posted July 12, 2017 09:40 PM            

BESIDES and ignoring ANY and all transits, Journey....

What makes you think your marriage is dissolving?
Are you getting 'clues' from him that something is going on with your marriage?

Never EVER allow astrology to come and divide your personal marriage, JourneysRoar!!

That's not the right use of astrology...

Gently, what has you specifically afraid right now, about the marriage?
Is there anything?.....
Is there something that you and he need to talk about?
Is something worrying him?
It might not be about your relationship??

Maybe you'll have some UPWARD evolving transforming experiences???

When my roommate was having Pluto conjunct his Chiron in H7... he gained a Helper and a Companion who helped guide him through some gnarly gnarly ordeals. That Pluto brought him a Blessing IN his life!! It raised him UP. It gave him a solid helpmeet.

Pluto isn't stereotype badness automatically knocking over your castle you've already built.

If the marriage is sound... then nothing can affect its core.
Whatever befalls from the 'outside' will meet a healthy Bond, and Strengthen it.

Having a partner, and children, can SAVE you, and take you up to another level.

Life might ruffle the feathers in your nest, but the 'place-holder' in the Heart called HOME will still stand.

posted July 12, 2017 09:42 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by JourneysRoar:
I need photobucket for dummies, I can't get the image to work.

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I don't know if this applies to you?
Check this out.... (re photobucket recent changes)

posted July 12, 2017 10:28 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by mirage29:
I don't know if this applies to you?
Check this out.... (re photobucket recent changes)

LLC2.0 Lexxi post http://www.linda-goodman.com/ubb/Forum25/HTML/005467.html

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posted July 12, 2017 11:53 PM            

WITH your husband....
Do you have a church you attend? Some kind of faith-people? Are there any supports for wives, or, sometimes churches are 'all' about the man, and the woman remains as second-class citizen, and is 'blamed' for problems... (Been there too-- that's why I'm bringing that up. It's rare you are SAHM, except can be prevalent in faith-based communities?
Utilize the pastors... that they could talk to him. See if they can find out what's bothering?
He's Sexting-- Really????. Really???. *jawdrop* (sorry)

Okay.. What I said is NOT based on astrology.

I'm seeing your Cancer Stellium! wow. You ARE a mom!!! LOL.

I applaud you for taking college courses too.
What are you studying? Why. (NN 9th)

Is there anyone that could help you with your housework, etc, that you could draft from someone from a Women's type group among your associates? The Sodality? Whatever they call themselves?

So. ... I'm just being "practical" here.

Do you think he would be willing to do some marital counseling?

Some of what's going on with him could be related to those 'mid-life' crises?

I see that you acknowledged the SR links I left you in Astro2.0. I've not really read those.

posted July 13, 2017 12:07 AM            

Plus, I think some of the forecasters are saying there are skytransits that will feel more 'hostile' and people more irritated at 'little' things. Even doing impulsive things. This weekend's tMars square tUranus engaging your Stellium.

Watch out for ego-based competitions. Bursts.
Let his goads 'go' by if you can (if appropriate to you)... if you don't want that sudden-break-off.
You already know how to 'do' Sun-Mars Cancer energy because of your natal.
Ceres is coming for her 'return' in your chart too-- Sometimes Ceres brings care. Sometimes Ceres can be like the scythe, a reaper cutting down wheat. Cutting things out that were hanging like on slim threads.

If your relationship is valuable to you, if you're still "basically good" with each other, then maybe the problems can rise to the surface to be handled. Lowering stress. Taking your relationship up to a NEW level. ...

With all the 'work' you do, it would be nice to really feel like your partner is for you.

I HOPE you get time off to yourselves, to know and renew who you are 'as a couple'. Ten years from now, after midlife transits, things can be much sweeter (hoping).
(I support marriages, and committed couples.)

Besides your Ceres return, and Sun-Mars DW, the New Moon Leo will be conjunct your own Moon Leo.

You're probably going to get really 'energized'... it's up to you how you handle it. Funnel or Transmute? ...
If you look like a break to occur?, say that you need to think a little longer (past the square). (Not saying that it's going to happen-- just that lots of 'tension' will be in the air. When you know it, you have the edge on using it how you want.)

