Author
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Topic: Another One Bites the Dust
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Unmoved Knowflake Posts: 2160 From: Born in S.Africa Registered: Jun 2007
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posted October 22, 2008 10:02 AM
Another friendship's about to die. My Sun and Venus in 11th can't bear it. I had a "crush" on this guy when I was 13 or something ridiculous like that. We didn't know each other until recently. Now we talk... He's married, has a kid, he's got a nice career. We are a boring pair who touch base once in a while. We were playing a game online when the tone went a bit 8th house for my preference. I started it, I think, but he's so Saturn. It seemed like he would associate "breasts" with chicken because unlike me, he doesn't get bombarded by sexual undertones or bathroom humour when hearing the words "pee-can-nut-pie". So, I stopped our game. I wasn't appalled or judgmental. He's married and our "connection" was at a nice level. I'm a party-pooper I know. I would do it again too but, it's not fun. Sigh. The bottom line is: I think I over reacted but I couldn't risk the the alternative. I can't say if he was treating me cheaply, or if he read the wrong que from me or whether it was spontaneous. . I'll will post some placements relative to each other's charts in the next post. Please be patient because I'm not posting a chart or giving in birth data. I'll type out everything though, hence my request for your patience. Thank you. I chastised him. He said I ended the game as he was getting into it. I felt stupid afterwards. Then I got angry. Then I felt embarrassed and guilty. I felt bad. I can't remember details but he apologised and saying that he enjoyed talking to me. All I remember is that he said "Please". and I was touched. We went quiet, or I didn't respond to him. I changed our routine by going quiet and he soon followed suit. Then he randomly mailed me three letters (alphabets) "BOO". I replied with (???) and I left it at that. Nature would make me shrug it off, do like Johny Walker and keep walking... IP: Logged |
wheelsofcheese Knowflake Posts: 1472 From: UK Registered: Jan 2008
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posted October 22, 2008 10:07 AM
I had this happen with a Scorpio and I had to tell him off. He and I were with other people and were friends for a long time. It came out of the blue. Is he a Scorpio? IP: Logged |
PeaceAngel Knowflake Posts: 6678 From: Australia Registered: May 2008
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posted October 22, 2008 10:15 AM
UnmovedHow would you have felt if it were a female friend making similar type comments? That would be my measure as to intentions. I think it's hard for men and women to be just friends without one being curious at least at some stage. But friendship is just friendship, despite sex or any other detail. IP: Logged |
sunshine_lion Knowflake Posts: 919 From: ann arbor mi Registered: Apr 2008
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posted October 22, 2008 10:23 AM
I think you did a healthy thing. Set perimiters. He will be staying inside the lines now I'll betcha. All of us like to test the waters...and you are a very attractive woman. you will be back playing your game with your friend in no time.IP: Logged |
sunshine_lion Knowflake Posts: 919 From: ann arbor mi Registered: Apr 2008
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posted October 22, 2008 10:27 AM
after all he does have testosterone. sometimes the word breast is all it takes. They never outgrow it. Kinda like fart jokes. a 45 year old man will still laugh at fart jokes, stare at your breasts instead of your eyes, not hear a word you are saying.... and still think it is all pretty funny. it is really not his fault. I think he will (try to) behave now.IP: Logged |
lalalinda Moderator Posts: 3823 From: nevada Registered: Jun 2005
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posted October 22, 2008 10:28 AM
we are talking about crossing lines through sexual inuendo right?Why is it that women worry or feel bad when we say stop? we're not wrong here. there should be no guilt (about hurting their feelings) I definately hear you on the "not fun" part. and No you didn't over react. IP: Logged |
PeaceAngel Knowflake Posts: 6678 From: Australia Registered: May 2008
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posted October 22, 2008 10:33 AM
quote: after all he does have testosterone. sometimes the word breast is all it takes. They never outgrow it. Kinda like fart jokes. a 45 year old man will still laugh at fart jokes, stare at your breasts instead of your eyes, not hear a word you are saying.... and still think it is all pretty funny. it is really not his fault. I think he will (try to) behave now.
