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Author Topic:   Why am I always surrounded by people who don't understand me?
NYCdodger
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posted March 17, 2016 11:05 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for NYCdodger     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Always wanted to ask this and get a tarot reading on it.

But why is it that throughout my entire life i had to constantly and repeatedly deal with people (particularly males) who fail to understand or make false judgments about me?

People say its jealousy, but why? They also say that I think differently, or that I never make sense. But I don't understand that either.

I don't see whats so hard about taking the TIME to understand people. Im thankful for the FEW male friends that I have that do. But why is it throughout my life I've had to deal with individuals who were quick to judge and discriminate? Why do people do these things in the first place?

Thanks

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NYCdodger
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posted March 17, 2016 01:02 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for NYCdodger     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
bump? anyone

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Lerena
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posted March 17, 2016 01:05 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Lerena     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I am working on a reading for this question. It's a good one, but it's taking me a bit of time to interpret the cards I drew.

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Sikanda
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posted March 17, 2016 01:15 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Sikanda     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Non-astrologically I'd say it might be you who attract these people for some reason. You know maybe there's something you need to work on in order to attract the right kind of people. I believe amd I guarantee you that there will always be people who will understand you.

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NYCdodger
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posted March 17, 2016 01:22 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for NYCdodger     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Lerena:
I am working on a reading for this question. It's a good one, but it's taking me a bit of time to interpret the cards I drew.

Thanks

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NYCdodger
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posted March 17, 2016 01:24 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for NYCdodger     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Sikanda:
Non-astrologically I'd say it might be you who attract these people for some reason. You know maybe there's something you need to work on in order to attract the right kind of people. I believe amd I guarantee you that there will always be people who will understand you.

Well then what is it? Im a very genuine person and Im known for being one. And I stay to myself and to those few i have mentioned. The people that are in my life are the few that understand. But constantly I have/had to deal with those who don't.

At first i thought it was normal, but after many convos I'm seeing that there is more to it than meets the eye. So is it me, or is it them??

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Sikanda
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posted March 17, 2016 02:09 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Sikanda     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by NYCdodger:
Well then what is it? Im a very genuine person and Im known for being one. And I stay to myself and to those few i have mentioned. The people that are in my life are the few that understand. But constantly I have/had to deal with those who don't.

At first I thought it was normal, but after many convos I'm seeing that there is more to it than meets the eye. So is it me, or is it them??


Well I would tend to agree with you. It should be a bit of both parties, it doesn't have to be just you.

Maybe you would need to learn to not care that much though about people who after all are not a significant part of your life. There will always be people who don't get you, so you should rather accept them and tolerate them if necessary -or distance yourself from them, depending on the situation.

Also I don't know if you are reflective/introspective, but if you are, you might be easily mistaken for who you are not. People might sometimes project their own way of thinking onto you.

Anyways, you said -and you are right-, that they should actually take the time to understand you. But could it be that you need to spend some time too trying to understand them, where they come from?

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NYCdodger
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posted March 17, 2016 02:19 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for NYCdodger     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Im always willing to understand them. Which is why in my original post i said i don't understand why its so hard for people to not understand others in the first place. Understanding others is possibly one of the EASIEST things you can ever do.

All it takes is the right intent.

But people would rather compare and discriminate. Thats not in my nature. If I'm uncomfortable around you I would say so, but that doesn't mean I'm going to talk down on your character, or claim you as something that you're not.

I've had people who don't know who i am, or my history speak about me and treat me as if i owed them something, or as if I've done something wrong to them. WHY IS THAT? This has been a reoccurring theme in my life. Its either they are strongly attracted to me, or repulsed. And with no reason surrounding it.

This is why I'm hoping someone can do a tarot reading for me.

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ikja
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posted March 17, 2016 02:47 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for ikja     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I think a chart analysis would be useful here.

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NYCdodger
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posted March 17, 2016 02:52 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for NYCdodger     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
^^^ I know. But I'm interested in tarot for this one

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Sikanda
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posted March 17, 2016 03:13 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Sikanda     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by NYCdodger:
Im always willing to understand them. Which is why in my original post i said i don't understand why its so hard for people to not understand others in the first place. Understanding others is possibly one of the EASIEST things you can ever do.

All it takes is the right intent.

But people would rather compare and discriminate. Thats not in my nature. If I'm uncomfortable around you I would say so, but that doesn't mean I'm going to talk down on your character, or claim you as something that you're not.

