posted October 02, 2006 09:00 PM              

---

Me and a friend were talking about the act of "chasing" a love interest. Many people including on this forum seem to have troubles when trying to chase someone that they desire and want to try to make it work or think there is a secret formula.

I was thinking about animals in the wild. What animal likes to be chased? NONE.

Animals perceive being chased as a threat. They fear being killed.

Yet humans will chase one another in this game of so called love in order to "get" their desired prospect.

If you think about it: Would YOU want to be chased?

I know I wouldn't.

I have always felt that I have pursued most the men in my life. But I realize there is a time to back off when someone feels like they are being chased. It makes any sane person feel uncomfortable like you become a threat to them.

This reminds me of a poem someone once told me:

"Love is like a butterfly. If you go around chasing the butterfly you will never catch it. But if you sit back and relax, the butterfly will come land right on your nose when you least expect it."

and one by Thoreau on happiness (which I believe you can replace happiness with "love" with as well and it has the same meaning) . . .

"Happiness (Love) is like a butterfly: the more you chase it, the more it will elude you. But if you turn your attention to other things, it will come and sit softly on your shoulder."

IP: Logged

posted October 03, 2006 12:38 AM              

---

Do I like being chased? I like it... when I like the person back. Otherwise it's stalking. I do too feel like I'm the one doing all the pursuing when I'm interested in someone. I kinda find that guys nowadays are quite mellow... or maybe because I'm too intense? I don't know. I don't feel like I'm intense. Yet somehow guys are afraid to come forward when it comes to romantic relationship. If it's just a buddy thingy, they tease me like there's no tomorrow.

I don't like it when I become a threat to someone, I somehow can feel it, and it's not a good feeling. I think it's my Aries Moon. It's like, when I really like something, I'll never give up on it. I want to keep him forever. Hmm. Maybe I need a guy who can be as aggressive as me to make me taste my own medicine.

IP: Logged

posted October 03, 2006 02:05 AM              

---

I would only like to be 'pursued' if I was also 'pursueing the pursuer', if you know what I mean. But I concur that love should indeed be treated as one would treat a butterfly. I would go further to say that the state of rest and ease that is necessary for the butterfly to approach is in fact a state of unconditional love for oneself..or should be for true love to come along.

Wednesday, I also get that feeling when I am becomeing a threat to someone..except it is usually my cancer moon that is doing all the 'clinging'!

love,
TMC

IP: Logged

posted October 03, 2006 03:12 AM              

---

just have to ask.. for personal reasons... why is your name wednesday?

as far as being chased goes...i say... yay! but, on the otherside of the equation... it can get old.

IP: Logged

posted October 03, 2006 08:06 AM              

---

Hey mysticme74,
Wednesday is my middle name, but in French (Mercredi). Needless to say I was born on Wednesday.
Why, do you have some experience with Wednesday?

IP: Logged

posted October 03, 2006 08:19 AM              

---

quote:

---

Happiness (Love) is like a butterfly: the more you chase it, the more it will elude you.

---

But of course!!

IP: Logged

posted October 03, 2006 09:04 AM              

---

Everyone's afraid of something, that's how you know you care about things, when you're afraid you'll lose them.
-- The Bodyguard

IP: Logged

posted October 03, 2006 03:40 PM              

---

oh i love being chased! (by someone i like of course!)

i HATe doin the pursuing cos i over do it sometimes, especially if i've just come out a relationship and still feel insecure. i think chasing is a man thing to be honest...maybe i'm old-fashioned but it just feels better

------------------
*Leo Girl*

IP: Logged

Posts: 174
From: the city so nice they named it twice!
Registered: Apr 2009

posted October 03, 2006 06:50 PM            

---

That is something I had to learn to mellow out on, sometimes I chased guys too way much. It really just depends on the person though and what qualities they want(some men are passive), some guys I've known don't mind being pursued and chased while others feel vunerable and can't stand when a woman is a cougar all over them

IP: Logged

posted December 15, 2006 09:43 AM              

---

lol I don't like it when a guy chases me, I mean it's okay after I have chased him for a bit, but if I don't get to start out chasing first then I usually don't have an interest. But let me start the chase first and have it go back and forth and meow! But then again I have Venus in Aries, sitting back and wiggling my rear like a kitten and pouncing on my prey when they least expect it is what I do best lol :P

IP: Logged

posted December 15, 2006 09:48 AM              

---

quote:

---

"Love is like a butterfly. If you go around chasing the butterfly you will never catch it. But if you sit back and relax, the butterfly will come land right on your nose when you least expect it."

