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Author Topic:   Sex/infatuation with cousin...please help.
melodiemelodie
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posted August 03, 2015 04:02 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for melodiemelodie     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
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melodiemelodie
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posted August 03, 2015 04:05 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for melodiemelodie     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
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happyleo
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posted August 03, 2015 04:09 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for happyleo     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Sorry, this is not a reading, but just so you know: it's extremely common to feel attracted to family members one didn't see for a long time (or you haven't ever seen before). In some states in the USA you have to first undergo therapy before you can get reunited to family members for this reason if the government is involved in that. Research it, it's true.
It's normal, but of course, not good.
There's a bigger chance the offspring of two cousins will be handicapped than the children between siblings! God forbid, but it's a fact.

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melodiemelodie
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posted August 03, 2015 04:16 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for melodiemelodie     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
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happyleo
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posted August 03, 2015 04:25 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for happyleo     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
You don't need to feel guilty, I mean it's EXTREMELY common, so common that people need to be prepared for reuniting, no matter if they think it's necessary or not, they are forced to undergo therapy... So, that tells you all.
I don't know how to help you otherwise... Just know it's not just you!
Also, it's taboo for good reason (the offspring problem)

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confusedaseff
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posted August 03, 2015 04:47 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for confusedaseff     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
it's alright. id make out with my cousin if i could too lol and we sorta grew up together haha

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FmVenusWLove
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posted August 03, 2015 05:16 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for FmVenusWLove     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Hi Melodie,
I agree with Happyleo and Confused - it's natural and there's no reason to beat yourself up or feel guilty about it.

Per your question, without his birth time it's a little difficult to pinpoint past life indicators. However I do see a few interesting things - I'm a novice student of astrology so maybe someone more experienced can jump in and pin point something I missed.

His South Node conjuncts your Venus: indicates you may have had some kind of romantic relationship in a past life - typically I hear this means you may have been husband and wife. I had this with my ex and we were indeed married in a past life.

His Neptune conjunct your Saturn: supposedly this is a highly karmic aspect indicating a "star-crossed" lovers situation in a past life. Not sure about the outer planets in aspect to each other because they are of course generational, but I've read multiple interpretations that say that this is still a significant aspect and one that is highly spiritual.

His Chiron aspecting your Venus: indicates another romantic link between you two.

His Pluto square your Moon: an emotionally intense combination. Again, likely indicating some kind of past karma between you two.

Idk...in my opinion it is likely there is some past life connection between you two. Again, without a birth time for him it's a little hard. The angles and house overlays would play a big part in deciphering what role you played in each other's lives.

@happyLeo - I'm curious where you got your information. I'm not trying to start a fire here, but the chances of having a child with genetic complications is ABSOLUTELY higher with siblings than with it is with first cousins. Even so, first generation children of siblings AND first cousins typically will not exhibit extreme birth defects unless there is already a known genetic disorder/illness prevalent in the family. In fact, women over the age of 45 are (if I remember correctly) 3-5 times more likely to birth a child with health complications than two first cousins are.

Genetic complications arise when multiple generations of cousins/siblings have children together. So Melodie, if you were to have a child with your cousin, there would be a slightly elevated chance you two would have a child with some kind of genetic defect (keep in mind, this isn't always some kind of mental disorder - it could be asthma, high blood pressure, or any other inherited health complication). But if your children marry their first cousins, and then their children marry their first cousins, the chance that all or some of their children might have a serious issue is greatly elevated.

Additionally, I'd like to point out that the taboo of first cousin marriage is a VERY recent phenomenon. It became an issue of interest in the West (USA specifically) in the late 1800s thanks largely in part to the eugenics movement. It was outlawed in the early 1900s without much research to back up the claims. Before that, it was considered to be highly advantageous and even 'romantic' to marry one's cousin. Darwin himself married his first cousin.

I'm not trying to say that you should go off and marry your cousin Melodie, lol. I'm only trying to reinforce that it is not really as big of a deal as people make it out to be and the "dangers" associated with first cousin marriage tend to be exaggerated.

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happyleo
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posted August 03, 2015 05:24 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for happyleo     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Thank you, sorry, I was obviously poorly informed. It's just the aristo gossiping in my circle, I apologise
But interesting!
Merci.

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FmVenusWLove
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posted August 03, 2015 05:34 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for FmVenusWLove     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Haha, no worries Happy So sorry for calling you out like that. My Psych/Anthro degree just got fired up and needed to jump in the discussion, lol.

De rien!

