posted October 05, 2004 06:56 PM              

"THE GOOD MATE"

These types care, and that’s what makes their lives worth living. You won’t find anyone more loving, more solicitous of you, more concerned for your needs and feelings or for those of the group as a whole. At their best, such individuals are the loyal, considerate, ever-so-helpful players on the team -- whether it is the couple, the family, the assembly line, the department, the religious or charitable organization, or the military unit. Their needs are those of the group or of its leader, and their happiness comes from the fulfillment of the others’ directives and goals. These people are the ones who tell you, "I’m happy if you’re happy" -- and mean it.
This style is common in our society, and it occurs among both men and women. Traditionally this helping and giving personality style has been particularly encouraged and approved among women. The customary view of the good wife has been that of a tender-hearted woman who lives through her husband and relies on him to make the worldly decisions for her, while she dedicates herself to providing a fulfilling home life for the family. As views of women’s roles change in this society, some women with this personality style may have mixed feelings about expressing it. Because of today’s cultural pressures on women to step out of the shadows of other people, both in and out of the home, they may feel that wanting to make someone else happy is something to be ashamed of. While these women struggle to come to terms with all sides of their personality patterns, more men are feeling freer to enjoy their own domestic, nurturing tendencies. In any case, as we will see throughout this chapter, this personality plays itself out in many ways in the personality profiles of males as well as females, traditional and otherwise.

THE SEVEN CHARACTERISTICS

1. Commitment. Individuals with this personality style are thoroughly dedicated to the relationships in their lives. They place the highest value on sustained relationships, they respect the institution of marriage as well as unofficial avowals of commitment, and they work hard to keep their relationships together.

2. Togetherness. They prefer the company of one or more people to being alone.

3, Teamwork. People with this personality style would rather follow than lead. They are cooperative and respectful of authority and institutions. They easily rely on others and take direction well.

4. Deference. When making decisions, they are happy to seek out others’ opinions and to follow their advice.

5. Harmony. These individuals are careful to promote good feelings between themselves and the important people in their lives. To promote harmony, they tend to be polite, agreeable, and tactful.

6 . Consideration. They are thoughtful of others and good at pleasing them. These people will endure personal discomfort to do a good turn for the key people in their lives.

posted October 05, 2004 08:20 PM              

Virgos are people pleasers....hard workers, work well with everyone, always trying to keep the peace, not strongly opinionated as they can usually see both sides to things. In relationships, they are very commited and very attentative, paying attention to even the smallest of details. They usually hate to be the center of attention, would much rather be a boss's right hand, then being a boss themselves.

posted October 05, 2004 09:39 PM              

But I also could say Leo, because Leos are very committed and devoted once they set their hearts on someone.

An Aquarian with a Cancer signature will be loyal and committed, but not likely to follow. Ask any strong willed woman who has dated an Aquarian, he does what he wants.

Sags, Capricorns, Scorpios have a strong interest in forming relationships, I would say Libra except that Libras are not followers.

Taurus is very devoted and thoughtful, but not very good at promoting harmony until much later in life. We can be pretty blunt.

Is there an answer?

posted October 05, 2004 09:52 PM              

So far, it seems to be striking everyone as either Cancerian or Virginian... with a nod to Libra...

posted October 05, 2004 10:03 PM              

They love it when everyone is HAPPY! Usually very considerate...seek others opinions as they are never so sure of their own....They really like Harmony...it is truly a very helping and giving sign...and they are OK in the background (vs leading but can do both).

Cancer is not a bad guess ...I think however, the quality of the defering to other's opinions gave it away to Pisces in my eyes...sometimes I am not so sure that Cancer 'promotes' harmony...I have two younger brothers who are Cancer and harmony, while important, is not usually something that they themselves promote.

posted October 05, 2004 11:27 PM              

I was thinking along the lines of Cancer also. But I dont believe it to be a Cancer because Cancers (and water signs in general) can be needy....moody. And although what is being described here, talks of 'needs' and 'nurturing', these keywords do not only apply to Cancers. And a Cancer is not the type to say, "I'm happy if you're happy", they are emotional creatures being ruled by the moon. Their own happiness does not happen because of other people's. They are at the mercy of the Moon and it's constant changes. Moody Cancers dont care if you are happy. They are too involved in their own emotions. Now, dont get all crabby on me, Cancers. I know, you are loving, caring and nurturing too. But the way it is being described here screams "Earth Sign" to me. Keywords being: Loyal, considerate, helpful, dedicated, cooperative, respectful, enduring......
The above, is speaking of needing to be needed...needing to help others. Where a Cancer needs to be needed in a 'needier' way. Needs things from another. Likes to nurture but in a different way and for different reasons.

I also thought it must be one of the fixed signs. But changed my mind and decided it has to be Virgo for these reasons.

"The Good(Virgo) Mate"
These types care, and that’s what makes their lives worth living. (First sentence - totally Virgo. Virgos were born to caretake and serve. It is what makes them happiest, taking care of others.) You won’t find anyone more loving, more solicitous of you, more concerned for your needs and feelings or for those of the group as a whole. At their best, such individuals are the loyal, considerate, ever-so-helpful players

..."They prefer the company of one or more people to being alone."
Having friends and loved ones around tends to bring out the best in a lot of Virgos. Their ruling planet being Mercury, they like to communicate and interact with others. But they can be very critical and do not take critisism aimed at them well.

..."People with this personality style would rather follow than lead. They are cooperative and respectful of authority and institutions. They easily rely on others and take direction well."
Leave the "leading" to the Cardinal signs. The Mutable ones are adaptable, resourseful and seek synthesis.

..."polite, agreeable, and tactful."
That's Virgo! 'Ms.(Mr.) Manners'.

..."They are thoughtful (earth signs) of others and good at pleasing them (Virgo). These people will endure personal discomfort to do a good turn for the key people in their lives. (Virgo again )

..."Relationships provide life’s meaning for this personality style."
Serving, and being there in anyway they can for others, makes it all worth while for this sign.

I also find that there is kind of Pisces sound to the theme here. Which I dont find very surprising. Pisces is opposite Virgo. I tend to find alot of simiarities in each pair of opposing signs. A mirroring effect. Different approches to similar tendencies???