posted August 08, 2008 12:13 PM         

but now that i've had around 5 months to regain some of my self back, i just can't help but feel that what if i fail the year again? it's my last chance at having free education, and most importantly proving to people that i'm not as hopeless as i've been and seen as. but i'm scared that maybe my problems haven't fully risen out of me, and that i'm still depressed, and i won't cope with education again.

and also with the fact that my friends are moving onto university, while i'm still in my first year of college, just dampens it all a little bit, and i'll miss them. but i feel that extra more "go get it" feeling inside me, which i haven't felt in years.

i just wanted some advice on what i could do to stop feeling scared and not failing again. i feel nervous about the new college i'm going to, the new people i'll meet, the new friends i'll have to make, and i REALLY just want to be more confident with myself and be focused on what truly counts, my education, and not on what other people think of me, like a dumb dropout, or a hopeless being in life. because i know deep inside that it's not me, and that i want to be something in my life.

my birth chart details are:

26th September 1989
Blackburn, UK
7:12pm

posted August 08, 2008 04:36 PM         

And if you do fail, well go and do something else. It's not like not having A-levels sentences you to a lifetime of poverty and misery. But don't worry about that either, presume that 3rd time is a charm and just do your best.

posted August 09, 2008 07:21 AM         

Here are two truths I have discovered with the knowledge of advancing years.
No one and I repeat NO ONE at your age feels in control and confident.
Those who appear to be, just have a very good facade which trust me breaks down very quickly under careful scrutiny.
All of us at that age are struggling like hell just to stay afloat so do not worry about the people at college.
They are in the same boat as you...end of story.

You cannot percieve how far you have to go. If you were shown your life now in fast forward you would freak!!
In a million years you won't have the faintest idea what life will throw your way.
So armed with that knowledge it is POINTLESS worrying.

Break your life down into simple month by month chunks and do not look any further ahead.
Set yourself five small goals a month (the smaller the better) and set out to achieve them. Simple things like studying for twenty minutes a night (maximum amount the brain can absorb ine one hit!)
Write them down and as you achieve them and tick them off.
I won't go into the psychological effects of this on your subconscious but it works. That's all you need to worry about!

Truth number 2 and this is hard to believe.
You are not missing anything.
We always think everyone is having a better time/ doing more/ getting more/ miles ahead of us.
No they are not.
You just focus on yourself baby girl and don't give a flying fig what anyone else is up to.
You sound bright, articulate and (you gotta believe me kaira) aeons ahead of where I was at your age and I have done ok!!