posted April 29, 2008 01:56 PM         

I don't have any big career goals (for the life of me I've never had a dream career or a passion to BE anything). I'm not (nor have I ever been) in a serious relationship... I'm just at a stand still.

Everyone says that I'm young and I'll figure it out, but I've been *trying* to figure it out since I was 18. I want to do something bigger and better with my life, but I just don't know what...

I'm so messed up, I don't know... I just want to give up right now.

Can anyone offer me advice, maybe it has to do with my chart or something? I don't know what to do...

posted April 29, 2008 02:30 PM         

The DK Foundation is a site I like for looking at transits and progressions, I particularly like their interpretations for houses. Check out what it says here for Neptune in the 12th:

http://www.dkfoundation.co.uk/BookTransitsBook12.htm

When Neptune transits its own House its effects are subtle unless H12 is tenanted, in which case, the energy principles indicated by those planets under Neptune’s influence, are likely to be used in ways, which have a notable effect on his life as a whole.

When Neptune is influencing his inner planets, a person is capable of acts of great self-sacrifice but he can also be come seriously deluded. This is never more true than when Neptune is working through the 12th House. The combination of other-regardingness and self-interest masquerading as other-regardingness can create situations of such confusion that a person may lose his direction. This is particularly likely if Neptune contacts the Sun, Venus or Mars.

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If you check through an ephemeris you will see that the Neptune/Venus contact is going to have an effect for a while longer so you will have to ride it out. Venus rules your 7th (close relationships) and 2nd (security, self-worth, personal finances).

Some good advice from CafeAstrology:
http://www.cafeastrology.com/neptunetransits.html

Neptune transits conjunct Venus You are more sensitive than ever to emotional stimulus at this time, as your love and pleasure nature is heightened. You are opening up your heart, which can also mean you are more vulnerable to romantic illusions. You find yourself especially idealistic, romantic, and charming. You are also very easily charmed as well, and you must watch for a tendency to see what you want to see in romantic partners. You may gloss over important details and practical concerns in favor of idealistic visions and perceptions. Your desires are tender and compassionate. You are responsive to all things pleasurable. Finances can suffer under this transit if you have a tendency to live on credit. Try not to borrow from your future, not just with regards to finances. Force yourself to consider practical matters, even though you may resist it, while opening your heart to new possibilities. And, while opening your heart to new possibilities, be sure to use some common sense.

posted April 29, 2008 09:56 PM         

What I suggest you do is think about what your interests are and see if you can turn one of your interests into a career. Neptune transits add tremendous confusion but they can also make you highly creative, so take advantage of your situation and do a bit of exploring. Take a few classes to expand on your interests.

You could also try asking your friends what they think your strengths and weaknesses are or what career they think would be best for you. You don't necessarily have to jump into whatever career they choose for you, but it will help you generate some ideas of your own.

posted April 30, 2008 10:26 AM         

There are also no planets in the 1st house which is the house that usually gives vitality to whatever planet that resides within it (unless afflicted)... so motivation might require more energy for you than say someone with Mars in the 1st house.

It probably doesn't please you to be driven, and so if you want a purpose, look to what you love to do, rather than what will give you a bright career- and through this, a bright career might follow. Use your desires, things you enjoy, to make your livelihood, and this is where you will be fulfilled; and forget about society's idea of what success should be.

You are not the cut-throat competitive type, so don't force it. Find your niche and capitalize on that.

Venus square Jupiter might indicate someone who might not be as responsible as they should so you might find that you do not save money as you should which might find you in a place where you have nothing to show for your achievements - but this is easy... just get someone to look after your finances for you and deal with creative pursuits to get your income. Financial advisers were invented for this very reason. Because you might not be interested in the logistics of building your finances and career doesn't mean that you can't have financial freedom or a career. This means that you must delegate.

posted April 30, 2008 11:19 AM         

The whole career issue is on your mind right now because transiting Pluto is crossing your Midheaven for the 2nd time out of 3. Pluto is currently retrograde which means that it appears to be traveling backwards. The Midheaven is the career point in a chart.

