|
Author
|
Topic: a different take on revenge
|
maklhouf
Knowflake Posts: 166
From:
Registered: Nov 2003
|
posted August 12, 2004 07:14 AM
 
Whenever I tried to exact retribution on my brother, my mother,a religious woman, would intone: "Revenge is mine, saith the Lord." This was patently unfair, I thought, since it was only her refusal to do her motherly job and punish my brother occasionally for the countless calumnies he inflicted on me, that made my revenge necessary.
Given there's an awful lot of dysfunctional parenting about, naturally many people will reach adulthood with a rather confused idea of how they should treat other people.
It may therefore be necessary, after VERY careful consideration, to do a job of what might be Fluffily titled, "late parenting" on an individual. Such action might also look like revenge. Just be very careful of your motives. ------------------
Everybody wants to be loved, but sometimes it is better to be feared. IP: Logged |
StarLover33
Moderator Posts: 2334
From: King Arthur's Camelot
Registered: Jun 2002
|
posted August 13, 2004 11:24 AM
 IP: Logged |
Randall
Webmaster Posts: 18503
From: Columbus, GA USA
Registered: Nov 2000
|
posted August 14, 2004 03:57 PM
 ------------------
"Never mentally imagine for another that which you would not want to experience for yourself, since the mental image you send out inevitably comes back to you." Rebecca Clark IP: Logged |
LibraSparkle
Moderator Posts: 1316
From: Vancouver USA
Registered: May 2004
|
posted August 18, 2004 07:24 PM
I'm going through a type of therapy called EMDR therapy. It's a relatively new treatment for PTSD. It deals with rapid eyemovement... sorta like hypnosis, but for some reason or other my psych doesn't like that term.Anyhow... basically through this treatment it is my job to go back and "re-parent" that little abused child. I have flashbacks of the abuse, but see them through my adult eyes rather than the child's. Anyhow, thought I'd share this with ya, since it seems kinda similar. IP: Logged |
maklhouf
Knowflake Posts: 166
From:
Registered: Nov 2003
|
posted August 19, 2004 06:30 AM
I think it is a fabulous idea. Actually there are quite a few things you can try. Not being American, I am somewhat wary of the psycho-analytical trip. Don't get too dependent, but your shrink sounds OKIP: Logged |
LibraSparkle
Moderator Posts: 1316
From: Vancouver USA
Registered: May 2004
|
posted August 19, 2004 01:34 PM
mak, what other suggestions do you have?I'm always open to new suggestions  IP: Logged |
maklhouf
Knowflake Posts: 166
From:
Registered: Nov 2003
|
posted August 21, 2004 05:57 AM
I recall you've talked about this elsewhere. Do you want to give me a link to the previous discussion and I'll see if I have any thoughts. Are you having physiotherapy with your psychotherapy?IP: Logged |
silverbells
Knowflake Posts: 1267
From: maryland
Registered: Apr 2003
|
posted August 21, 2004 05:07 PM
LibraSparkle - I have never heard of that kind of therapy. Where did you hear about it? Could you say more about it? Does it help and how do you like it?------------------
Get some love in your groove, just get hip to forgive... - Michael Franks IP: Logged |
LibraSparkle
Moderator Posts: 1316
From: Vancouver USA
Registered: May 2004
|
posted August 21, 2004 10:31 PM
mak, I'm not having physiotherapy. Isn't physiotherapy the same as Physical Therapy? I think the string you're thinking of is Karma and Abuse in UC. I'll see if I can dig it up.silverbells, Here's some info about EMDR therapy from http://www.acenter4growth.com/emdr.html
EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) is an amazing new form of therapy that uses rapid eye movement to quickly heal many emotional problems that formerly took years with more traditional methods of psychotherapy. Up until a few years ago, certain conditions were very resistant to treatment and were considered to be lifetime disabilities. Thanks to EMDR, we now can offer hope to many who suffer from these conditions.
EMDR is so new that we are still finding the limits of its effectiveness. Some of the areas it has been extremely successful with, so far, have been PTSD, trauma, childhood wounds, including abuse, irrational thoughts, fears, phobias, and panic anxiety. Currently, the use of EMDR with chronic pain, asthma, and even learning disabilities is being explored.
While we are not sure of the physiological basis of EMDR, we are postulating a theory. If you were to cut yourself, your body would heal naturally, unless bacteria infected the wound. Perhaps the mind also has a method for self-healing - Rapid Eye Movement (REM) Sleep. During the night the mind proceses the events of the day, sorting out the irrational or useless information, resolving experiences and sorting it in the appropriate part of the memory. Perhaps the "bacteria" of the mind is trauma. When we are traumatized, in any way, the event is "frozen" in the mind, unable to be processed and resolved naturally. It is as if the mind stays on "Red Alert". The results are upsetting thoughts and symptoms, as well as emotional distress.
Until recently, we thought that trauma altered brain chemistry permanently. We now believe that eye movement may somehow the natural healing process that reverses that effect. Perhaps neuro-chemically, the eye movement stimulates the two hemispheres of the brain to communicate with each other, arriving at new conclusions, so that the original trauma no longer contains the negative emotional charge originally associated with it.
Is EMDR like hypnosis?
Yes and no. Unlike hypnotherapy, the client is totally awake and alert. There is no trance state and the client is in complete control at all times. Also, unlike hypnotherapy, the healing takes place during the procedure and at a rate 4-5 times faster. Like hypnotherapy, EMDR seems to be working through the subconscious, bringing out memories, details, information, etc. sometimes long forgotten, repressed, or merely disregarded, because it did not fit our distorted reality.
IP: Logged |
maklhouf
Knowflake Posts: 166
From:
Registered: Nov 2003
|
posted August 24, 2004 07:29 AM
mm ... interesting, and very elegant Librasparkle. We'll leave it at that.IP: Logged | |
Lindaland
UBBFriend: Email This Page to Someone! 