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sunnybunny
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posted August 04, 2015 11:23 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for sunnybunny     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
,

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sunnybunny
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posted August 04, 2015 11:39 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for sunnybunny     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
i've been infatuated with a cousin too, we no longer speak and we're not friends now, just sharing my experience, it's called GSA, genetic sexual attraction. it's probably because you were "raised apart" and were deprived of the normal family bonding experience with him.
in our case too, the sex was mind-blowing..


"It's hard to get data on incest," he says. "It's probably more common than once thought. But from the data I've seen, and it's really lousy data, it shows that for the most part either the kids were raised apart, or the family is abusive and dysfunctional."

also, from a moral or biblical stand point it is NOT WRONG to even marry a cousin. no biblical restrictions on marrying cousins. in olden days it was not uncommon for 2nd cousins to marry, 1st cousins run the risk of birth defects, but 2nd cousins have the same risk as non-relatives which is hardly any increased chance for birth defects at all. you've done nothing WRONG.in the bible a cousin is not considered a close relative like a brother or sister, or a mother or father.

bible and cousin marraige"
http://www.cousincouples.com/?page=religion

news article:
http://abcnews.go.com/Health/Sex/story?id=4805439


Biblical Cousin Marriages

Each of the following individuals in scripture were in the lineage of Mary, Christ's mother, or Joseph, his "earthly" father, who were chosen by God to raise His son. Most, if not all, occurred (chronologically) after the time in which Levitican law was written. Zelophehad's daughters did as the LORD commanded Moses. Zelophehad's daughters, Mahlah, Tirzah, Hoglah, Milcah and Noah, married their cousins on their father's side (Numbers 36:1-11).

Milcah was married to her cousin, Nahor. They had a grand daughter named Rebekkah. In Genesis 24:48-51, the story unfolds of how, against all odds, God's direction for her to marry her cousin's son Isaac (first cousin once removed) is made crystal clear.

Isaac and Rebekkah had two son's. Jacob was the son whom was blessed to fulfill God's prophecy that the descendant's of Abraham (Jacob's grandfather, Isaac's father) would become a great nation. Isaac instructed Jacob to marry a daughter of Rebekkah's brother. Although he immediately fell in love and became engaged to his cousin Rachel, his uncle tricked him into first marrying Rachel's sister Leah. Although God blessed Jacob greatly, Jacob suffered much grief and heartache for having married both sisters. Jacob's descendants became what is now known as the twelve tribes of Israel. (Genesis chapters 19 and 29)

In I Chronicles 23:22, Eleazar's daughters married their first cousins. Very little detail is given of this event.

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angel4845
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posted August 04, 2015 12:52 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for angel4845     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by confusedaseff:
it's alright. id make out with my cousin if i could too lol and we sorta grew up together haha

LOL

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EmpressMendez
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posted August 04, 2015 12:57 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for EmpressMendez     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by happyleo:
Sorry, this is not a reading, but just so you know: it's extremely common to feel attracted to family members one didn't see for a long time (or you haven't ever seen before). In some states in the USA you have to first undergo therapy before you can get reunited to family members for this reason if the government is involved in that. Research it, it's true.
It's normal, but of course, not good.
There's a bigger chance the offspring of two cousins will be handicapped than the children between siblings! God forbid, but it's a fact.

No reading either, but my parents are distant relatives. I found out a couple of years ago when I signed up to a website called 23andme.com - I got ancestry DNA tests for my entire family (I thought I was adopted growing up because I look Indian). But anyway, turns out my parents are my parents..and they're distant relatives..

Just thought I'd share.

------------------
“So whatever you wish that others would do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets."

Tarot Readings by Me

Facebook - ReadingsbyAzul

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melodiemelodie
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posted August 04, 2015 03:50 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for melodiemelodie     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
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melodiemelodie
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posted August 04, 2015 03:59 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for melodiemelodie     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
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FmVenusWLove
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posted August 04, 2015 07:23 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for FmVenusWLove     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Aw, glad we could help MelodieMelodie. Seriously, it's not a huge deal but I understand why you might have felt bad about it. Let me know if you ever do track down his birth time. I'd be interested to take a look at your synastry

It sounds like he is likely one of your soulmates. I'm not an expert on this stuff, but I have similar feelings for someone who I've been told is a soulmate. The fact that you are family is also (I believe) a strong indication that your relationship may be very special. I've read a few sources that claim that family members are often people we carry very strong karmic or spiritual bonds with.

quote:
Originally posted by melodiemelodie:
My intuition has been guiding me to believd that we lived quite recently as we both have a very deep interest in WWII in Poland, especially in the Warsaw Uprising, so all those aspects that point to a past life make sense.