You're a mom. FIVE KIDS! You are a rock.
You'll get through everything....

posted July 13, 2017 12:52 AM            

Could your husband actually be feeling kind of insecure and threatened by your taking those study courses?

Could HE be suspicious that your educating yourself means you'd be taking steps towards economic self-sufficiency 'in order to' leave him?

posted July 13, 2017 02:05 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by mirage29:
Your Sun-Mars Cancer are having their return now. Wow!! double-whammy.

Plus, I think some of the forecasters are saying there are skytransits that will feel more 'hostile' and people more irritated at 'little' things. Even doing impulsive things. This weekend's tMars square tUranus engaging your Stellium.

Watch out for ego-based competitions. Bursts.
Let his goads 'go' by if you can (if appropriate to you)... if you don't want that sudden-break-off.
You already know how to 'do' Sun-Mars Cancer energy because of your natal.
Ceres is coming for her 'return' in your chart too-- Sometimes Ceres brings care. Sometimes Ceres can be like the scythe, a reaper cutting down wheat. Cutting things out that were hanging like on slim threads.

If your relationship is valuable to you, if you're still "basically good" with each other, then maybe the problems can rise to the surface to be handled. Lowering stress. Taking your relationship up to a NEW level. ...

With all the 'work' you do, it would be nice to really feel like your partner is for you.

I HOPE you get time off to yourselves, to know and renew who you are 'as a couple'. Ten years from now, after midlife transits, things can be much sweeter (hoping).
(I support marriages, and committed couples.)

Besides your Ceres return, and Sun-Mars DW, the New Moon Leo will be conjunct your own Moon Leo.

You're probably going to get really 'energized'... it's up to you how you handle it. Funnel or Transmute? ...
If you look like a break to occur?, say that you need to think a little longer (past the square). (Not saying that it's going to happen-- just that lots of 'tension' will be in the air. When you know it, you have the edge on using it how you want.)

You're a mom. FIVE KIDS! You are a rock.
You'll get through everything....

Glad you're here.

---

Gosh, Uranus has been dancing his sqaure all over my sun/mars! It's been hectic and he keeps screaming freedom in my ear, but my natal trine to Saturn I think won't let me quit until I know there is nothing left to save. I can't explain it, one minute I'm telling myself I've had enough, and the next I'm justifying why I can make this work.

Admittedly, I am a better mom than I am a wife. I realize I need to learn how to balance both better, but I'm sometimes overstimulated, if you know what I mean. I'm touched out and talked out by the end of the day, I just want to sink into silence. Maybe Ceres will be that renewal I need, the kids are all becoming school aged and I will have more time to focus on being a better wife, trying to meet his needs more than I can now. He makes snide comments sometimes about how he could handle everything I do with ease...and he's probably right, lol. He can run circles around me with his sag mars! His energy is always up, he can go all day and still be barely able to finally sit down before 10 pm. He wants me to meet that energy level and I just don't have it in me anymore, I feel exhausted everyday!

posted July 13, 2017 11:03 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by mirage29:
I'm sooo sorry that's happening.
That moment after you responded to his goading you? I understand moments like that. Those are wound-marks. Things or words that are hard take back, and CAN get better over time.... or, during a 'right' moment for you and him. If you have family or good friends, have them watch the kids.
We have family although no friends really, but because we have 5 kids (2 are rather self sufficient, they are 15 and 12) everyone really tends to avoid offering help...or they have many reasons they can't if I ask, or they will only keep them for like an hour before they are calling and telling me "so and so wants their mom".

Let your family and friends you trust KNOW what's going on with you eventually.... You might need to rely on their help and support in the future (only "practically speaking" to you, as a woman who has 'personally' been there, with similar circumstances...... It's just not "fair" for the SAHM. Again, sooo sorry this is happening.
Would your family be solidly behind you as a safety net, should you and your children need assistance?

