posted May 09, 2015 12:33 AM            

I tend to get what I want in career or achieve even the seemingly impossible tasks or ambition almost miraculously. This is the reason of me still living because I truly enjoy creating new methods and making it work and if I experience huge loss, I knew I will be able to turn it around if given some time (and it usually end up that way as well). I never had any fear in my career. Slight worry, yes, but it fuels my interests more.

I love danger/risks because it tests my intuition and they are usually right or if not, my 'plan B' or 'C' will turn things around. I have so much belief in myself & others, that people in turn also believe in me which help facilitate whatever my plan at the time. My perseverance also helped turned my family situation around after 17 gruelling years and I don't regret it.

I don't even fear possible death, when I heard a few potential 'things' from my doctor, I ended up just saying OK, that gives me enough time to try things, at least there's a timeline.

But My (romantic) love life seems to suffer. I don't seem to have similar confidence in love life situation. In fact I seem to sacrifice a lot in love, I am not as confident - wishing someone would choose me instead of going for what I want with all the risks (in the far past, usually I would be able to do this if I am not invested in the person but I will back off when I realize they start to like me too deeply.)

It does not help that I do not mind being on my own, so I don't have the rush to get married/what have you, so no desperate push to getting what I 'need' (like a partner et)

My pattern is that I would quickly give up if my person of interest has someone else (or dating around), instead of be confident and do my own thing and go for what I want. I also tend to be very nurturing and very different, in which I know now it is not a different side of me but just uncharted territory of my deepest core of being. So it's not like my work face is my defense, no, both are actually myself but I repress my vulnerable side e.g: love so I am dumb and stupid about it.

But I wonder why the opposite approach- why am I so vulnerable, so scared in getting the love i want to the point I almost have no perseverance, yet so strong in everything else? Why the fear, even if seemingly I don't fear the death itself? This really is perplexing to me.

There has to be a way to balance this, no?

Can anyone see/read charts and help me figure out why the paradox/polarity?

no quoting please thanks, I will read for you in return - a glimpse of Karmic insight - if you provide me your email and birth data.

posted May 09, 2015 02:19 AM            

The first thing I noticed about your chart was that you have venus square uranus. Venus in pisces is very sensitive when it comes to love, artistic and romantic. Uranus is unpredicatable and wants freedom. Perhaps it's a fear of commitment that you have that you hadn't been fully aware of(uranus in the 12th house of hidden things). Whenever there is a square in a chart it can be challenging it shows balance is needed for both sides. I have the square myself, I spent most of my 20's studying and didn't really pay much attention to my love life. I have a need for relationship but i dont like to feel trapped. They say people with this square might take a little longer to settle down, but I feel im almost ready now. I think perhaps as well as balance we need someone who is both romantic and accepts that we need to be able to do our own thing. Balance is key.

Also you have a scorpio moon. Scorpio moon have intense emotions and dont trust so easily. Moon can show where we are most comfortable. It's in your 10th house of career. It's like you find solice in your work.

You have capricorn ascendent so your chart ruler is saturn, it's in the 12th house - do you have a really deep fear of failure?

You have very strong emotions but you dont come across that way? Maybe people think you are not interested(Im assuming here).

Let me know what you think, all feedback is good feedback.

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pls dont quote

posted May 09, 2015 02:49 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by VacantGazer:
They say people with this square might take a little longer to settle down, but I feel im almost ready now. I think perhaps as well as balance we need someone who is both romantic and accepts that we need to be able to do our own thing. Balance is key.

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True, I feel I do need freedom (to work) yet I know I can be a wife if needed to, I like nurturing people but now I realize I need to be nurtured as well, but I don't know how to let others do it.

quote:

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Also you have a scorpio moon. Scorpio moon have intense emotions and dont trust so easily. Moon can show where we are most comfortable. It's in your 10th house of career. It's like you find solice in your work.

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Yeah I find solace at work, and my emotions are very intense but always get 'sacrificed' in love. And I am open to people but you are right, I don't trust them when I have a gut feeling they want something from ME just because I was being nice (I will usually offer help but dislike when people start asking for non-professional favour when they do not know me well personally)

quote:

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You have capricorn ascendent so your chart ruler is saturn, it's in the 12th house - do you have a really deep fear of failure?

