posted January 16, 2013 04:39 PM            

The 11th house is the house of groups and socialization. Ever since I had this transit, which was conjunct my Mercury for some time and will end up conjunct my Venus and Jupiter [ouch]....I have just felt SO lonely because I attempt strongly to make friends in groups and end up with typical Saturnine frustrations of setbacks, awkwardness, and feeling like nobody is genuine at all.

posted January 16, 2013 05:07 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by sweet-scorpion:
...how have all of you gotten through a period like this one? I feel that no one I know understands how DIFFICULT this is...to just try so hard to make friends and feel rejected. I feel doomed since the Saturn transit lasts a while.

---

posted January 16, 2013 05:45 PM            

No but really, it's just a transit.
Won't last a lifetime and you'll feel better after it's over.

Oh Saturn conjunct Venus will basically be about the same thing. When Saturn went over my Venus/Jupiter conjunction -twice- I was left with almost nobody around me but it felt good (in the end, cause while it lasted it was quite sad). Of course I had (and still have) my lonely moments but in the long run people who are "useless" don't belong in your life.. And solid friendships in my life have become even deeper, now I know the people I can count on. They must be like 2 or 3, but hey it's better than nothing!

Also.. take a good look at your expectations. Maybe you expect a bit too much from mere mortals. People can't always be what we want them to be, and while I understand it's difficult to find someone who truly understands you, supports you and is there for you, it's important to take it easy. Don't focus too much on deep friendships or life-altering encounters. Everyone has their own life and problems, so it's only normal that we're not always focused on relationships and other people.

Last thing. Most people don't want real friendship. They want social buddies to go out with and have fun with. So don't feel rejected or whatever, it's not you, it's them. Just try to relax and have fun by yourself, if no one is around.

posted January 16, 2013 06:02 PM            

I think I've just gotten to the point where I really don't expect much from most people, which is a bit sad. If they choose to stick around then that's fine. If not, I move on. And for all the people who took the friendship for granted and suddenly assumed I would drop everything to fly to their weddings/birth of a child/fill in the blank, I have wished them well and carried on with my life. That might sound cold, but I have always put a lot in to my friendships and if there is a severe lack of balance or you end up feeling truly expendable then sometimes it's best to leave a relationship behind. Now, there are maybe three people left who I would consider true friends and for whom I would go above and beyond.

posted January 16, 2013 06:37 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Belage:
Yeah, the fake friends you don't need will fall out of your life.

But that doesn't mean you will be friendless forever. Try to understand the meaning of real friendship, work at being a good friend yourself because Saturn always involves karma, and during that transit, you can make friends that will last a lifetime.

---

I guess it's just... after three years of barely having any friends at all, I'm now trying to socialize more and make an effort and it's just not working out.

posted January 16, 2013 06:39 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by sand:
I haven't seen any of mine since. Saturn is in my h1 now! I just think of it as going another path, not looking back.

I have always been the most don't give a fuk among my circle. The transit was more than that for me. Personal issues but I'm sure they just see it as me being me.

---

posted January 16, 2013 06:42 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Debby4:
Saturn just left my 11th house! I also felt the same way. I actually start to "kick" people out of my life. ;D It's for your own good! Don't let it get you down. Like [b] Belage said "...during that transit, you can make friends that will last a lifetime." I feel like this is sooo true! I started talking to some people who I relate to more and feel more like a part of a group. Saturn is now going through my 12th house. O.O Wonder how that's going to be.[/B]

---

posted January 16, 2013 06:45 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by aquaguy91:
i can totally relate to what you are going through except i am dateless, not friendless. i have all the pals a guy could want for , but a girlfriend?thats another matter entirely... i am constantly rejected, flaked out on when it comes to dating. i guess i am blessed to have friends. so this is just a transit you are going through? just remember it will pass, i am sure you will find some friends..

