posted October 19, 2018 04:16 AM            

it started when I thought my ex was going to kill me

it got really severe and I was scared to be alone, I thought he was maybe gonna do something to my car that would make it crash bc hes smart like that... or maybe that he'd have some gang banger come get me

then I actually had my seizures, which really brought that fear up but even worse. it felt like I left my body, I blacked out for so long and lost so much memory... and really felt like I was on the brink of death for a long time. I was so weak I couldn't even walk.

I started getting panic attacks bc it was hard to tell if I was about to have a seizure or if I was just anxious.... and you can actually die from seizures so it was so hard

it was the hardest time of my life, I can't even express how bad my mental state was. I was pregnant and I was so scared. I kept getting visions of my daughter crying as I was taken away in the ambulance (when I had my seizure)

thankfully, this was a year ago and in the past year I have worked through MOST of this anxiety.... but there is still the tip of it there.

but sometimes it comes to me at night. I had a palm reader tell me my life would be short. and my son has his moon in the 12th house. my card in the cards of destiny is the 9 of spades which is the death card.

it's just so hard you guys, because im struggling with releasing this last bit of the fear. I know it sounds stupid, but I feel like if I release the last bit of this that will be me "accepting death" and then I will actually die.

I keep going into meditation to release the last bit of fear and I get so afraid, like SO afraid. this is so hard for me to let go of. I feel so scared. I don't want to die! I want to be with my children.

I don't really know why I am sharing this, but its just been so so hard. the last few years have been the hardest times of my life.; physically and mentally and emotionally.

posted October 19, 2018 04:19 AM            

but there is no way out. I have to face it and I feel like if I do, I will be able to release this fear of death and really be reborn and live my life again, live in joy without fear.

posted October 19, 2018 04:40 AM            

This fear you have is from a recent past life i feel where you did die young,around the current age that you are.Details of this death is not needed.

What you do need to know IS that you will live.That you will continue to exist even after your death(im getting 80 years old for some reason).

In the lifr where you died young,you left behind everyone you loved and after your death you only saw darkness for the longest time as it was your belief in that life that you would cease to exist when you died.

Know now this belief is false.It is not of Love ans truth for the truth is You are Life.Therefore how can you,missblyss cease to exist(die in other words)

One helpful thing would be to review this life where you died young via guided meditation (with a trusted friend if you feel safer)and go beyond that point where you only sae darkness.

Go further in time when something else came into your awareness after the darkness that surrounded you.

Know that you are deeply loved and cherished..Your angels are alwaya near you,protecting and guiding you.

Hugs.

posted October 19, 2018 10:49 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Aurora_girl1990:
Hugs you tighly.

This fear you have is from a recent past life i feel where you did die young,around the current age that you are.Details of this death is not needed.

What you do need to know IS that you will live.That you will continue to exist even after your death(im getting 80 years old for some reason).

In the lifr where you died young,you left behind everyone you loved and after your death you only saw darkness for the longest time as it was your belief in that life that you would cease to exist when you died.

Know now this belief is false.It is not of Love ans truth for the truth is You are Life.Therefore how can you,missblyss cease to exist(die in other words)

One helpful thing would be to review this life where you died young via guided meditation (with a trusted friend if you feel safer)and go beyond that point where you only sae darkness.

Go further in time when something else came into your awareness after the darkness that surrounded you.

Know that you are deeply loved and cherished..Your angels are alwaya near you,protecting and guiding you.

Hugs.

Lots of Love,
J

---

thank you love

ive actually heard this before a few times.

I was told in another life that my daughter was my mom and that I died when I was young and it created a huge trauma bond between us because she never got over it and now fears losing me

can you imagine how much it would scare her when I was unconscious and convulsing and then having to be taken away in an ambulance in front of her with this past life memory... she was only 3!

it was very traumatic with my ex too in terms of stimulating fears bc ive literally seen him plan to try to kill people in the most evil secretive ways where he would never get caught. so it wasn't far fetched to assume that he could do it to me when we were deep in a nasty court battle