posted April 14, 2006 06:29 PM         

I've been doing some really deep soul-searching (hey, the words analyse and detail aren't lexigrams in my name for nothing!!!!)

There seems to be a pattern in my life where the men that I love leave me and return to relationships with their ex-partners. (I know patterns repeat until they are understood and broken - this is a separate issue that I need to deal with.)

It's like I teach them things about themsElf and then through me, they learn the value of what they had with their ex-partners.

If I'd not been an evolved soul, I would have taken this at face (ego) level/value and perhaps worn this as being inadequate in some fashion. But I know that they return mostly because they did not let these people go in the first instance.

This morning, I had a revelation. I feel with my last bf that my karmic tie was actually with his ex-gf, not him. I had extremely strong energy connections with her. I could always feel her cords reaching out to him (and I haven't even met her). One day, I actually described the physical body of the energy I felt - and my bf later told me I had described her so accurately that it made him freak). I didn't realise it was a living person's energy that I felt. I had told him that I thought it was a past love from a past life energy. I now realise that she was/is both.

Another time I felt her energy and told him that something was up. Within 30 seconds, she sent him a text message. So, I feel the bond is with her, not him. I feel as though I promised her in a previous incarnation, that if things didn't work out between them in this incarnation, I'd come along and push him back to her. And essentially, that's exactly what I've done. Unfortunately, I fell in love with him in order to do it.

When I look back at my other relationships, I see the pattern. So did my soul, before incarnation, just go around promising to do this for souls and I'm wondering just how many more other souls are lining up for the same thing from me???

I tell you, if you want to reunite with an ex.......then I'm the soul for you!

But seriously, is this part of my soul's purpose, and when will I be done so that I can find a soul that will stay?

What do you think?

posted April 14, 2006 06:35 PM         

quote:

---

But seriously, is this part of my soul's purpose, and when will I be done so that I can find a soul that will stay?

---

Just keep being you.. and you'll sense the difference. Oh, it's coming.. and soon!

I feel that.

posted April 14, 2006 07:08 PM         

thank you for your very kind words and encouragement. You have always been lovely to me here and I really appreciate your advice.

Hmm, another LL member has just alerted me to the fact that I might be lining up as soul-reuniter for yet another friendship that I've recently made. Doh! Not that there's anything romantic between us, nor do I visualise there being anything romantic between us. There's just a string of synchronicity which always seems to suck me in.

Now I'm sure there's a sign tatooed on my head saying: "Soul Re-Uniter, come one come all".

posted April 14, 2006 08:04 PM         

If your spirit guide told you that there will be no soul that stays, but joy along the journey anyway, would you still feel your purpose here was worth it?? What does it take inside to come to an acceptance of that postulate??

I don't think that your hypothesis means 'no one here for you', in fact, I feel something down the road for you, but not near yet. I feel something down the road for me too, but it's too nebulous for me to get a good grasp of the energies so that my 3rd-dimensional consciousness can understand -- something's coming, that's all I know.....

posted April 15, 2006 07:18 AM         

The simplest solution to end this cycle, if you choose to, is to allow someone with no ex to be attracted to you.

posted April 15, 2006 06:53 PM         

hmm, re your suggestion - for someone to have no ex either means they would be very very young (illegal in my country ), an ex-monk, or someone who doesn't get out much (you know the 35yo bachelor who lives at home with mum!!!).

I think that I need to find my spiritual equivalent because they will have let go of the past.

Hi Selena, yes, humour is what keeps me going. That and my faith in the unknown (which is what I think you were getting at, 'Zala) - yup, patience and perserverance is the order of the day.

Thanks all for your replies.

posted April 17, 2006 11:09 PM         

wow, congratulations on your find.

Yeah, love is wonderful isn't it? And, it CAN happen at any age!

I did think however, that this last one was Mr Right....lol. But there was so much to say it ain't so.

You know, I'm really not worried whether or not I will find someone because I am a strong and independent woman and to me, life is not about finding a partner. Life is about growing into the best person you can be.

If it's meant to be, then, it WILL happen.

Thanks for your love and support.

posted April 18, 2006 04:49 PM         

It really only started happening to me in 2001 when I separated from my husband. But I met him when I was 17, so I hadn't gone out with a lot of guys before that.

