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Author Topic:   Getting to know a Cancer Male
tinasparkle
Knowflake

Posts: 30
From: Orlando, FL, USA
Registered: Sep 2006

posted September 21, 2006 07:53 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for tinasparkle     Edit/Delete Message
Hello all,
I am terribly sorry to hear about the recent turn of events with CelticFyre and her fellow. However, you were all so insightful and I wondered if I could perhaps seek some Scorpio Female/Cancer Male advice of my own. I am actually a Sag, but you would never know it. As far as I know, I have a Capricorn Moon and Sun and all of my planets are in Scorpio. I am in a friendship with a textbook Cancer Male and I want very much for this relationship to be something more. We met 2 ½ months ago when he moved in next door. It is evident that we share a mutual attraction, but I have been racking my brain trying to figure out if he has a romantic interest. Although he does not behave the way other men who have courted me did, my gut and intuition tells me he’s crazy about me. He isn’t passive/aggressive at all, I’m just not familiar with this kind of guy and am not clear on the signals. This is what I know..... Sometimes he acts like a friend, other times he is like a little boy with a crush. We spend hours on end talking. He seems to think everything that I say or do is amazing and brilliant. He has told me his entire life story, about his family, career, previous relationships, anxieties, etc. He has given me all his favorite books to read and has made copies of every CD he loves, brings me bars of organic chocolate9 we are both foodies), gave me a plant for my garden, etc. He seems to think of silly reasons to come see me, or he leaves things at my house, i.e. his lighter, glasses. Most of his spare time seems to be spent with me and he doesn’t really socialize with anyone else. I have a roommate and although we sometimes engage in conversation as a group, his demeanor is totally different with me than with her. He is sweet and almost childlike with me at times and opens up much more. My question in two fold, 1. How do you tell if a Cancer guy who is your friend wants to be more? 2. If he is insecure and shy, which he has told me he is, do I need to let him know how I feel about him? I am afraid that he has no idea that I have an interest (although to my mind you would have to be blind not to notice) and won’t make a move because he is afraid I will reject him. Any thoughts?

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OzMeg222
Knowflake

Posts: 196
From:
Registered: Jul 2006

posted September 21, 2006 10:54 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for OzMeg222     Edit/Delete Message
Copious amounts of alcohol is always good!

Lol.

No, thats a bad bad idea. But its the only idea I have. Sorry!

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cancerrg
Knowflake

Posts: 2013
From:
Registered: Dec 2004

posted September 23, 2006 04:49 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for cancerrg     Edit/Delete Message
answer to the first question: when he acts the way , your man is doing .

answer to the second question :yeah , you might nedd to to tell him bcoz in majority chances , he isn't going to do anything as such.

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hippichick
Knowflake

Posts: 645
From: The Ether
Registered: Jan 2006

posted September 24, 2006 10:42 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for hippichick     Edit/Delete Message
Cancer guys can be real insecure and horribly afraid of rejection. I had a very bad expereince with a triple Cancer--would not go there again.

Why don't you just go for it and ask him out?

Nothing to loose!

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OzMeg222
Knowflake

Posts: 196
From:
Registered: Jul 2006

posted September 24, 2006 12:14 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for OzMeg222     Edit/Delete Message
Really? I mostly have cancer men as close friends.

Guess maybe thats why my cancer-guy kept making negative comments about my pisces-boy friday night. Thought at the time he was being a bit rude, maybe it was just insecurity (and probably jealousy).

Is loyalty a part of being cancer? Every cancer I know seems to have an unshakable moral compass, if you do right by them they are your steadfast friend but mess with them and you're erased from their life forever. I really like that about all the ones I know.

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hippichick
Knowflake

Posts: 645
From: The Ether
Registered: Jan 2006

posted September 24, 2006 01:42 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for hippichick     Edit/Delete Message
Oooo jealousy is HUGE with Cancer males, I believe coming from their insecurity.

I do not think loyalty is it. I think once they get their crab claws into something/someone, they have a hard time letting go. Once a Cancer loves, he/she loves for life, traditional astrology says anyway.

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Dulce Luna
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Posts: 1199
From: The Asylum
Registered: Mar 2006

posted September 24, 2006 04:19 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Dulce Luna     Edit/Delete Message
quote:
if you do right by them they are your steadfast friend but mess with them and you're erased from their life forever


That is so true, I couldn't have said this better myself. I don't waste my time with fake friends/loves and I have NO problem letting them go.


Other than that, it sounds like this guy likes you, Tina. I wouldn't go to all that trouble for someone I didn't like. I think this would answer question #1 for you. Does he have a virgo moon or mars btw? Its just because he seems to do all these little things for you.

