am", not for one second considering that I am an individual with feelings and that maybe he needs to change his actions a little if he's hurting another human being, especially me, someone he had professed to love. So, I guess with them, when they have their mind set, it's set.

I'm a mutable sign (so are you), plus being a woman, and I'm softer. I might be impulsive and get angry, but I know what I'm doing and will change how I feel later. It doesn't take me long. I am never so fixed in my ways that I'm not willing to change. Especially if I love someone, family, friend, whomever it is.

I'm the same way as you, though - if another Aquarius man comes along and captures my heart, I would do it all again.

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Mama Mia
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posted July 05, 2005 05:39 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Mama Mia     Edit/Delete Message
That is so true they can be so fixed Aqua men and seems like once they make that decision to do it,it is a done deal despite how they feel about you as you said. I know with all my being that my last Aqua care for me still deeply but his fixed stradegy won't let him do anything else. So I came to the conclusion skip it I have tried so hard to rectify my actions and make peace with him and this but he wont. And it has been times when I could feel that he wanted too.. I am not that fixed either that I cannot forgive. Especially when he was the one that really did the wrong. I have had 3 Aqua's all three I really did like. The one I did not mention we had a real strong bond to very attracted to each other he had Mercury in Pisces so that made him a lil more down to earth,but he had a girlfriend that he could not get over so I let that go..

I did not know that you and your Aqua broke up last I heard from you you were still seeing each other..You never know with those guys they are so unpredictable.

I will tell you this if I meet another Aqua I will be ready, I know all there is to know about them now. PLUS I have Aqua in Merc which always help and I have learned how to use it too..

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BlueTopaz124
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From: Portland, OR
Registered: Jan 2004

posted July 05, 2005 06:49 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for BlueTopaz124     Edit/Delete Message
Yesss....we did get back together, but was very hard on me. Stayed involved longer than I really should. He knew it was hard and we talked about a lot, but should have made a clean break of it when we first broke up rather than what we did. Reason I didn't talk about it, was it hurt too much. This happened back at the end of April. I still have strong feelings for him, and we're still connected. I can feel his energy at times and know when he's thinking about me. What is it about these Aqua men? Is it because they're so detached that they can always be interesting and not get emotionally involved - they can stay charming no matter what? I think that must be it. I have no problem being detached from things, almost too much. Problem is when my heart is involved - look out. It's my Sagittarius sun/Asc/Mars and Aquarius Moon. I can be pretty 'out there' tooo, like an Aquarius.

kisses,
Laura

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SecretGardenAgain
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Posts: 422
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posted July 05, 2005 07:27 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for SecretGardenAgain     Edit/Delete Message
wow, there really IS something with these aqua men. what am i lacking in this relationship with the aries? nothing really. but its the special somethin the aqua had, that tugs at my heartstrings. the guy hung up on me randomly, flaked out, forgot my birthday (cardinal sin number 1!!!!!), and never had the guts to tell me he loved me...so WHY do i still remember him so wistfully, with thoughts so full of girly mush? i swear, we women can be as impossible as men!

and yes, the fixed sign men are a little bit crazy and so difficult because they see no need to change their ways whatsoever, but then again, thats a challenge, and i love men who are strong and a tad bit stubborn, and can stand their ground. seems like nowadays u cant stumble across a man who isnt confused or a total bum, if you do have that luck then you run into one of these driven, charismatic, overachieving, stubborn as the rock of friggin gibraltar fixed men. not to mentino they have CHARISMA unlike anything!

quote:
I'm a mutable sign (so are you), plus being a woman, and I'm softer. I might be impulsive and get angry, but I know what I'm doing and will change how I feel later. It doesn't take me long. I am never so fixed in my ways that I'm not willing to change. Especially if I love someone, family, friend, whomever it is.

yes i can TOTALLY relate to this being a mutable woman myself and what is our problem seriously, i think its that we're too compromising. my scorp stellium tends to ward off that tendency, venus in aries is aggressive really, i was on the debate team all of high school and now climbing my way up to management at work, valedictorian and basically like to lead a lot,

still, 99 percent of time in life i find myself at this crossroads of, trust my decision making or please so-and-so? and sometimes i will cave in (gem sun/mars/merc, libra rising, venus in 7th!), other times i will take my stand (scorp moon/saturn/pluto in 1st/2nd),

it never gets less difficult though!

