posted July 11, 2004 08:33 AM
Virgo -I'm not sure how you are accustomed to being spoken to after you've expressed your feelings. Perhaps you expect total rejection. Perhaps you think that someone who doesn't reject you is an idiot for not being able to see all those negative sides of you, which everyone is bound to notice sooner or later.
If you were my child and you were writing me this letter, "from summer camp", I would tell you that you do not have the temperament to live this lifestyle. It does not mean that you are not talented, it just means that you don't have that thick skin required to go on all those auditions and be rejected by 85% of them. That would be difficult for anyone, and people who are big into acting happen to have big ego's because it is the reason why they hang in there.
I've wanted to do many things for which I did not have the temperament. Like studying architecture, only to find I did not have the temperament to sit and draw on a desk all day. Or wanting to be a police officer, or teacher, etc.
Where is the law written that you have to have everything figured out on the first try? Life is a journey, and you are a mutable sign, which will make it easier for you to adjust. Imagine someone who has a Sun, Moon, Asc, and Mars all in Cardinal signs... It is more difficult for them to adapt, and in the end, it's a hard lesson for them too.
Are you judgemental towards others? Do you hate them simply because of the way their hair looks? If their face is not perfect, do you hate them? Or do you find beauty in everything? Have a little more faith in people and give them a chance to show their true selves to you. Help them open up. You will see that many people find beauty in everything.
When you are young, you will learn that a lot of things look good on paper, but that the actual process involves unexpected sacrifices. Be humble in your explorations.
I have a Venus & Pluto Conjunct in Virgo, plus 3 planets in my 6th House. So I do know how difficult it is to feel like you've been duped. Virgo's tend to be quite naive and overly trusting. Just bring it down a notch, so your expectations are a little more realistic. You don't have to start all over again, just take what you've learned, and move on. Certain things no one will be able to take away from you.
If you have a ton of thoughts you need to get out, try to find outlets, but don't put such an emphasis on having to "fix" things about yourself because THAT process would never end for ANY of us!
Things you may think only YOU are experiencing is really being experienced simultaneously by many other people in the world. So don't single yourself out. Practice taking things day by day, and expect that like everyone else, you WILL have bad days and bad experiences in life. You will also have good days and experiences. The purpose for life is not "to get things right" - it is to learn and evolve, every day, for the rest of your life. So get used to it... accept it. The more you try to fight it, the worse you will feel.
.gloria
------------------
it's better to light a candle than curse the darkness...