|
Author
|
Topic: What exactly is the reason for the attraction?
|
GrlyGirl20
Knowflake Posts: 319
From: USA
Registered: Apr 2009
|
posted September 19, 2006 09:06 AM
  
Hey how are you guys doing? I have a friend, whom I have not known for a more than a little over a month, but we have recently become friends with benefits. This is both very uncharacteristic of our personalities. However, for some reason I am very comfortable with him, a little too comfortable and we both have been opening up with each other despite the fact that our rule was to keep emotions out of it. I'm not quite so sure we can keep emotions out of it. I am also very attracted to him, and there seems to be a lot of attraction, however he insists he doesn’t want a girlfriend…he doesn’t want to be tied down…despite the fact that he craves closeness. The first time we hooked up it seemed to be very random, like he came over to hang out and we ended up being affectionate and then stuff happened. The only problem is that I know I have a mars in cancer which likes guys to be sensitive and I know he's sensitive however he's just not aggressive enough for me. I for some reason like my guys to be aggressive but not crude. It seems like I oscillate between extremes with that. Help I just don't get the situation I'm in...And why does he seem to trust me? Plus he seems so gregarious and outgoing on the outside but so vulnerable and needy when I get him alone. Is there anything in our charts that would explain to this out of know where attraction? Thanks a bunch!My Birthday:
July 3, 1985 Born in Bellflower, Ca at 5:34 am
His Birthday
Dec 1, 1986 Born in Baltimore, Maryland at 12:30 pm IP: Logged |
wilsontc
unregistered
|
posted September 19, 2006 12:19 PM
Grly,Looking at the chart of the relationship (synastry), you have Mars (being, also action) square (energy needs to be combined with) Venus (relationships), indicating there may be a "rush to relate" with each other!  You also have similar connections between each of your Mercuries (thinking, also talking) and Moons (home, also emotions), indicating you can easily emotionally talk with each other. However, you have similar challenging connections between your Venuses and Mercuries, indicating talking about relationships may be stressful in some way. The connections indicate things can be exciting in the short-term but there may be more challenges in working out long-term issues between you. Relating, Tim IP: Logged |
taurean_scorpion
unregistered
|
posted September 19, 2006 12:22 PM
Wow your situation seems very similar to mine...lolWell from what I can see,
He is a Sag/Sag/Pisces with Venus and Mercury in Scorpio in the 8th!
He needs his freedom and closeness at the same time.
I bet he has a knack for making you happy.
He probably has an excellent sense of humor. You're a Cancer/Cappy/Cancer
Very emotionally sensitive and prone to depression...you love anyone that make you smile (duh, who doesn't). However, you don't want someone who's happy go lucky all the time so his Watery placements are good so that you can relate to him. Some aspects that indicates physical attraction, though I'm sure you know this: Your Venus is opposite his.
His Venus conjunct Your Pluto
Your Mars in His 5 house
His Venus in Your 5 house The mental rapport between you two seems to be good but both can be very stubborn in your opinions (fixed signs). There may be some disagreements regarding religion/beliefs. I'm no expert in this so don't believe everything I say lol...Just taking a shot here. Taurus/Scorpio/Cancer IP: Logged |
taurean_scorpion
unregistered
|
posted September 19, 2006 12:22 PM
dpIP: Logged |
Yang
unregistered
|
posted September 19, 2006 12:47 PM
Welcome  IP: Logged |
GrlyGirl20
Knowflake Posts: 319
From: USA
Registered: Apr 2009
|
posted September 20, 2006 07:54 PM
Thanks for the advice...my only question is because he has opened up to me...can he actually detach and not get feelings for me? Or can I? I'm trying to figure out if we can both be adults about this and really stick to our rules about no strings attached friends with benefits? Despite the fact that he doesn't want to seem needy and the fact that he is really affectionate. Or is there too much water that we both will get attached to the other. Thanks  IP: Logged |
OzMeg222
Newflake Posts: 0
From: victoria, australia
Registered: Aug 2009
|
posted September 21, 2006 03:35 AM
