posted April 16, 2007 11:14 AM              

I have been going through this weird thing with my Pisces "D". Not bad just odd. I am trying to get the way he's been communicating with me lately.

He is Pisces Sun 24 and Pisces Mercury 16. Lately whenever I see him (only every few months and I saw him last week) or when he writes me he's been really--what is the word---full of a little bravado, uncharacteristic swagger..when he tells me things it's a bit like he is bragging to me (his medical research, his cooking, his attendance at benefits...). I don't know that many Pisces men and the two that I do know I adore. One is him and one is my Dad. I guess my Dad can get that way when he's happy and I hit on his favoertie hobbies, etc...

Anyway here is my Pisces question. Is that a normal thing for them. He doesnt have any Aries. He is Cancer rising though late cancer. I wonder if once they start to trust you they feel more confident about themselves and let loose. It's kind of cute , a little sweet but sometimes it almost feels like he's competing breathlessly (with ME EVEN (grr!!!) and others--he always wants me to know that he knows this person or has done this... ) which feels awkward .....

posted April 16, 2007 01:25 PM              

When I was more immature I used to put up a big front when I felt insecure, and people thought I was pretty aloof and tough, (and I might be those things at times) but I *felt* pretty weak and vulnerable on the inside and I had such strong feelings. I have a pisces moon.

posted April 16, 2007 05:08 PM              

Anyway, I would like to think it's becuase he is beginning to feel more comfortable . The behvaior is basically new. He used to be opretty quiet alot. I just don't want him to think he has to prove something amazing to me. I am very shy usually so if I am out of my cautious shell--and doing my Sag Rising/Aries Moon Protector/Gemini Sun goofy optimistic gushing Ms. Charming thing on you, I already think there's something inherently amazing and brilliant about you... And I don't like people thinking they have to compete with me..

posted April 21, 2007 01:27 PM              

As Kamot mentioned, once we feel affinity we open up more and share more. This good thing (sharing) can ‘continue’ only if there is a relation (not mere friendship) in place. I say this because after 1 or 2 instances we feel shy as we are not yet in a relation to share everything every moment. Also such things (opening up more) can occur if I am happy.
I will share all my thoughts in an intimate relation. Which means that I will tell the other person what exactly I feel about things/stuff.. whether I am confident of something or not, I will say so (here I treat saying/stating different than bragging) … ..fears/feelings everything would get shared. If we know that we can do something, we will say so because we are very confident of doing that.

Now lets analyze the bragging thing. I don’t think bragging is Pisces’s cup of tea. I have few close Pisces friends and know some more, and have never come across such a thing. For that matter I think we try ‘very hard’ to avoid telling the good stuff, that we under-communicate things. Yes, we do feel good about things and might be happy about it on occasions, however not for bragging purposes. We run away from getting feelings of goodness after doing something good for someone. There is something negative that we associate with feeling good about doing good.

I don’t think we act in extreme due to insecurity or lack of quality. We may not reverse the insecurity into bragging situation. What you might see combination of 2 things – happiness of some situation and insecurity of some other different situation. Saying ‘I am good, I can do it’ would be more of a confidence building measure.
Off topic - I think insecurities might be one of the methods that we use to deal with disappointments. Its like we are better prepared to deal with a situation if it happens.

To me bragging/boasting means saying some things in a negative way..negative competition…. Also the subject being spoken/bragged also matters, if its something of insignificant consequence it might be just for fun purposes (playing around .. nothing serious).
So I think he might be doing more of sharing of thoughts as compared to negative bragging. Competing with you might be unknowingly or for fun purposes. If the competition is related to a ‘topic’ (if that’s what you meant by verbal/linguistic competition), it might be that he really is trying hard to communicate what and why he thinks about something. Its like till now he thought he was right of what he thought of something and now he is getting a different perspective from someone else (Proving one’s point – generally we don’t fall into such situations, however sometimes I do try to reason my ideas).

Other thing about he trying to ‘impress’ you by saying things. I am not sure if I can provide any insight on that front. Maybe yes, maybe no.

Other thing is trying to change oneself of known limitations. Like a person not being confident, might try to take steps of building confidence by doing things. Like in our office networking is emphasized a lot and being a quiet person I may not tend to do that. However it being a job and career thing, I try to network (though its like not acting yourself). I see the good in it from career perspective and I try to change some things. (am not saying that I will be a dynamic personality by doing this, as one’s nature will be what it is to be .. its just done with some purpose in mind).

posted April 23, 2007 09:43 PM              

Villy you're very sweet to write so much. I have read it over and over again. Much of it resonates, but I am not sure what's going on with him. And I think I am having a bit of a bad day. Some days I just long for his words, and if I don't see them, read them, it's a dull ache. It's all very foolish and foolhardy. He met my little one at the last meeting and I think it was a bit startling. Seeing me in the tender mother role.

Anyway, your comment about if "it's just a friendship..."well this is just that--only that so maybe he just feels like he can't go but so deep. Meanwhile I have my heart dug in.

Bragging may not be the best word at any rate. He has been teasing me a bit. It's like the boy who used to pull my pony tails in third grade. LOL. One minute he is staring at me so hard I think a spot might burrow and flame through me and the next he is teasing. I am perenially confused.

posted April 24, 2007 09:49 PM              

I guess he is kind of flirting. I have not many instances to flirt, however once I did kind of similar thing, when I was in a gay mood (probably it was also due to me thinking that if she is flirting with me, let me also get back to her...its like thinking, 'lets play the game if thats what u want').

I am sure he would also be constant state of flux (if he has feelings for you), of what to do or not to do. I am not sure that for a Pisces how easy/hard it is to control emotions (not short term, but prolonged interaction ones).

Also hope your Aries Venus (hope I recollect correctly), like mine, is not causing the instant attractions.

I have found myself easily getting attracted at the same time easily loosing the same (with no deep feelings). However this is only for unknown females (I mean couple of meetings or none). If something like Sag incident comes into picture or where constant interaction is present, its bit difficult to get out of the feelings faster. (Not sure which trait colors what - my Aries Venus/Moon or Pisces Sun)

posted April 24, 2007 10:17 PM              

I did not, however, start feeling strongly about him until 2005--that was 8 years into knowing him and seeing him four times a year. And I was feeling very vulnerable. It was when he said he would never let anything happen to me that I sort of fell down the proverbial rabbit hole. The fact that he allowed me to cross over his boundaries when technically he should not have (emails, gifts etc)made us closer.

It is a bit of a dance as you intimate with much back and forth. But I think it only works because both of us know neither of us is going to step over this invisible line.

And unfortunately I think I confuse him. Like, I gave him really lovely thoughtful birthday gifts this year but he knows my family helped delivering them. (He wrote that I really made his day.) I have to do that to protect myself. And he is the same I think. So if he is waiting for the other (me) to do anything spectacularly overtly erotically untoward, it just may not happen until we are 75.