posted November 11, 2004 11:44 PM              

Here's his stuff:

Sun Aquarius
Moon Aquarius
Mercury Aquarius
Venus Aquarius
Mars Sagittarius
Jupiter Aquarius
Saturn Sagittarius
Uranus Sagittarius
Neptune Capricorn
Pluto Scorpio
True Node Taurus

Now, he's young. There's plenty of time for him to turn his life around... but I'm worried.

Many of you know the story of my mother, so that explains why he's so depressed.

He doesn't express any feelings... not happy ones, sad ones, especially not angry ones.

What can I do? I've been like my brother and sister's mother since they were both born. In some ways, I feel like I'm failing him by doing nothing

posted November 11, 2004 11:46 PM              

The reason I am so worried is because he is SO capable. He's a genius... quite literally. His mind is absolutely brilliant. He could be/do anything... something amazing.

posted November 12, 2004 12:11 AM              

He's a computer genius, and likes to sit all day playing with anima and games. Perfect!

There's a school called DigiPen, where he can go to learn to MAKE and ANIMATE those computer games he loves so much.

He can turn his obsession into $$$. (And I mean a LOT of $$$)

Good thing he's a genius, 'cause he'll need it at that school.

posted November 12, 2004 12:31 AM              

I'll google it.

Thanks

*edit*

posted November 12, 2004 12:45 AM              

computers are obviously the best choice for him.

edited to add*

posted November 12, 2004 12:49 AM              

Planetary positions
Sun Aquarius 20°39'13 11 direct
Moon Aquarius 29°07'59 12 direct
Mercury Aquarius 27°14'50 11/12 direct
Mercury is technically near the end of house 11 and is interpreted in house 12.
Venus Aquarius 25°42'29 11 direct
Mars Sagittarius 04°22'27 08 direct
Jupiter Aquarius 27°22'05 11/12 direct
Jupiter is technically near the end of house 11 and is interpreted in house 12.
Saturn Sagittarius 08°31'50 08 direct
Uranus Sagittarius 21°28'07 09 direct
Neptune Capricorn 04°56'49 09/10 direct
Neptune is technically near the end of house 9 and is interpreted in house 10.
Pluto Scorpio 07°21'45 07 stationary (R)
True Node Taurus 02°42'37 01 retrograde

posted November 12, 2004 01:19 AM              

He lives his life in a very monotone fashion.

posted November 12, 2004 04:56 AM              

The first thing I thought was "Wow, look at all that Aquarius. No wonder he loves computers." He really should look into making a living or going to school for something in the computer field. Maybe graphic design, or that DigiPen that was mentioned. He has a lot of options.

BUT, I will say that if he isnt motivated to do it, there is not much you can do for him except be there for him in encouraging ways.

I know about this firsthand because I went through it for years (still do) with my own brother. He's about a year and a half younger than me and one of my most favorite people on this planet. I watched him go way down the tubes and not give a sh!t about anything. At 18 he was a convicted felon. He started getting into trouble at 14 and it hasnt stopped since - it just got progressively worse. In and out of detention centers and then in and out of jail. It really pained me to see this person I know so well F*** his life up so bad. SO, so, so smart, but did the most stupid things. It was extremely sad and baffling, to say the least. Major drug addict. I'm suprised he's still alive.

I did everything I could. It really brought me down for many years. I went through some major depression about it. I had a hard time getting it through my head that no matter what I did for him, he would only change when he wanted to or was ready to. I would help him out - or as my mom said "enable" him - and he would walk all over me, get all he could out of me and dissapear. Only to come back when he needed something or had nowhere else to go. I know he loves me, but he's just really f-ed up now and treats people like sh*t. Blames all of his problems on everyone else. It's never his fault.

He is now back in jail. (I found out last week.) He was awaiting trial for getting caught with a sh!tload of heroin and some other stuff and intent to sell, possesion of a gun. And he got himself in trouble AGAIN and has landed himself in jail. It's really serious this time and I think he'll be away for awhile.

I've come to the realization that you really can't do it for anyone else. As sad as that is. There are many ways you can help them out but they have to want to make the change. You have to be careful not to let it drag you down and realize that everyone is on their own path. Not to say, there is NOTHING you can do, but there has to be a certain amount of detatchment there.

Sorry I just rambled on. I know this is a whole different situation than your brother but similar in certain ways. It's soooo hard to watch the people you love go down the drain. And frustrating when you cant help or change them. My heart goes out to you and him.

