posted January 08, 2006 11:56 PM         

I've been so downhearted, Baby.

A year.

So downhearted

since the rabid exposure
of our plucking sin

There was no serpant~
a myth, a scapegoat

there was only you
only me

the first~the last
on the earth to discover
Universal-Fire-Magic
tapped from vulnerability

You fled
From the heat
of the wagging fingers
the snide booming thunder
that would never, could never
understand.

(you said that once~
'they will never understand'
what consolation if any is there
in knowing?)

fled so far into
your private cancer-womb
seeking nomadic safety from the
Accusing storm

leaving me alone
to defend the purity of our love
from the blinding inquisition

Sole in a barren world,
too tepid to be chartered
for its winding roads of
hypocrisies and indifference

O, so dark the world became to me!

witheld
ostracised

from the beautiful
sun-stream of your affection;

the one and only comfort
that would have saved me
from myself

no other wrath
as completely, aggresively
condemning as
my own.

Punished so severly
for crimes not understood

an ethereal Being!
too delicate of Soul
to touch feet
on the harsh environment
of this alien world, unchartered, unreal, so oblivious

Muse-less, Devoid.

My soul shattered back there
in peices around me

no more fight left in me
without you
to gather them
and form a puzzle-form for face

Shining bare and skinless
for all to see

deep into the core of my naked misery.

Don't search
whatever hope and promise
still gleams deep within my eyes

my Heart, my nudity is my own
no longer hungerly devoured
nor given in that pure Innocence
I once in tender-new time
so naively gave to you.

And the hunters with their
self-fulfilling, feasting desires

if only they knew
the harrowed depths of these
winding passageways
and the tortured chambers they lead

I have no armor
to protect me

but this burning love

this most precious belief

slipping more away from
me in the glass shards
of the days

the weight of our forsaken dreams
sliding from my arms
for all my fight,
my fiery determined
fight

to hold them

to protect them

Cradled

as sacred
as they were born
in
the innocent freedom of our discovery

Our discovery

so downhearted, Baby...

so downhearted...