Oh gosh I hear your story! Started out that way with the guy I can't help but fall for more and more. Going on 8 months now though, lol. Far too long IMHO for it to be purely physical. We keep saying we should stop seeing each other and we do. He's usually the one to initiate contact again, although he pulls back the closer we get. Its only just starting to come together a bit more in the last few weeks. I haven't seen him for 6 weeks but he's been in contact a lot over the past 4 weeks. I think I like that we're talking without hooking up cos if we do finally get it together properly at least we'll be sure. I have had friends with benefits in the past who I haven't fallen for but this guy just floored me almost from the first second. I thought that because he's younger than me I'd be able to stop myself from falling for him but I can't. We seem to be on an equal playing field in a lot of ways and he is truly more of a man than anyone I've ever known. He's perfect in every way except he's probably too young according to our birth certificates. I sometimes wish I had've stopped seeing him months ago. Something powerful keeps drawing us back together though and now it seems there may be a future there after all. Who knows? I wish you the best of luck with whatever you decide anyway, know that you're definately not alone on this one! IP: Logged |
william
unregistered
|
posted September 21, 2006 10:36 PM
gg20,
this composite show a merginging of the minds,there is a very pyschic element here.you can read each others mind and finish each others sentences,very intense.ythe problem is that the sexual vib is purely instinctual and raw.there is no romantic element,it is all hardcore.with your mental/psychic connect as intense as it is ,one would hope that the sexual would be just as intimate and loving,but it aint.sun conjunct the venus/pluto midpoint in the composite.this is sexual domination not unity,very confusing as the mental is soooo connected.sun/uranus and mercury/uranus midpoints are conjunct pluto.the mental/pyschic again is overpowered by the instinctual doomination.i really haven't looked at your chart,but it may be that this composite is striking a dark chord in you,i don't know.i think you are being controlled.this will continue til late october.then you may get some perspective.you should try to get away for awhile but i know is is unlikely.if you have noticed a dark side in him in the last couple of days....beware.
williamIP: Logged |
OzMeg222
Newflake Posts: 0
From: victoria, australia
Registered: Aug 2009
|
posted September 21, 2006 10:44 PM
William-Yikes! You've scared me now. I wonder if its possible that the feelings I'm having are also more of a purely sexual nature without the romantic side. I feel things for him but I'm not sure if he does too, he gives me mixed messages. Maybe it is a purely physical thing for him. How is that possibility suggested in a synastry/composite chart?
IP: Logged |
darkdreamer
unregistered
|
posted September 22, 2006 01:11 AM
William,I see you looked at the midpoints in the composite charts. That`s an interesting idea.
OzMeg222,
what you wrote about your guy, wow! This is EXACTLY how I feel about my guy, who isn`t mine, but anyway.
However, he`s also younger than me (2 years) and that bothered me a bit. And like you I`ve been telling myself, that i should be able from stopping myself from falling for him, even though sometimes I wonder, if this is only sexual attraction or more. Actually I don`t know exactly WHAT this is, but it feels extremely powerful.
However, I wish you the best of luck for you and your guy. Astrologically speaking I think that purely sexual attractions will be indicated by a focus on sexual planets like venus, mars and Pluto (About Venus I`m not totally sure, she can be very romantic), while aspects to Sun and Moon, especially moon may be missing.
Just my thoughts. DD IP: Logged |
GrlyGirl20
Knowflake Posts: 319
From: USA
Registered: Apr 2009
|
posted September 22, 2006 04:24 PM
I find it strange that it seems that he is intense and oddly weird. When he opened up to me it was something that was very very private that only a few people know...and know he hasn't even contacted me to see how i am or whatever. I have contacted him two times to see if he wanted to hang out and he was busy both times. It's strange that we entered into this aggreement however when he comes over its like were trying to rationalize hanging out and that stuff just happnes accidently. But yeah I have been feeling like our friends with benefits relationship is about his benefits and I am in a way not getting my fair share. I am not sure why I care...its just this attraction to him is very bizarre. And to William we have almost slept together three times and it is very animalistic and raw...almost to the point that its very intense and it scares me but at the same time I kinda want someone who is dark...I don't know. I want to cut him off and not talk to him but I do live in a dorm situation where it would be obvious if I did. William is it possible you look at my chart? Thanks so much.IP: Logged | |
Lindaland
UBBFriend: Email This Page to Someone! 
