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Author
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Topic: may i please have a reading, so confused
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PhoenixFire
Knowflake Posts: 281
From: The Crossing
Registered: Jun 2009
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posted July 22, 2012 11:31 AM
  
Well after lots and lots of turmoil, asked my spouse to leave our house today ): Relationship has been one more of friends/roomies for last three years, distance increased after our child came along. He is basically a good person & great parent, not good at being emotionally available. I feel he took it for granted, put us on backburner, thinking Id always be there waiting.A few months ago, I developed strong feelings for a friend. This scared me as a big red flag that for this to even happen, my marriage is in big big trouble. I didnt do anything physical w the friend, but did disclose to my spouse & we decided to try and work things out & Id let go of my friend. Well I thought we were making good progress, and had hope even if my feelings for my friend remain. Then this weekend, he lied to me about meeting up w friends from work for a get together and they actually stayed out late at a bar w a female friend in tow (which im not ok with). He disnt let me know at all, just showed up early morning. I also saw questionable photos on his phone which he maintains were forwarded by friends. maintains nothing went on but drinking. Im upset and dont know what to do as I never got further than talking w my friend, and realized it was wrong and fessed up while he didnt fess up until he got caught, and now I dont think I can trust we can really work things out. Not sure if I should just seperate and take a break or give it another chance. so confusing. Never wanted things to get this bad and thought we were progressing then he throws it all out w deception. dont know to believe if this girl is really just a work peer or has bad intentions. any insight so appreciative. when i read my own cards on it, keep getting the chatiot, kimg of saords ( my friend) and judgement. my insight right now is clouded though ): IP: Logged |
Venia
Knowflake Posts: 576
From: Germany
Registered: Oct 2010
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posted July 22, 2012 01:52 PM
Hello PhoenixFire,I understand what you're going through. It is not an easy task. And I salute you for being so honest to your partner. Do you think he did this just to test you or maybe out of reaction? I pulled three cards for you as for what does the Universe wants you to know for this. The Hanged man popped while shuffling... You need to wait before any decision is taken. The Two of Cups - Temperance - Nine of Wands The connection is there and he does care, you just to give it some time and be patient before leaping into any rush decisions. Things will fall in place but it needs some work... A bit more.
So, conclusion. Don't rush and give it time. He will be eventually be willing to work things out for your family. Hope it helped  Be well, V
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friture
Knowflake Posts: 90
From:
Registered: May 2012
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posted July 22, 2012 02:06 PM
Okay, this is my novice take, so you can take it with a heap of salt I did do a marriage spread (it was written in Mandarin):
(I asked 'How is PhoenixFire's current marriage situation')
1 Past situation - Fool
2 Current situation - Emperor
3 Future - World
4 Near future Issue & Action - Hermit
5 Fear & Challenge - Sun
6 Hope for Marriage - King of Swords
7 Outcome - 8 of Swords I also asked 'What can PhoenixFire do to resolve her marriage situation?'
I got 3 cards (no position meanings):
Magician, 8 of Wands, Knight of Swords My really novice interpretation:
You have it within you to deal with the current situation, to shift it to your advantage, but it is advisable that you do it quick and cut through the bs, some confrontation is needed but approach it rationally, to talk things out? (Sounds easy but I understand in your situation it is easier said then done.) However Knight of Swords could also mean to think of long term consequences before acting/speaking. Anyway, if the reading is totally off, I apologize.
I just hope everything will be fine for you soon.
Love,
Friture IP: Logged |
PhoenixFire
Knowflake Posts: 281
From: The Crossing
Registered: Jun 2009
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posted July 22, 2012 05:35 PM
Thank you so much It was so hard to disclose about feelings for my friend, but am relieved it is out in the open. I dislike deception, just couldnt go into an affair and feel ok about it. I think he did do what he did mostly lashing out because of hurt. He has Mars in Scorpio, I think despite it all he does still care very deeply or he would have done something much worse. With all this confusion & mercury rx, yes think best thing to do for now is take time to really think & try to feel centered. I dont want to make a decision based on fear/hurt, want to really think it through and feel at peace w it. We are on speaking terms again & he decided to come back and try to really work it out as long as I continue distance w the friend. I accepted as long as he is clear if he can move past this & be truly honest w me. Ive talked to my friend about my decision, he isnt happy w it but I think he will respect it. IP: Logged |
littlecloud
Moderator Posts: 1416
From:
Registered: Nov 2010
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posted July 22, 2012 09:46 PM
From all the readings and yours (sorry didn't read your last response) was that thinking with a clear head will help you. A part of me thinks that the pictures and female friend came after you talking to your husband about your relationship. I feel like he wanted to make you jealous. Your own spread I see as, taking control, thinking clearly, and a second chance. From friture I see:
Love was blind
You're being protective don't want to get hurt
the matter will come to an end
You need a little time alone
Seeing the good/being blinded
Thinking clearly and putting logic ahead of emotions running wild.
Fear taking over, letting fear guide you. the 3 cards
you can quickly take control and manipulate the situation and quickly cut the BS IP: Logged |
friture
Knowflake Posts: 90
From:
Registered: May 2012
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posted July 23, 2012 01:21 AM
quote:
Originally posted by littlecloud:
From all the readings and yours (sorry didn't read your last response) was that thinking with a clear head will help you. A part of me thinks that the pictures and female friend came after you talking to your husband about your relationship. I feel like he wanted to make you jealous. Your own spread I see as, taking control, thinking clearly, and a second chance. From friture I see:
Love was blind
You're being protective don't want to get hurt
the matter will come to an end
You need a little time alone
Seeing the good/being blinded
Thinking clearly and putting logic ahead of emotions running wild.
Fear taking over, letting fear guide you. the 3 cards
you can quickly take control and manipulate the situation and quickly cut the BS
Ooooh thank you littlecloud for the aid. Helps me learn
IP: Logged |
littlecloud
Moderator Posts: 1416
From:
Registered: Nov 2010
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posted July 23, 2012 02:48 AM
No problem. Sometimes the cards speak clearly to me (not always). In your case the King of Swords came up repeatedly which meant his message was very dominant; logic, thinking clearly, mastery of communication, taking a step back emotionally...And now that I have read your post before mine, I think you dealt with it very well. IP: Logged |
PhoenixFire
Knowflake Posts: 281
From: The Crossing
Registered: Jun 2009
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posted July 23, 2012 10:37 AM
Thank you, littlecloud. I was confusing King of Swords as literal for the other person, because he is an Air sign and profession corresponds. message of stepping back to think makes more sense, as when it comes down to it, the other person is a symptom of what is wrong. The true core issue is that my marriage has been falling apart for awhile now, and neither my spouse nor I have really wanted to address this. The elephant in the room just kept getting bigger, the more we denied it. Feelings for my friend mainly resulted as an attempt to fill the void. Im really glad stopped myself in time, as even if my spouse and I separate for good, must grieve loss of marriage & heal/find myself before even thinking of a new emotional connection. Things feel really crummy right now, but really want to feel more clear before making a life altering decision. Im glad my spouse and I are at last being really open about how unhappy we have both been feeling, even if these conversations are painful, its the only way to have a real second chance. IP: Logged | |
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