posted November 06, 2012 02:00 PM            

I feel like for years I have obsessed in a negative way over my appearance... compulsive mirror checking, sometimes crying about it, wanting many different plastic surgeries [mostly minor but still]... and really hating how I look on the inside and afraid to even take pictures since I dread seeing my face sometimes. It sounds pitiful... I can honestly say I'm always trying to 'perfect' my appearance every single day and if I don't look as perfect as I want to, I feel crippled.

Here's my natal chart if anyone wants to take a look. This isn't a personal reading request, just some things that could stand out as to why I have BDD traits. I think it might be the Saturn sq. ASC combined with Chiron sq. ASC.

If anyone out there with similar issues wants to share, and what they think astrologically could cause it, feel free. I'd love to hear from you. It's a really hard thing to go through, disliking how you look for no actual reason... it's in part why I wanted to start this thread, in case anyone on LL has gone through a similar thing. <3

posted November 06, 2012 04:49 PM            

My good friend has a Virgo moon and writes a blog about this very issue. She also wrote a book on binge eating disorder (which I was shocked to learn that she ever suffered from.)

Also I think the singleton sun always wants to be perfect (that's how mine feels, anyway) and when it is tightly sextile your ASC, it makes sense that perfectionism will play into image issues.

posted November 06, 2012 04:56 PM            

I have similar placements, and as Faith stated, there's probably something to the Virgo Moon/Chiron conjunction (which I have). They both also square my ASC, so I'm pretty sure Chiron/ASC aspects can play a role in this.

Hang in there, and I hope you start loving your body/yourself very soon.

quote:

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Originally posted by Faith:
It's strange how hard it is for people to love ourselves.

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posted November 06, 2012 11:02 PM            

I have Sun and Venus square Saturn, and am out of shape. My body obviously needs work but I don't think I see my face like everyone else sees my face. People tell me I'm pretty a lot and even at 23 years I only half-believe it.

posted November 06, 2012 11:06 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by hannaramaa:
Forgive me for this simpler approach but I notice Doux Reve, Sweet-Scorpion (actually you're not a Scorpio are you? Just roll with me here...) and my friend are all Scorpios. My friend hates taking pictures of herself, being in pictures, being SEEN and yet it's ironic because she attracts men with her looks. She hates her nose and her family makes her feel bad about her body (she's a little chubby but nothing compared to an actual overweight or obese person.) She complains about her hair all the time too, it's probably her sorest spot. I wonder if it is a Scorpio or heavy Scorpio influence? Being more comfortable as a shadow vs. being exposed (like accepting, being comfortable and even flaunting your appearance)?

I have Sun and Venus square Saturn, and am out of shape. My body obviously needs work but I don't think I see my face like everyone else sees my face. People tell me I'm pretty a lot and even at 23 years I only half-believe it.

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posted November 07, 2012 01:53 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Faith:
It might be as simple as Moon conjunct Chiron in Virgo? With the trine to Uranus-Neptune distorting things further?

My good friend has a Virgo moon and writes a blog about this very issue. She also wrote a book on binge eating disorder (which I was shocked to learn that she ever suffered from.)

Also I think the singleton sun always wants to be perfect (that's how mine feels, anyway) and when it is tightly sextile your ASC, it makes sense that perfectionism will play into image issues.

It's strange how hard it is for people to love ourselves.

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I never thought about my Sun that way but the way you put that makes a lot of sense.

I agree that probably since my Sun is in Libra and un-aspected as well, only to my ASC and a quintile to Mars, I could probably feel the need to look perfect and have an aesthetic [since Libra rules this].

posted November 07, 2012 01:55 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by hannaramaa:
Forgive me for this simpler approach but I notice Doux Reve, Sweet-Scorpion (actually you're not a Scorpio are you? Just roll with me here...) and my friend are all Scorpios. My friend hates taking pictures of herself, being in pictures, being SEEN and yet it's ironic because she attracts men with her looks. She hates her nose and her family makes her feel bad about her body (she's a little chubby but nothing compared to an actual overweight or obese person.) She complains about her hair all the time too, it's probably her sorest spot. I wonder if it is a Scorpio or heavy Scorpio influence? Being more comfortable as a shadow vs. being exposed (like accepting, being comfortable and even flaunting your appearance)?