mama mia those are some awesome aspects u had going on...i have gem sun conjunct my current bfs gemini moon (hes an aries sun, conj. my venus in aries). and i do not have any planets in aqua except jupiter yet i feel so strongly drawn to the aqua over the aries. its more like the aries is drawn to me, i love him but have a magnetic fascination/deep deep longing for the aqua, who in turn just loves himself most

how does it work anyway, it never works for me

Love
SG

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SecretGardenAgain
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posted July 05, 2005 07:30 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for SecretGardenAgain     Edit/Delete Message
MM, i would like to ask, in the sun/moon conj, i know urs was a double whammy so perhaps u wouldnt be able to isolate the affect, but who usually is drawn to who ? ive read that the sun person has the upper hand in the relationship/more power, whereas the moon person is drawn to the sun person in the case of conjunct,

if u have any other examples could u give a yay or nay on that?

thanks

Love
SG

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BlueTopaz124
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From: Portland, OR
Registered: Jan 2004

posted July 05, 2005 08:09 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for BlueTopaz124     Edit/Delete Message
SG...those are exactly my reasons for loving Aquarius men/fixed sign men. They're a tad bit stubborn, know what they want (I LOVE that), strong, driven (I LOVE that tooo), but if he has a Gemini moon, look out...he's there one minute, gone the next. I mean that. That was what I couldn't take. Mix that aspect up with the Aquarius detachment and he's connected one minute, disconnected the next. My Aqua had Merc in Pisces, so he's a feeling type of guy and can relate to women very well. My Merc is in Scorpio, so we could understand each other very well, emotion-wise.


kisses for you tooo
Laura

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shop22much
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Posts: 212
From: you said hello
Registered: Apr 2005

posted July 05, 2005 09:24 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for shop22much     Edit/Delete Message
wow blue, i know where youre coming from, i fell for a aqua sun and gemini moon, pain in my ass...any tips?
anyone want to have a chatroom about the aquas were dealing with?? i think we should all chat in a room and discuss...

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BlueTopaz124
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Posts: 367
From: Portland, OR
Registered: Jan 2004

posted July 05, 2005 10:30 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for BlueTopaz124     Edit/Delete Message
LOL...shop22much...we need a class!


No, actually, next time I know exactly how to handle it better. Be a little more mysterious, but not too much. Be interesting and playful, just be myself. But...hold my cards a little closer to my chest and not be so honest about my feelings. Aquas are very good about wanting to know all about what's going on in your head and holding back with what's going on in theirs. It's not about playing games, but holding your own.

kisses,
Laura

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shop22much
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From: you said hello
Registered: Apr 2005

posted July 05, 2005 10:36 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for shop22much     Edit/Delete Message
or a book! :/

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running_bull
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Posts: 275
From: the desert, usa
Registered: Nov 2004

posted July 06, 2005 12:02 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for running_bull     Edit/Delete Message
SG,
I hope that I will get over him also; like you I may not truly know if the Virgo is over me, but he's with someone else and that is a good indication, lol.

Thank you for the wise words, I needed to read some and know that I am not being silly. I feel the "incompleteness" too, but my heart and mind are open to being filled up with good things and new experiences. I truly hope we all meet someone to love and cherish, who loves and cherishes us back just as strong and openly.

p.s. I'm all for a class, but about Virgo and Taurus men. Oh man can they be difficult... in fairness so can I.

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Mama Mia
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posted July 06, 2005 10:39 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Mama Mia     Edit/Delete Message
Ok ladies here it goes...As far as the double whammy goes I felt more drawn to him but when the relationship ended I found out later that he was so inlove with me that it scared him half to death. So I guess it was really mutual but he just hid it real good as they do...It is true thoughthe sun person hold the cards with my last Aqua I was so drawn to him and he was the dominant one. Although I have Venus in Aqua along with my moon and that made him really attacted to me too. And we both had Merc in Aqua. And I see why I am so attracted to Aqua men as you have said Blue...I like men too that can stand up and all that but you have to know when to hold and when to fold simple as that. To me it is a sign of immaturity everything does not have to go your way...WOW a Aqua sun and Gem moon I do not know about that he is flighty as heck.. That one I would rather noth have delt with. Men with Gem moons can be flighty to a tee. My lil ones dad is a Vigo with Gem moon and man I could never keep my finger on him until I released his butt,now I know everything but now I do not care. Blue I do know what you mean by saying that you still feel his energy. IT is something to feel that. Just as early as last week I felt my ex-thinking about me it was weird it makes me feel real weak but I know what it is. BC we both have Merc in Aqua I could pull him to. IT is just them being mature enough to see a very significant relationship when it is there. Later after you have gone about your way and moved on then they get it but then it is to late..Oh and one more thing Jealouy they can be very jealous especially the one I was last with. He tried to conceal but I saw it real clear and he was very insecure too. Anything else that I can help with please holla.