I've had people who don't know who i am, or my history speak about me and treat me as if i owed them something, or as if I've done something wrong to them. WHY IS THAT? This has been a reoccurring theme in my life. Its either they are strongly attracted to me, or repulsed. And with no reason surrounding it.

This is why I'm hoping someone can do a tarot reading for me.


Aww NYCdodger it's true. I so agree with you that understanding others is easy and we should all do it. Life would be so much more beautiful like that.
But I think people just don't want to do that simply because they are mean like that? Or you simply don't click? Or they are less mature? There are so many possibilites they can be like that.

Still don't worry dodger, I can do a tarot reading if you want. Just give me a moment and I'll be back with it.

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Lerena
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posted March 17, 2016 03:51 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Lerena     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Okay, the court cards I drew tell me that you can handle another person's opinion. So, I'll use my blunt voice, because I know you're mature enough to hear it. My interpretation of these cards is a mixture of intuition, from-the-book meanings, and my own personal experience with your situation.

I don't consider myself as good at reading tarot cards as others on here. As such, please let me know if I get anything correct.

The Fool.
This card could mean a few things. My gut says they don't know how to talk to you so they risk looking stupid by discriminating against you and just overall being complete idiots. My brain, on the other hand, says that it's more likely they aren't living like the Fool. Their lives must be quite boring. I mean, they try to entertain themselves by focusing on other people. Clearly, they must be bored with being alive. They need to start using their heads and actually experiment with what makes them happy. Also, they could be insecure and uncomfortable with themselves.

Queen of Swords.
You are open-minded, understanding, objective, and realistic. Some people prefer their close-minded fantasies and don't want to step outside thir comfort zone to communicate with someone that has a different point of view than them. They probably fear reality and cling to a fantasy in order to protect their weak egos.

King of Swords.
You're upfront, honest, logical, and intelligent. You aren't burning with passion and your words can occasionally be painful to hear, but they are words that speak the truth. Some people can't handle this kind of person. They'd rather be told pleasant lies even when they ask for someone's opinion.

Ace of Swords.
There are two sides to every story. You know the true story in most situations, because you are mentally clear. You know who you are and who you're not. You're aware of your own personal truths. I get a sense that the people surrounding you aren't as honest as you are. Perhaps you know some honest people, but the majority are stuck in a rut of bias that they can't seem to escape since it's where they're comfortable. Unfortunately, even if you put in time and effort to understand the other person, that doesn't mean they care enough to do the same with you. And more importantly, not everyone is worth it. If they won't understand you, just don't bother with them. If a family member is one of those people, try to limit your interaction with him/her.

Five of Pentacles.
They lack something you have. If I had to guess, they judge and discriminate because they don't have the ability to understand certain people. Perhaps they just don't care enough about anyone that exists outside their narrow vision of reality and this prevents them from putting in the effort to gain more understanding of those people. Simply put, I'd say they lack the right maturity and development. Their brains are stuck at 12-years old while their bodies may be older. Since they can't free themselves from the limits of their own minds, they decide to bring you down with them using judgment and discrimination. Judging by the surrounding cards, it doesn't look like it's working, but I'm sure you're getting fed up with it anyway.

Five of Cups.
There may be something to gain from the situation. For example, there are aspects of my identity that people judge. A lot. In fact, most parts of my identity get hated on a good portion of the time, but at the same time, not everyone hates on who I am. Not everyone is going to judge me or criticize me or attempt to make me feel awful. There are people that understand me and I'm sure what I'm saying is true for you as well. You can't please everyone, but you can learn something. In this situation, it's probably better to find a way to stop caring that others judge you in the way that they do. Easier said than done though. This card, at its core, is about not focusing on the right things in life. You can't change other people. Over time, however, you might find more people that understand you and maybe even learn to find amusement in the situation if you focus on what really matters. These people that judge you don't matter. Their words are hollow and if they aren't judging you accurately, why do you care about them doing it? The problem lies with them, but you can choose to handle the situation in a better way.

Queen of Pentacles.
You are reliable, capable, genuine, and trustworthy. You are a 'what you see is what you get' kind of person and sadly not everyone is mature enough to handle that. Some people like to discriminate against good people, because they know they won't get hurt. Others like to discriminate because being so open to others makes you 'vulnerable' in their opinion. This isn't always true, but if you share who you are with everyone, the result will not always be pleasant. it's a risk you have to take. Some people will understand, but the grand majority will not.