I'd make some suggestions about doing something with computers to him. Have a heart to heart. Good luck. Love to you both.

26

posted November 12, 2004 07:26 AM              

My description of AS there isn't exhaustive and it's written more for women (since I was replying to a woman), but if you were to post the same descript of your bother at an AS forum, I assure you you'd get a slew of replys from guys going "Yeah, I am/I was just like that!" AS is sometimes called the "Geek Syndrome" because a lot of Aspies, especially of the younger generation, are into "geeky" things like computers and RPGs, tend to be uberobsessed on such narrow interests (we call it "hyperfocused"), and seem to lack anything what "normal" people would call a "real life" (ie, friends, goals, awareness that there's a world out there, so forth). In general Aspies have above average to genuis IQs, are most interested in things and information rather than in people or socialzing, and seem to lack the social skills they need to live a normally productive life, among other things.

Here's something from a AS/autism article that appears in Wired magazine ( http://www.wired.com/wired/archive/9.12/aspergers_pr.html ) :

"Nick is building a universe on his computer. He's already mapped out his first planet: an anvil-shaped world called Denthaim that is home to gnomes and gods, along with a three-gendered race known as kiman. As he tells me about his universe, Nick looks up at the ceiling, humming fragments of a melody over and over. "I'm thinking of making magic a form of quantum physics, but I haven't decided yet, actually," he explains. The music of his speech is pitched high, alternately poetic and pedantic - as if the soul of an Oxford don has been awkwardly reincarnated in the body of a chubby, rosy-cheeked boy from Silicon Valley. Nick is 11 years old.

Nick's father is a software engineer, and his mother is a computer programmer. They've known that Nick was an unusual child for a long time. He's infatuated with fantasy novels, but he has a hard time reading people. Clearly bright and imaginative, he has no friends his own age. His inability to pick up on hidden agendas makes him easy prey to certain cruelties, as when some kids paid him a few dollars to wear a ridiculous outfit to school.

One therapist suggested that Nick was suffering from an anxiety disorder. Another said he had a speech impediment. Then his mother read a book called Asperger's Syndrome: A Guide for Parents and Professionals. In it, psychologist Tony Attwood describes children who lack basic social and motor skills, seem unable to decode body language and sense the feelings of others, avoid eye contact, and frequently launch into monologues about narrowly defined - and often highly technical - interests. Even when very young, these children become obsessed with order, arranging their toys in a regimented fashion on the floor and flying into tantrums when their routines are disturbed. As teenagers, they're prone to getting into trouble with teachers and other figures of authority, partly because the subtle cues that define societal hierarchies are invisible to them...."

Now this is only one example of someone with AS - the severity and specific traits varies from person to person, but there are very clear commonalities.

Also, people with AS (like people with ADD or ADHD) may also have EFD (Executive Function Disorder). This effects a person's ability to set goals, follow through with plans or tackle/resolve complicated problems, and cope with frustration and setbacks. Here's the link I posted before about that: http://mywebpages.comcast.net/kskkight/EFD.htm

If your brother has AS, or ADD or another similar condition, it's neurological, so he can't be "fixed." It's not a question of will power or even genuinely about a lack of motivation - he may in fact want to do many things, but simply doesn't know what to do to overcome the obstacles he is facing (he may even be aware of some level that he has a problem like this, but is convince you and others around him won't believe it, as it the case with many AS and ADD people). He may be concurrently suffering from depression, as many AS/ADD people do, which isn't about will power to motivation either, but a very real illness.

He's different, but not defective, but he may be feeling like he is and may have been getting that signal for others all his life. He needs support and understanding, and he needs to learn about what makes him different from others so he doesn't just assume he's a useless f*ck-up and give up on themselves like many people in his situation do. He needs to learn the right living skills to help him cope with this. Having these conditions aren't the end of the world - people with AS are very capable of living productive and happy lives, if they understand they own needs and limitations.

posted November 12, 2004 08:26 AM              

Aquas also love to be asked what they are thinking, but it doesn't mean they will give the answer you want.

I still love my little brother, but he has a lot of shortcomings in that when he does try to be popular he ignores his family totally.
So it could be worse, he could be with the wrong crowd, right now he is just being with himself, maybe it takes him a year or two to figure out what phase he's in?