---

I love this quote. Story of my life, haha...
I still haven't quite worked out this conundrum, because butterflies don't land on your nose all the time, no! If love is like a butterfly, it sways with the wind. And, and... when it lands, it flies away again when disturbed. How elusive. you can never catch it!

------------------
The kingdom of Heaven lies within - J.C

IP: Logged

Posts: 0
From:
Registered: Sep 2009

posted December 15, 2006 09:57 AM            

---

Capricorn say: "chasing=childish games"

K.

IP: Logged

posted December 15, 2006 10:50 AM              

---

i agree with kindjali

IP: Logged

posted December 15, 2006 01:59 PM              

---

I hate being chased (I feel like the guy is seriously being disrespectful if he is), and I don't like doing any chasing either. What I like, and it did work, is for one or the other to just come out into the open about liking the other, and seeing what happens. If nothing does, then do nothing. A Sag/Pisces mentioned to me he was very interested, I told him I was not sure about anything at that moment and he just waited patiently till I came back around to him and said ready.

IP: Logged

posted December 15, 2006 02:24 PM              

---

Leo say: "Chasing is all fun and games"

IP: Logged

posted December 15, 2006 02:29 PM              

---

I agree with karmafx too

IP: Logged

posted December 15, 2006 02:41 PM              

---

haha good one

they're not mutually exclusive ideas. though there is a subtle difference i think. at least in outlook, if nothing else.

IP: Logged

Posts: 0
From:
Registered: Sep 2009

posted December 15, 2006 02:47 PM            

---

Chasing is waste of energy and suspending of passion and emotions....I like direct woman, like Cap and Taurus ladies.
At the end we have better chase...the one it happens in bEd

IP: Logged

posted December 15, 2006 02:51 PM              

---

I hate being chased and I don't chase either. I'm a very straight-talk, cards-on-the-table kind of person. I distrust men who lay the charm on thick, and I resent guys who can't take NO for an answer.

That butterfly quote is a lot like me - no surprise seeing butterflies are associated with Gemini. I don't want to be chased, much less caught. But if you let me approach you on my own terms, I just might surprise you and hang around for a bit.

IP: Logged

Posts: 250
From: The Strand
Registered: Apr 2009

posted December 15, 2006 03:02 PM            

---

Aqu with Sag Venus and Gem Mars says: "chasing is required to keep this Aqu in one spot"

(I need to pursued, I never chase. To me, chasing is akin to giving control over someone else, it shows how much you like them, I like being cool and I feel in control when I am chased. Alas, I am old and in a permanent, these things are a faded memory to me now)

IP: Logged

posted December 15, 2006 03:07 PM              

---

Pisces says: chasing is futile, it’s better to ambush

IP: Logged

Posts: 0
From:
Registered: Sep 2009

posted December 15, 2006 03:09 PM            

---

23, what happens when chaser gets tired?

IP: Logged

Posts: 108
From:
Registered: Oct 2009

posted December 15, 2006 03:17 PM            

---

Personally,as a sag, if someone chases me I keep running away and that person loses his attractiveness for me. However I like to chase and catch

IP: Logged

posted December 15, 2006 03:18 PM              

---

Cappy with venus in cappy and mars in aqua says: chasing is fun, esp whn on both sides...tht's whn it becomes a game
but never for ego boosting or out of desperation, this girl can spot tht in a minute, and tends to freak out.

*edit* lets not call it chasing...tht somehow sounds like stalking. but for me if the guy is too direct, its no fun...there has to be an intial period of flirting and games

IP: Logged

Posts: 250
From: The Strand
Registered: Apr 2009

posted December 15, 2006 03:19 PM            

---

K - I give them a little chocolate bar and then start it up again.

IP: Logged