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Author Topic:   Help with Cappy and Virgo
Sharon49
unregistered
posted September 24, 2006 11:47 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I am a Sept 6 Virgo and my husband is Dec. 24 Cappy. I fell deeply in love with him almost immediately after meeting him. He was divorced for about 4 years and had a good job and I thought all the right ingredients to make a wonderful blended family. I had a good job that provided for myself and my children. He had 2 teen girls. He was Terribly Blunt as someone said before, by asking to take me to a motel for the night on our first date. I refused and he didn't even call me again. Finally, about a month later I phoned him. He claimed he was busy working. I later found out it was a lie. He was seeing other women in other towns. I was so loney and picky also, and I really felt some big time chemistry from our only date and I was so attracted to him. He made my heart race and I would break out in a deep sweat just being near him. Just when he kissed me or to "accidently" touch me would make my blood race. After our first date, he waited for me to make the next step. I knew I must have sex or never have a chance with him. I wish now I would have Run the other way! I gave in and called him. He took me out to eat and then headed for a Motel. I thought he would litterly kill me with so much sex, but after the shock of it, I realized he was out of this world. My childhood sweetheart had never done to me what this Cappy did. I was 35 at the time, and had been married most of my adult life to my kids Dad. I really got it bad for him. I would not even let my children use the telephone because I didn't want to miss a chance to talk to him if he called. I realized how wrong and unfair to my children I was. He would starve me out and make me call him. I would break down and do it. I would cook good meals and invite him and his younger daughter over to my house to eat. Being on a budget, I would cook good meals and have iced tea for drinks. His daughter would refuse to drink tea, and he would get up and leave the table and run to a nearby store to buy her a coke. He never brought back cokes for my children or myself. This happened often. Finally, I started telling him to bring her a coke as I did not keep them at my house for my children as Every day drinks. He still would not seem to take me serious enough to say anything romantic about us. This continued to roll on for about 6 months and for Christmas I got him a nice sweater and shirt, and he got me an Electric can opener because mine had broken.
Please bare with me, I am so unhappy and need some real advice here.
Naturally, my heart was broken by the Can opener gift, and he bought my kids no gife, although I gave his daughters gifts. The older one, approx. 15 hated me and never even wanted me to stop by the house to see him. She refused to set at the table on one incident when I came in as they were going to eat on night, that he had made meatloaf for them. I noticed all these things, but still kept running after him. I also had other men to show interest in me, and had several that came out and told me they would love to marry me and make a home for me and my children. They were decent men also. I would be friends, but the Cappy had my heart. Time passed on and it started that every day his ex- wife would be at his house each evening. She would come over and cook meals for the KIDS> knowing he was coming in from work and I would see her there. She started telling Cappy that she was unhappy with her new husband, and wanted to leave him and would he help her move out and get an appartment and let her have the girls. OF Course he did. He moved her out and paid up her rent in advance for her and gave her grocerie money for the girls - paid up her car insurance, etc. and so on. This was all breaking my heart, yet he had gotten to where he would call me more and stop by my workforce. I was so saddenly deeply in love with him that I would litterly be ill at times from nerves. His ex-wife would come to my job and tell me how It was Gods will for them to get back together. I didn't know what to do. I held on and within a month of her leaving the best friend that she quit my Cappy for, she had met and moved in with another man that had been trying to date me. It was a crazy obsession with all of us. My Cappy(who wasn't mine at all) would find any kind of excuse to take the girls down to his house, and would even end up staying on one occasion to drink a beer and have barbque with them. This left me waiting for our date. Then the man would come by my workplace and tell me what had happened. He would also tell me of the many many times her car would be at his house during the day when the weather would not permit work for him. All of this was because she was there to wash clothes or Clean up the house for the "girls" -Who by the way had moved back in with him. Lord only knows the money he had given her to start over and divorce the best friend with. This story continued through the lefe of the ex-wife marrying 2 other men and still running back to his house and having a key and being on his checking account. I would say I was through and start dating other men. I would try to get seriously involved, but my heart and body was with Cappy. He was content with his life with a new grandkid and the same old thing as always.l I would often come home from a date and call him. He would be willing to talk and if I said I wanted to see him he would agree, and it would be for a roll in the hay, some great loving, but Never a word of love mentioned. Once, I brough out the sexual chemistry to him and asked him what did it mean to him? He answered, WE got RYthem! I was floored. This man had a deep sexual hold on me and was driving me crazy and knew it. In fact I think he thrived on it. We were so great together that I would actually get soaking wet each time I made love to him, and he sexed it up with me. He never offered to take me or my children on Vacations with him and his girls. They would take trips to Flordia and go on Hellicopter rides, lay on the beach, etc and never ask me or my two children to go. This would make me cry and I was so frail from working and loving him so that I got down to the size that I could wear my 13 year old daughtes clothes. I weighed 110 pounds and was 5'1. I was very pretty then and He was 6'3 weighing about 225. He would put his arm over me and make jestures of love, but never said the word for years. He knew I loved him with all my heart and Never gave me a dime or bought me the first grocries. He did move me into another smaller house that I got in my property settlement of my divorce a couple of years after I was divorced. I had a beautiful Brick home and all furniture I always had, my ex-husband was very good to give me and my chidren everything. He was the one that broke up our marriage and was moving from La. to New York. I was secure in my own home, Yet Cappys ex-wife told his girls that I was after their home for myself and my children.
I am afraid I am going to long, so I will continue this on another post. Please continue to read as I am in desperate need of advice!