LOL - fart jokes ARE funny! The not hearing thing is inherent in all men - i'm convinced - they all suffer from selective hearing. I think after a while it's like the Peanuts cartoon - we talk and all they hear is "wah, wah, wah". Not all men stare at your breasts instead of your eyes. However, a good remedy for that is to stare at their crotch. It unsettles them somewhat. Tis very very true - and highly effective. Not to mention hilarious. IP: Logged |
Unmoved Knowflake Posts: 2160 From: Born in S.Africa Registered: Jun 2007
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posted October 22, 2008 10:52 AM
My data: 13.09.1982, 08:10am, Durban, South Africa.Him- 9o Cap Sun in 4th rules 12th 22o Sag Moo in 3rd rules 11th 26o Cap Mer in 4th rules 1st+10th 28o Sco Ven in 3rd rules 2nd+ 9th 17o Gem Mar in 9th rules 8th 15o Ari Jup in 7th rules 4th 1o Leo Sat in 11th rules 5th 6o Sco Ura in 2nd rules 6th 12o Sag Nep in 3rd rules 7th 11o Lib Plu in 1st rules 3rd 20o Scorp NN in 2nd 23o Aries Chiron in 8th 24o Virgo MC 24o Gem AC Sorry about all of this. I didn't ask for permission to share his chart. IP: Logged |
Unmoved Knowflake Posts: 2160 From: Born in S.Africa Registered: Jun 2007
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posted October 22, 2008 10:55 AM
Oh. I just read your comments. Those who said that I shouldn't feel bad are right. I shouldn't. I wonder how he managed that? I'm sensitive and all but guilt is not common. Let me post the house overlays. Before I reply properly. IP: Logged |
Lara Knowflake Posts: 3274 From: London Registered: Mar 2006
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posted October 22, 2008 11:04 AM
Im sorry unmoved. That's rough. IP: Logged |
Unmoved Knowflake Posts: 2160 From: Born in S.Africa Registered: Jun 2007
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posted October 22, 2008 11:32 AM
SUN His: in my 3rd Mine: in his 12thMOON His: in my 2nd Mine: in his 10th MERCURY His: in my 4th Mine: in his 1st VENUS His: in my 1st Mine: in his 12th MARS His: in my 8th Mine: in his 3rd JUPITER His: in my 6th Mine: in his 2nd AC His: in my 12th Mine: in his 2nd DC His: in my 6th Mine: in his 8th I did personal planets on this post. No asteroids. That's why I thought that house overlays and rulers would probably show something. I'm quite concerned about how we activated the other's 12th house. What makes it suck is because it personal planets and major angles in there. Now, I'm not good at this at all. That's why I wanted to ask what you guys see. IP: Logged |
Unmoved Knowflake Posts: 2160 From: Born in S.Africa Registered: Jun 2007
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posted October 22, 2008 12:56 PM
deux- He has Venus in Scorpio. Don't get me wrong. I don't think he's a creep. I'm just sad. I'm a friend hoarding type. If we never recover, that's one less contact I have. This means a friend fix-up door closes. What I did was not horrible. He knows. I know that he's a good guy. I think there's still something if the whole think is still charged. It's like being watched. That's the feeling I want to get rid of. He identifies a lot with his ego. PA- If one of my girl friends did that, I'd think it's a prank. I have 2 female gay friends. They are attracted to women but they aren't opportunistic when it comes to intimacy. Yeah. I can't and don't want to take anything back. sunshine_lion- Thank you. I wish I didn't have to set boundaries but I had to. What could I have done? What frustrates me is that there were other ways of being a flirt without crossing a line. He could have gone 5th house if 3rd was too much BUT noooo. He went 8TH?! lol. I was just idealistic and naive. And, I'm sure he can have any woman he wants. Being married doesn't decrease your chances these days. PA. Crotch. Lol. I remember when that word was just a word, until Lindsay Lohan was called a fire-crotch by her ex billionaire boyfriend. She's a redhead.
Lara- it totally sucks. I just hope the whole thing blows over. I think it means more to me because it's part of a pattern. If setting boundaries wasn't a theme in my life, it would've been better. IP: Logged |
Unmoved Knowflake Posts: 2160 From: Born in S.Africa Registered: Jun 2007
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posted October 22, 2008 01:21 PM
Does anyone know how to interpret personal planets in the 12 house? The 12th house is becoming fascinating to me. e.g. My sun is in his 12th and his Asc is my 12th. Does this mean that him and I are secretive or does it mean I'm a secret? Of course, it could have nothing to do with secrets. I hope we aren't in the process of becoming secret enemies. I have plenty alreay. 12th House is filled with losses and deception is a prominent theme too. The only way the 12 house works for you is if you're into the occult. I kind of like the Vedic definitions. They don't beat about the bush. e.g. 12th HOUSE is the house of: misery and misfortune sorrow and sin disgrace and insults involvement in Scandals. restraint and limitation and It's the house of the left ear, left eye and feet. IP: Logged |