posted July 18, 2006 02:11 AM              

Less important than WHY you were afraid of authority when you were a child is what you must do to overcome this fear as an adult: face authority and face your fears. If you are already doing this, fine. If not, perhaps you have your values restricted by authority? Having Taurus (physical, also values) modifying Saturn (duty, also authority, restriction) can be experienced this way. All you have to do to overcome this is to realize YOU are the authority on the values in your life. Once you realize this...the fear will disappear!

Disappearing,

posted July 18, 2006 04:20 AM              

last week I stood up to him after he verbally tore my head off in public and he forbid me to phone or visit my mom's house. After that I decided to totally write him out of my life and move on with my life.

Since February I have seen a bunch of chnages within me and so have my friends. They are so proud of me and to see me slowly emerging from my coccoon.

posted July 18, 2006 09:10 PM            

First off, I'm sorry for what you have been through. It's wonderful to hear that you are taking charge, standing up for yourself and finally letting the real you shine.

Saturn and Capricorn govern fear, as well as authority and the father. Authority and the father are goverened by the 10th house and MC.

Saturn is in the 12th house (subconscious), which can be a placement for experiencing fearful feelings. Saturn in the 12th may indicate that you want the father figure hidden, out of your life completely or actually is out of your life completely.

Saturn squares your Aquarian MC. This may indicate that your father figure was dominating and restricting in some manner, which allowed you to experience fear, isolation and to hide within yourself. It would also indicate a fear of authority. This interpretation could be also be directed at your mother because Saturn is squaring the IC, the 4th house cusp.

You have the ruler of your MC (the father), Uranus, in hard aspect (opposition) to the Sun (also the father). This may indicate that the father figure was unstable, erratic, impulsive and rash.

Both Uranus and the Sun are squaring your Mars to create a T-square in Capricorn in the 8th house. There is a lot of unstable and erractic energies going on with those particular aspects, possibily indicating the abuse that you experienced.

The Sun is also the ruler of your 4th house cusp, which was why your mom participated in the abuse.

With Mars in Capricorn, the focal point of your T-square, your energies may become fearful and inhibited. It can be an indication of being or wanting to be separated from authority figures and the father. Being in the 8th house, it's aided by your intensity.

Mars and Saturn in Taurus, a fixed sign, are trine, which has given you the discipline to put up with what you have experienced.

posted July 19, 2006 02:35 AM              

I quite enjoyed your read and I can actually see what your saying.

The "father figures" in my life were way too controlling and I have a great sense of inner discipline. They have been a major stick in the mud for me.

At the moment I'm going through some major transits and the changes within myself are mindboggling, in a good way. The transits that come to mind is T Pluto sqaure N Pluto, T Saturn Trine my sun and about to go into my 4th house soon, Then Saturn sqaure saturn and then it hits my south node. (My progressed moon went into the 5th and into scorpio.....in my prog chart.)OHHHHHH come december I will be having my jupiter return - jupiter rules my 7th house and is found in the 6th house conj neppy)

My friends tell me that I have changed a lot in 6 months. I heard many people say that they are so proud of me standing up to my tyrant stepdad and writing him out of my life. people are saying I have a tonne of courage - I just view it as things that I need to do for myself, that's all.

Many things are soon changing in my life. I'm not happy with my job and don't want to be a caregiver any more, My daughter cries at night to be with her father and my heart breaks seeing this, my family structure is changing and I'm only keeping those who find me dear to them.

Changes abound and I know not where it takes me - I'm headed off into uncharted territory without a map. it's hard to say where I'll be in a few months time - with this metamorphisis happening.....

have a great night all!

ID

posted July 30, 2006 02:16 PM              

In your Natal Chart do you have :::

Sun Square Saturn

or

Saturn Square Uranus ?

If not, what are all your Natal Aspects to your Natal Saturn?

posted August 05, 2006 06:09 AM            

All my life, I've been respectful and polite and abiding that sjust how I am. However, inside, I just stand being told what to do by anyone or anything. If it was someone who was definitely in authority over me like a boss or parent, I would listen, mind you, however, in the back of my head it was almost as if they were paving a path for revenge from me.... What i don't get is, it's so powerful...and now that I'm older, it's clearly more controlled however, it's also a much stronger feeling (now geared towards respect from authority- if they don't give it then I dont listen anymore).

posted August 05, 2006 11:58 AM              

You asked:

quote:

---

So a blatant, disregard, almost inner and subconscious refusal to accept authority... how would that be shown?...my IC is in Aquarius [so Midheaven is in Leo]...someone who was definitely in authority over me like a boss or parent, I...listen...however, in the back of my head it was almost as if they were paving a path for revenge from me...respect from authority- if they don't give it then I dont listen anymore)...I have some squares to the MC

---

It seems to me you answered your own question! With squares (energy needs to be combined with) Leo (self-expression, also ego) modifying Midheaven (outer world), your ego wants to be recognized in the outer world. Since squares are challenging interconnections, this results in your wanting to challenge those in the outer world who don't recognize you. In general, squares to the Midheaven indicate authority issues.

In the outer world,