As for #2, if he's kinda shy like he says he is...then yes, you may have to be the one to make the first move. We cracbs (male and female) and stubborn in that respect if we're shy....we wont budge!!! (LOL)

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OzMeg222
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Posts: 196
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posted September 24, 2006 06:14 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for OzMeg222     Edit/Delete Message
Didn't know jealousy was part of the cancer thing! Guess thats cos I've only ever had them as friends in the past.

I thought this cancer-guy was very self assured and confident. He spoke a lot about his family, good and really bad stuff. Thats why I thougt it was a bit weird that he said rude things about pisces-boy. They weren't really rude they were more petty than anything.

TINASPARKLE:-
If you like this guy go for it, it really does sound like he's interested. He seems to do things for you that friends wouldn't.

I read here a while ago to accept the behaviour of any guy (no matter what the relationship) with the same standards as you have for your friends. Sounds like this guy is going above and beyond. Go for it!

Actually I should listen to that advice too!

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tinasparkle
Knowflake

Posts: 30
From: Orlando, FL, USA
Registered: Sep 2006

posted September 25, 2006 10:11 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for tinasparkle     Edit/Delete Message
Thank you all for your comments. Yeah, I think he's crazy about me! It seems that things are moving along very nicely and I am not altogether certain that I will need to make the first move. I would rather he take the initiative as I am kind of old fashioned in that regard. He has started coming out of his shell more and more and has actually started initiating time together and being more bold. I am very fortunate that he does not seem to have that snippy and cranky Cancer component when he is threatened. In fact, he seems to feel the need to protect me from the world and handles me very delicately. I had posted a question about this in the astrology section, but thought I would ask you all as well. This is what I said:

“……..I have been doing all of those things that Cancers love. I bring him baked goods, ask him about his day, leave him little notes, etc. Fortunately I am a total mother hen anyway and he just eats it up. But I want to have as much insight as possible.
I have started charting his moods according to the moon phase and that has helped me know what to expect a little.
I have made an effort to compliment him when ever possible, which generally results in an "aw shucks" kind of response, but I think he likes it. He was going to shave his beard and when I said "oh, no it's cute!" well, he decided to keep it. I think that's a good sign. He doesn't really compliment me a lot physically, he said my hair was cute, my feet are cute, and my first response was to worry, but he compliments me in all of the areas that really seem to matter to him. ???----this seems to be changing and he is really into my feet, why?
We had two really wonderful chats last night and in the first, the subject of some of my childhood "trauma" came up. He seemed really disturbed and actually brought it up in the next conversation. I have noticed that he has a strong need to watch out for me be it heavy lifting or guys who look at me the wrong way, but I have been reluctant to share any of my "personal issues" because I wanted him to feel like he could open up without interruption. However, I am wondering if perhaps sharing some of these things might bring us closer and if he needs to feel in some way like the knight in shining armor? Is this a male Cancerian trait?”

Any thoughts on the above questions would be appreciated. You don’t have to answer the one about why he likes my feet although I had heard that Cancer men are breast men. True? God I hope so! As to the Virgo Moon or Mars questions,I haven't a clue. I know his date and place of birth, but I am just learning about astrology.


Thanks,

Tinasparkle

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cancerrg
Knowflake

Posts: 2013
From:
Registered: Dec 2004

posted September 25, 2006 12:17 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for cancerrg     Edit/Delete Message
on the first look of it , cancers ain't exactly knights in the shining armor , they normally avoid confrontations . thats their first reaction always , they are also known to be passive by some but but but astrology also refers to them as the foot soldiers meaning the one who mainly kill bcos of their emotional attachment to their emperor or causes .
cancers are/can be bloody extremist people. they are into violence but its normally when they are pushed to an end otherwise they are normally democratic people .

they are traditional yet modern .they are chauvinstic too .

so in all probablity dont expect him to fight with the road romeos untill ofcourse they cross the certain limits .
the moral compass philosphy very truly applies here as well .

split personality, huh.........

ok, why he likes your feets , may be he is taurus mooner or may has taurus venus .
i like clean feets , they are always a turn on . i am a taurus mooner nad have mars in virgo .
as far as breasts are concerned , do i need to say anything about it .
but cancer men are not necessarilly only breast man (there is a movie with same name starring nicolas cage )
we like women , in every form .
cancer itself is a feminine sign ,may be thats the logic that we see woman in their terms too .

