posted August 19, 2016 11:20 AM            

(tl;dr: I’ve been having bad luck in the romance department; do you see that changing sometime in the future? Will post charts, thanks for your help!)

Hello, all!

It's been a while since I've written anything on this forum, but I thought that I'd give it a go, since I have been feeling somewhat down lately. Times when I have written on this forum in the past, I received a lot of help and clarity, so thank you in advance to anyone who responds to this!

In sum, I've excelled in multiple areas of my life, due to hard work, perseverance, and luck, all except in the area of romance and relationships!

From a young age, I've always believed in (and have also been taught) the value of hard work ethic. So, it was quite common to see me with my nose stuck in a book, or happily studying. Even though I was a socially awkward (i.e.: really silent and extremely observant) as a young girl and teenager, I learned how to develop my social skills and reach out to people, and be a rather sympathetic listener and good friend (as many have told me - their words, not mine!).

As a now 25 year-old woman, making solid friendships and actively pursuing my career goals are on the top of my list, so to speak.

I always thought that I would meet a good guy one day and that things would go from there. Hell, I even thought that I would at least have a serious encounter with a guy! I was fine with the fact that nothing ever happened in high school because I was so engrossed in my studies and was still stiff around many people. I was somewhat okay with the fact that nothing ever happened in college because I gravitated towards guys who were emotionally unavailable, perhaps subconsciously to make sure that I didn't get emotionally hurt. But, as the years continue to roll on, and as my 26th birthday nears (in early Oct.), it's becoming more difficult NOT to think that something is wrong.

Many people have stated how beautiful they think I am, or how I must be a model (or constantly insist that I should become one), or how I must have to swat the guys away because I’m “absolutely breathtaking.” Again, I'm only saying this to give you a better picture, not for an ego boost. (In fact, I shy away from compliments because I get so nervous!) I take great care of myself, I'm sociable in a warm and engaging, yet calm and collected kind of way (Gemini-Cancer cusp Asc., Libra Sun and Venus in the 4th house), and I try to live my life in a honest, positive way.

Honestly, I am grateful for the compliments and for the good fortune that have come my way in other areas of my life, but this off-kilter romantic department is becoming frustrating. It seems like the guys, many of whom are much older, who DO ask me out have some serious hang-ups (some have been real shady types and don't want to change themselves!), have ulterior motives, or we just aren't compatible enough for something to stick. I only seek out the essentials to compatibility, and looks come after that, but even this doesn't work. When it comes to guys my age, I think it's even worse. I have even tried to take initiative in my own small, respectful way, only to have disastrous outcomes that are laughably embarrassing.

I have gotten all the positive social cues from a guy (who was an acquaintance or even friend, not a total stranger) that he was really attracted and interested, even confirmation from his friends (so it’s not like my imagination was making up some fairy tale story), only for the guy I was interested in to do a 180 – after I 1) smiled and asked him if he liked me, 2) said I was interested in him, or 3) sent a text during the day asking to hang out – and he would act like I was too interested. I was so reserved and laidback during these one-time attempts, but you’d think that I’d done MUCH more than the girls who almost literally threw themselves at said guys right after I tried. And these guys accepted the other girls’ advances. This scenario has happened so often that I just stopped trying.

I know that everything happens for a reason, and you attract what you think you deserve, so… I don’t know. I know that I can still improve so many areas of my life, and that introspection and true, unshakeable self-confidence is something that everyone should work towards, but I’m wondering why nothing has changed in the romantic department, or if anything ever will. Again, I am grateful to even be breathing, to have a roof over my head, and to be alive! I would just like to add a positive, real relationship into the mix, if I’m fortunate enough.

I’m sorry for being so dramatic about all of this; I would just really appreciate some astrological help with this one! Do you see anything changing for me in the romantic department in the future? I’m attaching some charts – natal, Progressed Chart, 2016 Solar Return, 2016 Venus Return. And I’m sorry that I’m most likely bombarding you; I’ve been trying read these things on my own, but I think I need some guidance.

Thanks again to anyone who reads this, really!

Love and light

posted August 19, 2016 04:38 PM            

With your Moon sq. Saturn, Venus sq. Uranus and Sun sq. Neptune almost exact in some aspects, you probably don't perceive yourself as clearly as you think, or in reverse, others don't clearly see you the way they think and therefore once they 'clear' their image, they do a full reverse. Again, that's not to mean there's anything wrong with you but that they had their own image of who they 'thought' you were. Moon sq. Saturn can sometimes come across as unemotional, and with Mercury in Virgo, I would assume the same. With Venus sq. Uranus, you may seem a bit too eccentric/freedom loving which may worry some people about your loyalty to stick around the long term.

