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Author Topic:   Immature Cancer Guy and Naïve Girl
unikestyle
Newflake

Posts: 13
From: Los Angeles, CA, US
Registered: Jan 2011

posted January 22, 2012 01:26 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for unikestyle     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Hello you all! First, I have to say that I'm so happy to join this community, but I also have to apologize for the very trivial question I'm about to ask (especially since it's been asked many times before). I really appreciate anyone who takes the time to read this and offer any advice/insight. Anyway, here goes:
I met a guy - let's call him M - two years younger than me when I was studying abroad in England last May (he was 18 going on 19 at the time, and I was 20), and when we first talked I instantly knew that he was curious about me. After kind of trying to hang out with me (perhaps seriously? Not sure) and eventually backing off, I started to realize that I liked him and tried to pick up where he left off. However, the majority of the time, he was acting a bit sideways and hot and cold towards me.
Anyway, we finally hung out 9th week, when he’s finished with his exams: after kind of flaking, he texted me at night asking to watch a movie, since we had never hung out. I should have known that this was your classic booty call situation, but since I really haven't done anything with a guy, I didn't know - I was very naïve. I ended up leaving his room after a bit of a makeout session (I tried to leave before, but I was curious myself and - a random side note - apparently a good kisser) and after he got a bo*er. The last thing I wanted to do was tease him, but I seriously didn't know that that was all he wanted. Anyway, I reassured him that I liked him, only that things were moving really quickly. However, he sent me a text saying "(My name), I'm sorry, after thinking about it for some time I think you're right and that we shouldn't continue things any further. I'll probably hurt you. Eventually. x" I was genuinely confused, again, because I'm so inexperienced and because I really did start to like him.

I ended up leaving England very disappointed because even though he said he wanted to stay away from me because he didn't have the best of intentions, he still couldn't! And ended up asking for sexual favors (which I didn't give him, OF COURSE) after saying he wanted to continue a discussion about the differences between girls and boys in his room. Even though this happened two days before I was set to leave, he avoided me the following day and, when I went to a club with a guy friend (complete coincidence - I only see now that it seemed like I might have played M or something), he looked really sad, but didn't say ANYTHING to me my last night before leaving for America!

He actually ended up coming to America later that summer as he had planned to months before he met me, and because my aunt died in August and I was thinking that it wasn't worth it to have such negative feelings, I contacted him via fb message after two months of no contact, and M responded, apologizing for the way things ended. I thought we could have become friends since we didn’t know each other, but I didn’t realize that I still had mixed emotions and was lying to myself. I invited him to my party in New York, where mutual friends would be, and he told me that he would definitely let me know whether or not he could come. He left the country never saying anything!

All that shadiness, plus the fact that he never really tried to contact me after the fact (and he never asked me how I was or didn’t bother to respond), made me angry again, so I deleted him (something I never do because I know how petty it is) to finally get over him. A week later, I got a fake fb request (and I know it's him because there are references to things on my page) and he made a reference to a very sappy song about love. After a month of no contact, I sent another request and apologized – I was honest about getting caught up in a feeling and needing space, and he accepted enthusiastically and said that he still wanted to be friends, just that he was terrible at responding to messages. He used not really writing back to his grandmother as an excuse. I told him about the deaths in my family, not to gain sympathy from him, but really to indirectly explain the reason why I was acting a bit erratic earlier. I didn’t expect a response from him any time soon, and I thought that I was fine once again since I really wasn’t looking for anything but friendship given the recent losses, but he never said ANYTHING!

To make matters more “interesting,” he was online on facebook all the time doing very trivial things, yet he couldn’t be bothered with writing me back! Anyway, I can tell when he looks at my page, and I noticed that he was mimicking things I was doing on my own page, and was just hanging around online (something he never did before). I simply ignored it because I didn’t want to be involved in this nonexistent thing. Anyway, I recently found out that he’s starting to see a girl back on his campus, someone he was friends with last year. They seem to be into each other, but given the way he wanted sex so much and wasn’t willing to try to be serious with me, I’m a bit suspicious.

