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Author
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Topic: Discussion: skipping readings
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ikja
Knowflake Posts: 2116
From: The Valley of Restoration
Registered: Oct 2014
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posted December 13, 2015 03:58 PM
  
Generally speaking, I've got NO issue with people refusing to do readings for particularly reasons, but I do think that readers should make it CLEAR who they have chosen to skip in a particular thread, as opposed to leaving a blanket statement in their opening post. I think that this way of doing things has the potential to be abused and that is unfair to the person asking for the reading. As they don't know their post will be skipped until the end or until they have asked the reader directly themselves. Agreed - Readers are not obliged to give everyone free readings as they have limited energy, but I definitely think respect on the forums is a two way street and at present I'm not sure how successfully this is working. That's why I think it would be more respectful for readers to talk to querents directly. What are your thoughts? IP: Logged |
Astro keen
Knowflake Posts: 3937
From: UK
Registered: Nov 2012
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posted December 13, 2015 04:38 PM
Ikja,If the reader has made it clear at the start that some readings might be skipped, perhaps because they can't connect, then anyone asking is aware of the risk of being missed out. I know some readers will skip the person who they think has been asking for many readings, and it would be unnecessarily stressful for the reader to point that out directly. However, it is helpful and polite for the reader to state their intentions clearly in the first post. IP: Logged |
ikja
Knowflake Posts: 2116
From: The Valley of Restoration
Registered: Oct 2014
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posted December 13, 2015 05:11 PM
Thanks for your response Astro Keen, I appreciate it!That's thing though, I think that if a reader can back up what they are saying about having too many readings, that's fair enough - especially if in a short space of time e.g. 'I read for you yesterday, etc.' I think that's perfectly acceptable, I agree with you. What else can you say to that? Lol I think the issue is when 'connectivity' is potentially used a "cover up" for something else. In that respect, it might always be the case that someone is skipped in a thread by a particular reader and they will never even know what the real reason is. Or, maybe it is the case that they will eventually get the hint? I'm not sure. I just think there's a danger for a blanket statement to be abused and hidden behind. That's why I am leaning more towards the use of direct statements. That way, no one has to ask if they have been skipped and it's more likely that they won't approach the reader again next time. IP: Logged |
erickaf
Knowflake Posts: 1250
From: Europe
Registered: Oct 2014
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posted December 14, 2015 05:48 AM
I have been skipped before but the reader did say in the original statement that she may skip those she can't connect and no one should take it personal.
If someone skipped me and gave me no reason I won't take it to heart. Reading is hard, very draining. I think readers that skip those with no explanation is a bit rude, I agree.
I guess about the connection issue, I guess you will just never know the real reason. Maybe the reader finds the sitter annoying or whatever. It's up to the reader I guess. But when I read there have been a few times where I genuinely can't connect, no matter how hard I try! And I don't know why.
I have seen people here ask the same question over and over. I had a sitter who I read for not too long ago and my reading for her didn't resonate then she had the nerve to say 'all other readings I had on this subject said this and this...' This is why it's smart for readers to state they won't read for those who they can't connect or haven't had a reading in X weeks/months!IP: Logged |
Astro keen
Knowflake Posts: 3937
From: UK
Registered: Nov 2012
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posted December 14, 2015 06:34 AM
Yes, I agree. Using the connectivity excuse, whether genuine or not, is a good way to avoid confrontations and rudeness. Maybe the readers can add a short message, e.g, 'sorry, couldn't connect', to be polite. But as Erickaf said, it's nothing major. There is a lot more rudeness here on other matters. Someone told me off once when I did not exchange within 24 hrs - no consideration was given for what may have been going on in my life. In this instance, my mother passed away. When I tried to explain, the person still maintained their position. Wow!IP: Logged |
ikja
Knowflake Posts: 2116
From: The Valley of Restoration
Registered: Oct 2014
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posted December 14, 2015 07:11 AM
Thanks for your contributions guys!Really appreciate them. It's good to have the opposite side presented. I've had a people say no to a question that I've asked before, that wasn't an issue. I just said 'thanks for considering me anyway' because they sent me a personalised response and it seemed genuine. Maybe I've just got something about the blanket statement in initial posts - personal pet peeve perhaps lol. I just think it's rude and abit inconsiderate. Everyone deserves to be acknowledged. I understand that it is a way to avoid confrontation; but at least now I know (if that's the norm as opposed to the exception) to completely avoid threads that are set up with a blanket statement at the beginning. IP: Logged |
Enneline
Knowflake Posts: 4058
From:
Registered: Nov 2012
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posted December 15, 2015 04:32 AM
ikja, i do understand your Point. i do always mention in the opening thread that i could skip some. i skip if i can't connect for some reason or another. and for my part it is just draining and nervwracking to justify why i don't read and why i do. Also, I am of the opinion that i do not need to justify my decisions. Some are quite doggedly, Keep bumping and want to ask another q or think they have the right to get a reading or start whining and i don't like that energy. mabye i am too strict and not nice enough to do free readings for everyone but i can live with being a not too nice Person. But yeah, you are right that everyone needs to be respectful and polite. And so i will leave a note in my opening thread that i probably won't be able to connect to every single questioner. and yes, maybe some use this method to cover other reasons like not liking the questioner or being of the opinion that the questioner is addicted to readings but as mentioned before i don't want to waste my energy with discussions (apart from that I don't think i have the right to teach anyone). IP: Logged |
Lindaland
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