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Author Topic:   On the Effect of Labelling
pire
Knowflake

Posts: 918
From:
Registered: Apr 2009

posted November 05, 2009 03:58 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for pire     Edit/Delete Message
"you are this"

no! i'm not this; i am more. i am also this and that. and u can't see it because u have a partial view of me, your zoom is out of focus.

when we label someone, we give them a luggage to carry.

who's able to define someone in its entirety?

the result of this is dramatic; we make other become someone else. we all do this sometimes, and without noticing. i do it often and try to work on it; it is what it is, bad often, good sometimes. we are all good and bad. so let's not dwell too much on others bad because we refuse to acknowledge our own darkness.

welcome to my world of contradictions.

ps: bm, this doesn't apply to the kind words you've told me. i've got room for this kind of luggages

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blue moon
Knowflake

Posts: 1133
From: U.K
Registered: Apr 2009

posted November 05, 2009 06:06 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for blue moon     Edit/Delete Message
You are a naughty boy.

Not you Pire, I mean kids who get into trouble in their pre-teen years. They get slapped with the trouble-maker label and it is down hill from then on.

There is more than one boy in town I could think of who has problems at home, sometimes from something that has happened in their life, an emotional trauma, and it doesn't get addressed. You can see it in their eyes, feel it off them, whatever. I know a couple of boys like this that have played at my house, they are fine if you give them a chance. But at school there are problems and it gives them a bad name around town.

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DD
Knowflake

Posts: 1977
From:
Registered: Apr 2009

posted November 05, 2009 06:21 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for DD     Edit/Delete Message
Pire,

I agree completely with you. I hate that labelling. And yet I know I am not without sin in this regard. But I try to stay alert to the danger that I might do it myself.
I don`t want to be labelled (or judged), so I am trying not to do this to others.

Is that an Aquarian thing? Or just basically a human thing?

Oh and I am seriously allergic against people who tell me HOW I REALLY AM.

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Yin
Knowflake

Posts: 835
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Registered: Apr 2009

posted November 05, 2009 09:36 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Yin     Edit/Delete Message
DD, what if I told you that you are REALLY Sagittarian?

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DD
Knowflake

Posts: 1977
From:
Registered: Apr 2009

posted November 05, 2009 09:48 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for DD     Edit/Delete Message
Yin,

I would be happy to hear this. Especially with 4 planets and NN and ASC in Sagittarius.

You are one, too, aren`t you?

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Yin
Knowflake

Posts: 835
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Registered: Apr 2009

posted November 05, 2009 09:52 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Yin     Edit/Delete Message
Yes, ma'am, I am.

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T
Moderator

Posts: 1714
From:
Registered: Apr 2009

posted November 06, 2009 11:22 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for T     Edit/Delete Message
Nice thoughts pire.

just wanted to say:

quote:
when we label someone, we give them a luggage to carry.

Only if they decide to pick it up, right?

quote:
who's able to define someone in its entirety?

No one. We are all so complex and don't even know ourselves, let alone have good gists of another.

quote:
welcome to my world of contradictions.

Something we all struggle with. Then eventually give up that struggle or become comfortable with it because you really cant escape all the contradictions.

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katatonic
Knowflake

Posts: 2458
From:
Registered: Apr 2009

posted November 06, 2009 01:26 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for katatonic     Edit/Delete Message
it's true that the baggage has to be picked up but following on BM's post, it is often handed to you as a VERY young child who knows no better...teachers who go out of their way to make kids conform in the early grades, and convince even good kids who are trying hard that they must be somehow BAD KIDS because they are always being scolded...sometimes for no reason other than the teacher has a headache (or parent) which the child may or may not have the antennae to notice. this forms a core self-criticism that can snowball as we get older into a whole crateful of "baggage" (not luggage in english, pire!) that is so deeply planted we aren't even aware of it. insidious.

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Valus
Knowflake

Posts: 1702
From:
Registered: Apr 2009

posted November 08, 2009 09:09 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Valus     Edit/Delete Message

Contradictions...

When we are feeling good,
they make life interesting;
they are exciting, inspiring,
intriguing little mysteries.
We play with them, turn them over,
and discover more contradictions.
We learn to avoid some mistakes,
and we rush headlong into others.
But its all endlessly fascinating,
fodder for a million dazzling poems,
when you're in a good mood.

When you are in a bad mood, well,
then contradiction is the bane of life.
It's the overwhelming chaos that comes
rushing in on you like a river of bricks,
while you're building a dam out of bricks.
There's no way to stay ahead of it, and
no way to abandon yourself to the chaos.
It's just this absurd Charlie Chaplin skit,
when you're in a bad mood.

