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Author Topic:   About a friend
dorkus_malorkus
unregistered
posted March 05, 2005 03:48 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
My best friend is a Taurus sun/Scorp moon and lately I've been worried about her. She goes through periods of withdrawing and hiding in her room. Even though she's my best friend, I don't always know how to talk to her because she becomes very sensitive. But I've never once thought about terminating the friendship because she's one of the most brilliant and cheerful people I know. I've tried to get her help, but that's all I can do. I can't really talk to her family becuase they kind of hate me and think that I'm part of the reason she's depressed.

I sometimes worry that I don't do enough and was wondering what kinds of things I could do to show her how wonderful she is?

Please send healing light her way, ok?

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running_bull
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From: usa
Registered: Jul 2009

posted March 05, 2005 06:35 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for running_bull     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
done. i'll be sending her good vibes in a few moments.
I truly hope you both will be good and okay. I also wish you good fortune and will send some good vibes your way too.

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dorkus_malorkus
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posted March 05, 2005 07:49 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Thank you

I seem to have the same problems with other people w/ heavy Scorp influences (ie, my mom and my ex bf) It's like these people get sucked into my life, but as emotional as I am, I have trouble relating to their emotions and such and I tend to stick my foot in my mouth. I don't mean to offend certain people, but they tend to take things I say offensively which is not my intent. I've noticed a trend that almost all of the friends I've ever had have their moon in a water sign. I'm taking this as a sign that there are very important lessons to be learned from these people.......

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astro junkie
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posted March 05, 2005 01:52 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Dorkus -

I'm very impressed that you would do anything to help your friend. I have a Chiron in Pisces in the 10th - hence - it can become a bit of a career with me. Just remember, part of what may be motivating you to help her is because you seek some similar help yourself. I've been there. We do everything for another which we REALLY want someone to do for US.

Sometimes life works out perfectly that way and it's happily ever after. Many times, it does not. Just know where to draw a boundary with your friend, and don't be a neurological surgeon on her or yourself. Remember the adage about trying to save a drowning person. Just be honest with how much you can handle, as well as acknowledging the changes your are going through, and NEED to grow through in order that you become selfish with your needs in a way you can live with.

------------------
... it's better to light a candle than curse the darkness

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pidaua
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Posts: 67
From: Back in AZ with Bear the Leo
Registered: Apr 2009

posted March 05, 2005 04:30 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for pidaua     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Dorkus...

May I ask you a very honest and brutal question? Do you find that you are somewhat pessimistic? Are you also guilty of being critical of most things around you and letting people know?

I am not saying that is bad..just understand my point...

See, people with heavy water will pick up those negative vibrations. I have my Sun in the 4th house, Saturn in the 8th and two prominant Scorp planets- 1 in Pisces..

Sometimes I can handle emotional outbursts, negativity..etc..but then there are times when it just really takes a lot out of me. I have had friends that seem to take SO MUCH energy out of me that by the end of our conversation I need to just crawl into bed and decompress.

If you are voicing your troubles to these water moon people- say unloading all your school, family, friend problems you may be putting them on emotional overload.

If it was just one instance- one friend, then I would say that she had the problem. But, if you are noting this reoccuring theme in others with water moons in your life as well as her parents are blaming you, maybe you should also see how your relationship with her is affecting her. Does she go into hibernation after the two of you spend a lot of time talking about problems? Who's problems do you talk about? Etc..

Sorry..there was just not enough info surrounding the problem itself- so that is why I am kind of digging. Please don't think I am pointing fingers at you.

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dorkus_malorkus
unregistered
posted March 05, 2005 09:03 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Pid,
I understand what you are saying. And you are right - before I went into the hospital, I kind of had a breakdown and would tell my friend all of my problems even though I realize she didn't always have the emotional strength and capacity to deal with them. I feel kind of bad now and we had a talk about it the other day. She told me that it did really stress her out to listen to everything even though I know she does care. Now I just want to concentrate on being there 4 her like she was for me.

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pidaua
Knowflake

Posts: 67
From: Back in AZ with Bear the Leo
Registered: Apr 2009

posted March 05, 2005 09:12 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for pidaua     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Hi Dorkus,

That's cool! I am glad the two of you had a good talk. I have learned that lesson from experience- my mom is a Cancer sun / cancer moon, scorp rising. My Brother is a Sag Sun / Scorp moon Pisces rising and my dad also has a water moon.

I am the only one in the family that has a fire sun / fire moon..so my antics- my over enthusiasm used to wear my mom out..in fact, she could pick up on the tension in her surroundings, but not knowing how to handle it, she would lash out. My brother would internalize and just kind of go into his own little world.

You are being a great friend for your friend since you were able to discuss it. In time you and your friend will learn how to balance each other out, so that you can both be emotionally supportive.

I had a close friend that was a Scorp Sun / Cancer moon / Pisces rising. She was sweet, but her emotional state was much like your friends. She had a hard time with my more upbeat on the go nature. She had a horrible marriage and would come to work just looking horrid- mainly because she had just given up due to her internal pain.