Some of my family would, but my mom wouldn't be supportive of a separation. It's my job to make my husband happy, if he's not...I'm doing something wrong....or I'm not doing enough. If I vent to her, which she is all I really have, she usually tells me to suck it up bc "he didn't HAVE to step up to the plate...he has chosen to be a father and husband". I get that too he could've very well left me to fend for them on my own, but I didn't just get myself pregnant at 16...he played a pretty central role in that too. Why is it only my job to compromise? Why do I always have to be the good supportive wife and give him his way ALL the time? It's like if I try to assert myself or my opinion, I'm challenging him...so I just don't bc I don't have the energy to see the battle all the way through, and he has LOADS of it...that man can go for hours if I entertained it. I think this is his SN/Mars conjunction in sag at work, he is rarely faced with a lack of energy for confrontation

WITH your husband....
Do you have a church you attend? Some kind of faith-people? Are there any supports for wives, or, sometimes churches are 'all' about the man, and the woman remains as second-class citizen, and is 'blamed' for problems... (Been there too-- that's why I'm bringing that up. It's rare you are SAHM, except can be prevalent in faith-based communities?
Utilize the pastors... that they could talk to him. See if they can find out what's bothering?

He is quite prideful, to a fault, he'll never talk to an outsider about our conflicts. The few times he overheard me talking to my mom about some things, he became so aggravated with me...like I betrayed him. It is very hard to get him to take other perspectives, and when he does...it is after I have literally SHOUTED my issue and refused to allow him to make an exuse or shush me by speaking over me. I feel like sh*t afterwards, because then he usually starts saying how he is the whole problem and the world would be better without him...so I back peddle, I apologize profusely and try to change the message I was intending to convey...and again, this leads me to just keep my hangups to myself, to avoid the fallout. I became a SAHM mom when our youngest 3 were born, I couldn't justify working for $.80 an hr after I paid for child care. It has caused quit the financial burden, and I am reminded of that often. I have 2 unpaid driving tickets from almost 6 years ago, he keeps saying we'll get them paid, but it never happens. But, he then throws it in my face that he HAS to do everything driving related, from doctor visits to shopping, and that he's only one person. I feel damned if I do and damned if I don't, I don't know what to do most days...I'm limited to taking care of the kids and the house. I can't risk being pulled over for driving on a suspended license with my kids in the car!!

He's Sexting-- Really????. Really???. *jawdrop* (sorry)
I have a hard time letting this one go, I felt truly violated and so undervalued. A part of me felt hurt and enraged all at the same time! What if he did become sexually active with another female and she has a disease? He doesn't care enough about me to protect my health if at all possible?
It was the first time I truly felt like I meant nothing to him anymore. When I confronted him about it, he referred me back to the day I agreed that maybe this wasn't working, said that he doesn't feel like I love him anymore. He likes to flip his issues back to me, or a previous reaction to his action. If I try to help him understand why I reacted a certain way, he plays a pity party on me and makes me feel bad...and I don't k ow if he consciously does this or if it's a mechanism of protection for him.

Okay.. What I said is NOT based on astrology.

I'm seeing your Cancer Stellium! wow. You ARE a mom!!! LOL.

I am, first and foremost. I take my role very seriously and that may play a role in our troubles as a couple sometimes. I know how to be a great mom, I'm good at setting boundries and reading their expressions. I know how to react to their needs, while acknowledging a healthy balance of wants. I have this intuition with them, I KNOW when something is not right, and I know the remedy (I don't know how I know it, my mom was a great friend and a horrible mom, lol...I didn't have the best role models growing up myself. My primary caregiver was my dad until he passed away suddenly when I was 7, in an aitomobile accident...my mom wasn't in my life much before then). Being a mom is my comfort zone, but also a breeding ground for anxiety...mostly I get anxiety about irrational "what ifs", probably a residual insecurity from losing my dad.

I applaud you for taking college courses too.
What are you studying? Why. (NN 9th)

At the time, I was so confused about what I wanted to do with my life...I was just going for a degree in psychology, but getting my core classes out of the way first. Now I'm not sure what I truly want to do, I've not had much time to focus on who I am to truly know what I am called to do. I want to help people, I just don't know in what way I would be helpful.

Is there anyone that could help you with your housework, etc, that you could draft from someone from a Women's type group among your associates? The Sodality? Whatever they call themselves?

So. ... I'm just being "practical" here.

Do you think he would be willing to do some marital counseling?