Other than that, you have a nice Yod between Mars, Jupiter and Neptune and that usually means you're fairly driven and have a good sense of your own purpose in life. My personal opinion is to try and relax as your many 'square' aspects work themselves out, usually requiring a full Saturn return. By the time you hit 30, you'll see yourself in an entirely new light and be even better able to see the type of partner you really need as opposed to settling for someone that doesn't quite fit. I like your chart, it gives me an old soul vibe.

posted August 20, 2016 12:34 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by SDragon:
As mentioned in Soul Unions, Saturn in the 7th would postpone relationship matters as I have the same thing and I've only been in one real serious relationship and I'm approaching 37, so I got 11 years on you! :=D

With your Moon sq. Saturn, Venus sq. Uranus and Sun sq. Neptune almost exact in some aspects, you probably don't perceive yourself as clearly as you think, or in reverse, others don't clearly see you the way they think and therefore once they 'clear' their image, they do a full reverse. Again, that's not to mean there's anything wrong with you but that they had their own image of who they 'thought' you were. Moon sq. Saturn can sometimes come across as unemotional, and with Mercury in Virgo, I would assume the same. With Venus sq. Uranus, you may seem a bit too eccentric/freedom loving which may worry some people about your loyalty to stick around the long term.

Other than that, you have a nice Yod between Mars, Jupiter and Neptune and that usually means you're fairly driven and have a good sense of your own purpose in life. My personal opinion is to try and relax as your many 'square' aspects work themselves out, usually requiring a full Saturn return. By the time you hit 30, you'll see yourself in an entirely new light and be even better able to see the type of partner you really need as opposed to settling for someone that doesn't quite fit. I like your chart, it gives me an old soul vibe.

Best of luck!

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SDragon,

First off, thank you so much with your kind and sympathetic response! It means a lot that you took the time to read all that I had to write (and I know I can write up a storm sometimes).

Yes, 7th house Saturn has been quite difficult, but I have to admit that being forced to learn the lessons on the sidelines has been a blessing in disguise. Hard as it may be, it's best to view it this way, even on tougher days. How do you deal with the delays provided by 7th house Saturn, delays which either manifest themselves through personal choice, outside influences, or a combination of both (if you don't mind my asking)? You seem to be really grounded and self-assured, which is something that I hope to achieve and revel in for longer periods of time.

As for the 7th house Neptune/Uranus/Saturn to Moon/Venus issues, yes, these have definitely played out. I have different parts of myself that I have subconsciously revealed to others at different times, and a few experiences have shown me that I am often typecasted, or that I can inadvertently typecast myself, only for the people around me to seriously overreact when I show that I have other sides to myself besides my quiet, caring nature (and nothing over-the-top, just silly personality quirks, or, you know, having feelings, or standing up for myself when it's justified). I am somewhat restless, though, that is so true! It took me some time to realize that I move around so much, since I'm almost always going into introspective mode. I do communicate this to friends and acquaintances, old and especially new.

I think what I struggle with most is the overreaction that I have often gotten after revealing more sides of myself, or really after showing interest. Guys I have been interested in have overreacted in such odd ways that it made me think that I was doing something horribly offensive or insulting, even to myself. Yet, when I look back, and ask wise friends, family, and grounded people about it, they tell me that I didn't do anything over-the-top, at all.

The funny this is that most of these guys later felt awful about overreacting, but most were too ashamed to admit it (either their friends hinted it to me in rather obvious ways, or their moping around whenever I was near and the attempts to get our acquaintanceship/friendship to the state it was in before the blowup - and without addressing the obvious issue - said it all). Things would often get foggy from there. I agree with you about the Neptunian side of things.

I'll try my best to be patient and wait for more things to be revealed to me; perhaps something that I do is too confusing or I seem more laid-back and emotionless than I really am, which is (surprisingly) startling to a number of people; perhaps I have been attracted to guys who embody this unstable, flighty (Uranian) and unclear (Neptunian) personality that I have within myself; perhaps I just need to stop thinking that something is wrong and just take everything as it is.

Finally, thanks for the compliment. I get this a lot, and I find comfort in many other people who also seem like old souls (not to exclude anyone, though!). I like the feeling as well, although sometimes I can get a little too existential or sentimental at times, haha.

All in all, thanks so much.

Love and light,

posted August 20, 2016 07:55 AM            

When I see multiple outer planetary planets bringing their archetypal energies onto personal planets in complex configurations I can usually detect the complexity of the personality and that's what gives the old soul vibe. We tend to be very complex and contradictory in our behavior because at the end of the day we kind of know that we're just playing a 'part' that's not really 'us'. I do think that you will attract Uranian/Neptunian personality types until you learn more about your own subconscious projections but again I wouldn't worry too much about it as every experience will help you figure out the type of jigsaw puzzle that you are. Only after we truly can see the shape, texture, curvature and size of our own jigsaw puzzle, can we determine which other puzzle piece fits with us.

I'll try to think more about your yod configuration but right now I'm not really getting anything - it's very fuzzy

Let us know how things go after your Saturn Return.

posted August 21, 2016 06:35 PM            

No one will be able to give you an accurate reading using the natal chart posted here (or any others calculated with it as radix), as it is quite considerably inaccurate. Given the unusual nature of that statement, you are free to inquire more personally with no obligation through my website linked below.

In spite of that, everyone can change any patterns of relationships that have been disappointing, as I went through many years of loneliness, changed the pattern and am now happily married. There is a mate for everyone that wants one, it is just a matter of timing and being emotionally healthy/ready.