I have Sun and Venus square Saturn, and am out of shape. My body obviously needs work but I don't think I see my face like everyone else sees my face. People tell me I'm pretty a lot and even at 23 years I only half-believe it.

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Yeah I'm a Libra Sun but have many Scorpio influences, personal planets, an 8th house planet etc.

I can agree that also, I enjoy being in the dark when I can and hate seeing myself in too harsh of a light since it makes me look even worse.

posted November 07, 2012 01:57 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Doux Rêve:
Same issue here, SS.

I have similar placements, and as Faith stated, there's probably something to the Virgo Moon/Chiron conjunction (which I have). They both also square my ASC, so I'm pretty sure Chiron/ASC aspects can play a role in this.

Hang in there, and I hope you start loving your body/yourself very soon.

Ain't that the truth..

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Thanks for the support Doux.

I hope one day it'll be possible for me too as well. I'm getting different plastic surgeries done but ones that aren't that extreme... like dermabrasion for childhood scars, and a breast reduction hopefully. Since these realistically bad issues only make me even more depressive and sometimes feeling suicidal about my looks.

I hope we can both be OK with ourselves one day.

posted November 07, 2012 01:58 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by ail221:
Pluto in the 6th house/ Scorpio in the 6th house.
ceres in the 6th.
Saturn in the 2nd
Moon square Saturn

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I don't have any of these aspects. But I did notice that my Moon Persona chart has a 6th house Pluto, and since the Moon is our inner nature maybe this would lead one to have an ED/twisted view of themselves?

posted November 07, 2012 02:10 PM            

What I can say is that if you try to develop a greater understanding of the science of this, and the source of when and how it developed in your psyche then you can begin the next phase of your path. Helping others to cope with this.

posted November 07, 2012 03:49 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by waxlobster:
As soon as I read the heading I thought "Chiron". I now see it conjunct your Moon and square the Ascendant, from Virgo no less!!

What I can say is that if you try to develop a greater understanding of the science of this, and the source of when and how it developed in your psyche then you can begin the next phase of your path. Helping others to cope with this.

Chiron shared is how it becomes a healing energy :-) I wish you freedom from this sorrow in your soul, and the liberation to help free others.

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Thanks for the advice <3

posted November 07, 2012 10:27 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by sweet-scorpion:
I don't have any of these aspects. But I did notice that my Moon Persona chart has a 6th house Pluto, and since the Moon is our inner nature maybe this would lead one to have an ED/twisted view of themselves?

I have my two 2H planets Uranus and Neptune semi-square Saturn.

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It could be, your moon persona chart show how your moon acts on its on and dominate. I said those because I have noticed a lot of Pluto's in the 6th house or scorpio in the 6th usually have some fixation with body maintenance, body rituals/routines, ceres because its a combination of the moon(food, nourishment, with routines) Demeter/ceres the goddess of the harvest, something that is both ritual and routine; virgo. PLus if you have the ruler of your asc in the same house as these placements that would intensify it.

Then again it could be a combination of a afflicted Venus/ asc with moon/virgo combination
Saturn in the 2nd because Saturn is about restriction as well but in the 2nd house Taurus a venusian sign it could lead to issues with food, indulgence with saturn pressing down on it but again their needs to be another affliction.

posted November 08, 2012 11:35 AM            

This is my chart:

posted November 08, 2012 05:14 PM            

I might have a slightly different perspective here, but I find the IC to be an often overlooked area when it comes to discussing emotional issues in a chart.

It's a really deep part of ourselves (the root of the root, as I call it) and sweet-scorpion, I notice that yours is at an anaretic degree (29) in Pisces. The ruler of Pisces is found in your second house conjunct Uranus and may therefore contribute to your feelings of value of self and self esteem (or lack thereof). Your second house is also a Saturn-ruled house in Capricorn.

I think the best way to deal with anything IC-related is to dig down to the root to find out what is there, but I would definitely do it with support, maybe from a therapist. IC stuff, in my experience can be challenging at best. You seem like a very strong person though

Sending hugs.