Some of what's going on with him could be related to those 'mid-life' crises? He's only 32, and overwhelmed. He expressed how stressed he is, but he won't help me do the necessary things that will take the load off. I have a cell phone, but it's not in service...hasn't been for almost two years. Last week he yelled at me that my cousin has a direct way to contact me, but he doesn't. Well, my cousin messages me on facebook and my husband doesn't have a facebook. I told him if he really wanted to be able to talk to me throught the day, he could very well pay my phone service so I CAN reach him! He complains that the school has to call him if one of the kids needs something, that HE has to leave work to do it...but I can't do anything about that. Pay my phone service and help me pay for my drivers license again...problem solved!! We also srruggle with finances...he doesn't feel the need to keep me informed on what we have and what has been paid. If I mention something is past due, he gets upset...says "I know, you think I don't know?", but never pays it until we're paying late charge after late charge. A part of him expects me to just know how much money we are working with, and another part of him doesn't feel like it's important for me to know. Money is always conplicated with him. I've never been like that with him. When he was out of work bc construction hit bottom, I worked. I never threw it in his face that I was making money and he wasn't, I always asked his imput on which bills should be paid and in what order....he doesn't do that with me. I feel like I am a damn kid around here most days, and it really ****** me off. I feel like my sun/mars manifests in negative ways bc I cannot express them in a healthy way. I get horrible migraines, I think part them stem from built up fruatration that i am afraid to release bc I don't have the energy to see it through with him...he is tenacious and I can't match that anymore...I'm tired!

I see that you acknowledged the SR links I left you in Astro2.0. I've not really read those. I'm still thumbing through them, lol. No moon to node explanations yet though :/

Be Blessed....

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posted July 13, 2017 11:25 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by mirage29:
Another idea.... from a different take.

Could your husband actually be feeling kind of insecure and threatened by your taking those study courses?
I feel like that's a possibility! He was a butt most days when I was in school. My mom would keep my youngest 3 while I attended 3 day classes, then I would leave school go pick the toddlers and baby up and head to my older boys school and pick them up. We'd do their homework, chores, and dinner, then I would have a class again at 6:30 to 8:30pm. But once I came through the door at night, I would regret everyday that I went to class...coming home to my husband ****** bc this kid did this and that kid wouldn't do that, and he would legit go to bed immediately after and tell me if wasn't in school the house would be calm at that time of night. I would immediately feel guilty, how could I expect a man to handle 5 kids on his own? I would justify his feelings to the point that I just gave up on any hopes of schooling and I lost my grants bc of it. What he doesn't realize is that I was trying to find a way to help him!! I know we can't live off of his imcome...we barely get by doing that now!! But I also know that I need a career, bc if I were to ever have to do this alone...I would fail my children and I will never have a penny to eventually retire on. I can't be his shadow forever, at some point I have to be somewhat self sufficient...it wouldn't be fair to me if something unexpected was to happen to him and I have no experience on a resume. If I was to unfortunately die tomorrow, he could do all of this on his income...he has been in the same trade for over 15 years. I don't have that security and it scares me!

Could HE be suspicious that your educating yourself means you'd be taking steps towards economic self-sufficiency 'in order to' leave him?

Please note too-- In the above posts, I still deal with the residuals of marriage that broke-up.
Shredded me.
So, sorry for any 'projections' into your situation.
5 Kids-- ... yeah, I'd say you probably have a pretty good head on your shoulders.

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posted July 13, 2017 12:44 PM            

It's easy to look from a long-term perspective. You two have been together in relationship for a LONG LONG time. You both obviously have ability to commit and be responsible people (also to be admired).

In a way, long distance way here... This is a glitch-time of sorts. But focusing down and INTO the finer moments and detailing, things stay 'separate' from each other and stick out and cause the glitchy things that get worked out in the crucible of relationships.

Sorry that you and your mom had that kind of past. I usually tend to say to stay in relationships and work things out, as your mom does too. (Of course, I'm looking at YOUR chart, and my synastry with you. We have a handful of zodiac sign connections, planets connecting in degrees, including aspects with asteroid goddesses.)

I understand (and admire) that as a teen, your husband manned-up and took responsibility-- long term.