I guess this is the main gist of my question: I know that he didn’t take me seriously and only wanted sex, but why? Is it because he’s really immature? Because he simply didn’t care? Or he thought that we wouldn’t have fit well? And what about this new girl? Might this potential immaturity still be present there? I know that I shouldn’t care and since nothing serious at all happened, I should just move on completely, but I’m still having some trouble. I’m just wondering why he went about it all so badly. I know that there are much more relevant questions to be answered, so I really appreciate the time you’ve taken to read all of this nonsense I know that this goes beyond astrology, but I’m still interested in looking into it especially since I think our synastry/composite was supposed to be good (because of the houses), despite what happened. Here are some placements:

M’s

ASC: Taurus/Gemini
Sun: Cancer 3rd house
Moon: Leo/Virgo 5th house
Mercury: Leo
Mars Taurus 12th house
Venus: Cancer 3rd house
Jupiter: Virgo 5th house
Vertex: Libra 6th house
Eros: Gemini 1st house
Psyche: Virgo 4th house
IC: Cancer/ Cancer Midheaven
Saturn: Aquarius 10th house
Uranus/Neptune: Capricorn 9th house
North Node: Capricorn 8th house

Mine:

ASC: Gemini/Cancer
Sun: Libra 4th house
Moon: Aries 11th house
Mercury: Virgo 3rd house
Mars: Gemini 12th house
Venus: Libra 4th house
Jupiter: Leo 2nd house
Vertex: Scorpio 5th house
Eros: Leo 2nd house
Psyche: Gemini 12th house
Saturn/Neptune/Uranus: Capricorn 7th house
North Node: Aquarius 8th house

And thank you for taking the time to read this insanely long and very insignificant question, compared to other terrible and trying experiences women have had... I'm simply that slow, I guess. You patience is very much appreciated

(Also, I hope I'm putting this in the right place?)


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Randall
Webmaster

Posts: 15012
From: Saturn next to Charmainec
Registered: Apr 2009

posted January 22, 2012 01:29 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Randall     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Welcome!

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Ami Anne
Moderator

Posts: 26846
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010

posted January 22, 2012 01:31 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Ami Anne     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Hi there and welcome
Could you make the chart a little bigger, or give a link, Sweetie?

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Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal


http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/

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unikestyle
Newflake

Posts: 13
From: Los Angeles, CA, US
Registered: Jan 2011

posted January 22, 2012 01:49 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for unikestyle     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
How do I put up a link? Sorry, I'm not great with technology, haha

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SaggiMC
Knowflake

Posts: 341
From: UK
Registered: Jan 2012

posted January 22, 2012 01:55 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for SaggiMC     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
please repost reducing the orb ratio down to 40% as the max orb in synastry is 3'

long distance relationships http://www.barbaradeangelis.com/advice_compatibility.asp#7

soulmate connections http://www.cafeastrology.com/articles/soulmateastrology.html http://www.synastry.us/soulmate_indicators.asp http://www.ehow.com/video_4438856_soul-mates-astrology.html
“The heart of an astrological chart according to esoteric astrology are the moon's nodes, or points where the moon intercepts the earth's orbit around the sun. Your nodes diametrically oppose one another. So if your south node is in Capricorn, your north node would be in the opposite sign of Cancer and your soul's path would be moving from masculine, earthy Capricorn energies, into light, feminine Cancer”. http://www.the-soulmate-site.com/astrological-soulmate.html http://thezodiac.com/soulmates2.htm
http://www.cafeastrology.com/articles/sexualattractionastrology.html

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I love the parable, “If you give a man a fish, you feed him for a day, BUT if you teach him how to fish, you feed him for life.”

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unikestyle
Newflake

Posts: 13
From: Los Angeles, CA, US
Registered: Jan 2011

posted January 22, 2012 02:04 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for unikestyle     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote

Hope this is better? Thanks for taking a look and for the links!

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unikestyle
Newflake

Posts: 13
From: Los Angeles, CA, US
Registered: Jan 2011

posted January 25, 2012 12:47 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for unikestyle     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Sorry to be a bother, but what does reducing the orb do? I'm quite new to this, and I'm more used to looking at composite charts

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