posted December 17, 2006 08:31 PM              

I have had feelings for a friend for almost 8 months. But today he said something, that made me realize just how unfeeling he actually is. And poof! I am over him! Its really weird! It was the same with my last relationship. The guy was the one who broke up with me, (which my ego cud not handle ), for almost a year i cud not imagine how i wud go on without him. tried to be 'friends' with him and what not! And then one day, i suddenly realized tht he reeeally doesnt care about me. and within a week i was almost fine. Its like suddenly my feelings turned off. And i was over him.

So does it happen to you? How long is your 'getting over' phase? Esp when the relationship had been a significant one. Do your feelings end suddenly or do they linger on for a long time, or do they just fade away? And wht astrological factor do u think is responsible for that?

I blame it on my moon/gemini and uranus/5th.

posted December 17, 2006 08:48 PM            

When you wrote about “suddenly” realizing that he really doesn’t care about you, I thought “transiting Moon contacted nUranus”….. ?? I think the “getting over” phase can be wildly different in response to the many different reasons that a split happens. It depends first on whether you are the leaver or the leavee. And sometimes these people still remain in your thoughts after you’ve been separated for years. Sometimes I still wonder how a man I had a falling out with 25 years ago is doing….. because I loved him and I had a hard time letting go. I let him go, but I still muse sometimes about what life would have been like if we'd remained together.....

posted December 17, 2006 09:03 PM              

unfortunately my experience with relationships is pretty limited but upto now, its happened 3 times. I do usually have a hard time letting go, but once i realize tht the other person doesn't care, my *romantic* feelings go away quite swiftly. (and yeah all 3 times i was the leavee...kinda ).

And this time it almost surprised me. The other 2 times, it was more like a cappy thing, its like i picked myself up, gave my head a toss, and decided they weren't 'worth it'. This time, i surprised even myself! But you r right. it does depend on the level of attachment, and the way the relnship ends.

posted December 17, 2006 09:09 PM              

i dont want to use the word soulmate bcoz i dont know if they exist, but i think deep down inside i AM looking for something like tht. For me, as soon as i realize tht they r NOT my true love/soulmate/mr right/whtever, i get over them pretty quickly.

ILWL

posted December 17, 2006 09:48 PM            

tMoon to nUranus, ehhh.....

No, I don't think you're "naive" to believe in "true love". And you're right on the money -- True Love doesn't seek perfection, it seeks that soul-to-soul connection. And even amidst all the sadness and pain and loneliness on this planet, it happens every day

Tomorrow could be the day we meet someone..... and in the delightful process of mutual discovery we find that their presence overwhelms us, and our presence overwhelms them..... oh yes, True Love is out there.....

posted December 17, 2006 09:48 PM            

Like you Inlove, in the past, if I realized that somebody wasn't the person I thought they were then *poof* my feelings for them immediately stop. And also, its the same thing if I realize they weren't the person for me...it has been easy to get over them. I blame that on my gemini venus

I recall a time back in high school when I was obsessed/infatuated with a Hot mystery Portuguese guy that had shown up at one of the dances. I'd went to all my school dances for the rest of that year just to find him (I know, its pretty dumb). When I realized at the last dance that the Portugue was never coming back...I forgot about him like an hour later.

Sometimes if I hold on its probably because things run deeper. (Cancer sun/virgo moon in the 8th) But I usually pretend that I'm doing fine without them.

But still, if they proved to be a real wolf in sheepskins then forget about it...even if I supposedly cared for them.

posted December 18, 2006 07:22 AM            

I have to have some sort of contact with all my ex's that I really loved. I usually get persistent until we establish a communication pattern that I can rely on. I just can't stand to let people go fully and I tend to get jealous even years after it ended! It's like I have my own little pasture and I have to keep tabs on everyone, not let them wander too far off...

posted December 18, 2006 08:37 AM              

The Scorpio was first. It was great and he was gorgeous but the relationship started to lose it’s spark, and then I fell for an aqua.

The Aquarian was amazing, and lasted the longest. But I realised, to me, it was only physical, but to him much more. It got complex and I felt guilty so I moved on we’re still good friends tho

The Arian was SO cute, but it was just a fast trill. After a year, he seemed kind of morbid. Seriously put me off!!!

I left the Arian for a Cap - actually they over lapped but shhhhh - the Cap was amazing, very similar to the Aqua. Just so much fun, I adored him. But as usual the thrill had gone. So I moved on. Didn’t even last a year.

Just goes to show a relationship can’t last with sex alone. Cause I’ve tried.
Guess I have to look for something deeper.

What was the question?

posted December 18, 2006 03:50 PM              

Moon in Taurus and all that Scorpio....its really hard...all of my break ups I have grieved about for a long time...

It has been agony...

I am not great at letting go of the men in my life...

Am applauding you women that can. when you realise its time to move on....you do....

posted December 18, 2006 04:26 PM              

I don't think you can "get over" someone when you love deeply. The pain may subside - like pushed under a carpet... but it will all come back the next time you see them.

posted December 18, 2006 06:24 PM            

------------------
Sun in Libra
Moon in Cancer
Jupiter in Cancer
Venus in Virgo
Mars in Cancer
Ascendant in Cancer

posted December 18, 2006 07:34 PM            

But the last relationship wore me out, to the point where I was actually considering breaking up with him when he did it first. That one I got over after about an hour post-dumping. I think that was a relationship I was done with by the time of breakup- I wasn't brutally surprised the way I was with the other ones.

posted December 19, 2006 11:26 AM            

just like ILWL said... after years of coming-and-going, one day it hit me - that he didn't ‘really’ love me, and poof! I just stopped caring. And everything stopped right then and there. His tricks didn’t work anymore. He stopped being the One, and turned back into Nobody. I moved on and never looked back.

My Scorpio Moon is conj Uranus. I do that – accept anything - as part of the relationship, IF I can rely on real & strong feelings that back it up. No feelings = no relationship -> no sacrifice is justified.

posted December 19, 2006 11:30 AM              

Oh Wow.....

posted December 19, 2006 11:52 AM              

However, if I am given 100% certainty that the person doesn't like me I will quickly pack up my sagittarian heart and move on.

It's when there's even a slight possibility that the person is (still) interested in me that I can't let go. My Venus in Scorp pursues the object of my love with a constance like no other.