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Author
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Topic: Moving in together / Marriage
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BlueEyes24
unregistered
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posted September 09, 2006 08:15 AM
 
Alright, so what do you think about moving in together with your significant other BEFORE getting married? OR, what are your experiences with it if you already have? Post your views on marriage/living together, and your sun/moon/venus/mars/asc. 
-Marriage is something that is very important to me, but of course with the RIGHT person. And I would move in with the person beforehand, as long as I was 100% ready and knew that the person was commited to me and planned on marrying eventually.
I'm a Virgo sun/Scorpio moon/Scorpio venus/Cap mars/Sag ASC. IP: Logged |
lllog
unregistered
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posted September 09, 2006 08:34 AM
Moving in together is the best thing that I ever did. I tried marriage twice and it didn't take.
Virgo Sun, Cancer Moon, Capricorn Asc, Scorpio Venus, Aries Mars.
Lanny IP: Logged |
and
unregistered
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posted September 09, 2006 08:35 AM
If you move in together make sure you dont live together longer than a year, coz cases show people who live together over a year before marriage are likely to divorce....its a weird stat but true...------------------
"WHATEVER the soul longs for, WILL be attained by the spirit" "Love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation" -Khalil Gibran IP: Logged |
sue g
unregistered
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posted September 09, 2006 08:53 AM
I married three times and lived with the last two men before marriage.The only reason I married my present husband is becos we decided to have a child. We had spent almost 10 years together of unwedded bliss. * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * "Marriage is a great institution, but who wants to live in an institution" "One ought to try everything in life just once, except incest and morris dancing" "Remember that a good marriage depends on two things, finding the right person and being the right person" Sun, Venus, Jupiter Mercury, Neptune in Scorpio, Aries Asc, Moon and Mars in Taurus. IP: Logged |
Dulce Luna
Newflake Posts: 7
From: The Asylum, NC
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted September 09, 2006 08:56 AM
I personally wouldn't do it but only for financial reasons-not moral. Morally, I have no problem with the concept of living together before marriage or anyone who does it. The reason I wouldn't do it is the "what ifs". What if you break up? Then you have figure out who gets what and everything. Its too messy for me, which is why I would rather cement the union first. But that could change, its just how I feel at the moment. cancer sun/virgo moon/gemini venus/aries mars/cap asc. IP: Logged |
DragonflyAries
unregistered
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posted September 09, 2006 09:26 AM
My hubby and I lived together for about 2 years before we got married... we've had our ups and downs, but we're still together. Just had our 2nd anniversary! That being said though, there are some guys that I wish to gods I had never lived with! One ran up my credit card to over $2000, another cheated on me and moved out leaving me with an apartment full of bills. Just use your intuition... I wish I had been listening to mine way back when. LOL Sun-Aries, Moon-Virgo, ASC-Gemini, Venus-Taurus, Mars-Leo IP: Logged |
illusions_fool
unregistered
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posted September 09, 2006 10:23 AM
I've read that couples who don't live together before marriage are much more likely to stay together than couples who live together before they get married. Besides, isn't it more romantic to share the same space for the first time when you've gotten married. I don't know, I always imagined like the honeymoon would be the first time you'd be together with your significant other when it comes to like, sharing the same bed, sharing the same space, ect. ect. But people don't think that way anymore, so I don't know. That's the way I'd want it to work out anyway.~Rebekka IP: Logged |
The Virgin
unregistered
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posted September 09, 2006 10:47 AM
If I hadn't lived with my last boyfriend and ended up marrying him-I don't even want to think about the mess it would have been-it was bad enough as it was.A person can show you what they want to show you if they don't have to keep up appearances 24/7. But when you live with someone the true colors come out. ------------------
Sun Virgo, moon Pisces, Libra rising,mercury venus 12th house all conjunct, Mars Leo. IP: Logged |
astro junkie
unregistered
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posted September 09, 2006 10:42 PM
BlueEyes24 -Sun Libra
Moon Cancer
Venus Virgo
Mars Scorpio
Asc Taurus I'm reading all these posts and it's so nice to see what everyone's ideal answer is.  I also notice a lot of people have Virgo, Capricorn, Scorpio, Gemini energies.
sue g -
Ah! Is unwedded bliss a little like being happily unmarried?
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... it's better to light a candle than curse the darkness IP: Logged |
aquaspryt69
unregistered
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posted September 09, 2006 10:51 PM
Definitely live together first. Ya don't want any nasty surprises. 
Scorpio Sun/Asc Pisces Moon
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Azalaksh
Knowflake Posts: 982
From: New Brighton, MN, USA
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted September 10, 2006 12:07 AM
Absolutely live together – pass on the marriage!!  But that’s just me, Aqua DSC….. I decided not to make my liaisons permanent after living with the fellas I did. And I’m glad I chose to do the dress-rehearsals – I would’ve been unhappy several years into the marriage if I had chosen the ring before the test-drive
Serial Monogamy seems to be the pattern of my life…. Are you going to compile signs and answers, BlueEyes24?? Sun-Libra / Moon-Pisces / Venus-Libra / Mars-Virgo / Asc-Leo IP: Logged |
Wednesday
unregistered
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posted September 10, 2006 12:18 AM
I would LOVE to live together before marriage. In fact, I'm looking forward to it... I don't really like to live alone, I need a companion. Moving in together just feels natural. BUT everytime I intend to do that, the Universe interfere and the plan got smashed just like that. I seriously don't know why. Probably I'm not meant to live together before marriage.Alrighty then, just go straight to marriage! Scorpio Sun/Aries Moon/Pisces Rising/Libra Venus/Virgo Mars IP: Logged |
cat71
unregistered
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posted September 10, 2006 08:13 AM
Been there - done that!