---

posted January 16, 2013 06:48 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Sorcha:
I have had Uranus going through my 11th for...well, forever it seems. I have a huge 11th house. I know it's not the same as Saturn but it is similar I think. People seem to want to come and go as they please which ends up feeling awfully fair weather-ish to me. Really close friendships I had had for years suddenly disappeared and then those people would pop back in to my life again, as though they hadn't cut me off to begin with. (And I'm talking about not returning my calls for 6 months and then suddenly calling me up to ask me for a huge favour)

I think I've just gotten to the point where I really don't expect much from most people, which is a bit sad. If they choose to stick around then that's fine. If not, I move on. And for all the people who took the friendship for granted and suddenly assumed I would drop everything to fly to their weddings/birth of a child/fill in the blank, I have wished them well and carried on with my life. That might sound cold, but I have always put a lot in to my friendships and if there is a severe lack of balance or you end up feeling truly expendable then sometimes it's best to leave a relationship behind. Now, there are maybe three people left who I would consider true friends and for whom I would go above and beyond.

It is lonely and I feel your pain but maybe by the end of the transit you'll feel lighter? That's what I'm hoping for myself

---

I can totally see the similarities. Uranus would be a tough planet to transit the 11th also. I'm a very rigid person at times and despite being somewhat Uranian in my natal chart I have many Saturn aspects that speak of my Saturnine self that likes order so an 11th house Uranus would be a bummer. It's not fair of 'friends' to drop in and out like that but I can see so much how the relates to the bizarre and unexpected nature of Uranus. At the same time it's good of you not to fall into just playing along with it, maybe the positive of the transit for you was gaining independence!

posted January 16, 2013 06:51 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Doux Rêve:
Try having Saturn in the 11th natally.
Then we can talk !

No but really, it's just a transit.
Won't last a lifetime and you'll feel better after it's over.

Oh Saturn conjunct Venus will basically be about the same thing. When Saturn went over my Venus/Jupiter conjunction -twice- I was left with almost nobody around me but it felt good (in the end, cause while it lasted it was quite sad). Of course I had (and still have) my lonely moments but in the long run people who are "useless" don't belong in your life.. And solid friendships in my life have become even deeper, now I know the people I can count on. They must be like 2 or 3, but hey it's better than nothing!

Also.. take a good look at your expectations. Maybe you expect a bit too much from mere mortals. People can't always be what we want them to be, and while I understand it's difficult to find someone who truly understands you, supports you and is there for you, it's important to take it easy. Don't focus too much on deep friendships or life-altering encounters. Everyone has their own life and problems, so it's only normal that we're not always focused on relationships and other people.

Last thing. Most people don't want real friendship. They want social buddies to go out with and have fun with. So don't feel rejected or whatever, it's not you, it's them. Just try to relax and have fun by yourself, if no one is around.

Hang in there.

---

These are all great points...so much of this relates to me. I feel you touched on a lot of my issues too. Like just seeming to expect a lot of people to be as empathetic and sensative as I am when it's just not true...and family has said the same thing to me, how most people at my school are just looking for casual by the way side friends to hang with or go to parties and drink with and that is just not me. Pisces Saturn touches a lot of my personal planets and it has just made me a deeply emotional and intellectual person with many sensitivities so it deeply offends me that many people do not take life, friendship and love as seriously as I do.

Hopefully the Saturn-Venus-Jupiter conjunction will yield a more positive result, like acutally gaining something tangible out of my creativity for example, since I have Saturn trine these two planets in my natal anyway. Hence it might not be as traumatic or malefic for it to be happening as a transit which is a plus.

Thanks for reaching out and trying to make me feel better!

posted January 16, 2013 06:52 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by sweet-scorpion:
Thanks for reaching out to me aquaguy. As a matter of fact I do recall sometimes seeing you post here and talk about how tough it is sadly for you in the romance department about rejection and being alone, etc... I can also relate to you there. I have some difficult placements in my natal chart and had a really bad relationship recently, my love life is incredibly all or nothing even with the benefitial Jupiter-Venus conjunction, it just seems to pan out as me getting lots of gifts and money from people but as of right now no awesome or reliable partner in my life. Maybe because it trines Saturn it means it'll take some time to happen or when I meet older people it'll be more likely to happen. Maybe there's something similar like that in your case - I'm sure you have some good to combat the bad in your natal right? There's always hope. And as you said this is just a transit... it could be worse. My cousin has this in his natal chart, 11H Saturn, and is incredibly shy, it also squares his Sun.