I've been told I am a natural counsellor and I can't help wondering whether my psuedo-counselling plays a huge part in the process. Well, obviously it does.

posted January 17, 2008 09:56 PM         

I've been away from LL for so long. I know this is an old post but......it has happened to me again, and I thought I would come back to find this thread and update it.

Btw, what happened to the search facility on this forum? I can't find anyway to search the posts now. Has it been removed?

Alrighty. So, here it is - the update!

I had dated a "happy cappy" for almost twelve months when I found out he had gone back to his ex-gf for a very brief affair. He told me he hadn't finished off with her properly and being with her for only four nights was enough to remind him why he left her in the first place.

He came back to me, asking for another chance. I agreed on the proviso he would adhere to several conditions (one of which was to cut all ties with this woman). We were going along quite well for about six weeks when his behaviour changed. He was withdrawing and eventually, I found out he hadn't cut ties. When I called him into account, he told me he didn't want to be in a relationship and then, yup, I found out he was dumping me to resume with her again.

He told me I was too intense (read code for I call him into account and don't let him get away with stuff) and she was lightweight (read, she's not going to be a reminder that he hasn't dealt with his issues yet).

The interesting thing is, he was only initially with her for three months before dumping her for me. We were together for 15 months.

So......there I go again - sending another soul back to their ex! Will it ever end?

posted January 18, 2008 06:02 AM         

Do you feel comfortable posting your chart? Sometimes the energies behind who we attract is more apparant to others than to ourselves!

posted January 18, 2008 09:04 AM         

I am so saddened to hear your update, hon
I wonder why mine and J's good vibes in the beginning re: HC have turned out like this??
Perhaps there was something you both needed to learn from each other and there was no other way.....
Or your Soul-Reuniter hypothesis has been validated yet again.....
{{{ hugs }}} & good thoughts to you and the fam, luv
Re: the Search -- I think Randall may have taken it down because people kept asking about it not working. In order to have it functional again, there would have to be an upgrade, and all the LL smileys would go **poof** (I guess Randall thought it was important to have them remain).....

8th ~

posted January 18, 2008 10:00 AM         

your soul must be a bery evolved one!

I hope you will find the one who will make you feel each others Soul Mate ( but this time to both of you stay together always )

posted January 18, 2008 05:21 PM         

8th, I don't know you but I know Zala well and if she's offering to send you my chart, I know there's a reason and I'm happy for her to do so.

I feel I know the lesson. It's about self-love. I thought I was there after Mr Aries but obviously I wasn't as the Universe pretty much sent me a copy-cat relationship. I get the message now. I see what I tolerated that I shouldn't have.

Hopefully now, the Universe will stop sending me these men. Plus, I'm in therapy to see if it's not some pattern of mine - who I am attracted to, which my therapist explains as immature, charismatic types.

I'm worried though, we work together and I'm on holidays now, but have just over a week before I have to go back and see him. We are in the same building, unfortunately.

Mostly I'm very hurt that he chose to treat me so poorly near the end. So many lies, and he knew with my psychic ability I would catch him out and did.

I read somewhere recently that a soul-mate relationship will only work if both partners are willing to grow. In this case, he's not. So, he has waved me goodbye.

And such is life.

posted January 18, 2008 06:12 PM         

quote:

---

The simplest solution to end this cycle, if you choose to, is to allow someone with no ex to be attracted to you.

---

quote:

---

hmm, re your suggestion - for someone to have no ex either means they would be very very young (illegal in my country ), an ex-monk, or someone who doesn't get out much (you know the 35yo bachelor who lives at home with mum!!!).

---

What about your very first bf? Did he have an ex? I mean like a high school bf.. someone you met early on. Someone who you would be first for - in the line of exs.. does that make sense?

posted January 18, 2008 11:57 PM         

At 17, I met a man who I married (12 yrs later) and then had two beautiful children to. I separated from him in 2001.

I am a person who says never say never BUT no - I won't be going back there.

*8th,
Chiron is natally at 10 deg 26'16" in my 6th house of pisces.

posted January 24, 2008 05:10 PM         

A very strange/wonderful synchronistic thing happened the other day when I went to collect my daughter's school books. I was standing in line, and then glanced at the doorway and Happy Cappy's ex-wife had just walked in to collect her daughter's school books.

Now, when I wrote about Happy Cappy and me sending him back to his ex, I wasn't referring to his ex-wife but an ex-gf he dated for a few months after her and before me.