I lived with a guy for 9 yrs (on and off) and personally that experience has left me feeling like I would NEVER live with a man again unless we WERE married first...
Of course that doesn't mean I wouldn't spend weekends, work holidays etc together, but as my dear mum says 'Why buy the cow if you get the milk for free'
Of course, saying that, if it suits other people's relationships then go for it - but it's not for me is all - I want TOTAL commitment next time round 
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Sun = Libra; Moon = Cancer; Venus = Libra; Mars = Aquarius; Asc = Taurus------------------
...to have been loved so deeply, even though the person who loved us is gone, will give us some protection forever... IP: Logged |
Jan_A
unregistered
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posted September 10, 2006 10:40 AM
If i am compatible with a person, there is no difference. Why do you have to make things so complicated? Love should be the aim, and not marriage.
Sun Pisces-Moon Capricorn-Venus Aries-Mars Taurus-Asc Virgo
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cat71
unregistered
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posted September 12, 2006 05:12 AM
Just want to say - Marriage is not my goal in life! I have raised my daughter on my own for the last 12 years I don't need a man in my life, but I would like someone to love. All I'm saying is I'd feel more secure and more valued if there was a ring on my finger - but as I said previously, to each their own, this is just my opinion...
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...to have been loved so deeply, even though the person who loved us is gone, will give us some protection forever... IP: Logged |
DayDreamer
unregistered
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posted September 13, 2006 02:31 AM
Hey...personally, and as an Aquarian sun/mars/mercury in the 10th/9th cusp opposite Leo jupiter on IC I have got to have a marriage contract before I move in...something to set the partnership in stone as a permanent arrangement..and if things go wrong we've already made the deal before hand. Words of trust (by mouth) arent enough for me. Also have Sag Venus/Neptune in the 7th.IP: Logged |
future_uncertain
Knowflake Posts: 193
From:
Registered: May 2009
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posted September 13, 2006 08:24 AM
quote:
'Why buy the cow if you get the milk for free'
Why buy the pig when all you want is a little sausage? IP: Logged |
starflower
Newflake Posts: 15
From: UK
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted September 13, 2006 08:27 AM
We did not live together before we married - I wish we had done. If we'd lived together we would not have got married and would not have stayed together for longer than a year.I took marriage extremely seriously and I put up with a bad marriage for years...and years...and years..
If we hadnt been married I would have got out of it much sooner. Sun Aqua
Moon Cancer
Venus Cappy
Mars Cappy
Asc Leo IP: Logged |
future_uncertain
Knowflake Posts: 193
From:
Registered: May 2009
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posted September 13, 2006 08:36 AM
That being said, I've had a few live-in relationships, and I'm glad that I've gone that route as opposed to marriage.ALSO, although statistics show that couples who live together before marriage are more likely to divorce once married, there are a lot of factors involved in the equation. (I wish I could remember where I recently saw a good article on this...) One factor that I recall is that making a commitment to live together is not the same as making a commitment to share the rest of one's life with someone. However, sometimes these live-in relationships move toward marriage for "practical" reasons (financial or otherwise) and couples who would not ordinarily choose to marry find themselves in a situation where they're married to the wrong partner. Other factors included age of the couple and length of relationship before the decision to live together. Bottom line: although the statistics can be scary, most evidence supports that the reasons for the high divorce rates amongst cohabiting couples don't revolve solely around their decision to live with one another before marriage. ******************************************* That being said, my fiance and I have been together for 2 1/2 years. I'm 29, he just turned 30, and at the beginning of this year we decided we wanted to have a child together, and she's due in 5 weeks! We're engaged to be married next October and in June he moved in. I feel very, very positive about our future! Most important thing is to examine your reasons for wanting to share the rent, realize that doing so and deciding to marry are separate decisions, and that the former does not necessarily result in the latter. Take both decisions one at a time.
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WaterNymph
unregistered
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posted September 13, 2006 09:15 AM
I wouldn’t do it. Maybe semi living with them, otherwise no…I don’t like the idea. Cause once you’re married, it’ll be same old same old - nothing new or special.Pisces/Virgo/Aries/Aries/Pisces
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cat71
unregistered
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posted September 13, 2006 10:26 AM
Future - "Why buy the pig when all you want is a little sausage?" - EXCELLENT!  ------------------
...to have been loved so deeply, even though the person who loved us is gone, will give us some protection forever... IP: Logged |
astro junkie
unregistered
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posted September 14, 2006 02:04 AM
future_uncertain -Good advice, and congratulations. ------------------
... it's better to light a candle than curse the darkness IP: Logged |
Jan_A
unregistered
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posted September 14, 2006 02:32 AM
Why are you so afraid of divorces ? Divorce could be extremely positive. IP: Logged |
future_uncertain
Knowflake Posts: 193
From:
Registered: May 2009
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posted September 14, 2006 10:15 PM
Glad you liked that, Cat71. That's not really my attitude about it, but it does go to show that it can work both ways. Thanks AJ.  Here's a link to one of the articles I read on the topic in Psychology Today. It's pretty insightful. It does a good job of explaining why divorce rates are higher among those who live together before marriage. Certain factors can be avoided if one chooses to pursue this route successfully.
http://www.psychologytoday.com/rss/pto-20050614-000001.html IP: Logged |
future_uncertain
Knowflake Posts: 193
From:
Registered: May 2009
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posted September 15, 2006 03:25 PM
Jan_A... I think you're right-- divorces can be extremely positive. Unfortunately, they usually aren't.Has this happened to you? You sound as though you may be speaking from experience. IP: Logged |
Lindaland
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