posted October 13, 2012 04:06 PM            

I feel like in my current relationship the passion is dwindling quickly, and has ever since we last slept together, and I said I loved him - but later corrected myself when he seemed weird about it, like it was too soon, and apologized and said I gave a statement that was too strong but that I cared deeply anyway. Awkward I know, but it was an in the moment thing - it happens. We've known each other for 3 months so it's not like we just met 2 weeks ago. But ever since then, I feel like there's been some sort of friction on his part, and I feel almost bitter towards him and glad to be away, yet the idea of breaking up isn't appealing either. So I want to know ideally -

a. should we stick it out? Why all the sudden friction because of our sex life presumably? I wanted to be more sexual/sensual to be able to be closer to him but it seemed to backfire like it made it worse for him.

b. what's really going on with his heart - and my heart too?

posted October 13, 2012 04:09 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by sweet-scorpion:
I'm in need of some kind of tarot reading for help. I feel like my own energies are too blocked to give myself an accurate reading at the moment... I don't have the spiritual strength to try.

I feel like in my current relationship the passion is dwindling quickly, and has ever since we last slept together, and I said I loved him - but later corrected myself when he seemed weird about it, like it was too soon, and apologized and said I gave a statement that was too strong but that I cared deeply anyway. Awkward I know, but it was an in the moment thing - it happens. We've known each other for 3 months so it's not like we just met 2 weeks ago. But ever since then, I feel like there's been some sort of friction on his part, and I feel almost bitter towards him and glad to be away, yet the idea of breaking up isn't appealing either. So I want to know ideally -

a. should we stick it out? Why all the sudden friction because of our sex life presumably? I wanted to do that to become closer to him but it seemed to backfire.

b. what's really going on with his heart - and my heart too?

Thanks to anyone who offers help with either/both inquiries.

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Question A: I pulled the tower. A collapse of some sort? But maybe this isn't so bad! It could signify a rebirth I am sure!

Question B: I pulled the hermit. Wow...two sort of negative cards in a row I apologize. I would like to interpret it as being a sort of time for reflection for both you and him, think about your relationship needs, and think about his (or maybe he should think about his). When you reflect upon this it will be clear what path you should take

posted October 13, 2012 04:23 PM            

Will pull some oracle cards as i find them more revealing than tarot

You ~ Old Wounds
Him ~ Bad Choices
Relationship ~ Fantasy, naivety, bad attitude

Sorry it doesnt look good ...he is pushing all your buttons and bringing up your issues, he feels he has made the wrong choice and the relationship is quite immature and based on what it could be rather than the reality of it. I also feel you could both end up being quite cruel to each other if it went on. I would say step away and work on yourself before having him back in your life

posted October 13, 2012 08:51 PM            

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Originally posted by redshoes:
He is scared like lots of other men when they hear the L word and the C word (commitment)~ am hearing this story over and over...a collective fear of men!

Will pull some oracle cards as i find them more revealing than tarot

You ~ Old Wounds
Him ~ Bad Choices
Relationship ~ Fantasy, naivety, bad attitude

Sorry it doesnt look good ...he is pushing all your buttons and bringing up your issues, he feels he has made the wrong choice and the relationship is quite immature and based on what it could be rather than the reality of it. I also feel you could both end up being quite cruel to each other if it went on. I would say step away and work on yourself before having him back in your life

Sorry it wasnt better, but i feel you know this anyway x

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I can kinda see the truth in this...

In a way I feel the old wounds is the most correct of all. But not really in a bad way. Being with him brought up a lot of old insecurities with my appearance and letting a guy really see me for who I am but in a way the pain made me grow.

He is making a lot of bad choices right now in life with alcoholism and other things, and wants help yet can't accept it just yet... troubling. He also is insecure about himself in love. Like he wouldn't be good enough for me.

posted October 13, 2012 08:53 PM            

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Originally posted by asclibrasagsun:
Question A: I pulled the tower. A collapse of some sort? But maybe this isn't so bad! It could signify a rebirth I am sure!

Question B: I pulled the hermit. Wow...two sort of negative cards in a row I apologize. I would like to interpret it as being a sort of time for reflection for both you and him, think about your relationship needs, and think about his (or maybe he should think about his). When you reflect upon this it will be clear what path you should take

Tell me if I am totally off

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No, they aren't really that negative.

Sex+ actual romance and finally doing it with me was a huge shake up in his life... and right now he might need some introspective time and me too especially to make sense of how this is going to change our futures.

I read online somewhere this card combo is actually representative of Mars in Virgo and he has this placement.

posted October 13, 2012 09:07 PM            

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Originally posted by sweet-scorpion:
No, they aren't really that negative.

Sex+ actual romance and finally doing it with me was a huge shake up in his life... and right now he might need some introspective time and me too especially to make sense of how this is going to change our futures.

I read online somewhere this card combo is actually representative of Mars in Virgo and he has this placement.

I feel like also, this could mean that instead of things really going to hell we just need time to process the changes that came with a sexual act. The Tower I've seen, often comes when some major change happens but not always a break-up, more often, sex/orgasm. It kinda makes sense in a way. We might just not be ready to get back into something heavy like that quite yet... and that's just fine with me.