I have noticed us fixed signs take a long time to decide on anything, especially as teenagers. I was very much into doing my thing, as a teenager, and that's where my mother and I split, since she was a clinger.

If he meets up with a Scorpio woman, he may fall in love. Scorpios have a way with Aquas, Scorpios, Taureans and Leos.

posted November 12, 2004 12:59 PM              

Thanks for your kind words. It's very hard to deal with, isnt it?

Oh, one thing my brother isnt an Aquarius. He's a Sag Sun and Moon with a Leo Rising. Neptune conjunct Moon (and Sun), and a whole slew of planets in Virgo. Mars and Jupiter in Virgo conjunct in the first.....

The strange thing is, he doesnt seem at all like a typical double Sag with a Leo rising would be. This may have something to do with every single planet and asteroid in his chart (except Chiron conj. MC) being on the bottom half, or "below the horizon". He definitely lives up to the Sag/Leo part of his chart but is also very untypical of those signs in many other ways.

I dont know, very tough to figure out.

Sorry to hear about your brother Natasha. Hopefully his situation improves.

Light to you both.

Gemini,

posted November 12, 2004 01:19 PM              

I've got a splitting head ache and an ear ache... not to mention another nagging, hacking cough.

I'm going to lay (k... maybe not LAY, but lie in bed )in bed all day and read.

I'll be back to give a more detailed response later.

26, GN, Nat ~ Thanks so much. You've all given me a lot to think about... and respond to.

posted November 12, 2004 02:45 PM              

From info I've gotten about, plus my personal observation - you MAY (emphasis) be enabling him if he is interested in only wealthy women.

posted November 13, 2004 10:13 PM              

I haven't read about your mother, so I don't know what's on your kid brother's mind...my astrological knowledge, frankally speaking, has not yet reached the higher level. But after having read your brother's horoscope, I've got some ideas:

He has heavy Aquarian influences, including the sun and the moon, which make him, as Linda said, "the combination of genius and insanity", "difficult to approach". He may have problems expressing his emotions due to his Aquarian sun, moon and Venus combination. His Mercury is also in Aquarius, which is in the rising position, that is to say, he must be very talented. He just needs to realize his potential. He has two planets in the 12th house, which is not a very good sign- he tends to isolate himself (I hope this can be changed). Both his Mars and Saturn are in the 8th house, a significant position (especially Mars in this case)- my assumption is he has tremendous hidden energy (perhaps sexual energy) and he needs to use it the right way. Maybe if he gets involved in a good relationship will help, but judging by his planetary influences, he seems to be a loner and is not likely to do so or have done so for a while at least. Am I right?

As a fellow knowflake pointed out, his Pluto squares his sun, moon, Mercury, Venus and Jupiter, another not-so-prosperous indication...his Pluto is in the 7th house, again, it's a significant position. The 7th house rules marriage and partnership. This is definitely a powerful position, but whether it's a positive one or a negative one, I'm sorry to say- I'm not sure. Pluto is about transformation and revolution. Anyway, bear in mind this position has a deep meaning for him.

Indeed, as another knowflake said, no water signs in his natal chart. And there is too much air element, particularly when it's all about Aquarius. Sounds like you've been trying to reach out for him but to no avail. What happened to your mother? Would you mind letting me know so I can understand a little more about why your brother is depressed? Did he use to be a very different person? Or he changed after what took place?

As others remarked, he can use his IT skills and I think he can become pretty good in this field, since this is his interest. This also, in a way, relates to the sign Aquarius (I'm not saying all Aquarians are good at comps, there are the typical ones and the not-so-typical ones, depending on their complete planetary influences). A serious relationship would help, in my opinion. Although it may be still too early for him to think about marriage. That's the tricky part- I'm not certain if his horoscope indicates there are afflictions about his love life and marriage. The bottom line is, I agree with Gemini Nymph- it would be a good idea to get him go see a psychotherapist. You know, seeking professional help. The sooner the better. It may be hard to make him agree to do that as Aquarius is a fixed sign (stubborn), but it seems to be the only way out. Don't let him waste himself away and break your hearts. It's not his fault, it's not your fault, he just needs help. I'm sending loads of love, light and warmth to you and him

posted November 14, 2004 02:53 PM              

Talked to him about the school, and he's apparently already explored that option. They told him entrance depends on GPA. He's an intelligent person, but he's failing most of his classes, and the rest of his grades are really nothing to brag about. We had a nice conversation though. He told me his plans and they sound very good. There's an alternative HS in a neighboring town that he can go to next year, his education will be more individualized. He eventually wants to be a journalist/novelist, and has planned out 6 years of school to do it. Here's hoping he does it