You have Neptune hugging your Midheaven from the 9th house. Neptune can suggest confusion among many other things, but right now it appears that it is causing you confusion or just a great lack of clarity about your career. Usually when I see Neptune so close to someone's Midheaven I think of a career in the arts, some type of spiritual or religious pursuits, chemistry, psychology, even dreams. I find it interesting that you said that you never had a dream career and you have Neptune so close to your career point.

Your Neptune rules your 12th house of secrets so a part of me wonders if you do have a dream career but you won't admit it to anyone, including yourself. And just to throw out a wild card, there may be something hidden or secret about yourself that you don't want to show the world and in some respect, your life is a sham or a charade.

I know many people who are interested in the arts whether it is theatre, music, dance, creative writing, whatever, they don't acknowledge art as a career option perhaps because of their upbringing. The family is so strict that the arts are a waste of time and money, that it's not a consideration. Well, you chart suggests that this might be a real consideration for you.

If you're feeling like you're in career limbo right now, you won't feel that way for much longer. As Pluto transits across your Midheaven the next two times, it feels like you are going to do something about career. You may try things or investigate things you never considered before. You just may decide to take actions that you've been neglecting somehow. Pluto will retrograde back to your natal Neptune. You may feel even more confused than you are right now because Pluto magnifies what it touches. It also destroys for renewal, so it may be turning your Neptune inside out forcing it to come up with answers or just expanding the oil spill of confusion. But you've got so many choices, perhaps you may want to consider exploring them.

Also, Neptune rules your 12th house health center so take good care of yourself, preferably in a holistic way since Neptune rules holistic remedies. Also, stay away from drugs and alcohol. Transiting Pluto to natal Neptune is what happened to Britney Spears and her drug issues, it happens to many people or they go through a spiritual transformation. I really believe that you won't be confused for much longer. Just you asking these questions is the beginning.

As for your love life, I wonder if you have been in a serious relationship but you just didn't know it. Venus in Aquarius can love in a detached manner or they are so busy loving the whole human race that they don't connect strongly to one individual, but I believe there are many other people on this forum who can tell you their experiences as a person with Venus in Aquarius.

That's all I can do now, I wish you luck and urge you to admit to yourself first what your dreams really are, I think you do know what you want to do, you just have to say what it is, no matter how wild it seems. Once you admit it, perhaps you can begin a reshaping of it or just jump into the mud of life. Giving up is not an option.

Geocosmic Valentine
Professional Astrologer
geocosmicvalentine@yahoo.com
. www.myspace.com/geocosmicvalentine

posted April 30, 2008 12:53 PM         

Weird that you mentioned financial problems, because right now all my credit cards are maxed out, and I'm living paycheck to paycheck. It's rediculous. I def need to get that in order.

As for a "secret" career. I guess I've always dreamed of having a family, and being a mom. I hate to be a traitor to my generation... and I know that's cheesy, so 1950s of me, but I want the house, a bunch of kids, a dog and a white picket fence.

But on the other hand, I feel like I'm "too smart" or like I'd just be wasting my brain... plus, I'm not lazy, so I do want to work, the "soccer mom"/"ladies who lunch" lifestyle would drive me crazy... I dunno...

Plus, sadly, I'm beginning to think it will never happen for me, because I'm so incredibly messed up when it comes to men and relationships... I don't ever see myself opening up and trusting a man, or letting my guard down in order to have a serious, committed, long term, marriage & family...

I'll hone in on my interests, and ask family/friends...maybe look into artsy careers.

Thanks for all your help, I truly appreciate it!

posted April 30, 2008 04:20 PM         

There is the potential for a home based career from what I remember about your chart. Your chart keeps disappearing for some reason. But I want to bring to your attention that you put yourself between a rock and a hard place. How? Well, you will not be a house wife and mother next year or even six months from now if you already have it in your mind that you don't have good relationships.

