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Author Topic:   Zodiac BumperStickers
Node
Knowflake

Posts: 77
From: Nov. 11 2005
Registered: Apr 2009

posted May 02, 2009 07:30 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Node     Edit/Delete Message
Found these again recently...
    Aries
  • Do NOT start with me
    You will NOT win
  • Get In — Sit Down —
    Shut Up — Hold On
      Taurus

  • TREE HUGGING DIRT WORSHIPPER
  • EARTH FIRST.
    We’ll strip mine the
    other planets later
      Gemini

  • I’M NOT TENSE…
    just terribly, terribly alert.
  • SARCASM
    IS JUST ONE MORE SERVICE WE OFFER
      Cancer

  • NEXT MOOD SWING…
    6 MINUTES
  • Who are these kids and
    why are they calling me Mom?
      Leo

  • I’m really easy to get along with, ONCE YOU PEOPLE LEARN TO WORSHIP ME
  • HERE I AM.
    Now what were your other
    two wishes?
      Virgo

  • A Clear Conscience is
    Sign of a Bad Memory
  • Don’t Believe
    Everything You Think
      Libra

  • WARNING
    Driver Applying Makeup
  • What’s POPULAR is not always right
    What’s Right is not always popular
      Scorpio

  • Control Your Destiny, or
    Someone Else Will
  • Don’t worry. It only seems
    kinky the first time.
      Sagittarius

  • And your crybaby whiny-assed opinion would be …?
  • Ahhh… I see the Screw-up
    Fairy has visited us again.
      Capricorn

  • ASSUME
    NOTHING
  • Of Course I Don’t Look Busy
    I Did it Right the First Time
      Aquarius

  • Chaos, Panic & Disorder..
    my work here is done
  • CHANGE IS INEVITABLE
    STRUGGLE IS AN OPTION
      Pisces

  • According to my calculations, the problem doesn’t exist
  • Reality is for people who lack
    IMAGINATION

    IP: Logged

  • PeaceAngel
    Moderator

    Posts: 365
    From: peace.angel@live.com.au
    Registered: Apr 2009

    posted May 02, 2009 07:33 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for PeaceAngel     Edit/Delete Message
    These are brilliant.

    Loved this one:

    quote:
    A Clear Conscience is Sign of a Bad Memory

    and of course, this one:

    quote:
    Do NOT start with me
    You will NOT win

    IP: Logged

    Node
    Knowflake

    Posts: 77
    From: Nov. 11 2005
    Registered: Apr 2009

    posted May 02, 2009 09:16 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Node     Edit/Delete Message
    I hold the feverish opinion that laughter is the best medicine, with that in mind posting the Non PC
      FLU SYMPTOMS of the ZODIAC.
    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    Aries is the first sign and therefore likely to get the flu before everyone else. Being a fire, Aries is likely to get a fever and hallucinate being in the intimate care of cute doctors and nubile candy stripers. It could be that what Aries has is not a cold, it's another case of spring fever.
    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    Taurus gets the flu and stays in bed feeling lethargic, but they do that anyway, so it's hard to tell when a Taurus is sick. Being the possessive type, when Taurians do catch colds, they refuse to share it. A Taurian sore throat can often be cured with cream brandy.


    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    Gemini rules the hands and arms, and is known for their good sense of humor. It's easy to spot a Gemini with the flu. They're the ones who are coughing and sneezing and waving their arms in the air. When there's someting funny going around, Gemini is sure to catch it.


    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    Cancer lucks out when it comes to the flu. Cancer rules the home, food and strong women. Whenever a Cancer gets the flu, a powerful, beautiful goddess type bring them miso soup, chicken noodle soup and the like.


    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    Leo is a proud and dramatic sign. When a Leo gets the flu it has to be worse than everyone else's. Leos make a big show of their ill condition.


    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    Virgo is the sign most concerned with health. Naturally Virgos are always fighting the flu with home remedies, enjoying herbal enemas and the like.


    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    Libra is the sign of partnership, and give and take. Libra catches a cold from their partner and then they give it back. Often they're stuck in an endless loop with a "love bug."


    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    Scorpio is a willful sign. They say, "I don't get colds," and they don't. They only get the most deadly flu viruses, and that's just to prove that it can't kill them. Since Scorpio rules the "secret parts," they're the ones most likely to make a game of checking with a rectal thermometer.


    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    Sagittarius is an international sign, most likely to catch the Hong Kong flu and other important strains. Being philosophical, they catch "travel bugs" and the flu at school where they're trying to "know it all."


