posted January 16, 2007 11:27 AM            

Has anyone tried the method Linda introduced in Love Signs? Does it work?

I guess most of us know the "basics", but what are the "fundamentals" of the safe sex rules- both to prevent sexually transmitted disease/venereal disease and unplanned pregnancy?

Anybody experienced or knowledgeable about the practice of safe sex?

posted January 16, 2007 09:26 PM            

PS I've never known a man to wait while you find/put on your dental dam (I'm not even sure what that is??) and a condom. seems pointless when the old hand jive will probably do the trick.

I'm sorry, I keep picturing the girl on "sixteen candles" (Joan Cusack) with the brace headgear.

posted January 16, 2007 09:31 PM              

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The FDA no longer allows new products using Nonoxynol-9 to make it onto the market. Condom manufacturers like Durex have completely stopped making and selling condoms lubricated with spermicide. The Coalition for Positive Sexuality recommends not using spermicide because the risks outweigh the benefits. There are plenty of safer ways to try and prevent pregnancy.

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Does spermicide make it easier to get HIV?

Very recently, the World Health Organization ran a study to see the actual relationship between using spermicide regularly and getting infected with STDs. The final results showed that frequent use of spermicide actually irritated the walls of the vagina so much that the women who used it were more likely to get infected with anything that could be spread through blood, like HIV.

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Does spermicide kill HIV?

In the 1980's, laboratory tests showed that Nonoxynol-9 did kill the HIV virus, but that is NOT true in actual use. In the study, they were using large quantities of Nonoxynol-9... too large to safely use on human beings.

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so its not so good for stoping VD,HIV and you still have a 20-60% chance you will get pregnant.

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A similar study published in the Journal of the American Medical Association found that N-9, when used with condoms, did not protect women from the bacteria that causes gonorrhea and chlamydial infection any better than condoms used alone

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posted January 16, 2007 09:40 PM            

Thanks for the thourough post, Natasha, and

Thanks for the links, Salisa, which I'm going to have a closer look in a couple of hours at the library, when I've finished another errand.

I still have some questions- for safer oral sex, should I prepare "oral sex condoms", which I've never used before, but which I presume are some of those fruit flavored ones? Would it be much safer if I used fruit flavored condoms? Are they widely accepted for people who want to have oral sex, or the other way around?

As for lubricant- would K-Y jelly be sufficiant? It's one of those things that is essential, isn't it? I think I'm going to get a tube of that myself ASAP- because I left mine at my parents' apartment, and you know, I don't live with them any more and have no intentions whatsoever of returning there, so I'll have to buy a new tube of K-Y.

I've heard that condoms are usually too fragile for anal sex, and they may break much more easily when having anal sex. I've used a regular condom for that purpose once, but I'm still concerned about the probability of a broken condom during anal sex, and I'd like to know if there are more secure alternatives.

Can a woman (and I am a woman) use a diaphragm and a male condom at the same time? Or that would be unnecessary? Would the combined use of both of them result in "safer" sex- when it comes to preventing unplanned pregnancy, in particular?

My body is of the very sensitive type, and I am prone to allergies and infections. I would also like to know the ways to prevent those. I read an article about a year ago that many college students contracted meningitis through deep kissing/French kissing. I used to do that not so infrequently, was never aware of the risks, but I think I need to know if that's indeed "risky".

Also just how to protect my reproductive organs'/my genitalia's health while having an active sex life.

Or, the links containing the information I need- that would be helpful, too.

posted January 16, 2007 09:55 PM            

And thanks a lot, Lalalinda,

Apparently both of you posted while I was typing my reply. I only viewed your messages after having sent mine. I had never heard of the theory of spermicide being able to kill HIV. But I didn't really question that, either. I think I should be much more prudent and alert when it comes to sex advice.

Usually, I would purchase the "super thin" type of condom. I have tried none of the other types, as far as I can remember. Of course the physical comfort plays a major role for pleasurable sex, but would other types of condoms bring relatively more safety- like thicker ones?

Well, forgive my tendency to ask too many detail-oriented questions and to think too much while not seeing the big picture. In simply terms, I'd just like to know what types of condoms do you think are more useful than the others...at least now I know clearly that I should stay away from any spermicide-enhanced condoms or products- I could have easily missed that, but it only takes common sense to figure out that any chemical, or artificial substance added to a condom may in fact damage the user's sexual organs.

Should I just go to Durex's website?

posted January 16, 2007 10:00 PM            

In terms of virus/STD protection, only a sheath type, where no bodily fluid is touching the genitals or near the genitals of the partner, will protect againt STDs. That includes bodily contact.. ie; mouth as well. or hands that will be in contact with mucous membranes/orifaces.

*says the pregnant lady*lol

posted January 16, 2007 11:29 PM              

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Condoms are best we have
My sympathies go to the gay man recently diagnosed with HIV despite maintaining safer sex (Is Condom Advice Flawed?, Letters, PN 122, May). I understand his confidence in condoms has been shaken, but sadly, it sounds like he was just unlucky. Since 2002, GMFA and many other HIV agencies have advised that any kite-marked condom is appropriate for anal sex based on the best research we know of. For many years gay men in the UK were told they could only use extra thick condoms, although there was no evidence to support this. It was assumed anal sex meant more friction so extra strong condoms must be safer. City University’s 2001 Condom Thickness evaluation was the first major study to test this theory. It showed no significant difference in failure rates between regular and extra thick condom types when used by gay
couples. Regular condoms are easier to find than extra thick ones and come in a much wider variety of shapes and sizes, making it easier to find a comfortable fit.
Many men report regular condoms as more sensitive, and so are more inclined to use them. No condom is 100 per cent reliable, although the risk of condom failure can be reduced by ensuring correct storage and usage and the right sort of lubricant (see www.metromate.org.uk). Research shows that men who consistently use
condoms suffer less condom failure, so practise really does make perfect. But, even if all precautions are taken and all procedures correctly followed, there remains a chance (and I stress that it’s a small chance) that the condom will fail. Condoms, extra thick or otherwise, aren’t perfect, but for men who have sex with
anyone who may have a different HIV status, they remain the best method of preventing transmission that we have.
Matthew Hodson, GMFA

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Extra thick & naturelle
Condoms are available in different strengths, naturelle and extra strong. It used to be the recommendation that extra thick be used for anal sex, although now the offical line is that any kitemarked condom is ok. Some may choose to use extra strong condoms for all types of intercourse, as their thickness can help men last longer before orgasm.

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If your really concerned that a regular condom might brake during anal sex then for peace of mind you should get the thick condoms, it wouldn't hurt...

If I could give one warning about condoms NEVER use oil based lubricants with condoms! EVER(it weakens the condom making very easy to break or tear)... only polyurethane condoms can be used with an oil based lubricants... you might already know this. and I know you use KY but ,just in case you run out of it and say I'll just use some mineral oil or vaseline . You'll at at least know not to.

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As little as sixty seconds' exposure of commerical latex condoms to mineral oil, a common component of hand lotions and other lubricants used during sexual intercourse, caused approximately 90% decreases in the strength of the condoms, as measured by their burst volumes in the standard ISO (International Standards Organization) Air Burst Test

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Ensure adequate lubrication during intercourse. When needed with latex condoms, use only water-based lubricants such as K-Y jelly or glycerin. Don't use oil-based lubricants such as baby oil, petroleum jelly, massage oil, body lotion, or cooking oil because they can weaken the latex. Oil-based lubricants may be used with polyurethane, however, without damaging the material.

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Most condoms are made of latex rubber, and oils can cause latex to break down, reducing the strength of the condom by up to 95% in 15 minutes.

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