posted September 06, 2006 07:53 PM         

In the meantime, sensitivity, even unharnessed sensitivity, still has its benefits.

"In the psychopathic temperament we have the emotionality which is the sine qua non (('without which, nothing')) of moral perception; we have the intensity and tendency to emphasis which are the essence of practical moral vigor; and we have the love of metaphysics and mysticism which carry one's interests beyond the surface of the sensible world. What, then, is more natural than that this temperament should introduce one to regions of religious truth, to corners of the universe, which your robust Philistine type of nervous system, forever offering its biceps to be felt, thumping its breast, and thanking Heaven that it hasn't a single morbid fibre in its composition, would be sure to hide forever from its self-satisfied possessors? If there were such a thing as inspiration from a higher realm, it might well be that the neurotic temperament would furnish the chief condition of the requisite receptivity."

- William James

"Everything great that we know has come from neurotics. It is they and only they who have founded religions and created great works of art. Never will the world be aware of how much it owes to them, nor, above all, what they have sufferred in order to bestow their gifts upon it."

- Marcel Proust

I think people should have the choice of whether or not to be bi-polar. I'm not sure everyone would choose not to.

Someone close to me is emerging from a time of emotional numbness, and, she assures me, "It is better to feel. It is better to be alive."

Love to you,
HSC

posted September 06, 2006 10:01 PM         

"At fourteen I fell into one of those fits of bottomless despair that come with adolescence, and I seriously thought of dying..."

- simone weil

posted September 06, 2006 10:02 PM         

Love

Love bade me welcome: yet my soul drew back,
Guilty of dust and sin.
But quick-ey'd Love, observing me grow slack
From my first entrance in,
Drew nearer to me, sweetly questioning,
If I lack'd anything.
A guest, I answer'd, worthy to be here:
Love said, You shall be he.
I the unkind, ungrateful? Ah my dear,
I cannot look on thee.
Love took my hand, and smiling did reply,
Who made the eyes but I?
Truth Lord, but I have marr'd them: let my shame
Go where it doth deserve.
And know you not, says Love, who bore the blame?
My dear, then I will serve.
You must sit down, says Love, and taste my meat:
So I did sit and eat.

- George Herbert, 1593-1633

posted September 07, 2006 01:46 PM         

Sorry about the age mix-up.
For some reason I got it into my head
that you were only 15 years old.

Well, you are still young.
The twenties can be a rough time.

posted September 08, 2006 12:13 PM         

Wouldnt go back to my teens or twenties for all the tea in China (and I love tea..lol)...

I was very screwed up and it wasnt until I got into my 30s that I began to heal my wounds...

Dont lose heart D.....time does heal, I really believe that.

And despite what people say about aging (for me) it has brought immense confidence and peace of mind....

I dont fear being 50 as I thought I would (I am told it is the new 30)!

love and peace

posted September 09, 2006 09:10 AM         

I relate to you, in as much as I was so angry with my parents. I wrote hundreds of poems about them which were scathing and harsh. When I look back at how I felt it is hardly recognizable. I can remember feeling hate for my Dad..rage, bitterness. Now, although he irritates me, I feel great love for him and friendship. He is one of my closest kindreds....

Its okay to be angry with our family....its normal, and also a sign that you are breaking away and becoming a whole person....

Dont worry about it....you will and are becoming extremely strong and individual....

GOOD FOR YOU !!!!

love