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Valus
Knowflake

Posts: 1702
From:
Registered: Apr 2009

posted November 08, 2009 09:26 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Valus     Edit/Delete Message
quote:

quote:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
when we label someone, we give them a luggage to carry.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Only if they decide to pick it up, right?


Oh, God, if only that were true.

For me, I mean.

Maybe its true for you.

But I don't have to pick it up.

Not with my hands, I mean.

I pick sh-t up with my antennae,
and have the damndest time trying
to find a station without static,
or railing disk jockeys who think
they can cut through all the BS
just by delivering a harsh word
of censure or condemnation.

I wish I had boundaries.

The kind that so many seem to have.

I have other kinds of boundaries.
I manage not to "pick up" lots of ideas
that spin around the culture like sleet
and stick to lots of unsuspecting types.

Yeah, I labelled them unsuspecting,
and I even think I know who they are.

But I'd love to have the boundaries
that cause stones to roll off my back.
Instead, I seem to attract them.

A stone thrown anywhere in my remote direction,
or even a stone thrown in the opposite direction,
but directed (by intent) at me, will hit its mark.

I'm just sensitive in that way.

And its tempted me, so many times,
to leave civilization, or the planet,
in search of a more congenial environment.

Or just to sit up in my room,
and not even deal with the world
through the medium of this computer.

Funny how that just makes me a target.

People don't understand anything.

Especially sensitivity.

F-ck people.

F-ck judgements.

F-ck self-proclaimed judges
who think they can cut through
all the "nonsense" responsible
for my condition and way of being
with a few intolerant words.

May they never have to know
what its like to be me,
listening to them.

I know you're not one of them, T.
Sorry to sort of direct this to you,
I was just responding to your comment
and sort of went off on a roll.

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T
Moderator

Posts: 1714
From:
Registered: Apr 2009

posted November 08, 2009 01:01 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for T     Edit/Delete Message
Valus, I hear you. Being an extremely sensitive individual you have to work on developing boundaries though. You cant just wish for them. Otherwise you leave yourself exposed to constantly being attacked, hurt and drained of your energy. It's healthy to work at building up a strong or protective energy field. Otherwise you will continue to let others have control over you. This is something empaths tend to have a problem with - open energy fields, where they lose themselves and let another influence them too much.

That doesnt mean you have to become any less sensitive or you have to turn your antennaes off completely. It just means you are deciding that it's time to respect and protect your own self and energy field and mind. You are choosing who can manipulate you and your emotions or not. It takes practice especially when you are not used to caring for yourself or think that there is something wrong with that. Or that in doing so, you can no longer care for others.

I know the kind of sensitivity or vulnerability you are speaking of and if I hadnt put into practice some healthy psychic protective measures, I wouldve been dead a long time ago. I'm still not there and have to work on these things daily. I'm just saying, this is something that takes practice on your part. It's about loving and respecting yourself, because as you know, others wont always do that.

It makes you more sensitive in the fact that you can see what others are doing and why they throw the stones they do. They are sensitive too, but sometimes take it out in a nasty way. You should try to start defining these things for yourself, finding out who owns what and not accepting what is not yours. People will continue to control your emotions if you let them. Know and love yourself and their stones will miss their mark.

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T
Moderator

Posts: 1714
From:
Registered: Apr 2009

posted November 08, 2009 01:04 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for T     Edit/Delete Message
What you said about contradictions, i agree with.

I liked this part:

quote:
It's just this absurd Charlie Chaplin skit,
when you're in a bad mood.

Even when youre in a good mood, it often looks that way, i think.

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Valus
Knowflake

Posts: 1702
From:
Registered: Apr 2009

posted November 09, 2009 12:57 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Valus     Edit/Delete Message

Thanks, T.

I agree with everything you said and I appreciate you taking the time to say it, and to say it so well. I've been learning the lessons you allude to all my life and more intensively lately. I'm not sure if I'm ever meant to establish firm boundaries, or if I'm just meant to do my best, while I'm here. Establishing boundaries really may be an impossible task, for me. If the best I can do is flex my ego's muscles, so it doesn't dissolve into the collective, that may be enough to get me through and on to the next level in my development. If that's even how it works.

quote:
Even when youre in a good mood, it often looks that way, i think.

Yeah, I was thinking that.

Its a Chaplin skit when its good.

When its bad its a Chaplin skit
directed by David Lynch.

For me, at least.

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T
Moderator

Posts: 1714
From:
Registered: Apr 2009

posted November 10, 2009 12:31 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for T     Edit/Delete Message

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