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NYCdodger
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posted March 17, 2016 04:15 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for NYCdodger     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Sikanda:
Aww NYCdodger it's true. I so agree with you that understanding others is easy and we should all do it. Life would be so much more beautiful like that.
But I think people just don't want to do that simply because they are mean like that? Or you simply don't click? Or they are less mature? There are so many possibilites they can be like that.

Still don't worry dodger, I can do a tarot reading if you want. Just give me a moment and I'll be back with it.


ok thanks

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NYCdodger
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posted March 17, 2016 05:19 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for NYCdodger     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
@Lerena

Thank you for this reading. I really appreciate the time, effort, and dedication you've put into this for me. I didn't expect it and i am truly thankful for it!

The cards were very on point to my situation(s) and i guess i have to learn from what I've read.

There are DEEPER issues at hand, and sometimes i go through these weird guilt trips. Idk why i do, But i just do

Thank you again. If you would like an exchange I'm up for it

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Lerena
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posted March 17, 2016 05:27 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Lerena     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by NYCdodger:
Thank you again. If you would like an exchange I'm up for it

Sure. I'd love to exchange.

My question is...
What is keeping me from thinking my current relationship will last when I have no reason to think that?

I'm mainly wondering if it's just silly insecurities or if there's a legitimate reason to doubt the relationship's lasting potential.

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Sikanda
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posted March 17, 2016 05:55 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Sikanda     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I asked how people interact with you

Lovers - 9 of swords - 8 of swords

Ok I think you are very attractive and likeable to them. But at the same time I see the connection kind of distressing connection. It's like they appreciate you a lot but maybe they don't feel loved back as much -even when they are!? Maybe they have to make a choice to either listen to their mind or to their hearts and this back and forth could be kind of exhausting to them. It's like they feel they have to do a lot of work to get to you.
But still 8 of pentacles shows they feel it is worthwhile to make a relationship possible with you.

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NYCdodger
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posted March 17, 2016 06:21 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for NYCdodger     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Lerena:
Sure. I'd love to exchange.

My question is...
What is keeping me from thinking my current relationship will last when I have no reason to think that?

I'm mainly wondering if it's just silly insecurities or if there's a legitimate reason to doubt the relationship's lasting potential.


8 of swords
Queen of Pents
The Moon

I asked a one card tarot and got Page of Pents

Your relationship is fine. 8 of swords and the Moon is showing your insecurities, but its all an illusion. Don't trap yourself in these thoughts

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NYCdodger
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posted March 17, 2016 06:25 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for NYCdodger     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Sikanda:
I asked how people interact with you

Lovers - 9 of swords - 8 of swords

Ok I think you are very attractive and likeable to them. But at the same time I see the connection kind of distressing connection. It's like they appreciate you a lot but maybe they don't feel loved back as much -even when they are!? Maybe they have to make a choice to either listen to their mind or to their hearts and this back and forth could be kind of exhausting to them. It's like they feel they have to do a lot of work to get to you.
But still 8 of pentacles shows they feel it is worthwhile to make a relationship possible with you.


Hmmm this is one of the issues i face. Sometimes i feel like they want me to show "more" gratitude towards them. Or they expect me to be excited when they are. But the truth is i have my own way of showing love and gratitude. Im not a "showy" person, and even when i try to show I'm thankful they take it the wrong way. Its weird.

My sister is an example of this. She always feels like i don't care about her when i do. I'm just a very aloof individual and i express myself different.

See the contradiction now? lol

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Sikanda
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posted March 17, 2016 07:43 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Sikanda     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Yes, I can see it. I would say they expect you to be more lively maybe, because some people need to see where you stand if you want to interact on a deeper level, I think it's only normal.

In my case I've been the one who openly showed my care and affection, and who thought the other one didn't respond to it -and I guess he did, but he was never demonstrative so I can't tell to which extent he liked me at all! And when you give a damn about a person that is SO frustrating . To the point of crying really.
So I decided to surround myself with people who could clearly show me where they were coming from, who were in tune with my emotions since I didn't want more disappointments. :/

I believe you shouldn't feel guilty about who you are. There are people who will appreciate you for being you, even if others who would like to can't .
Continue to be true to yourself and never change forced by what other people think because there are those who will always admire and love you.

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NYCdodger
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posted March 17, 2016 07:57 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for NYCdodger     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Thank you for your kind words. And thank you for your reading!

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