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I used to, but not anymore at work. In love, who knows...

quote:

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You have very strong emotions but you dont come across that way? Maybe people think you are not interested(Im assuming here).

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Right on. People realized it too late i'm interested usually, because I don't know my intention was never that clear....

posted May 09, 2015 10:06 AM            

But the chart only shows energies we have available to us, it doesn't mean we/things are destined to be like this forever. People change over time.

I should also note, that you are in the early stages of your first Saturn return, I think you are maybe about 2 years younger than me. Saturn returns can be tough at times, but they help us learn, and strip away the things we no longer need or work for us. Especially as saturn is your chart ruler, I think this period will be significant for you, and can benefit you in alot of ways in the end. You will learn alot about yourself. I think it's your fears that are coming to the surface, but you will over come them. I didnt really realise what i wanted or what was really important to me until i was going through my saturn return.

You have MC in libra. Libra is about balance and is a sign of relationships, so I think you can and will learn to balance work life with private life. It just takes a bit of time. I think as we get older we become more like our midheaven.

This is my assumption, im still an amateur in astrology, if anyone has a differing view please feel free to correct me

posted May 10, 2015 02:07 AM            

I have 3 questions, two are yes/no q's.

Can I ask you a yes/no relating to Karma(im kind of scared to know the details of it lol)?
I think my karma is related to my love life(I have asteroid karma exactly conjunct my venus, a few points in draconic and natal tell me this is my karma). I think it is strong karma as venus is my chart ruler. Is this true?

My second q, how is work going to go for me in the next few months?

Am I over cautious with trusting people?

Please dont quote my questions will edit out later.

posted May 10, 2015 02:19 AM            

I have had very mixed readings about my bf, J. We are long distance, meeting a few times a year. Neither can move plus we both like our independence, I now feel it's either make or break time. Could you please read what lies ahead. Thank you.

posted May 10, 2015 02:21 AM            

If you wish, email me at my username @ mail dot com, your birth details, and I can look up your karma for you.

i will be back for the rest of your reading

my question, just one:

Will SH follow up with his job offer within next week or has he changed his mind?

posted May 10, 2015 03:27 AM            

Ascendant in Capricorn 4
Sabian Symbol: A group of merry-makers are embarking in a large canoe on the
magic little lantern-lit lake at the resort.

posted May 10, 2015 04:15 AM            

Please email me your birth data for the karmic reading so I can generate the chart on my own email me.

how is work going to go for me in the next few months?

5 card spread for you has been casted- it covers every element relating to your work. From what I see so far, it shows you are in crossroad. Did you just find a new job or considering a change in career?

Two of Wands, Eight of Cups, Two of Swords, Knight of Pentacles, Seven of Wands.

Two of wands shows me you have been considering to do something else for your career or job, or have been planning something in terms of your career or job. You are ok with your current situation (could denote stagnancy), Either way you have been thinking about some other prospects for a bit.

Your intellectual side (logic) shows 8 of cups. Seems like you are leaving old ways- or leaving a rut you were in. Something happened and you may have been trying to find a better way to work through life, finding new hobbies. The old way does not satisfy you anymore.

Your feelings are ruled by two of swords. This tells me even though you are wishing for a bit of a change, you are still wary about making actual move away from the past. You are ruminating the pros and cons. Seems like you have seen a new way to work- and currently is thinking of pursuing it even if hesitant.

Will your chosen way works or not? It will as it is ruled by Knight of Pents but you need to work hard on it… be cautious and pay attention to details.

Your energy will be quite robust- as it is represented by Seven of Wands. Pursue whatever you are pursuing with great vigour. Whatever you choose this upcoming 3-4 months, will end up taking some time to adjust, but you will prevail.

Overall, seems like work would be fine though the theme is to power through any stagnancy. Does this resonate?

Am I over cautious with trusting people?

Right away, the Hanged Man fell down and 8 of pentacles comes up.

