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Author Topic:   need help with birth charts
double trouble gemini
unregistered
posted August 31, 2006 10:01 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
i request someone to please check our birth charts and tell me what is the problem with us.
i know this guys for 9 years now, he was my boyfriend,not any more but i cant seem to completely fall in love with him and i cant seem to live without him... (we have finally broken off all contacts with eachother.. (i feel like i am depressed and miss his company alot)
pls can anyone point out what is wrong? and are we really astrologicaly compatiable? or its better to move on.....

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double trouble gemini
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posted August 31, 2006 10:22 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
his birth chart:
http://i41.photobucket.com/albums/e253/gemini1981/achart_qm5fileNjXSqv-u1157033035-1.g if

my chart:
[URL=http://i41.photobucket.com/albums/e253/gemini1981/achart_qm5fileNjXSqv-u1157033035.gif] http://i41.photobucket.com/albums/e253/gemini1981/achart_qm5fileNjXSqv-u1157033035.gif

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wilsontc
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posted August 31, 2006 02:12 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
gemini,

You said:

quote:
...i cant seem to completely fall in love with him...

This seems to indicate you are NOT in love with him...so it is better to move on and find someone you ARE in love with. Between you you have aspects between Uranus (friends) and Venus (relationships), indicating this might have been more of a "friendly relationship".

Urging moving on,

Tim

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For information on basic astrological chart interpretation see: http://www.geocities.com/wilsontctc

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double trouble gemini
unregistered
posted August 31, 2006 05:18 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
thank you Tim,
please do let me know if you have found any other unusual or intresting aspect in the charts or in particular my chart....
thanks

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pseudofemme
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posted August 31, 2006 10:11 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
A few things jump out at me with your synastry.

His chart makes a lot of difficult aspects to your Uranus--indicating a very unstable relationship. His Sun squares your Uranus, so there's probably a strong fascination between the two of you, but you might argue/disagree over trivial details. And you probably require a lot of freedom... possibly more freedom than he is willing to give you.

His Moon is in opposition to your Uranus as well. This indicates that he might feel threatened by your need for independence and freedom, but you might feel tied down by his emotional needs.

His Mercury squares your Uranus, so communication might be tense at times... there may be a feeling that either he is trying to change the way you think, or you're trying to change the way he thinks. Sometimes you two just might be on different wavelengths about things and have trouble conveying what you're trying to say.

His Venus square your Uranus, so you might feel constrained at times about his values and attitudes towards relationships. Again, he might feel threatened by your need for freedom. On the other hand, you may feel a strong sexual magnetism towards each other.

Along with the Uranus aspects, there are a few North Node aspects that might be significant. I've found that relationships where there are a lot of aspects to the Node tend to be REALLY hard to get over--even if the relationship clearly has no future. Aspects to the Nodes give a relationship a "fated" feeling, like you've known each other in the past, are meant to be together, are meant to teach each other lessons, etc.

Your North Node squares his Chiron, meaning his path of healing and your path of "soul growth" in this lifetime are at odds. You may feel drawn to each other, but both of you would hold each other back in life if you stayed together.

Your Mercury squares his North Node. Occasionally you support each other's growth and needs, but at other times, you both pull up stuff from the past and make it hard for the other to move forward. A relationship with this aspect tends to be haunted by the past, with old experiences preventing the relationship from healthfully developing.

Then there are a few other aspects indicating trouble for this relationship. Your Mars squares his Venus, which can lead to excitement and attraction, but the relationship is unstable--especially because the two of you may have very different values and expectations.

His Mars squares your Pluto. This is tough because it leads to power conflicts, and if either of you tries to change the other in any way, anger or resentment can erupt.

Your Jupiters are square, so you might have very different views on things like politics, religion, or philosophy. Plus, the things he enjoys and finds rewarding aren't likely to interest you much (and vice versa). You'll need a lot of space apart in order to do the things you like to do.

Lastly, your Venus squares his Pluto, so there might be issues with mind games/manipulation when it comes to love.

Also, he has three planets (Sun, Venus, Mercury) in your twelfth house. This can lead to a lot of confusion in the relationship, inconsistant feelings, and emotions that neither of you may fully understand.

There are some positive aspects as well, so it's easy to see why the two of you got along--your Suns are sextile, his Sun sextiles your Moon and Mercury, your Mercury trines his Venus, etc. But comparing the charts as a whole, there are a lot of indicators if instability and potential problems... so try not to lament too much over the breakup. Chances are, you two taught each other some important lessons in life but now it's time to move on.

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astro junkie
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posted September 01, 2006 03:58 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
pseudofemme -

I really like your whole interpretation. It gave me some landmarks to check against my Synastry.

What is your overall opinion on Synastry where there are indications that in each person's Natal, they require lots of "space" in relationships -- and then in Synastry, they have lots of (and all) positive Aspects to Uranus with each other. What astro influence would you reach for first in order to look at "stability" glue? Or would you even feel compelled to at that point?

