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Author Topic:   Why are so many teenagers so wrapped up in trying to be cool?
aquaguy91
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From: Uranus
Registered: Jan 2012

posted October 27, 2014 05:53 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for aquaguy91     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I ask this because my niece is at that age and i'm seeing myself in her behavior and taking a trip down memory lane. She has been in the band since she was in the 6th grade and has enjoyed it (she's in 8th grade now) but says she doesn't plan to join the band in high school because it isn't cool. It makes me sad because I kind of sold out for popularity during my teenage years and it got me nowhere. I think most teens feel that pressure to be cool. Heck I gave into the pressure more than I liked and I'm a double aquarius. So my question is why are teens so wrapped up in being cool instead of being true to themselves and having fun? Youth truly is wasted on the young...

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deepseablues
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Posts: 328
From: the ocean floor
Registered: Jan 2014

posted October 27, 2014 06:22 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for deepseablues     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
One short simple word sums it all up: brainwashing (media). Youth are the easiest to brainwash. Plus they want to fit in, be considered good looking etc. Plus they aren't taught how to understand themselves. Astrology among other things are things we should be teaching in school.

"Youth are easy to decieve because they are quick to hope."

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PixieJane
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From: CA
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posted October 27, 2014 08:58 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for PixieJane     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I found one explanation plausible in that most people are born with tribal circuits (this is what makes people patriotic, sports fans, religious zealots, racists, and the like--it's not always a bad thing, mind you, nor does it mean that one is ALL of these things, people define their "tribes" in various ways) and that adolescence is the time when kids feel an instinctive need to become their own person. Back in the stone age (and in plenty of societies since then) becoming one's own person meant becoming a member of a TRIBE which was crucial to literal survival. And therefore the brain at an instinctive level is trying to assert themselves (be cool) while at the same time not trying to alienate their tribe, because to be shunned equals being condemned to death (so say the instincts, the same one that says "breed, breed, breed" which are powerful). That is, fitting in and being cool is understood subconsciously as a literal matter of life and death which is why it's such a big deal to them (and it shows!) and why they constantly feel eyes on them judging them.

'Course many eyes ARE on them, both kids and adults, and some of them wield a lot of power to help or harm so it's not like the instincts are always wrong even in this relatively enlightened age.

That said, such tribal instincts can be very weak in some people and they won't care, or they may already associate with another tribe outside their age group which means they won't demonstrate the same behavior as their peers.

As for me, I learned at 5 that no matter how messed up the world I could survive, and I think that was a huge help in being myself. Even so, I watched my step because adults had a lot of power over me which was sometimes a very bad thing, and a traumatic episode with bullies when I was 13 also made me want to avoid pushing too many too far with my strange ways (as well as to brutally crush any attempt to bully me). I think it helped that no matter how shunned I was by the majority I still had close friends. I did make a few bad decisions back then because I let others convince me to go against myself (and also to keep things to myself because I didn't want the adults interfering, at least not ones I didn't respect which was most of them) but I learned my lesson at 15 over a huge mistake and stopped doing that.

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Randall
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From: Saturn next to Charmainec
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posted October 29, 2014 10:34 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Randall     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Immaturity.

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Lonake
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posted October 29, 2014 10:45 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Lonake     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Because their peers are the world to them and they want to be accepted by the group. Completely normal for that age. Then somewhere in the teens there might be a bit of rebellion as the personality individuates from the herd, if they're strong enough or if they're under too tight of a restriction. The more they seem bonded to/respected by their parents, the less the rebellion seems to be a problem.

Now if they are 40 and acting like that? Hmm! Lol, not good.

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Ami Anne
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From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010

posted October 30, 2014 04:38 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Ami Anne     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Randall:
Immaturity.

One word answer

However, it is hard to buck the crowd at any age. True leaders are rare.

------------------
Want To Ask Any Question About Bible Prophecy? Go For it. It is Free, of course.


http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/

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Randall
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From: Saturn next to Charmainec
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posted October 31, 2014 05:06 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Randall     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Yep, peer pressure.

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