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Taurus80
Newflake

Posts: 10
From:
Registered: Apr 2009

posted September 24, 2006 12:13 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Taurus80     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
hi Sharon49..

i wish you were not going through any kind of pain..i think you may need a outlet and someone to talk to, this forum is full of positive people..(i know it's helped me and lots of others)

i wish i could do more..i'm sending you lots of love and good thoughts..

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Belage
Knowflake

Posts: 435
From: California
Registered: Apr 2009

posted September 24, 2006 01:08 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Belage     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Sorry you're going through this.

I am in a blunt mood today. So, here is my advice, said with love:

Completely break up with this man.

Get a good therapist.

Get a vibrator.

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mercurian
unregistered
posted September 24, 2006 01:09 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
wow!! He doesnt sound like a capricorn at all!! Im a virgo as well ...my husband for 7 years is capricorn..i cant find any similarities! My ex boyfriend for 2 years was a capricorn as well...i cant find any similarites either!!So i know them well!

Im sending you my love and support...I wish things will get better for you! I wish i could say and do more..!!

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Sun/Moon/Mercury Virgo 7th House
Ascendant Aquarius

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Sharon49
unregistered
posted September 24, 2006 01:59 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Thank you, I will continue.
I have my own home and love plants and nature so I worked in my yard and has so many flowers and spent a great deal of time outside. I was very tan and in good health. I had tried to back off of Cappy for a while because of the Exwife thing and the way that he never placed me first in his life. I could be at his house, burning inside to be held in his arms, and other women would call him and he would sit and talk to them as I waited and watched TV, hearing him joke and laugh with these other women. We or must I say, I would argue and cry, and threaten to be through, and he would say, "He couldn't hurt the other womans feelings". It seemed not to dent on him that my feeling were being ripped apart. This went on for ever it seemed, and he knew I was dating other men, and he continued to see other women, Knowing how much in Love with him I was. Finally, I called him and laid out my heart to him, and asked him for us to get back together, that I loved and missed him so much. Please let us be together that night. He said he already had plans, but we could go riding on his Three Wheeler the next day, Sunday. He was to come and pick me up about 11:00 the next morning. I waited, no call, no showing up. Finally, near 1:00 I go to his house. Door is open so I go in. In his room I find him dead to the world alseep. I wake him finally. I don't think a bomb would have waken him if I had not shaken him so. He barely pulls himself together enough to go to the bathroom and wash his face. He tells me that he needs a shower and will be over at my house in a while, so I leave. He does arrive finally with his 3 wheeler in the back of his truck. We ride silently to a special area on a River bank and go riding for a few hours. I have to hold on to him and sit behind him. I hold his back so close to my chest with my face against his back, and tears flow down my face. I love him so much and he will not even stop and turn to kiss me. This is about all we do. Once the trails have been rode, he loads up the Wheeler and takes me home. No passionate moments or plans. He states he is tired and has to go home to get his equipment ready for next days work. Days rock by and I am working sick and I mean literally sick. He finally comes in where I work, and will make me shake so that I can hardly think. Everyone knows how in Love with him I am. We sill don't make up, so I have a friend that lives close to him, and decides to introduce him to another lady. They have some visits at his house, and what else I don't know, but I do know that they are spending quiet a bit of time with each other and he relates to me that they were even on the floor together. I call him and crying, seems like it is all I can do, I beg him not to be with her again. He doesn't give me an answer, and I think he will go on with his plans. He does phone her and breaks the date with her. He said it was because he knew that she expected to make their friendhip more that night and he did chose me. I was so happy, I wanted to give my entire life to him and would have to the end at that time. We really start as a couple and then the grandbabies are beginning to be born and the exwife has been through a couple of more husbands and the same old stuff starts happening again. The ex- eife assaults me and follows us to his home, and she attacks me and knocks me completely out. As I regain my abilities again, I start to attack her back and he seperates us and then takes her to her car and tells her to leave. I am so shaken that all I can do is go inside and shake and cry. He does hold me, yet never tells me he loves me or will put a stop to her bothering us. I leave, and the matter is never delt with. The ex- wife has always continued to interfer with our relationship. His Mother even took a cross country trip with her once, and they continue to visit and be friends to this day. She still goes to our Farm that I am half owner of to visit his sisters family that lives there for free in a trailor space that is the Main home Place. When we had been dating and fighting and Loving, for 10 years, I have felt like the talk of the town. There lives have moved on and I say that it is time to marry me or just quit. He suggest just quit, so I have raised my children and they are gone, and I decide I want to have someone to be with me and be a partner with me in my later life. I do find a man that I am compatible with, he adors me, yet I am still unconvinced that I really want to not be with Cappy. I can't help but Phone him, and the cat and mouse starts again. He buys me an engagement ring, but still never will say he loves me or any of the things that my heart so desperately needed to hear. We rock on and it is still the same old game. His kids hate me and don't want me anywhere around him or his home. I stay away from them, yet treat them decently and help any way I can. I had a special frind that I appealed to and got a new brick home sold to his oldest daughter and her husband where there was no other way that this home could have been purchased. She never once invited me to come there or took the time to thank me. Instead she tried to fix her Dad up with her widowed Mother-in law. This daughter has always been walking side by side with her Mother, and they both hate me and hate that I came into Cappys life and broke their bonds of Chains that were tied to them. I Just Never Broke them good enought. She still uses Her life and her children to get anything she wants from her Dad, and is going on with her life as a single woman, at the same age I was when I met her Dad.