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posted October 13, 2012 11:06 PM            

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Originally posted by EmpressMendez:
The Tower and Hermit to answer those questions look pretty clear to me. I believe those cards are saying that you two will choose to go your separate ways. That's how I see those cards when reading those questions (I didn't pull them for you, but just felt like sharing my pov).

http://lovedovetarot.com/2012/04/12/the-tarot-hermit-in-love/

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Well yeah... it goes without saying that a huge issue is as in your article, his lower sex drive and my desire to have sex.

Just tonight I was talking on the phone w/ a female relative about how he acts very passive and almost too feminine for me, and that I want to have a man who can be very masculine especially in the bedroom setting. And he's just not it.

I feel like the Tower shows that our sex life brought about revelations to me, wisdom inside - also represented by the Hermit in a new way - about what I really want.

It sounds harsh but if he doesn't stop avoiding our sexuality I'm going to have to move on. Maybe it'll take a bit more time so I'm not going to dump him coldly since I'm compassionate and have a heart with these issues.... but I wouldn't be opposed to seeing other people. It's a very hard situation for me since to begin with he appeared self-confident, assured, a little distant... and now I'm playing that sort of role minus the slight neediness now and again. He's actually being the more passive and romantic one and one very important detail that stands out to me I forgot to mention is when he said: "Too much sex just... ruins it." This to me is absurd. But I feel it's causing the block between us.

So maybe this card combo is also saying, Wait and think deep and hard before you decide to shake things up with a fight or a break up. Wait before you act on impulse.

posted October 13, 2012 11:56 PM            

I just don't see anything positive there, but to each their own. I hope things work out for you though. A break might be needed..some space until things clear up and maybe you can rebuild that Tower again soon after. Right now though, those 2 cards look negative in the situation.

posted October 14, 2012 12:15 AM            

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Originally posted by EmpressMendez:
Hmm, you can put it that way if you like and wait, but if those cards showed up for me and my question was "should we stick it out?" the tower is screaming no. New foundations have to be built. For working things out I would want 3 of Pentacles or 8 of Pentacles, 7 of Pentacles, Aces, pages, Star..heck any card but Tower (okay not the 10 of Swords or the other icky cards) etc another "work out" card. Then, "what are his thoughts and feelings" sure if you get the 2 of cups, 3 of cups, empress..any other card I would say great! Go for it..but the hermit? he's so lonely and withdrawn..so single..

I just don't see anything positive there, but to each their own. I hope things work out for you though. A break might be needed..some space until things clear up and maybe you can rebuild that Tower again soon after. Right now though, those 2 cards look negative in the situation.

Whoaaaaa, a guy complaining about too much sex?! That's a first, lol. I just feel like he might think you're getting too attached to him when you said "I love you", and that caused him to feel withdrawn since he might not feel the same yet and doesn't want to hurt you.

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posted October 14, 2012 09:43 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by EmpressMendez:
Ok asc, I will tomorrow . I will probably create a new thread with your name.

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posted October 14, 2012 10:03 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by EmpressMendez:
Hmm, you can put it that way if you like and wait, but if those cards showed up for me and my question was "should we stick it out?" the tower is screaming no. New foundations have to be built. For working things out I would want 3 of Pentacles or 8 of Pentacles, 7 of Pentacles, Aces, pages, Star..heck any card but Tower (okay not the 10 of Swords or the other icky cards) etc another "work out" card. Then, "what are his thoughts and feelings" sure if you get the 2 of cups, 3 of cups, empress..any other card I would say great! Go for it..but the hermit? he's so lonely and withdrawn..so single..

I just don't see anything positive there, but to each their own. I hope things work out for you though. A break might be needed..some space until things clear up and maybe you can rebuild that Tower again soon after. Right now though, those 2 cards look negative in the situation.

Whoaaaaa, a guy complaining about too much sex?! That's a first, lol. I just feel like he might think you're getting too attached to him when you said "I love you", and that caused him to feel withdrawn since he might not feel the same yet and doesn't want to hurt you.

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I see what you mean.

I feel like these cards could also represent that in my heart I know he isn't right for me and I soon want to break up with him.... if things don't get any better.

I didn't mean to say I love you. It was a mistake. And I expressed that although I do care deeply for him, it was too strong and I was sorry. It was an in the moment accident you know? I could kick myself for it... but I was just so caught up. But I thought that we got that behind us... I promised I wouldn't say words that were too strong anymore and he said he understood that I said it because I care so deeply but thought of the wrong words when I was in the moment. I can understand him being freaked by my mistake.

I feel like my sex drive is dying out from the whole thing too. It's just an awkward situation. The reason why he says that too much sex ruins a relationship is because a similar situation happened with his ex-gf, and he says that he likes to do it most of the time but to be fair, almost /every single time/ we've seen each other I've wanted to have sex. Not that there's anything wrong with that but I guess my libido is kinda high... LOL... so I think because he's more sensitive than me, he just gets worried that I won't value the emotional aspect of the relationship. That's what he's expressed. But he doesn't always deny us fooling around/having sex. I just think he gets pressured and has anxiety about it which makes him worry we're doing it too much.

posted October 14, 2012 10:04 AM            

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Originally posted by redshoes:
I agree with Empress, the hermit is a man or woman that wants and NEEDS to be alone..this isnt a relationship card ~ its about going within and not interacting with others

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I feel like he's forced himself to be apart from me the past few days, and I've secretly enjoyed the time apart. So yeah, I can see this being possible.