    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    Capricorn is a serious and professional sign. When they catch the flu, they must see a doctor. Since Capricorn rules the knees, no physical exam is complete without the little hammer testing their reflexes.


    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    Aquarius is high tech and avant-garde. They prefer to catch computer viruses and flu symptoms that no one else has ever heard of.
    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    Pisces is a water sign and a bit of a martyr. When Pisces catches a cold, it features a prominent runny nose and a public display of suffering. If Pisceans insist on blaming themselves for getting sick, ask them if they need a good turn over the lap for an old-fashioned bare bottom spanking!

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    Node
    Knowflake

    Posts: 77
    From: Nov. 11 2005
    Registered: Apr 2009

    posted May 02, 2009 09:25 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Node     Edit/Delete Message
    also feverishly considering changing the Cappy. That knee imagery would be better served with something a little more dirty, as in getting those knees a little dirty...but hey, I have #4450 Pan conjunct Eros.

    IP: Logged

    Lara
    Knowflake

    Posts: 396
    From: aspideronmars
    Registered: Apr 2009

    posted May 02, 2009 08:29 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Lara     Edit/Delete Message
    Do NOT start with me
    You will NOT win


    HAHAHAHAHAHAHA THAT should be my LL bumper sticker

    hehe

    I love these!!! Thanks Node for bringing a smile to my really crappy day x

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    MyVirgoMask
    Knowflake

    Posts: 220
    From:
    Registered: May 2009

    posted May 03, 2009 11:17 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for MyVirgoMask     Edit/Delete Message
    Ewww, herbal enemas? LOL

    "A Clear Conscience is
    Sign of a Bad Memory."

    I'm thinking this is probably why I am feeling happier in general. My memory is failing

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    T
    Knowflake

    Posts: 268
    From:
    Registered: Apr 2009

    posted May 03, 2009 12:54 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for T     Edit/Delete Message
    Node, are you writing these? Absolutely brilliant!

    I especially love the flu funnies.

    Thanks for the laughs!

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    Azalaksh
    Moderator

    Posts: 79
    From: New Brighton, MN, USA
    Registered: Apr 2009

    posted May 03, 2009 01:51 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Azalaksh     Edit/Delete Message
    Loved this one!!
    quote:
    Scorpio is a willful sign . . . They only get the most deadly flu viruses, and that's just to prove that it can't kill them.

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    Node
    Knowflake

    Posts: 77
    From: Nov. 11 2005
    Registered: Apr 2009

    posted May 04, 2009 02:55 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Node     Edit/Delete Message
    Noo I didn't write either ^^_^^
      But I have started a Screen Savers by Sun Sign if any one would like to contribute....
    • Aries has the current Pontiff on the Vatican balcony. His right hand is covered with a big, foam, #1, like the ones used at sporting events.
    • Taurus - has a photo shopped pic of the HGTV (Home and Garden Television) *Green* Home. Their last name has been written on the mailbox. In Pink.
    • Sunny Leo- has the MGM Lion in Mid roar....he/she have always kinda liked that cat.
    • Aquarius- The electric Aquarian has an antique black light poster from the 60's. Bordered with Neon it features the sexual positions most preferred by each sun sign. After all he/she has done them all, and would know.

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    GypseeWind
    Knowflake

    Posts: 66
    From: Dayton,Ohio USA
    Registered: May 2009

    posted May 12, 2009 09:45 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for GypseeWind     Edit/Delete Message
    Very funny! printed these for my "fridge humor" My personal bummer stickers say, "What would Scooby Do", "My other car is a broom" and my personal fave, "Don't make me get my flying monkeys." Riddle me this, if sag gets the rap for being A Know It All, then why are people always asking us so dang many questions? Don't they realize that we can`t not anser them??!!??

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    Coffee
    Knowflake

    Posts: 312
    From: Leeds
    Registered: Apr 2009

    posted May 12, 2009 10:51 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Coffee     Edit/Delete Message
    What would Scooby do?


    That is good!

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    GypseeWind
    Knowflake

    Posts: 66
    From: Dayton,Ohio USA
    Registered: May 2009

    posted May 15, 2009 10:37 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for GypseeWind     Edit/Delete Message
    Thanks Coffee;
    I just realized I typed "bummer" stickers instead of "bumper" stickers. lol. It is a bummer that I got drive that car though, so maybe its not a typo!

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