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softailmomma
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From: Carson City, Nevada, USA
Registered: Jul 2005

posted July 17, 2005 02:00 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for softailmomma     Edit/Delete Message
Is there help for me? Wayne:Sag,LeoR,58;me:Canc,PisR 55. Both times since 3/03 things were just not right f/us.24 yrs & my husband dies in 2002; two broken legs in Cancun with Wayne; 5 mos later totalled my Porsche traumatic brain inj, in hosp f/4 mos. We were so special when things were right; when wrong - he was secretive; deceiving; he's a fun-loving Sag alright:gets the girls easily I fear. While in hosp he finds this Pisces and 11 mos later, he spys on her, she lies alot to him (he hates that except when its him)she cheats on him. I thought God answered my prayer- Wayne reentered my world this Feb only to take another girl to Pisces hse to screw her on Pisces bed while she's in Mex. He just w/o anything leaves me; his hse is broken into,classic car, hse locks superglued and I get blamed. 3 nights ago at Boz Scagg concert - he comes in -by himself and sits at our table (girlfriend and I) I didn't talk with him. He has so dishonored me and OH! has a TPO on me and we are going to a hearing in two weeks. Yet, why does he come to the concert? Does he just want to see my reaction to him? I don't think he and Pisces are really together. He has known my heart and that I've been his only champion ever; treated him so well, he electrified my world, we have so many like interests - I just can't understand why he would treat me like one of his one night stands. All my research and he seems so different than all the Sag articles I've read. I can FEEL she was the force behind some so he would hate me; I "felt" the real reason he cut his long hair. Things just flash in the front of my head and dance merrily by. I can still "feel" some of his heart. He did tell me he wanted to raise his sights higher and for more sofistacation. Pardon me, the boy's from back hills Alabama; I'm not lower class; I feel that since I lost my 69 Porsche, all my money was embezzled while in hosp by family member - bye, bye Wayne - I don't know - he's just seemingly very different since he met this Pisces. And the funny thing: I truly feel just as much Pisces as my Sun Cancer. Except I'm not mean - he has found out more than once she is. Man, I love this man. It was incredible to have this kind of love twice in one life time. Well, hopefully, someone can enlighten me or administer the Vulcan mind grip. You all know how tenacious Lunar children can be. Thanks, Maggie.

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running_bull
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From: the desert, usa
Registered: Nov 2004

posted July 25, 2005 05:42 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for running_bull     Edit/Delete Message
Hi Softailmomma,
Sorry, I don't have any advice for you. Working through difficult feelings and realizations is something we all have to do from time to time.

I am working through my feelings of loss and longing from the point of view that it's only my feelings. I do not take into account my ex's felings, I assume that he doesn't think of or love me at all. This helps me concentrate on what I want and what will make me feel better. It's selfish in a way, but needed. I hope you find your way. Good luck.

------------------
"Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish."

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running_bull
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From: the desert, usa
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posted September 19, 2005 01:56 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for running_bull     Edit/Delete Message
quote:
In fairness and respect to myself any future loves, I am not going to put effort into not thinking about him or actively trying to forget everything about him. It's too much effort.

Instead, I am thankful for the good he brought to my life and grateful that I learned from everything else like. He will cross my mind and then the thought will pass.
I figure sooner or later he will wander through my thoughts like an old friend might - in passing.

I'm thinking in answer to the question of how to forget an unforgettable person or how we get over the person we still love and have/had strong connections with, is time... in time they fade. Become more distant and less about/connected to the person we are currently.


Well, now it has been about 8 months since the break-up and this philosophy is actually working for me. He's fading, not quickly, but little by little.

Hope everyone else is feeling better these last few months.

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