I definitely relate with the daycare cost-factors. 80-cents? Yeah... That happened to me with my divorce in the 1980s. The cost of daycare for my two toddlers, was MORE than the mortgage on our house. ... The judge FORCED me into outside work. The job I got was low-pay. There's discrimination against single moms with really young kinds. When my 15 month-old got her immune system shocked-out by the extreme germs, she got sick, and came within moments of dying on me. It was one scary frightening moment.... They were asking me if my baby had been baptized? They really thought she was dying. Thank God, I had made the right decision to check in on her a special way. She was "well" when we got home... and turned into a blue rubber-dolly with lips stuck out in the air 40 minutes later!! I would have found her dead after coming home from work, and laying her down for a nap before fixing her a meal. She got sick from germs THAT FAST. Bacteria had entered her bloodstream, and turned her blood septic (poison). {That was the first and ONLY time I ever ever got angry with God and told him that I PROTESTED what I thought was His Will.} It was because of a student doctor's observation, that they saved her life.

So.... *wiped tears* ... *breath* Yes, daycare for the younger kids is COSTLY. Not just the cost of daycare, but the GERMS they pick up with an immune system that is still developing drives UP the MEDICAL bills. That 80-cents?? huh.

You are SAVING yourselves from costs that are invisible. AND though, it puts YOU at disadvantage because you are not adding to your Social Security Funds which staying at home. This 'discriminates' against Women in their older years. (The Patriarchy hides that one???? And pay is NOT equal.) It is TRULY a Sacrifice (Labor of Love) for a woman to make her career taking care of the family, and her relationship, too. Including, the relationship to her self (as in, getting refreshed, charging up self's batteries, having time to enjoy self by your self).

I understand his 'pride thing'...
Your only friend is your 'mom' ...
He doesn't even like you to talk with her...
Gosh! sooo gnarly.

There's a need for an infusing of Care into your lives.
You need those license-fees taken care of, and cell-phone activated.
Your husband needs some support?, with finances. I understand the 'man' thing... but ideally, he needs the input of a financial advisor/mentor. You both do.

Again... sorry, but, I'm going to bring up the mention of using faith-based people to see if you can get even a small infusing of assistance.

I want to ask if either of you have had any kind of affiliation (as children even) TO one of the mainstream churches?

Even the Jewish-Centers can provide mentor-assistance? I think about the Catholics (men, and women support), then the mainstream protestant religions and non-denoms.

I DO understand how icky and truly dry, uninspiritional, and sucky some dogmatic places are. AND, I know that there are some good people, with good hearts and wonderful programs to help people in the community with needs.

You might have to sort through some groups. (Some of them might tell you that astrology is witchcraft, etc... ugh, sorry??? so, you might have to keep that quieter-- although, you might find some closet appreciators or astrology within it, in a superficial way. .... Yeah. I understand their loathing of astrology. The pastors and priests, etc, have 'seen' the damage that happens to some people's mental health, if you can't keep astrology in healthy perspective. eg. you don't TRASH a relationship that works 'just because' the transits say to 'change'. ...
adage: If it AIN'T BROKE, why FIX/trashcan/throw-it-all-away? .. To me, it's like making mistakes like a student medical doctor???

The other places I have heard do 'good works' are some of the Unity and Universalist congregations. They support family. Some are into Meditation practices. These might be friendly and offer some help?

haha... I recall from a while ago.
In Daytona Beach, there's a college there who actually had courses in astrology available as an elective?
Why not fish out what that was about?
Maybe you can make an 'astrology' connection out there.
You seem to have a level of knowledge about astrology. (Cool). Maybe you could get into doing some astrology charts, and getting paid for it? ... That could be an avenue for you to be able to infuse a little cash, some day?
There used to be a more-prominent (locally) astrologer in that region.
(She taught those classes at DaytonaState. .... Maybe she needs assistance on a project you could do for her?, since you have very good solid familiarity with astrology, THAT has a level of worth. Takes a long time to have a certain proficiency at astrology. Some astrologers are crazy-busy. Maybe you can help her take some slack?)

So. Haha. Transiting Ceres in Cancer is ON my Mars Cancer.
tMars in Cancer is conjunct my Uranus and your Sun-Mars.
I also have a Uranus-Jupiter Cancer in contact your degrees, which sextile my Moon in Virgo h(9)leo.
My Vesta Cancer is conjunct your Ceres Cancer, and both of us have a Saturn Scorpio trine to those.
tCeres on my Mars Cancer also TRINES my own Neptune-rx Libra in the 10th house. .... So, when I say I "feel" you today!!! omg. Tears!!! I feel so much compassion for you. I REALLY want to 'feed you' and infuse you with feelings of Care--- AND practicalities!!! Always practicality along with Heart.