After 8 years and no proposal I gave him his ring back. I said I was through. We did still see each other though, and I would beg for my ring back and he would not let me have it for two years. He made the remark that he wanted to make me sweat! I was ready to marry another man and move away when he came on the scene again, and asked me to marry me. I said YES< and was so happy. His 19 Year old youngest daughter came to our simple but lovely wedding at my home and even took photos of us. My daughter was there and my Mother. I asked him to invite his Mother, He declined.
I thought Finally I had my Cappy. Little did I know that at the very moment of our Vows that his ex-wife was moving into his house and slept that night in a bed that I had given him. She moved in with his 19 year old because she was in Nursing School and Cappy had told her she could stay in the house until she finished her training. He would continue to pay all the bills and buy her groceries. So, The daughter took it on herself to invite her Mother to move in and live there without even discussing it with us. We find out several days later, and we go over to visit the daughter, there the exwife is decorating and making it into her home.She had quit her husband and is there to stay. We have bitter conferntation, and I end up leaving in the pouring rain. He comes on over to my house and our trouble starts. Unable to accept again how I am the outsider, I tell him to go back to his life without me if that is what he wants. He takes his clothes and leaves. We are apart for a few months and I start longing for him. WE never got a chance to file our license, but infact I find out later that it is still a legal marriage because the Minister did marry us with License and before many witnesses. Later the license are Recorded, but only because I demand it or I would take him to court. His ex-wife goes around still telling everyone that we are not married. This has played out into 20 years now, and I am still just as much an outsider as ever. I am not listed on his bank accounts as Benificiary, or his C.D.s' or any of his business affairs. He bought my sons farm 2 years after we were married and has let me know that it is his to give to his kids when he dies. He works himself to death trying to pay for it, raising cattle and hay, work his regular job, and keep up all the people and family that he does. His health is failing now, and he cannot work as hard as he once could, so his money has gotten to be a major factor. He does help me to live with some things, but I have to be responsible for my medical expenses. I have had many. During this time I have had to have many surgeries and take expensive meds. I am not nerly as attractive as I was, Heck, I am 57 Years old now. We do not even live together. He rebuilt a little house for his Mother, and she lives on the same land as he does. He feels responsible for her, and takes care of her and she knows more about him and his business than I even start too. He has keys to my home and car, but I have no keys to his. I have ended up having to sell my home to help pay off some debts that my son made. I now live in an appartment, and my Granddaughter lives with me sometimes. I see him a few times a week and we talk each day. He will say that if he can just hear my voice that he is ok. He goes on with his life, has meetings with friends, eats out a lot with them. I stay shut up in my appartment saving every dime I can and taking care of my little soulmate Yorkie dog, Precious. I have no idea what I will do should he pass away, because he will never tell me that he will add me as benificiary to his investments. He destroyed the will that he had made out to me for the Farm that he bought from my son. We can't be together for 1/2 an hour without either his Mama or his sister or brother calling him. We can't even spend one night together without them knowing what time he gets here or what time he will leave. Every Sunday morning is given to his 2 little grandsons on the farm. They are sweet kids, and I know he loves them. Cappy says he wants to give the farm to them and the girls. The Mother of the grandkids he has each Sunday is a Reg. Nurse married to a College Grad. and both have great jobs. They take vacations and are having the joy of life. The other daughter has quit her husband and is just like her Mama with her Man friend and yet Daddy still takes up for her and she is the Main one that was so mean to me, and refered to me as a homewrecker and ***** . He has paid for her children to go to Private schools all through there lives and Now, the younger one is Homeschooling because she is too lazy to take him to School on time. Cappy resents me discussing this with him and quickly will tell me to lay off his kids or his Mama. They are using up his life and there has never been anything but stollen moments for us. I am finally married to him for the last 10 years but still on the outside looking in. MY Hears BREAKS for the Love and Passion that we once had, but because of him and these people I have mentioned, MY life as to what it could have been is destroyed. I am so unhappy and yet I love him still. OUR Fire is gone, Tears well up inside me, I don't know if I can make it without him, I do still love him so. I have read over and over to him the books that Linda wrote. Once, Knowing I loved her so much, he bought me the large book of the Sun Signs. I have read them all page to page. I have shown him how we are the Lovers Card in the book, both of us, and how we have the special and Best to have 5/9 relationship, yet things don't change, except for one thing-- That is time. OUR Season is almost over. For everything there is a Time and a Season. A purpose for everything in Heaven. These are LINDA'S words from her book. I don't know how much longer I can go on, and I don't know if I can go on without him. I am so alone. MY children are all gone on and moved away and my Parents have been long passed away. He still has both parents alive, brothers, sisters, Close cousins, friends. They all have kept me shut out because he never made them accept me. Where will I look to except the Heavens to help me. Does anyone have any Real and Sincere Advice for me. I am almost ready to give up the fight. It has been constant for 20 years and I don't see it changing. Please someone feel my pain and help me to go on in Which direction? I am Sharon - the true Virgo! FEEL MY PAIN,

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mercurian
unregistered
posted September 24, 2006 02:51 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Dear Sharon!
Im 29 and you are 57 years old..I dont have your own life experience! What kind of advice I could give you??
Im sorry that you went through all these...He was not for you ...you were not for him...This is what i can understand from all this!!

