posted December 29, 2005 02:21 PM         

I watched a few episodes of Dr. Phil the other day. On his show, he was counseling a newlywed couple that they needed to learn how to be friends in order for their relationship to work. That they do things together and have fun. I thought that was interesting and decided to check out his website for additional things he had to say. I really recommend reading it whenever you have some time because there were things on it that made me think.

www.drphil.com

Best

posted December 29, 2005 05:27 PM         

Capricorns aren't typically people who need to have romantic partners. We go for long periods (years) without any action whatsoever, and then out of the blue something happens. I, myself, have had a 4 year stint without sex as an adult. I'm saying that sex for a Capricorn male isn't something he feels he has control over. When he gets it he's grateful. If he stops having sex of his own will, then it's typically an issue with the relationship (and that's where he's coming from).

Here are the questions I'd want answered if I were him:

Why would you not want to have sex?
What is the sex compromising?
What does removing the sexual component add to the relationship?
Is this a power thing? Is our sex life always going to be determined by your whim? If I have a sexual urge or need are you going to ignore it? Should I do the same for your urges and needs?

He is going to definitely continue to feel rejected if you can't come up with answers to the above questions.

quote:

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I have no interest in going out and doing all the things that others do. Going out just to drink until you’re sick in the morning… find a lover, etc. It just seems so pointless at this moment… like it’s not enriching me in any way.

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I've never been one to feel compelled to do those things, so I think your Cap can or should be able to understand this perfectly well.

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I think, honestly, that what you really want is to break up with him without sending him away. Maybe having a relationship is just too much stress for you right now. You don't want to be responsible for his ego or fulfilling his needs. I think you want to lower his priority in your life to the bottom where it makes more sense for you. I think a Capricorn could understand that there are more important concerns in your life, and that he must learn to be flexible and give you the kind of space that you need to get your stuff done. I would recommend taking back the no-sex rule (as that can only serve to alienate him). Instead establish boundaries. Tell him that sex can no longer be a given when you guys get together romantically. If it happens, it happens, but if there's a reason sex would not be a good idea for you on a particular night or day he's got to be able to understand that.

posted December 30, 2005 12:04 PM         

Just a quick glance at your natal positions shows me that transiting Mars in Taurus has been opposing many of your Scorpio natal placements. Mars has just come out of retrograde so many of these areas have been hit twice and are getting hit with the final third pass. Frustrations are many!!

When you take the time to start paying attention to your transits and understanding their influence on your natal chart...it becomes extremely helpful in figuring out the whys and hows of what you are experiencing on different levels.

All of this in your 8th house (current Mars transiting for you) may explain some of your feelings with regards to the sexual issues within your relationship etc....perhaps money issues as well.

Transiting Uranus is in your 5th house of relationships as well...and will very soon be opposing your n. Saturn. And will then move into your 6th house in Summer 2006.

Transiting Saturn (retrograde now) in Leo is crossing back over your natal Jupiter...possibly lending to the feeling of restricting your desires to feel optimistic and joyous.

There are lots of interps which you can read and a great place to begin is at the Bob Marks site!!

http://www.bobmarksastrologer.com/transits18.0.htm

Mostly, go with your INTUITION and trust more in yourself.

You be you and be your BEST You!

Let him be him...at whatever level he is living. Being friends is OK...just be clear on what constitutes these boundaries between you two!!

Good Luck!!

posted December 31, 2005 02:54 AM         

So he's not really perfect after all...didn't have all that info. I have no idea what to tell you about a Cap with an addiction. I can see where a Cap would be very good at concealing it, and very motivated to do so. The only drugs I've known myself to be addicted to are nicotine and caffiene, and I quit smoking two years ago. If you would have told me back then that I should quit smoking I would've agreed with you. No help really.

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