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cancerrg
Knowflake

Posts: 2013
From:
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posted September 25, 2006 12:23 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for cancerrg     Edit/Delete Message
oh i just reread , i think i took the question in a different way .
but the answer almost remains same , you can open with him , you wont be burdening him .
they love being the protectors , mothering quality ,you know

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Dulce Luna
Knowflake

Posts: 1199
From: The Asylum
Registered: Mar 2006

posted September 25, 2006 12:35 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Dulce Luna     Edit/Delete Message
If he likes feet, he must have a piscean influence...like maybe the moon in pisces.

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tinasparkle
Knowflake

Posts: 30
From: Orlando, FL, USA
Registered: Sep 2006

posted September 25, 2006 12:40 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for tinasparkle     Edit/Delete Message
To Cancerrg:
Thanks!

To all:
Any others with thoughts please feel free to share them!This has been such an interesting experience because I have only known one Cancer and he was certainly not a romantic interest. Cancer men seem to be an entirely different breed of man. They are just lovely. Even if they aren't the knight in shining armor sort, their shyness and indirect manor seems to make them more genuine in their affection.
It's good to know that he enjoys my opening up to him. It seems to bring us closer.
Okay, now the embarrsing question, but I have to ask. I know we are all individuals and shaped by our own experiences, not just our planets, but that said, what are Cancer men typically like in the sack?

Tinasparkle

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tinasparkle
Knowflake

Posts: 30
From: Orlando, FL, USA
Registered: Sep 2006

posted September 26, 2006 10:33 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for tinasparkle     Edit/Delete Message
one more question.... He does this funny thing were we will be talking and he will smile at me a giggle just a little. Why? It's not all the time but it's kind of strange. At first I thought I had done something funny that I hadn't realized, but now I think there must be something going on inside his head. Is this a Cancer behavior?

Tinasparkle

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cancerrg
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posted September 26, 2006 11:25 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for cancerrg     Edit/Delete Message
:::Cancer men seem to be an entirely different breed of man. :::

you are just the newest one to realise this !
btw, to tell you a secret , scorp women are enchnting!

how are they in sack?

tey it ! and you will know!

as far as i know they are the fewest to match a scorps stamina and apetitite for it its just that they never make show of it .

you wont be dishertend!

:::He does this funny thing were we will be talking and he will smile at me a giggle just a little. Why?:::

oh, its nothing its just that he knows those little gigles and eye contact make him instantly reach people .
and with special one , he is just reaffirming his interest otherwise cancers dont normally see eye to eye when talking !

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Dulce Luna
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From: The Asylum
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posted September 26, 2006 05:40 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Dulce Luna     Edit/Delete Message
Oh, were the best in the sack,not even them scorps can touch us. Sike! Why don't you.....find out and tell us!

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tinasparkle
Knowflake

Posts: 30
From: Orlando, FL, USA
Registered: Sep 2006

posted September 26, 2006 06:24 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for tinasparkle     Edit/Delete Message
I'm not so worried about performance, just wanting to know if he is likely to be shy, assertive, ???? The last fellow I was with was an Aquarius and a little too aggressive for me. I found it a little intimidating. He wasn't a bully or anything, he just didn't seem to be able to connect emotionally to sex, it was all about the physical and a good time and not really quiet and tender. Sometimes a girl needs quiet,sweet and tender. The Aries before him was disinterested in sex for the most part, but that was a personal issue and not really about astrology I think.


Tinasparkle

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OzMeg222
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Posts: 196
From:
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posted September 27, 2006 05:16 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for OzMeg222     Edit/Delete Message
Not sleazy when it comes to making the moves, more chivalrous and gallant. Its nice!

SO NOT SHY IN THE BEDROOM!!!

But maybe that was just cancer-guy I know. He was also very considerate, more interested in my pleasure than his own.

My cancer-guy asked me out the minute he knew I'd been separated from my ex (whom he knows) for a year. Its really surprising we haven't run into each other in that time, cos I my ex and I knew him.

My best friend is married to his best friend. They love us both which is kinda scary I'd hate to start anything and have it go pear shaped.

Is it usual for a cancer-guy to be so open in asking someone out?

Admittedly he'd had a few beers but wasn't really ****** . He got jealous over some things though which seemed normal to me.

One of my best friends is a cancer male and I have more respect for him than I do for any other man, this cancer-guy reminds me of him in a lot of ways actually.

Where are all the cancer men??? I've only met 3 (2 are extremely close mates) and I'm liking them a lot.

Thats 3 outta 3!