Thanks for sharing....I wish you the best!

------------------
Sun/Moon/Mercury Virgo 7th House
Ascendant Aquarius

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Belage
Knowflake

Posts: 435
From: California
Registered: Apr 2009

posted September 24, 2006 06:57 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Belage     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Sharon, from a Virgo to another: Stop the madness. You're addicted to a toxic man, you're in a toxic relationship. If you stay in it, NOTHING GOOD WILL COME OUT OF IT.

There is help out there, in the form of therapy. Please, please, get some help. Most healthy women would have kicked this joker to the curb a long time ago, therefore, the problem is NOT in him. The problem is in you. There is a something in you that draws you into this madness and keeps you in it. That something needs healing, and it is not unfixable. Get some help in the form of therapy. It's not too late to reclaim your life.

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mercurian
unregistered
posted September 24, 2006 07:47 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I agree with Belage!
It has to stop!

------------------
Sun/Moon/Mercury Virgo 7th House
Ascendant Aquarius

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lotusheartone
unregistered
posted September 24, 2006 08:04 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Sharon..simply..you he should respect you..
but he doesn't..because you have accepted all his negative treatment..therefore..he continues..he gets his cake..and eats it too!

You have gone beyond the call of duty..been humbled..humiliated by his treatment..
Respect and LOve YourSelf First..or you cannot Love another...
if someone does not respect you..you need not
be in their company...it's your choice...

Be Strong..Sending you LOts of LOve and Light..and then the Magic will follow..

We all LOve you..LOve YourSelf..for the wonderful person you are. ...

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lotusheartone
unregistered
posted September 24, 2006 09:01 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Sharon..how would you feel if one of your children were in this kind of marriage relationship?

You must make a stand..you've stood by your man..now..if he isn't willing to meet you have way..and make amends..you must be willing to move on...You deserve to be Loved and Love..
in an equal partnership..with Respect. ...

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and
unregistered
posted September 24, 2006 09:04 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
What year were you both born? time of birth/cities of birth....

your story touched my heart, you have a good heart, i sense that, get away from this man...

------------------
"WHATEVER the soul longs for, WILL be attained by the spirit"

"Love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation"

-Khalil Gibran

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Sharon49
unregistered
posted September 24, 2006 10:42 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
My reply as to when I was born is Sept. 6, 1949, at 12:15AM.
His birthday is Dec. 24, 1944 - NOT certain as to when.
Both were born in Bastrop, La. USA

I really need help. I am dying inside.

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and
unregistered
posted September 24, 2006 11:01 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote

Sharon- If you want to talk(astrological wise, or personally) you can email me at my email address on my profile(above)...


Virgo's Moon sextile Capricorn's Moon:

Your emotional styles are compatible, allowing you both to feel you can be yourselves. Even the
way you experience "down time" is in harmony, so you can rejuvenate in each other's presence.
You speak the same emotional language and likely feel that you "get" each other at a deep level.

Virgo's Venus trine Capricorn's Venus:

Your values and tastes in life are in harmony and this makes it easy to enjoy each other's company.
From music, to food, to love's sweet embrace, you find many ways to enjoy your life together.

Virgo's Jupiter trine Capricorn's Jupiter:

You will have plenty of opportunities to find mutually rewarding activities. Your philosophies about
living life support one another. Traveling, education, and spiritual explorations all provide avenues
of growth for the relationship.

Virgo's Saturn sextile Capricorn's Saturn:

You solve life's difficult situations in a supportive manner, allowing you to appreciate each other's
help and assistance. You are able to learn from life together, and thus can avoid making the same
mistakes over and over again.

Virgo's North Node square fNAM's North Node:

Your life paths are at odds with each other. Your personal histories don't promote a natural
empathy for what you each have experienced in the past. Making assumptions about each other
based on your past experiences always leads to trouble. It is best to treat each other as if you were
both raised in separate foreign cultures. This will help you avoid all the troubles that come from
taking things for granted about each other that aren't part of the other person's experience at all.

Virgo's Chiron sextile Capricorn's Chiron:

You are naturally empathic toward each other's deep sensitivities and support each other's efforts
toward healing.

Capricorn's Sun trine Virgo's Saturn:

You have patience with each other and can work well together either professionally or when
sharing life's responsibilities. You can even be patient with each other's "bad" days. You learn from
your experiences together and typically don't make the same mistakes twice with each other.

Capricorn's Sun sextile Virgo's Moon:

A natural flow exists in the relationship with your energies naturally supporting one another. Virgo
feels safe to drop defenses and be at ease around Capricorn's natural energy, allowing Capricorn
to feel accepted and appreciated.

Capricorn's Sun opposition Virgo's Uranus:

This tie creates a strong fascination, but is considered unstable. Your wills can clash over the
slightest of issues, as you both absolutely resist either of your attempts to take charge in the
relationship. The relationship requires a great deal of freedom to make room for this aspect.

Virgo's Sun square Capricorn's Mars:

This tie is extremely intense and often confrontational. It is passionate, without a doubt, and very
favorable in some arenas, but arguments and battles of wills can be passionate as well. If you can't
take the heat, get out of the kitchen, with this one. You can inflame each other, and without
restraint or healthy outlets, things could turn bad.