We ended up standing in line next to each other for about 20 minutes. And we had ourselves a nice chat - comparing notes as to the treatment that Happy Cappy had dished out to both of us.

She named a woman and asked if I knew who she was because her children had told her they had been sleeping at her house and playing with her kids. I explained that she was the gf after her and before me. And that Happy Cappy had dumped me to go back with her.

I know I wrote earlier about possibly having the connection with Mr Aries ex-gf, rather than Mr Aries himself. Now I'm wondering if my connection here is with Happy Cappy's ex-wife, rather than Happy Cappy himself. I am really in a position to be able to help her in terms of the ratio of custody of her children. But I wouldn't be in this position, or have this knowledge had I not got so close to Happy Cappy.

Darn I hate that I have to fall in love with these souls before working out the connection.

Does this sound like a reasonable deduction?

posted January 28, 2008 12:29 AM         

There are guys out there who haven't had an ex yet. I, for one, am one.

I found linda's love signs book when i was 18, have believed everything linda said about twin souls & have been on a relentless pursuit for her ever since. It has been a lonely life so far but i believe in Linda & am still searching for my twin.

i am now 40 & no i don't live at home with my mum & i socialise alot. being a leo i am much an extrovert & have a bright, sunny personality.

So yes, we are out there. There is always hope.

Catch ya

posted February 19, 2008 09:26 AM         

you sound like a heady sexy female that not many men can resist -- but cannot cope with either. Why don't you post your chart up.

You are probably right about yourself being an evolved soul, but combine that with an unusual sort of sexual attractiveness which you probably possess... how many men can cope with a woman like that?

American men usually like to be quite macho and in charge so a woman who helps them learn and grow is too intimidating.

Why don't you travel abroad and find someone from a less sexist culture?

posted February 19, 2008 05:55 PM         

Good luck in your search. You sure do sound patient and determined. And I never do lose hope.....or faith.....that the Universe has me exactly where I need to be. I really believe in this. Last week was a fantastic week for me, in every corner of my life (but romance). So, the wheel is turning. What goes down will eventually come up.

Dear bellemalheur,

how frustrating for you.....now I saw a movie about this, not that long ago. The guy with this "problem" exploited it for a while but then realised it was a hollow victory. He ended up finding a girl that stayed.

Dear Sag-Cap cusp,

yes, I do know what you Saggie's are like (my ex-hubby was one) and I know about the Cappie's (as in your cusp) too, my ex-bf was one.

It's a very lovely and Saggie idea to travel but unfortunately, I don't have the money and I am a single mother so there's a problem with finding someone to look after the children if I am away for long periods of time.

Oh btw, you made a reference to the culture/nature of American men - I'm not sure if you realised but I'm in Australia.

I am a very independent, resourceful and strong woman but I think it's more my psychic ability that these men have found intimidating because, they can't lie without me finding out. The sad and interesting part is that this is probably also what they are attracted to in the first place.

I don't really consider myself a very developed psychic but at one point, I did tell Happy Cappy of dates and times that he had communicated with this woman and it freaked him out. He thought I must have been looking into his phone records (which I wasn't - I knew because at those times, I was hit by a wave of nausea and I made a note of them in my journal). It's how I caught Mr Aries out too.

Another time I was on the phone to Happy Cappy, and I could see him in a shiny piece of purple paper I have in my room. I was able to tell him what he was wearing, where he was in his house, and which ear he had the phone up to. Then, I could see him switch the phone to the other ear and when I told him, he wondered if I had a camera in his house. It's not as though I was scrying for him, he just appeared.

I recently read one of Alison Dubois's book (she is the real-life person that the tv show Medium, is based on). They interviewed Joe, her husband, saying how awful it must be to live with a psychic because they would know everthing you were thinking.

He replied by saying that she had this skill before they met and, it's no problem for him because he has nothing to hide. He said he couldn't imagine not living with her. He did say that surprising her for bdays etc was challenging.

I have wondered, if like bellemalheur that I should just be on my own. You asked how many men would be able to cope with me? I really don't know. I do know that the man I am with would need to feel very comfortable about himsElf and have nothing to hide. I'm sure there are men out there with these credentials.

With each man, I've learnt and grown so much. This next one (if there is one) is sure to be a winner.