Posts: 169
From: Heiskell, TN 37754
Registered: Dec 2004

posted August 09, 2005 10:34 PM         

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I am tired of the circles under my eyes from lack of sufficient sleep. I'm tired of waking up crying, sweating, or worse yet saying "I love you" to think air.
I know I should eat, and I do but I have no appetite. I've given up on crying, there is nothing left anyway. I'm tired of walking outside at 3 am to look at the stars, only to find they don't comfort me anymore. I'm afraid to touch anyone for fear that I will break and sometimes because the thought of never feeling his touch again makes me feel like poison. I don't know who to face and I don't know what to say. I feel smaller than I've ever felt before, making my normal acceptance of being a piece of this puzzle we call the universe, seem like nothing more than a speck. I've run out of reasons to be angry and if I'm completely honest with myself, I've forgiven both of us for our ignorance. I just want him to call. I just want to be his friend. I just want to love him with everything I have. I just want my best friend back. I just want my boyfriend back. I want la femme back. I want my family back. I want my life BACK.

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love is not love which alters when it alteration finds, or bends with the remover to remove.
William Shakespeare

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Posts: 1833
From: Stafford, VA USA
Registered: Feb 2005

posted August 10, 2005 09:07 AM         

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Posts: 315
From: new zealand
Registered: Dec 2004

posted August 13, 2005 07:21 PM         

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Nothing exists in divine mind except for that which is absolutely necessary

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