I tried to hard to pull her out, but her hubby was too strong and too controlling. He was a Scorp Sun / Taurus moon / Leo rising. I am not sure what she is doing now, but she was like your friend in that she would withdrawl from the world. Sometimes it happened when we worked together and I couldn't count on her to go with me to see accounts- she would just stay in her hotel room and watch movies..

Good luck with your friend. I am so sorry about your breakdown. I think that with some of these tense planetary alignments people are being pushed to the extreme- especially for you, a Virgo, with Uranus in Pisces and Pluto in Sag..

Hang in there Dorkus..you WILL be stronger once you pull through this..

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purple_scorp
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posted March 06, 2005 12:14 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Hi Dorkus,

It might also be that she is an introvert (as many Scorp's are) and that means that to re-energise, she needs her solitude.

There is only so much of being a rock for other people that we Scorp's can take. Every now and again, we have to shut off to the external world.

I wonder what she would say if you simply said to her, "I want to be there for you, but I don't know how. How can I help?"

Maybe being left alone, but knowing she can call on you, is enough for her at this time. The other problem of course is that some Scorps internalise and don't ask for help and well, sometimes no-one can help them anyway!!!

purple_scorp

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dorkus_malorkus
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posted March 06, 2005 12:55 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Thanks Pid BTW, Uranus in Pisces and Pluto and Sag? I have Uranus in Sag and Pluto in Scorp.......

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dorkus_malorkus
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posted March 06, 2005 01:03 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Purple_scorp,
I know exactly what you mean about Scorps Being a Taurus counteracts some of that crazy Scorp energy of hers, so she's been very patient with me I don't understand how anyone could put up with me for that long!

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pidaua
Knowflake

Posts: 67
From: Back in AZ with Bear the Leo
Registered: Apr 2009

posted March 06, 2005 01:06 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for pidaua     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Hi Dorkus..I meant transit wise. The current Uranus position is in Pisces (opposing your natal Sun and any other Virgo planets you have..not to mention sending beams to your own Natal Uranus in Sag).

Pluto being in Sag right now is sending heartfelt lessons to your Virgo planets.. this is a time of learning

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virgotaurustaurus
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posted March 06, 2005 01:38 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
It indeed is! *another Virgo having lessons being taught to her*

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dorkus_malorkus
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posted March 06, 2005 03:10 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Oh lol sorry Pid, I wasn't thinking clearly for a second there :P

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sue g
unregistered
posted March 06, 2005 05:54 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Oh Dorkus,

How lucky your friend is to have such a wonderful person in her life. I am Scorpio Sun/Taurus Moon and have always been this way - hiding from people then within days the life and the soul of he party. Ive had friends let me down (I think coz they are scared of the intensity) and even my partner at the moment isnt coping with my moods. I recommend you write her a note telling her how much you care for her - maybe a lovely little gift - and just giving her the message that you are there. Last week I went through a kind of breakdown - everything tumbled down on me - housefire, son being bullied at school, husband not coping with my emotions and more, and added to that someone who I thought was my best friend let me down at the last minute....I found it devestating. I really appreciate honesty and if this person was honest with me there wouldn't have been a problem. If your friend is anything like me she will be extremely vulnerable and need plenty of support............but be assured she will be a true friend back in your time of need, and your friendship will mean the world to her - I hope this helps, God bless, and be kind to each other xx

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dorkus_malorkus
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posted March 06, 2005 10:17 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Sue,
Sorry to hear about your situation. Yeah, I experienced a house fire too, a few mos. ago. Very traumatic. Well, as I have learned things can only get better - I mean it just helps to think that everyday and I hope everything turns out ok for you

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sue g
unregistered
posted March 06, 2005 12:37 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Thanks Dorkus for your encouraging words - hope your friend feels better soon - sending light and magic, sue x

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Heart--Shaped Cross
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Registered: Nov 2010

posted March 06, 2005 11:57 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Heart--Shaped Cross     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
hey dorkus,

Sorry to hear about the fire.

On the subject of your friend...

Maybe you've already considered this, but, sometimes people with heavy Scorpio, 8th house, or Plutonian influences, just need to, as pidaua put it, "decompress" at various points in their life. Scorps especially, I think, aren't always good at letting the emotional build-up go, at the end of the day. Often they accumulate and retain emotional baggage so excessively that they are forced to resort to considerable periods of solitude.

From personal experience, I can tell you that I am especially appreciative of, and grateful for, the people who remained loyal to me during such times, and understood that it was just another season in the transitional life of a scorpion, and nothing personal after all.

But I'm just rambling. I hope that helped and wasnt a complete waste of your time.

take it easy,
hsc

------------------
Judgement is the antithesis of understanding.

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purple_scorp
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posted March 07, 2005 02:21 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Dear Sue,

wow, how interesting....I've had a shocking past two weeks myself....what were the planets doing for us Sun Scorps to have caused this??? Big hug for you ((((Sue)))).