26,

Your brother sounds a lot like my mama. She's been in and out of jail for the past 5 or so years. She's locked up right now. I tried for a really long time to "fix" my mom... finally realized I couldn't and let go. Then I got angry. I went through a period of hate... How could you do this to your children?! You evil [insert any vulgar effeminate adjective you please, I probably thought/said it]." That was an awful phase. I much prefer to be a happy fun person. It's a huge struggle to be that way and hate at the same time... So I let that go. Which basically brings us up to date. I'm pretty much at detachment now with my mom... empathetic detachment. I guess the phase I'm in now is, "Can you imagine what it must be like in her head?".

GN,

Thanks so much! I will definitely be discussing this with my Dad. I'm pretty sure he'll be open to it.

Natasha,

It's funny you should say a Scorpio woman. Mom's a Scorpio Sun/Moon (Mars and Neptune). It's almost like she's got him under some kind of spell and he can't see how bad she is. I suppose it's not all bad, she does need someone in her corner. He's the only one (out of her 3 children) that really has anything to do with her. He does know on some level that she's toxic, but there's definitely an issue with depth perception.

posted November 14, 2004 03:57 PM              

Your analysis hits the spot.

LibraSparkle,

posted September 04, 2005 03:48 AM              

kind of envy those scorp women and their power.

he is with a scorp woman who has introduced him to the life of drinking (against our religion he hadnt drunk till he turned 23), drugs, partying, drug smuggling, violence and sometimes even some jailtime involved here, rock n roll liefstyle. hes been in med school for 6 yrs, no chance of graduating. now he was caught doing drugs and distributing them on campus, will be evaluated by the action committee. these cases almost always result in expulsion from the school and i suspect he will be expelled.

he will have a 400,000 dollar loan, payments will start after he is expelled. he will not be able to go to any other med school, he will be lucky if he can get a min. wage job with those problems and addictions.

he is not highly intelligent or anything like that. he is not hardworking either. he is very musical, and plays the guitar very well, but even in that he is no genius.

he is also a big liar, i dont mean that in a cruel way, i mean he lies a lot period. i lie a lot too, but never as big lies as he does tell. he has been leading this double life for a while and we just found out now.

he couldnt care less if me, my sis etc live or die, he just calls when he needs money. hes on the path to destruction all right. his gf is significantly older than him , and puts all sorts of weird ideas in his head. i have nothing against her, i dont blame her sun sign (shes a scorp , with either 6 or 8 planets in scorp i believe). on the other hand my scorp sister, with 3 planets conj. in scorp, and scorp rising, is trying to convince my bro to leave the lifestyle, but to no avail. i guess the 6/8 scorp wins out over the 3. my brainless libra/cap bro is obviously too stupid to do his own thinking, wouldnt be surprised if all those ODs killed half his brain cells.

hes also developed a number of diseases and seizures becoz of his abusive behavior. this is a shock to our family, where every member has postgraduate education and we are considered 'upper middle class'. u could say we are very sheltered, conservative, although i break those rules, but didnt get messed up like my bro. still on the education path, etc.

i have no idea how to reach him. if i try to talk to him about his lifestyle he wont listen. i am at the pt. 26t talked about. i feel my power to transform or even convince is really zero, despite that scorp stellium. maybe its coz my sun is gem, i am not good at understanding, just analyzing.

in either case it is definitely discouraging. what can a woman do huh.

posted September 04, 2005 09:46 PM              

I thought both you and Gemini Nymph where mad at me

I think game design may be the way to go for him then, i'm currently in the process of getting into it.

My question is does he know how to do
c ++ programing? is he an artist or does he know to do 3d modeling/animation?

if he's one of three then ya game design is the way to go, i've been doing 3D Modeling since high school,

kinda like what Gemini Nymph said the second i was introduced to 3DS Max(one of the programs they use for 3D Animation)i was way to intrested in it could never ever drop the subject with anyone.

i have a copy of 3DS Max i can e-mail it if you like, maybe he can "play around with the program and learn a thing or two".

most of the people in the game industry where self taught, and learned everything on there own if he mastered all of those game then by all means he can start making them.

say out of curiosity he hasn't played full metal alchemist has he?