Thanks.

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... it's better to light a candle than curse the darkness

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astro junkie
unregistered
posted September 01, 2006 04:01 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
PS: Pluto Aspects 98% all good.

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... it's better to light a candle than curse the darkness

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23
Knowflake

Posts: 250
From: The Strand
Registered: Apr 2009

posted September 01, 2006 05:02 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for 23     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Boring but stable aspects are things involving Saturn. Eg Saturn conjunct/trine venus is quite a stable aspect to have. But you also have Jupiter and Saturn on his NN, which probably gave the relationship some length and good feeling. Otherwise glue aspects might be the big ones like a good relationship between partners suns and moons, ascendant and descendent the reverse of the other, positive aspects between vertexes and nodes to other planets. Its about filling in the hole the other has.

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double trouble gemini
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posted September 01, 2006 06:00 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
pseudofemme... that was AMAZING
you gave me so much info and all of it so accurate.
everything you pointed out is so true, we both keep controlling eachother, my intrests, aims and ambitions seem nothing to him,
we argue all the time,he needs his own space, i too need freedom in choosing my career and my way of living.... but yet we feel a very very strong connection/ attraction towards eachother, isnt been 9 (mostly) unhappy years of knowing eachother but we still cant let go,.... but as you said better move on....
we both really feel we are being tied down in this relationship.
thanks a ton pseudofemme

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double trouble gemini
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posted September 01, 2006 06:10 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Its about filling in the hole the other has.
very true 23
i too beleive in this and we did try to work out on our diffrences and help eachother to overcome our weaknesses but somethings are too strong to bend they just break.. thats what happened to our relationship.

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pseudofemme
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posted September 05, 2006 01:13 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
astro junkie--I just saw your question here; I've been out of town without a computer, so sorry it took me so long to reply!

When two people who need a lot of freedom are in a relationship, there are a couple of things I look for to indicate stability. Good Saturn aspects can *sometimes* be helpful, but I find in situations where freedom is a huge issue, too many Saturn aspects (even if they're positive) will still create a feeling of restraint... so I don't focus on Saturn in these types of situations.

Instead, two things are important: positive aspects to the Nodes, and positive aspects to Venus and Mercury.

It's important that there are enough indicators of romantic attraction to balance out the need for space. The bond created by positive North Node aspects (especially conjunctions) is strong--the people involved will feel intuitively that they are good for each other, that the relationship is helping them grow, and that bailing out on account of the need for "freedom" isn't worth it. Aspects between the North Node and Moon, Venus, or Mercury are especially helpful.

Any conjunctions to the South Node can occasionally be helpful as well, but here, the feeling of being tied down can arise (because of the South Node's karmic connotations to past lives), again stifling the independence and freedom of the people in the relationship. On the other hand, the South Node also breeds a feeling of familiarity and of having an instantaneous understanding of one another, so two freedom-seeking people with South Node aspects might intuitively understand each other's needs. It can really go either way, depending on the rest of the synastry.

Good aspects to Mercury are a must, since these types of relationships need both people to be on the same wavelength when it comes to communication. Otherwise, the amount of space one person feels comfortable with may be too much or too little for the other--resulting in a relationship that feels either too distant or too suffocating. Good Mercury aspects make this less likely to happen. When there is clear communication, the two partners can usually adjust to accomodate each other.

Positive aspects to Venus are always helpful, since the relationship needs enough romantic attraction to keep the people in the relationship coming back to each other, rather than drifting apart on their quests for independence. I'm always weary of squares to Venus, and also to Mars, which can create sexual attraction but also instability and changeable feelings. Sextiles and trines with one person's Venus to the other's personal planets are excellent.

The romantic bond can also occur from one person having planets in the other's fifth or seventh house.

I also look for any difficult aspects to Neptune, especially squares with Mercury or Venus. If Neptune is poorly aspected, then what often happens is that one person (or both) doesn't see the relationship as it really is--and may deceive themselves or their partner about how much space is really okay with them. Likewise, planets in the other person's eighth or twelfth houses can cause deception, confusion, and secrecy, as well as muddy the communication between the partners.

That's all very general, of course. A lot depends on what exactly in the individual natal charts causes their need for freedom. Sometimes the "need for freedom" is a guise for someone's fear of intimacy, need for secrecy, fear of commitment, etc., in which case no amount of good synastry will help until the person overcomes those personal traits. (Such would be the case with someone with difficult aspects between the Moon/Mercury/Neptune/Pluto, a lot of 8th or 12th house placements, etc. In contrast, someone might have a genuine craving for freedom, not tainted by alterior motives, if they have a lot of Aquarius or 11th house placements. It all depends.)

I hope that helps some.

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astro junkie
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posted September 05, 2006 04:30 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Thank you for your thoughtful reply pseudofemme. Gave me much to think about, and check.

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... it's better to light a candle than curse the darkness

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