Seems like you know well why you do not trust people easily. It is not something that you hold on without any real base. You have been cultivating this for a bit. Are you overly cautious? Yes a bit- seems like in some cases it delays you the gratification you so richly deserve. It shows work on your mental & physical state to achieve a good synthesis (mind : hanged man . physical & heart = 8 pents). Try to stop and ponder if your mistrust is based on logic, or fear that someone or a situation force upon you. Ask yourself if the people who receive such fear and mistrust deserves it.

posted May 10, 2015 04:29 AM            

For you, I cast 3 cards to see the truth of the situation plus outcome.

The fact of the situation is that despite you saying you both like independence, one or both of you actually have been wanting more. Queen of Cups shows up, indicating there is a wish for something more connected.

This is confirmed by the WORLD card - in this position it bespoke of belief- or assumption. There is some insincerity- either you or him, or even both- at play here. I do not mean cheating, more like you guys think you know what you seek- and very firm about it, however the position shows such firmness is probably questionable. What you really seek in a relationship- what do you wish for?

last card is feelings - The Fool. You are wishing for something to change for a while, but it has been stagnant - you wish by breaking up it will open each of you a new way, or shake the boat so a new path will come up so to say. But again, what do you really wish for?

But the synthesis is the Judgement. Seems like unless you take a hard look at the situation, it will be repeated again - with him or others.

posted May 10, 2015 06:26 AM            

With regards to trusting people, i do know why i dont trust so easily, and i know it is unfair not to trust others because of that, not everyone is the same. But i can't help it sometimes

I changed my mind regarding the Karma, I want to investigate a little bit more on my charts, i will come back at some point on it though

Now to your question

I asked will SH follow up on the job within the next week

I got

5D 4C JC
2 black 1 red = no probably not

5D shows the recent exchange between you both with regards to work, 4C in the present shows a little bit of restless and perhaps a bit of caution of in committing to this. I think he is represented by the JC(or it could be you having the qualities of the JC).

For clarification I got
2C and 7H
2C represents communication and can also show impatience. 7H is a card of doubts, it is an emotional card. It is a card that can show delays and broken plans.

with JC as outcome and along with 2C and 7H as clarifier I think it's possible you will eventually hear from him, but at the moment there is doubt and restlessness around him. It can go either way. I dont think you will hear from him regarding this within the next week.

Let me know if I make sense, I could be wrong, feedback helps with the card interpretation.
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Please dont quote my posts will edit out later

posted May 10, 2015 06:57 AM            

Your question: what lies ahead love wise for the next 4 months: High priestess, 8 of cups, Hierophant

The High Priestess shows that your ability to survive on hunches and intuition is quite good but that the knowledge you have acquired in life is a simple foundation and not something that props up your ego. There have been demands on your feelings where you have wanted to withdraw from a relationship. This is echoed by 8 of cups - there is something amiss in your relationship and you will choose to move away from it.

It looks as if you will meet someone else who will be wise - an individual who will bring clarity in your life and the role you play. You will gain in knowledge and find the answers you need. I pulled another card to clarify Hierophant and got 10 of pentacles – a good omen for love. The person you meet will be right for you – you will fit.

There could be an alternate meaning (wish I was intuitive!) that the knowledge you acquire will enable you to make the best of the current relationship. But I am more inclined towards the interpretation that you will meet someone else. Whatever the case, things are looking very hopeful for you.

posted May 10, 2015 07:36 AM            

so since my question is about next week, it makes sense

Thank you!

Astro keen : accurate, I dont want to be an agent of infidelity even if the guy claim to not see me ever that way, it is still iffy becuse he knows I have deep feelings for him, so I created the boundary.

posted May 10, 2015 10:02 AM            

if you have any more q's let me know

posted May 11, 2015 12:26 AM            

IQ? Does he/she offer service?

And haha, that sounds empowering, but yes well, it is not wrong. I have been very much involved in things that becomes greater and greater, but not by my own power. It's hard to explain but I understand what you mean. However I do wish for the experience of having a stable root- and learn also about love and commitment.