Capricorn's Sun square Virgo's Mercury:

Communication difficulties arise because of the angular nature of your perspective on issues. You
see things differently and must allow for this if the relationship is to flourish. Otherwise, petty
arguments could arise over how things are said to each other.


Virgo's Moon trine Capricorn's Saturn:

You work well together on both the personal and professional fronts. Capricorn gives steadiness
and patience to the relationship. Virgo adds emotional support to Capricorn's efforts in the world
of responsibility.

Virgo's Moon sextile Capricorn's Mercury:

Communication over personal issues is favored. You can always depend on each other for
understanding when needed, and this brings clarity into your lives.

Capricorn's Moon sextile Virgo's Ascendant:

You feel at ease and comfortable in each other's presence. This relaxed flow between the two of
you allows you to spend considerable time with each other.

Capricorn's Moon opposition Virgo's Venus:

Emotional issues are quite tricky to resolve. When one of you expresses emotional needs, the other
person's feelings get hurt. Or you get your feelings hurt when the other person is simply having a
bad day. It is hard not to take the other person's emotional issues personally, but that is exactly
what can improve your relationship.

Capricorn's Moon square Virgo's Mars:

This aspect often leads to a stormy emotional tie. Capricorn is always on edge and feels threatened
by Virgo's energy. Capricorn's emotional responses irritate Virgo. Without restraint, this can be a
wounding combination.

Capricorn's Moon square Virgo's Jupiter:

You tend to encourage each other's indulgent behavior. There can be excessive emotional
reactions over small issues that get blown way out of proportion.

Virgo's Mercury conjunct Capricorn's Neptune:

This leads to a mystical, nearly psychic connection between the two of you. Mutual interests in
mysticism, spirituality, and artistic pursuits are favored. Worldly issues and practical concerns are
not so favored. In these issues, it is best to compensate for this imaginative combination by making
sure that you are not seeing potential that doesn't really exist.

Virgo's Mercury conjunct Capricorn's Chiron:

You support each other's interests in alternative healing, and provide each other with insights into
the significance of your past wounds.

Virgo's Mercury trine Capricorn's Venus:

This creates a stimulating spark in your exchanges as you both enjoy each other's personality.
Virgo communicates in a way that Capricorn enjoys, and thus friendship and romance are favored.
Creative outlets are also favored, although any relationship and any activity would benefit from this
delightful combination.

Virgo's Mercury trine Capricorn's Uranus:

You two are excellent at looking at issues from a fresh perspective and coming up with innovative
ideas for dealing with situations. Your communications stay lively as you encourage a "discovery"
attitude in each other. The ideas that you come up with together most often have relevance and
application in your lives.

Virgo's Mercury sextile Capricorn's Pluto:

This tie is favorable for pursuing mental activities together, and you feel safe with each other in
taking conversations to a deep, intimate level. You likely feel comfortable revealing personal
secrets to each other.

Capricorn's Mercury opposition Virgo's Uranus:

A tension exists in your communications with each other. Virgo wants Capricorn to change the way
Capricorn thinks about something in a way that is inconceivable to Capricorn. Capricorn can feel
Virgo is a disruptive, unruly influence, and Virgo can view Capricorn as narrow-minded and stuck
in conventional thinking.

Capricorn's Mercury opposition Virgo's Ascendant:

Misunderstandings are not uncommon with this aspect, as you both tend to misinterpret each
other's attempts at communication. Avoid this potential for misunderstanding by double-checking
important communications with each other.

Virgo's Mercury square Capricorn's Saturn:

This aspect creates a challenge in maintaining easy, flowing communication with each other,
because Virgo feels intimidated by Capricorn's judgments. This fear of disapproval restricts the
natural flow of conversation. There is a tendency to bring out each other's pessimistic and negative
attitudes. This can be compensated for, but there would have to be a rule: No criticizing each
other. Otherwise, this combination is a tough one.

Capricorn's Venus trine Virgo's Neptune:

This aspect brings a refined energy into your relationship, and you become sensitive to the subtle
realms of your energy with each other. A peaceful feeling flows between the two of you, and you
can enjoy the arts, music, and spiritual activities together.

Virgo's Venus sextile Capricorn's Mars:

There is very favorable magnetic flow between the two of you that could best be described as
delightful. This creates an energetic spark that is well received by both of you. You are skilled at
keeping this spark of magnetism alive long into your relationship.

Capricorn's Venus sextile Virgo's North Node:

Your values and tastes are in harmony with one another, and you are naturally attracted to activities
that lead to mutual soul growth.

Capricorn's Venus opposition Virgo's Pluto:

Karmic patterns of manipulating each other in love, either through guilt or intimidation, must be
dealt with in your relationship. Strong passion can exist between the two of you, but intimacy will
elude you until you are both able to let go of control and surrender to the relationship.

Virgo's Venus square Capricorn's North Node:

Your tastes, both in terms of pleasure and soul-growth activities, are not in synch with each other.
Since neither of you values the other person's taste in clothes, style, art, beauty, and social
activities, this aspect has a diminishing effect on the magnetism between you.

Capricorn's Mars trine Virgo's Pluto:

You draw hidden strength from each other and thus are great allies for one another. You inspire
each other to the right use of will and power in ways that benefit everyone. You feel safe with each
other, from the physical activities of Mars, to the deep mysteries of Pluto's interests.

