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Author Topic:   @Intuitivefish
tgem
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posted March 24, 2015 09:07 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for tgem     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Hi there! How are ya? I'm having some difficulty with a situation and I was hoping for some insight. Would you like to exchange?

I nanny for a little girl and she's giving me a lot of problems. She's very difficult, despite my constant attempts to be sweet and kind to her. Can you give some insight as to what is causing such problems with her? Thanks so very much.

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intuitivefish
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From: Europe
Registered: Aug 2014

posted March 24, 2015 02:56 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for intuitivefish     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
well other than "insight" I might be able to give professional help since I work with children

you could describe maybe whats going on and I can try and help in that way also.

but what I would say with intuition is this,
she is being a rebel towards you because she is rebeling against something to do with her mom I would say, not sure maybe it could be the dad, but I feel like she is feeling that she is not getting enough love or attention, she sees that you took on the role of her mom and she is rebeling against that.
She also wants things her way and she is not wanting to give in to anyone. I do believe she sees herself as much older than she is, so she equals the attempts you do as giving her love and attention.

my Q -
did A comment to E, about E ( girl he is seeing) blocking me off HIS facebook page.

so she with his password, blocked me, from his account/profile

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tgem
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posted March 24, 2015 03:19 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for tgem     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Wow, I would really appreciate some insight. She changed nannies and started with me a month ago. Apparently she changed nannies because the other wasn't giving her enough attention and the girl didn't have anyone her age to play with. She also had to be moved to another kindergarten class due to behavior issues. Although she is doing better in her new class, she is still on a behavior chart. The first month she really challenged me but her mom hired me becasue she said she wanted a STERN nanny. I have been sweet and kind to her but also very stern. I thought the rebellion would stop but she is still really tough with me ...and gives my son a hard time too (he's her age.) I thought they would play nice together but it's hard for them to get along. He is super sweet. Any insight would be appreciated. I'll be back with your question

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intuitivefish
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From: Europe
Registered: Aug 2014

posted March 24, 2015 03:29 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for intuitivefish     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
the thing is, I think she is used to getting her way, as it seems to me, he mother probably doesnt know how to and doesnt have the time and energy to deal with her, so changin nannies/ classes is the worst that can happen to the child.
children dont take well to changes like that and they know very well that they are being bounced around, the more things seem unstable ( the changes) the more she is taking advantage of this and rebeling the way she is.
I still think her main issue is her mother. Her mother is not there as much as she needs/wants.
I have "difficult" children in my group and trust me when I say, with me they are great and when they see the parent its a whole another world.

She NEEDS and actually craves stirnness, you see, children are like little puppies, they WANT boundaries if they dont get them they will use you and will think you are idiots who give a child anything they want.
I would say keep being stirn, yes ofcourse be loving but have better boundaries and keep at them, dont get soft, keep having a routine also.
an exact routine
i.e - breakfast at 8:30, play time until 9:15 then, MAKE her clean her toys, watch over her and make her pick up each toy, then have some activites and so on.
the way they have it in kindergardens, because thats a good thing for them, it gives them much needed discipline.

your bigger problem can be the parents not following throug with what you do and it all falls out of place.

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tgem
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posted March 24, 2015 03:55 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for tgem     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I pulled scythe-mountain-whip
With the mountain in the middle I see you were blocked. The scythe and whip surrounding the mountain shows there were arguements and heated discussions so she quickly cut you off. However the scythe, mountain and whip are all "no" cards in my deck so although the arguements caused the blocking of you on FB, I don't think he made a comment to her about it. In other words, "no" he didn't.

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intuitivefish
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From: Europe
Registered: Aug 2014

posted March 24, 2015 03:57 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for intuitivefish     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
thank you.

Do you mind another question please.

Will me and him continue normal communication after this? I mean will this change/ruin how he is with me?
since things have been going pretty good so far.

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tgem
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posted March 24, 2015 03:58 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for tgem     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Ok thank you soooooo very much!! I will definitely do all this. Can you, by any chance, see if she will continue to stay with me for the next two or three months? She's tough but I hate to see her get bounced around again.

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intuitivefish
Knowflake

Posts: 1698
From: Europe
Registered: Aug 2014

posted March 24, 2015 04:03 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for intuitivefish     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I work in a kindergarden so I am very familiar with what you tell me
also ahve a talk with her mother, you need the support and the mother continuing the disciplin you put in.

I feel a max of maybe 4-5 months with you. I feel like you will want to find something else, it will take too much a toll on you and your energy.

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tgem
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posted March 24, 2015 04:12 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for tgem     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Ok I'll sure do these things! Thanks so much for all your help❤️

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intuitivefish
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posted March 24, 2015 04:20 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for intuitivefish     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
you are welcome

sorry, not sure if you saw I put another question if you up for it

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tgem
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posted March 24, 2015 04:47 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for tgem     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Oh just saw your second question. Ok I'm out now but I can to this in about an hour or so.

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tgem
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posted March 24, 2015 06:34 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for tgem     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Ok as to whether you and A will continue normal conversation after the FB incident?
Birds-clouds-tree
Pulled clover to clarify clouds
I think he's uncertain about it. But you two will still talk (clover and birds). With the tree there it may start very slow but grow in frequency over time.

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intuitivefish
Knowflake

Posts: 1698
From: Europe
Registered: Aug 2014

posted March 25, 2015 01:24 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for intuitivefish     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Thanks

If you need more help about the child, let me know I will try to if I can.

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tgem
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posted March 25, 2015 07:35 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for tgem     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Will do thanks. Had a conference with her mother last night and it went really well. So hopefully things will improve soon

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