So, start again. The ultimate goal is to be a stay at home mother and house-wife. But you need a plan A, B, and C for a career or a job to begin very soon unless you want to stay where you are living paycheck to paycheck.

When you went to college, what was your major?

How can you take concrete steps to heal your relationship issues?

Things like that. Part of being a house wife is having business skills, creative skills, organization skills, administrative skills. Being a successful home maker takes business know how as well.

I have a chart that is oriented toward a stay at home business as well and it's just started to happen at the ripe old age of 40. A stay at home career is only one of a thousand options for you. I'm just trying to help you put your feet on the ground in your thinking process, so I'm just suggesting that you choose another focus until you are married with children.

Geocosmic Valentine

posted April 30, 2008 04:51 PM         

quote:

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Part of being a house wife is having business skills, creative skills, organization skills, administrative skills. Being a successful home maker takes business know how as well

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posted April 30, 2008 05:35 PM         

How can you take concrete steps to heal your relationship issues?
>>>>

I was an International Politics major... Economics & History minors. I most enjoyed Economic Development (particularly how to help jumpstart the economies of 3rd world counties)... but I have no interest in working for corporate america, or even the government...both I sort of see as "corrupt" (the government being the lesser of the 2 evils)....

As for relationship issues, stems from my mother a "functional alcoholic" - in she was never ever abusive and it's a family secret, no one ever speaks of.... I don't think I've ever said the words "My mother is an alcoholic" out loud. Ever.

She is the quintessential mom... very supportive, loving, caring, 4 children, cooked dinner every night, all my friends adore her, raised all her grandchildren, but still, it's sort of made me feel like my life is a "charade" to some extent, basically, I feel like no one knows the real me, because they don't know this secret...it's a hard burden to carry around, but at the same time, it's nearly impossible to think about revealing it.

I've looked up meetings for Al-Anon, and I've tried going to a psychologist, but it's just too much... I feel like it would be like opening floodgates if I touched on the issue, not to mention an extrodinary betrayal of my mother. No matter what her addiction, she was above & beyond a great mother and still is an amazing friend to me... I just don't know how to confront or deal with it....

posted April 30, 2008 06:01 PM         

Hi Geocosmic Valentine.

I have a father who is a functional alcoholic. I love him very much and he was a great provider, but "his" alcoholism got in the way of "my" life development as well and everyone has a right to develope into the best person they can be.

Your mother was a great mother because she was supposed to be. You had the right to have a great mother and you don't owe her anything in return or any sacrifices in return.

You really don't.

If you feel that you must be a martyr to her somehow, then let me introduce you to "CODA" which is Codepence Anonymous.

It's a real disease and a real program and Neptune sitting right next to your Midheaven, which is one side of your "Parental Axis" tells the whole story of one of your parents being a substance abuser or an addict of some kind. Neptune also rules "Codependence" and is related to Pisces which is the sign of the Martyr.

Ain't astrology wonderful?!

Alcoholics and addicts are not automatically bad people. But their addictions and actions caused by them can affect you greatly in negative ways. I bet you never imagined you'd be 25 without a real relationship or a career and somehow the subject of your alcoholic Mom enters into the conversation. I highly support you in exploring some avenues of recovery, you won't be sorry and you'll meet people who have the exact same story and experiences as you and they can help you to move through it and into the life that you deserve, without feeling like you're not supposed to love your mother because of it.

If you don't feel like speaking at a meeting just go an sit and listen and one day you might feel comfortable speaking for yourself. The "Anon" part of Alanon means that you remain anonymous, so there's no betrayal.

And what you just admitted is that "her" alcoholism is keeping you from moving on with the normal course of your life and love and a career that fulfills you. And feeling like no one really knows you because of her...that's no way for "YOU" to live.

posted May 02, 2008 10:27 AM         

I've looked at that website a hundred times, and promise myself that "one day" I'll go... but something always holds me back...

There's a part of me that doesn't want to admit things...and that doesn't think it's "bad enough" to be upset about...

But I really do appreciate your advice...