Capricorn's Mars trine Virgo's North Node:

You keep each other current with the times and on track with your soul growth. You give each
other courage to move forward, away from the path of least resistance and toward growth.

Virgo's Mars sextile Capricorn's Jupiter:

You bring out a confident and positive attitude in each other, allowing you to work and play well
together. You also travel well together and encourage each other to take part in the opportunities
life has to offer.

Virgo's Mars sextile Capricorn's Chiron:

You give each other strength and courage to move toward healing old wounds. You provide strong
support for each other in your chosen directions of health care.

Virgo's Jupiter opposition Capricorn's North Node:

The past-life karma of this relationship is Virgo having been a teacher or benefactor for Capricorn
in a past life. When you first met each other, it was likely a positive experience, and getting to
know each other is facilitated by the trust that has already been established.

Capricorn's Jupiter square Virgo's Ascendant:

Many disagreements can erupt because your basic beliefs about so many life issues are at odds
with each other. These arguments aren't so hot as to be threatening, with Jupiter involved, but
Virgo can experience Capricorn 's beliefs about education, religion, and politics to be way off base.

Capricorn's Saturn conjunct Virgo's Uranus:

The best of this aspect is when you help each other to be innovative in how you handle worldly
responsibilities. You can assist each other in adapting to changes in the world and evolving your
careers to stay in line with your needs for discovery. The low road manifests when Capricorn
resists the innovative ideas of Virgo, believing them to be unrealistic and irresponsible, and Virgo
judges Capricorn as being stuck in convention and unwilling to experiment in life.

Capricorn's Saturn conjunct Virgo's Ascendant:

Capricorn is a natural authority for Virgo; thus, this is a favorable tie for parent-child,
employer-employee, and teacher-student relationships, when Capricorn is the authority. There is a
strong commitment and sense of loyalty that comes with this tie, but Virgo can feel oppressed by
Capricorn unless this authority is handled wisely and the hammer of disapproval is used sparingly.


Virgo's Saturn square Capricorn's Uranus:

There is tension from Virgo wanting to maintain the status quo and Capricorn wanting change.
Virgo feels Capricorn is a loose cannon and disruptive to what is going on. Capricorn becomes
frustrated by Virgo's narrow thinking.

Capricorn's Saturn square Virgo's Neptune:

You tend to feed each other's doubts and fears, eroding each other's strength. When a cycle of
doubt comes over the two of you, it feeds on itself, and soon everything can look bad. This misuse
of the imagination needs to be addressed as if it were a test. Discipline needs to be developed to
block these negative wanderings of the imagination.

Capricorn's Uranus trine Virgo's Neptune:

There is a creative flow between Capricorn's intuition and Virgo's ability to image. This sets up a
favorable flow of spiritual guidance that comes to the two of you spontaneously through
coincidences and sudden knowing.


Capricorn's Uranus opposition Virgo's Chiron:

Here, we have two rebels with two different causes. An example would be two people who both
rebelled against traditional health care and found their own, but different, alternative paths. Until
you can honor these differences, the tendency to look at each other's path as eccentric at best, and
as having little merit, will certainly be felt as challenging.

Virgo's Uranus square Capricorn's Neptune:

Virgo looks at Capricorn as being spaced-out. Capricorn sees Virgo as a rebel without a cause.
You force each other to examine outdated fads to which you might each be still attached. At a
higher level, you force each other to examine the effectiveness of your spiritual techniques and
encourage each other to rebel against empty practices that need to be adapted or let go.

Virgo's Neptune sextile Capricorn's Pluto:

Your interactions with each other invariably help you both rise above the petty, lower currents of
reality. If you attempt to meditate together, you will feel as if you are being lifted up on unseen
wings.

Capricorn's Neptune sextile Virgo's Chiron:

You two have an intuitive awareness of the role of imagination in healing. You can work with each
other in the subtlest realms of spiritual and vibrational healing. You intuitively understand the power
of prayer in healing work with each other.

Capricorn's Neptune square Virgo's Ascendant:

A lack of clarity between the two of you can cloud the relationship. You likely misinterpret each
other, and difficulties arise over illusions that one or both of you have about each other and the
relationship. Honesty is essential, even if conflict erupts; better to deal with the issues and stay clear
than to pretend there aren't any issues and remain in illusion.

Virgo's Neptune square Capricorn's North Node:

You are working through karmic patterns of deception and the tendency to lead each other down
paths that ultimately lead to disillusionment. It is important for both of you to compensate for this
potential blind spot in your relationship by checking within your own heart of hearts for clarity
before following each other's lead.

Capricorn's Pluto trine Virgo's Chiron:

Powerful healing energy flows between the two of you, particularly if you are blessed with an
intimate relationship, as this would bring sexual healing. You draw hidden strength just from being
in each other's presence, and together you are unknowingly a powerful healing force in other
people's lives.

Virgo's Ascendant square Capricorn's Chiron:

You have difficulty understanding each other's wounds and sensitivities, and thus tend to judge
each other as being indulgent and weak, where instead you could offer support and acceptance.

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lotusheartone
unregistered
posted September 24, 2006 11:17 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
That is so nice of you "and"..your name is funny...

Looks like this could go either way..LOve Conquers ALL...

karma. ...

