Posts: 628
From: norfolk, virginia USA
Registered: May 2006

posted December 19, 2008 08:35 AM         

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There have been some posts about SATURN-so I have a synastry question about SATURN.
I have seen posts on this subject, but has never been answered to my satisfaction.

VENUS SQUARE SATURN-IF you are the SATURN, how do you really feel about VENUS. Are you aware that you make VENUS feel like poop sometimes? Do you enjoy this type of thing?

Just curious. Why is Saturn such a wet blanket and what do you fear if anything.
Or do you just feel cold towards venus.

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Posts: 1015
From: New York, NY
Registered: Sep 2007

posted December 19, 2008 09:15 AM         

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I was the Saturn conjunct his Venus.

The way it worked out is I had a constant urge to control his social behavior. He could really be too eccentric in public situations, say the wrong thing-embarrassing things-in public.

Another guy I was with had Venus opposite my Saturn. The sex ended rather quickly, after about 4 months, but the relationship lasted 3 years, but the sex life never quite recovered. I think I may have been controlling with him as well. I didn't enjoy being the control person and it's not how people would describe me, it's just that both of these guys did have strange social upbringings.

A good question is "Why do I attract extreme social misfits that I feel I have to re-socialize?"

Great topic.

Geocosmic Valentine
Professional Astrologer
geocosmicvalentine@yahoo.com
. www.myspace.com/geocosmicvalentine

------------------
"Everybody is a star!"
Sly & The Family Stone

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Posts: 628
From: norfolk, virginia USA
Registered: May 2006

posted December 19, 2008 09:50 AM         

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Geo:

Why did the sex stop? Did u stop it?
Or vice versa?

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Posts: 13
From: england
Registered: Dec 2008

posted December 19, 2008 10:36 AM         

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well we all have saturn somewhere!! saturn takes responsibility so in synastry it can show one person having to parent the other yet without saturn there is no glue in the relationship,saturn is serious not miserable and venus can be lazy so I imagine when saturn gets miserable at venus it's because venus isn't pulling it's weight or being serious when she needs to be,saturn probably doesn't like making venus feel like poo but saturn was probably feeling like poo before he redirected it at venus.

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Posts: 92
From:
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posted December 19, 2008 10:47 AM         

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I don't feel that Saturn has anything to *teach* you in synastry, at least not with the hard aspects. From my experience, all Saturn does is control, suck the life out of you, and turn you into a robot. Doesn't sound like a lesson I need.
But Saturn in one's natal chart isn't bad. I find that many people who are Saturn-ruled work hard, have determination, and are able to control *themselves*. Controlling others, though, is a problem.

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Posts: 119
From: Denver, CO, USA
Registered: Jun 2008

posted December 19, 2008 10:55 AM         

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saturn takes responsibility so in synastry it can show one person having to parent...saturn is serious not miserable and venus can be lazy so I imagine when saturn gets miserable at venus it's because venus isn't pulling it's weight or being serious when she needs to be...

I have to give my whole-hearted agreement with Afflicted Venus' summary of Saturn and Venus in synastry. I'm the Saturn person with my fiancee's Virgo Venus and Mars. I feel like the parent in this relationship because she can be very lazy and lacks direction or personal responsibility a lot of the time.

It's tough being the "parent" of someone who was raised by a Neptunian and who is also very Neptunian herself.It really doesn't help that I'm in ultra-Saturn mode right now because of my Saturn Return and that I'm becoming grounded in reality while dealing with those famous Neptune rose-colored glasses.

I like Geocosmic's question about attracting social misfits, but I'd modify it a bit: "Why do I have to attract Neptunians all the time?" Answer: My Pisces South Node in the 5th house.

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Posts: 628
From: norfolk, virginia USA
Registered: May 2006

posted December 19, 2008 10:56 AM         

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Fist of Legend:

I like your insight! I am no stranger to saturn. I am disciplined, pull my weight so to speak.

Saturn controls WHEN WHERE HOW AND WHY.
After a while, its like "ok now-why are u making me feel like poo?"

Do they LOVE venus at all? Or do they just like to control and not really love you?

PLUTO: I am also very neptunian. Maybe this shows to others. I like fantasy, fantasy art, etc. My sun square neptune, etc.

BUT i have saturn square to the ascendant.
I am not stranger to work and discipline.
Very funny-his north node also in Pisces.
ha ha. may be on to something here.

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Posts: 13
From: england
Registered: Dec 2008

posted December 19, 2008 11:36 AM         

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lovegoblin,we love with moon,venus,sun,etc you can't blame saturn for being saturn,rather like having a go at a magpie for being black and white,saturn will take responsibility for venus,it will feel obligated without these things it wouldn't last,there have to be other reasons behind the feeling like poo,saturn deals with reality,what's the nature of the bickering or arguments? sounds like mercury is playing its part in this. btw plutonian I've a scorp asc,venus in virgo con pluto and my other half has sun,merc,venus,north node conj neptune,and jup in pisces,my moon aries,his cancer we have a total role reversal half the time.I'm daddy he's mummy

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Posts: 314
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posted December 19, 2008 11:40 AM         

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I have venus square saturn natally.
I get used to this energy but as a matter of fact I don't like it in a relationship.
I was the saturn person twice and venus person for three times..

As a saturn person in these relationships,
I couldn't trust those people easily even though I loved them both too much..There were some control issues either..
They both were very attracted to me but couldn't show it the way I wanted.

both relationships are over,but one still want me back,I don't want him anymore..

The most important thing was,well I dont wanna brag or something but,They both learned many things from me.