---

posted January 16, 2013 06:54 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Nine:
Saturn in Scorpio is conjunct Uranus, natural ruler of the 11th house, and ruler of my natal 6th.

Yea, friendships in the workplace are definitely being tested. so sad when the ones I like show their true colors.

---

posted January 16, 2013 06:59 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by sweet-scorpion:
I can see how a H1 transit would be tough. I have a similar malefic 1st house progression/transit going on now, Pluto in my 1st house and as a young person it has been HELL on earth, literally... also square my Sun... and it's made me suicidal at points and brought out body dysmorphia in me. So I can see how a malefic transit is often enlightening but just sucks. I'm sure you'll make it through the transit though. I wish I could be like you and not give an eff about people. Well actually, I think maybe with this transit I'll learn how to care more about myself versus being way too much of a people pleaser. Might be a good thing.

---

You are beautiful.

It's weird coz I like to be popular but at the end of the day if it's not something I want to do. Idgaf.

posted January 16, 2013 10:31 PM            

"Don't you worry, don't you worry, child See heaven's got a plan for you
Don't you worry, don't you worry now"

posted January 16, 2013 10:36 PM            

I feel for you S-S. Saturn through the 11th was rough for me too. It went through my 11th when it went through Libra. I've always had plenty of friends since college (not in HS though- Natally I have Pluto in the 11th and I think that might have had something to do with it). However, I would say that the 11th house transit was the biggest clearing out of circles of friends I've had in a long while.

During the course of the transit, I had many different things happen... There was a period of 2 weeks in the middle of the transit in which I lost an entire group of friends- One weekend a close friend's new boyfriend groped me at a bar and she thought that she could love him enough to "change him" so she ditched me (we are 'friends' again, but only because that guy moved to another state and for the sake of our mutual friend). The very next weekend a group of my dancer friends that I used to hang out with ditched me in the middle of an unknown city because one of them wanted to get with one of the other women in the group who was married (I was the one driving everyone back to our hometown, so he figured he could ditch me and it would force her to stay overnight with him). Later on in the transit I became closer friends with an acquaintance, but as the transit wore on, the line between friendship/relationship got muddled and it ended VERY badly. And finally... The real kicker- in the last few months of the transit an old college friend of mine passed away suddenly (when Saturn was conjuncting my 11th house Pluto) and one of my closest friends got engaged (this happened in the same week in fact), and got married within a month and then moved to another state with her new husband.

So yeah... Saturn through the 11th really stripped away large chunks of my social groups all at once. Saturn is finally in my 12th house, and I'm STARTING to recover by meeting some new people and stringing together new little groups of friends here and there, but it's been tricky.

posted January 17, 2013 01:50 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Moonfish:

I think you feel like the friends you've been making are fake because as you mentioned the the connection is lighthearted and bland. This placement tends to have the need of building more serious friendships.

---

Right on! I have the placement too, and yes, it's all about serious connections. The frivolous need not apply.

posted January 17, 2013 11:59 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Moonfish:
I have this placement natally. It's definitely a downer for someone who wants a sociable lifestyle. Personally, having a watery chart this placement fits me because I love my alone time. The friends I do have are very mature for there age, like old souls.

I think you feel like the friends you've been making are fake because as you mentioned the the connection is lighthearted and bland. This placement tends to have the need of building more serious friendships.

---

I have this natally, too, and can say that I don't have many casual buds - I do have a number of close, loyal friends, though.

The transit may also be a time to cement "real" relationships with those who will stick with you.