Sharon..focus on you..and do things that make you happy..some ME time..nature..tune yourSelf..within..and Listen...
You must be able to be happy alone..in order to enjoy the re-union..be happy independently..

Have you read Gooberz?

Lots of healing LOve to you. ...

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Sharon49
unregistered
posted September 25, 2006 12:35 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I have read all the post and really appriciate everyones imput. I can't understand all of it. I know it would be best to leave him, should have years ago. I do love him, and wish some problems were able to be worked out. If not, I am definately fileing for divorce and then It will be some trouble. That worried me!

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wilsontc
unregistered
posted September 25, 2006 01:58 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Sharon,

You have in your birth chart Libra (relationships) modifying Neptune (spirituality, also idealization) conjunct (energy is combined with) Venus, indicating you tend to idealize your relationships. You have Uranus (friends) square (energy needs to be combined with) Venus, indicating you want to be "friends" in relationships, close but not TOO close. You also have Jupiter (expansion) focused in the 7th house (relationships), indicating you may be over-optimistic (expansive) in your relationships.

In his birth chart he has Pluto (transformation, also control) opposite (energy is over-excited by) Venus, indicating he may have a "control or be controlled" attitude toward relationships. He has Aquarius (friends) modifying Venus, indicating he, too, doesn't like to get TOO close in relationships. Since we don't have a time, we don't know which planets fall into which houses.

His Mars (being, also action, anger) conjunct (energy is combined with) Mercury (thinking, also talking) conjunct Sun (self-expression) energy conjuncts your Descendant (others), indicating he may express himself to you with angry talking/yelling. His Saturn (duty, also restriction) conjuncts your Ascendant (self), indicating he may restrict you.

All this you know...and now astrology has confirmed it. So maybe now you have vented your anger and accepted that the relationship is not "ideal" you can make the change that you know you need to make in your life.

Relating,

Tim

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Sharon49
unregistered
posted September 27, 2006 11:56 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Thank you Tim for the information. I am going to try to find out his birth time. I will get back to you, Friends, Sharon

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Missa
Newflake

Posts: 14
From:
Registered: Dec 2009

posted September 27, 2006 12:29 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Missa     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Don't you have any respect for yourself? That relatioship is based on anything but love, as love always means respect - and he doesn't seem to respect you, and unfortunately you don't seem to respect yourself either. You could have something much better, but you have to leave that behind first.

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Natural111
unregistered
posted September 27, 2006 03:58 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Woe, Sharon. I'm a Virgo, and I know what you're feeling. I have my own long story. And by reading your post, I can see that you KNOW better. And, it sounds like your attachment to him is more obsession than love. It's not love. You should tally up everything he's done to make you love him. You'll probably get nothing but for some reason obsession can feel like love. You know, Sharon, good sex is not what love makes. All those years, didn't you want to be showered with the goodness of the man you loved? For what ever reason he treated you the way he did. And you wrote something that informed me that he knew what he was doing. You said something about how he wanted to make you sweat it out. That's the mind game that LOSERS play. And can be fatal when a Virgo runs into such a loser. Fatal. But, really, those are his issues. I can tell you what I did. It's the Virgo path. The first thing I did when I came to the realization that I was obsessed and not in love is admit it. But that's hard, huh? Because at that point, you've told him, and everyone around you that you loved him. And you've even convinced yourself. It's like finding a man guilty from possibly seeing him in the ally in the dark with your glasses off. There's no evidence to support he's done it other than a questionable witness. Basically, there's no evidence to support that you really love him. NONE. Because the truth is, you DON'T love him. He hasn't done a thing to make you love him. You love your children. parents. close freinds. They all treat you like you matter. It's a give and take. You'v'e let "fabricated" love decieve. And that's what sex can be if you're not in true love. That's why they call it "making love". And just reading the history on how you two had sex, let me know that's where your fabricated feelings came from. This is how it works. It was so good. You saw so much passion in the act with him. You were convinced you love him and he HAS to love you. It's hard place to be, and you'll wonder how you'll get past it. All of your emotions and mind is tied up in it. The light is so far away. But, bear with me hear. Next, what happened to me was God sent. I spent a weekend with a friend/lover and realized that he was honest with me, gentle, we could talk, respected me, and we genuinely liked each other as people. It was all honest. I then, realized, though he and I are on completely different paths, I want a man who respects me like that. And guess what, I saw none of that in the guy who had me all twisted up in knots, playing with my head, my heart. Cause really, guys know when to move on. If they stay, they're getting some sort of gratification from it and it's not benefitting you. And, really, just hearing your story, let me know that these guys never change. He was playing the game in his 30's and he's still playing in his 50's. Wow. Pathetic. So, thank you for letting me see that. But, Sharon, sweetheart, when you are going to let yourself change? Free yourself? You owe it to yourself? To find the beauty that you lost within and without of you? It's a challenge, and I challenge you to do that :-)

Much love to you.... My heart goes out to you... Your story
brought tears to my eyes, because I saw your heart and you don't deserve it. YOU JUST DON'T DESERVE IT. So, please realize you don't love him, you are obsessed and heal.