Oh! TOO much to SAY... and time keeps ticking.

I hope you can find some kind of nurturing AND practical information from what I offer.

posted July 13, 2017 01:14 PM            

Yay for virtual relationships, right?

With your husband's 'man-pride' thing.
I had mentioned how he is GOOD at manning-UP?, but he mistakes being a man with NOT needing help?

It would be a VERY MANLY act for him to seek out some Classy financial advisors/mentors. There ARE folks of well means out there who might be able to do pro bono for you guys, as a special gift!

By HIS lowering his pride now??? He could find a PLAN to INCREASE Wealth for you all. It would mean being 'humble' enough to open his private business in front of strangers? ... but in the LONG TERM... wow. You guys could get your acts together???

You're a TEAM. You said so. And you guys still love each other. THAT Love is a SEED that can reculture, recultivate?? As long as you have a small seed..... You can Grow a Great thing.

You can change your Life....
BELIEVE that there are people in this world that love to promote families and who would love to have a hand in seeing you Prosper.

posted July 18, 2017 08:01 PM            

Happy Birthday, JourneysRoar! (July 18)

Wishing you The Best Fortune that Life can offer you.

posted July 19, 2017 01:21 AM            

The most noteworthy item at the moment may be North Node's transit parallel/conjunct natal Mercury = the present importance of communication. Focus on what you are thinking and need to say and avoid abstract representations and metaphysical metaphors. Not a good time for dipping into astrology or other abstractions for answers no matter how tempting (transit of Neptune square natal Uranus, semi-sextile natal Jupiter).

Saturn trine natal Mercury shows it is time to take on those communication challenges with a sensible, but optimistic outlook that understanding can be reached. If you feel you need to apologize, do so. If you feel you need to get clarity and ask for better understanding, do so. But communicate. Speak, but also listen.

Part of what you've been experiencing is an ego/power struggle in which a balance is being sought (Saturn and Pluto in transit contra-parallel natal Sun) in which you and your partner or closest rivals can be at peace and each get what you want. But these things have a way of becoming psychological games or tug of war when they need not be.

Addressing communication directly will ease pressures and show that things are not necessarily as bad or tenuous as they seem.

I recommend that you not watch yours or your mate's transits/progressions for the next couple years (at least), that you not look at solar returns. It is not a question of your intelligence, but the speculative distortions your mind will do with interpretation (as illustrated above when aided by reductionist predictions) during Neptune square natal Uranus.

It would be better to consult a grounded, capable intuitive or card reader not one given to predictions, 'love and luck' nonsense. Even better would be to divert worrisome mental energies into a new creative outlet to at least give you some imaginative satisfaction.

posted July 19, 2017 06:54 PM            

Neptune square natal Uranus puts the planet of creative imagination (suspended consciousness) in driving tension with the natal urge for liberated cosmic connection. This means that what mind perceives under this influence may be liberating, but not according to any preconceived definitions. A certain amount of chaos need to be allowed, don't expect linear progress or practical solutions to problems to come out of it.

This is one of the most unlinear and unorganized combinations of planetary energies. Its prime effect seems to be to take one from one period of disappointment into renewed vision in which broader, freer possibilities are seen and felt. However, there is a strong element of instability here. Moods can change quickly based on drastically different considerations. Not a good time for making major life-changing decisions, because they will likely be under illusion.

Let this transit help you step from disillusionment to new dimensions of thought.

Idealism, ideologies, and metaphysical philosophies that present themselves at this time may seem alluring as 'the answer.' You won't know until after the transit is over (using 5° orb, so April 2020). It is best to explore these and follow your curiosity and be fueled by the excitement contained within them, but not think of them as delivering actual solutions to your current problems and challenges. It is a learning process. Think of it as a mind-stretching experience in which you can let your mind go outside its old boundaries.

You'll make the most of this period if engaging in a creative effort. Take the creative skill(s) you already have at the level they operate and indulge your imagination to the fullest. Bring into focus possibilities, images that feel like freedom, and modify and create them for yourself.

This can be a cleansing process. Just don't place any expectations for practical usage on what you are learning. This is transcendent, not practical, which means it is a mind-opening experience so that later you can organize what you've learned into something more practical.