Another thing you mentioned struck a chord with me too. I've felt particularly let down by friends since the end of January. My mum died and not one of my friends came to the funeral to support me. They've hardly come to visit me since I've returned to my home town, either.

I discussed this with a close Arian friend who told me that I always come off as being very strong and independent. And maybe people look at me and think everything is okay. Well, things seem to have been much better for me this weekend so I'm looking forward to a good week. Dorkus, that might be a clue for you. Maybe all of us Scorps have been through the mill and we need peeps like you standing by, in whatever fashion that might take. My taurus friend dropped in the other day and gave me a book about angels. It was really lovely.

purple_scorp

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sue g
unregistered
posted March 07, 2005 09:55 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Oh Purplescorp, from one to another, what a load of ******* letdowns your friends are (I know you wont take offence at that coz mine are too ha ha). Talk about in your time of need. You know what when you are able I would challenge them about this and tell them how you would have liked support. You lost your mammy for gods sake - where were they? I think you are right when we are seen as strong, but we can be breaking up inside at times and there is no one there, is this our ultimate lesson, to stand alone? I hope you are okay, please keep in touch, or if theres anything I can do, you have a friend, God bless xxxx

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astro junkie
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posted March 08, 2005 01:16 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Just reminded me, I heard Sylvia Browne talking about how she just ABSORBS EVERYTHING, and how she just has to turn everything OFF because it will wear her down. She's a Libra w/Sag Moon.

She's got Venus & MC in Scorpio, Saturn in Pisces. She's got Mercury & Neptune in the 8th House. I'm thinking Aquarius' tend to absorb a lot too. I wonder if a Uranus in the 3rd House would do it ...

But me personally, have had to find ways to shut everything out since way back, Moon in Cancer, Chiron in Pisces, Mercury/Mars/Neptune in Scorpio.

------------------
... it's better to light a candle than curse the darkness

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pidaua
Knowflake

Posts: 67
From: Back in AZ with Bear the Leo
Registered: Apr 2009

posted March 08, 2005 03:04 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for pidaua     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
That is very ironic that you mention that AJ..I was watching her the other day on Montel and noticed that she seemed drained..almost ill. I thought to myself "All that psychic energy going out and nothing coming in..she is going to need to sleep for days on this one".

I know that I get like that. There are certain times of year where I dream and remember my dreams all night long. It is like a psychic overload. I will even dream about non sequitor events concerning old friends (later I will find out they were perfoming the tasks I dreamed about)... Most often it is when the Sun is in Pisces or Scorpio..especially when combined with water moons. Last week was like that..with the Sun in Pisces and Moon in Scorp.

The residual effect just laid me out over the weekend. We'll see how the New moon goes

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purple_scorp
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posted March 08, 2005 06:56 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Originally posted by Pidua: Last week was like that.with the Sun in Pisces and Moon in Scorp.

Ah, I wonder if that was the planet’s actions that I was referring to (with respect for things being tough for Scorps at the moment). Dorkus, your friend might be having a better week this week.

Sue, thanks very much for your support. I have actually let a few of my friends know that I was all alone on that day (I am single at the moment, so I didn’t have a SO there either). They looked like sheep with their tails between their legs when I told them.

p_s

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virgotaurustaurus
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posted March 08, 2005 07:07 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Wow, I can relate both to friends being major let-downs, and soaking everything in and then having to have considerable amounts of solitude. Both are actually going on for me right now! Ever since I came back here from college in November most of my old "friends" seem to not care less. How awesome. I feel so loved! The only relief from that is that my life isn't like it was before I left. Funny how things can change so much in about 2 months.

I soak in everything. I really think this has to do with my first house moon mostly. It's incredibly draining, to the point where I look so white, like a ghost. It is like there is no door, not shut-off point between my inner world and the outer world.

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sue g
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posted March 09, 2005 04:33 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Good for you Purple Scorp. In true Scorpio style I wouldnt either bother contacting them again. Within the last two weeks Ive had four people who I thought were mates (one a sister) act indifferently to me because they didn't like what I was goint thro. This healer woman said to me (and I think this is part of the Scorp thing you mentioned) "you are real - defences down and they are scared cos they are coming from ego". I understood what she meant. Its tough, but at the end of the day, you have only yourself - I am now learning to enjoy who I am - good luck to you xxx

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sue g
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posted March 09, 2005 04:39 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Sorry Virgotaurus, I meant to include this note on my last posting. I feel it is so important to be able to relate and obviously we can and there are hundreds more like that too. My mother used to say about some of my friendds "they are not worthy" - aahh bless (maybe theyre no hey)??? I am now thinking before I use the word "friend", well at this stage of my life (an in my 40s) have come to the conclusion we are our own best friends. We are obviously very sensitive people when you said you absorbed everything oh God I know how that feels. Well you know when things happend and we get ****** off we can write it down to each other - isnt that great. My only bit of advice would be please please please be careful of who you take into you life, as my old mother said "they are not worthy. God bless xxxxxx

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