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scorpluv
unregistered
posted September 27, 2006 04:11 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Sharon... Boobie, this man only cares about himself!! He's still in love with his ex and won't open up to a woman in that way ever again... For him, you are comfortable and convenient... Last time that I checked your a human being, not some blankie for him to cuddle when its convenient for him... Mama, liberate yourself and love yourself above all else... Turn to God in this time of need and he will make it right... Just remember to put him first and all will come into place... Just cause your older doesn't mean you don't have appeal.. But you gotta love yourself first before you can move on... If you'd like my advice... WALK OUT NOW!!! Believe me, you may have lost him but it is you that you will find in the end.... Love, love, love, love, love and God Bless...

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pidaua
Knowflake

Posts: 67
From: Back in AZ with Bear the Leo
Registered: Apr 2009

posted September 27, 2006 04:46 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for pidaua     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
It is very easy for us to say run away- leave him- be your own person - But doing it is another matter isn't it Sharon?

You are in a small town and I think you must have to see him and his friends / family quit often which is why you have shut yourself up in your apartment.

You are faced with a difficult choice. Do you stay and remain a shut in or do you relocate? I believe the latter may be impossible in your situation so you have to stay BUT, you do NOT have to be a shut in.

I do not know of your situation as far as money or work. But if you are able to work, get out there, get into the world and be true to yourself. Make your son start paying your for the debt that you rescued him from. Sue your "husband" for the farm. He bought it after you got married, you are thereby half owner and it has been in your family for years. You can make a case for getting it back minus the cattle and expenses he has put in - tell the judge you will forgo suing him for half his retirement and you'll take a reduced spousal support.

If not and you don't want the land - sell it. Take the profit and start a new life.

There are tons of options if you stop letting this man rule your heart and soul. Capricorns can either be wonderful people or severe womanizers. I have watched my own Capricorn father swing from one extreme to the other, only to finally be a human again.

Capricorn men feel an obligation to their mothers and children. The ex, no matter how horrid she is was right- it was somebodies will that she and he never part. Some kind of Karmic connection that will keep those two together, which was obvious the first year you were with him, the 10th year and the current situation. He will feel obliged to help her because SHE is the mother of his children.

YOU may feel outraged that he did not care for your kids as he did his own. The operative words "HIS OWN" Capricorn men are not known for their fondness to adopt another man's children. Some may if the woman's ex is out of the picture and the kids are young enough.

It sounds like this Capricorn was a narcissist and not capable of a real connection. I am sure it had to be heartwrenching for you to deal with this, but now is the time to stop the cycle or learn to accept it.

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Sharon49
unregistered
posted September 28, 2006 06:52 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Everyone has been so kind to offer up advice. This is what I have been telling myself for years. I don't know what I will ever do in my situation. My Granddaughter that lives with me is in her first year of Nursing school and hasn't got anywhere else to go. I do not work anymore, and my health is not good. I do get a small investment check each month to live on, but nothing like I really need. I will admit that I am afraid to sue him for anything because he has threatened me that he would never pay out again to anyone like he did his ex-wife. Even though I have been married to him for over 10 years, He still holds me in reserve. I just don't understand why he let a Love like we had just drift away. Only time and the good advise I have had will make a way for me. Don't think I haven't really taken every word to heart. I know you are all so right. Thank you and please keep me in your prayers and thoughts. Sharon

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sthenri
unregistered
posted September 28, 2006 08:26 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Maybe this man only respects what he has to work for and win, that is why he gives so much to the ex wife. If a woman were to sue him, he would probably complain at first and then give in and love her for it.

It could very well be he is used to hardship and being mistreated and does it in return. Since it's too late to change how you love someone, do take him to court and do expect something to live on because you are already thinking about it and being the practical virgo you are, know it's the only thing to do. Whether or not you get help to do it or not is the real question.

Since I am like you in some ways, with a sixth house taurus sun, I can tell you I never made a big decision alone. That's not a failing. Grab someone, anyone close to you and make that person watch you do what you need to do. Get your support and you can start over. It's not half as hard as what you are dealing with now.

Keep getting support for your decisions, it's how some of us live, with love and support like plants and flowers.

Some people like your husband, do not need real love.

One day you will be rewarded, maybe not with a lover or husband but with lots of love.

Good luck, and start over, it's not hard as long as it's not too far away. Plus there are LOTS of good men out there, you've been deprived.

Thank you for your story, it's timely for me!
I've got a big virgo stellium, and lots of hard neptune aspects! Starting over is a lifesaver.

Natasha
Taurus/6th house Sun

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silverstone
unregistered
posted October 01, 2006 02:22 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Pidaua...

DANG! Remind me not to make you mad on a thread

BEARTHELEO.... ARRRGh, don't make the Saggi Mad, she'll kick everyone's A$$ for you in the long run, anyway You really don't need to be a Leo with her She's a keeper!

Silverstone will loose the stone with you in a battle.... LOL!

But I do agree with you, Pidaua. Sharon49, you shouldn't put up with this IDIOT! Go kick his A$$

------------------
The only other sound's the sweep
Of easy wind and downy flake.

The woods are lovely, dark and deep.
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep.- Robert Frost~

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Sharon49
unregistered
posted October 01, 2006 03:44 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I have heard everyword written to me. As I was thinking of this today, I thought of him with his Grandkids since it is Sunday. He never made his kid or even the Grandkids Call me Ms. Sharon. To this very day my children refer to him as Mr. Kerry. They have always welcomed him into anything that was going on in our lives, as they knew it was in respect for me. I think he is just plain Ignorant and doesn't try to have manners unless it suits his purpose. I am getting stronger each day. Thanks again, Sharon

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