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Posts: 119
From: Denver, CO, USA
Registered: Jun 2008

posted December 19, 2008 12:46 PM         

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Love Goblin:
PLUTO: I am also very neptunian. Maybe this shows to others. I like fantasy, fantasy art, etc. My sun square neptune, etc. BUT i have saturn square to the ascendant.I am not stranger to work and discipline.Very funny-his north node also in Pisces.ha ha. may be on to something here

My fiancee has her Scorpio Sun and Pluto conjunct Saturn so you'd think that this would be a grounding influence, but nope the Sag Neptune aspects (Moon conjunct, Venus/Mars square, ASC trine) take over. As for the node, all I can say is "I try to leave, but it just keeps pulling me back in!"

afflicted:
btw plutonian I've a scorp asc,venus in virgo con pluto and my other half has sun,merc,venus,north node conj neptune,and jup in pisces,my moon aries,his cancer we have a total role reversal half the time.I'm daddy he's mummy

I know how you feel, my Moon and Venus are conjunct my fiancee's Sun, so I'm mom and she's dad most of the time, but then my Saturn strikes and suddenly I'm dad and she's mom.

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Posts: 13
From: england
Registered: Dec 2008

posted December 19, 2008 01:32 PM         

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if we look at what saturn represents which is restriction,limits etc then it's hardly suprising any contacts to venus ( which is how you receive love)are gonna be hard,however I do believe that ALL human love has it's limitations and neptunians above anyone else will have problems because neptunian love is about bliss,no boundaries etc and it looks like many posting here also have neptune thrown in with this saturn venus stuff,I have a very wide square to my partner's venus,his saturn quintiles my venus,my venus and saturn are natally square(hence being called afflicted) yet venus is not the bee all and end all of love,we also have ven con nept in the synastry and that does help! we all need healthy boundaries, life has it's limitations whether we like it or not,I think we all have something to learn from saturn in synastry,but the fact is without it life would be chaotic and very unstable.

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Posts: 87
From: U.S.
Registered: Nov 2007

posted December 19, 2008 01:34 PM         

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I always thought that Saturn was actually misunderstood. And that they lecture you and control you because they actually want what's best for you. Exactly like a parent. When you slump and wonder why they yell or punish you for something, they come back later and give you that speech explaining that it's because they only want what's best for you. And that if they don't show you what's right now, you'll find out later in life in a much more harsh way.

That's the kind of mindset that I thought a Saturnian would enter a relationship with.

If I'm completely wrong, then it's still nice to have that theory to buffer the coldness.

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Posts: 135
From: Neptune
Registered: Feb 2008

posted December 19, 2008 01:40 PM         

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Venus Square Saturn in synastry

WORK(Saturn) VERSUS PLAY(Venus)

There is a clash here cause one of you, the 'player' , will want to enjoy themselves while the other the 'worker' , is beset with duties and schedules. Or the 'worker' will try to instill discipline into how the 'player' goes about their aesthetic,social or other pursuits. So the 'worker' feels like the parent who has to forever guide their child in the ways of the world,stressing that effort,economy and objectivity is nessecary if one is to get on in life. Unfortunatly, the 'player' will to often reguard this as being to serious and emotionally supressive.Because the 'worker' is thus made to feel the killjoy or wet-blanket, or simply socially or emotionally inadequate, it falls to them to realize they are being forced to become more disciplined and responsible as well, but in the more refined sense of learning to draw the line yet at the same time not react to the 'players' complaints,games or indulgences. Like the good teacher, the 'worker' should deliver the lessons with the firm inner assurance that sooner or later the pupil will have to learn - maybe the hard way and in their own time - but without becoming embittered because they feel they are being misunderstood,like som many parents,real or metaphorical,so often do. The 'player' should tell themselves that the 'worker' will ease of their pressure in proportion to how much they learn to become responsible and constructive with reguard to their talents and moral behavior. It is important, however, that the 'worker' does not overlook the sublime and childlike charm with which the 'player' can brighten up a dull day or even prevent the 'worker' from becoming a dull and unloving person. All in all, this makes for a serious relationship where each of you is learning to strike a balance between love and duty, pleasure and resposibility. Seperation can occasionally threaten,or even become a reality, if the above "writing on the wall" is not read and obeyed. But given time, and it can go from strength to strength.

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Posts: 4721
From: The Asylum
Registered: Mar 2006

posted December 19, 2008 01:44 PM         

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quote:

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The way it worked out is I had a constant urge to control his social behavior. He could really be too eccentric in public situations, say the wrong thing-embarrassing things-in public.

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I had venus opposite saturn with my father both ways (we both have gemini venuses and saturn in sag). I did feel that he tried to do this to me ALOT in childhood, and he still tries to 'correct' my social behavior. Very repressive stuff, I wouldn't recommend it for the faint hearted.

I had venus opposite saturn with a co-worker (I was venus), and his mars was also opposite my saturn. Towards the end of the time I worked with him I can honestly say we were OKAY with eachother. However, for most of our relationship we DESPISED eachother. He thought I was always belitting him or talking down to him, and I felt as if he respected every other female co-worker's authority except mine (alot of times my position gave me authority over him). It sucked to work with him sometimes.

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Posts: 546
From: Europe
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posted December 19, 2008 04:08 PM         

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A very short answer, holding the core-experience I made with difficult Saturn-aspects in synastry (squares, conjuncts, oppositions):

When, in Synastry, it was the other person, whose Saturn had a hold on my personal planets (like: his Saturn square my Mars) - it was ME who lost the fun and attraction, sooner and later, and I fled these relationships.

When it was the other way around, my Saturn squaring his Sun and Mercury, for instance - it was the guy who seemed to have lost that loving feelin some day and pulled back.

One of these relationships was one lasting (9 years), another was rather short (almost a year).

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Posts: 628
From: norfolk, virginia USA
Registered: May 2006

posted December 19, 2008 10:39 PM         

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Thanks all of you for your input.
And for being very candid!

luvs

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