A small aside, I'm also very interested in the Warsaw uprising, but maybe for different reasons. My grandfather was a 2nd Lieutenant in the Armia Krajowa and was highly decorated for his deeds during the uprising and other battles. My grandmother was a POW before her camp was liberated by my grandfather's company.

A neat connection we have there

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Spica
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posted August 05, 2015 01:53 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Spica     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
The label of sin added to an act makes it sweeter to commit.

A secret between two makes them so close, they become one.

You've shared your vulnerability, guilt and secret with another being.

And that in turn, is a bliss to the soul.

It's a little doorway that was never supposed to be opened.

But when you opened it a bright white light shines through.

You might feel guilty today. But with time, you'll realize what a special experience it was. And you will look back at it giggling.

I think this was a beautiful and sacred situation. Everything about it, the awkwardness, the guilt and shame, the secretiveness of it. It's beautiful and naïve.

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melodiemelodie
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posted August 10, 2015 03:30 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for melodiemelodie     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
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melodiemelodie
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posted August 25, 2015 08:27 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for melodiemelodie     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:

A small aside, I'm also very interested in the Warsaw uprising, but maybe for different reasons. My grandfather was a 2nd Lieutenant in the Armia Krajowa and was highly decorated for his deeds during the uprising and other battles. My grandmother was a POW before her camp was liberated by my grandfather's company.

A neat connection we have there [/B]


I don't know if you have seen it but there is a film about the Uprising that was made 100% out of real footage; the colour was restored and narrators were added. It is phenomenal and up on YouTube, here's the link:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9_P2BFWNujg

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cherful24
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posted August 25, 2015 08:49 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for cherful24     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
So basically comes down to this... You guys met when you were grown up & thought that each other were hot... You can think a family member is hot, that's okay. But no it does not happen all the time, to have sex with your cousin or to be intimate with him in anyway. And if he's a blood cousin, obviously there is health complications.

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cherful24
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posted August 25, 2015 09:02 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for cherful24     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
You act like it was a love affair.... You're trying to make it seem something so beautiful like back in the old days when a black person wasn't supposed to be in love with a white person.....

.. This is not that kind of love affair. No health professional would deem this natural or healthy or normal Its not normal to have sex with a relative. Of course it's not healthy we all know the complications that happen with blood on blood relatives. In contrary to what others have said, no this is not normal. This is not normal behavior especially for adult behavior. I with an Ed.s in psychology would put a hold on this person if they've come to me & said that they've had sex multiple times with a family member. That alone based on the dms, proves someone's mental instability.

And your comment...almost romanticizing it... also tells me you're in need of a mental evaluation

I highly recommend each of you that have commented on participation in family intimacy and or condoning it, to seek professional help. A good psychologist or psychiatrist would benefit you all.

Feel free to Googl the mental Manuel for psychologist and psychiatrist: Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders

QUOTE]Originally posted by Spica:
The label of sin added to an act makes it sweeter to commit.

A secret between two makes them so close, they become one.

You've shared your vulnerability, guilt and secret with another being.

And that in turn, is a bliss to the soul.

It's a little doorway that was never supposed to be opened.

But when you opened it a bright white light shines through.

You might feel guilty today. But with time, you'll realize what a special experience it was. And you will look back at it giggling.

I think this was a beautiful and sacred situation. Everything about it, the awkwardness, the guilt and shame, the secretiveness of it. It's beautiful and naïve.[/QUOTE]

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melodiemelodie
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posted August 25, 2015 09:27 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for melodiemelodie     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by cherful24:
So basically comes down to this... You guys met when you were grown up & thought that each other were hot... You can think a family member is hot, that's okay. But no it does not happen all the time, to have sex with your cousin or to be intimate with him in anyway. And if he's a blood cousin, obviously there is health complications.

I appreciate your concern for my mental health Cherful, and would like to reassure you that I am well aware of the complications that could arise from this. I have undergone a full evaluation due to anxiety in recent months and have been deemed perfectly healthy; the anxiety being a direct result to being overworked/having too much on my plate so rest assured I would like to point out that in many cultures first cousin marriages are/were the norm. One of my best friends parents, who are Lebanese are first cousins. She and her brothers are healthy/normal and have not married cousins ; cultural practices in regards to this vary and while something may seem unthinkable and be very removed from you and your worldview, it does not make it wrong. That is besides the point. We are not trying to pursue a relationship, live on opposite sides of the world and will most probably see each other very briefly in a few years time, if at all. Anyway, I was not asking for a lecture or opinion, but was curious as to what astrological aspects would indicate karmic/past life links.

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Randall
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posted August 25, 2015 09:44 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Randall     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I see that you edited it, so now it's locked.

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