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tinasparkle
Knowflake

Posts: 30
From: Orlando, FL, USA
Registered: Sep 2006

posted September 27, 2006 09:56 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for tinasparkle     Edit/Delete Message
Thanks OzMeg222,

It's nice to know that more than likely we will be compatible in that sense. The Aquarius was just a bit much for me. Great guy, but saw sex and love as very seperate. I don't.

To all,

Things seem to be moving along nicely. He was MIA yesterday but it was raining all day and I have noticed a correlation between days when it rains and his keeping to himself. Also, I guy Jupiter was really close by or something. I heard it on the radio, but just in passing. I'm not sure what effect this would have. He was also a little cranky this morning, but I suspect something at work is bothering him. Any tips for how to soothe him? Also, do Cancer people ever have the issue of saying something and having it come out al together wrong? He kind of insulted me a little this morning and he was actaully trying to compliment me and I think it came out a**backwards.

Tinasparkle

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Dulce Luna
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Posts: 1199
From: The Asylum
Registered: Mar 2006

posted September 27, 2006 11:52 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Dulce Luna     Edit/Delete Message
quote:
He was MIA yesterday but it was raining all day and I have noticed a correlation between days when it rains and his keeping to himself


Omg, that is so me....and my boyfriend has to come and poke my shell with his stinger (Nicely of course.........or else )

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tinasparkle
Knowflake

Posts: 30
From: Orlando, FL, USA
Registered: Sep 2006

posted September 27, 2006 12:45 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for tinasparkle     Edit/Delete Message
Dulce Luna,

How to you feel when the moon is Waning? I've noticed during the New and Waxing Moon he is really connected and thinks I am fabulous, Full Moon he's good, but Waning Moon he disconnects.

Tinasparkle

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tinasparkle
Knowflake

Posts: 30
From: Orlando, FL, USA
Registered: Sep 2006

posted October 06, 2006 01:12 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for tinasparkle     Edit/Delete Message
Hello all,

I just wanted to thank you all for your insights. Things are going sooooooo well. We are going away for a day trip this weekend and have been spending a lot of time together. He has been initiating dinners, etc. I am so happy and look forward to the future. Thanks again and any other fun tips about Cancer men are always welcome.

Tinasparkle

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Dulce Luna
Knowflake

Posts: 1199
From: The Asylum
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posted October 06, 2006 01:15 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Dulce Luna     Edit/Delete Message
Oops!Sorry I never saw that last question!


For the answer, I don't know how I feel during the waning moon because I never actually check. All I know is that things get crazy whenever there's an eclipse (especially solar) or when the moon is in scorpio.

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tinasparkle
Knowflake

Posts: 30
From: Orlando, FL, USA
Registered: Sep 2006

posted October 12, 2006 01:48 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for tinasparkle     Edit/Delete Message
That's fine Dulce Luna. I think things are going quite well. Some of my moon phase charting is out the window because we are growing closer and therefore he is less likely to distance himself when he is feeling melancholy. I appreciate everyone's insight. You have all been so very helpful.

Tinasparkle

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tinasparkle
Knowflake

Posts: 30
From: Orlando, FL, USA
Registered: Sep 2006

posted October 13, 2006 12:15 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for tinasparkle     Edit/Delete Message
Just a little update for everyone. Things are progressing nicely. I still have moments where I am impatient and want us to be a couple NOW! but most of the time I am very happy and contented letting things progress naturally. Apparently my romantic outlook is good for this coming year and I should expect to be in a significant romantic relationship around November which is my birth month. Who knew? We went on a day trip last weekend and had a lovely time. I have let more of the outgoing and assertive part of my personality out and I think he quite likes it. I am so accustom to men finding that part of me overwhelming, but he doesn't. The other evening he wasn;t feeling well but was going to go for a bike ride and I asked him if he didn;t think it was too silly, would he please knock on the door when he got home and let me know he was home safe. He lookd me right in the eye and said "I don't think it's silly, in fact it's quite nice" I don;t know why, but I felt that this was significant.We have been spending more and more time together and last night during one of our many evening "chats" he said sort of out of the blue and off topic "I have pictures,would you like to see them?" I said sure thinking that some time down the line he would get out what ever the pictures were that he wanted to show me. Well, he got up and retrieved them right then and proceeded to show me all of his photos from the last 10 years. All of the places he has lived and all of his close friends. He said " now you have faces to go with the names of people I talk about" I thought it was really sweet and I thanked him for sharing this with me. I really enjoyed it, but I wondered why he felt compelled to show me right then at 11:30 at night and why it seemed so out of the blue. Also, he seems really excited about my birthday which is coming up in November. Any thoughts as to why? Thank you all so much for your thoughts over the last month and for listening to my ramblings.

Tinasparkle

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