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Author Topic:   "Surrender"
Virgo-AriesArtist
Knowflake

Posts: 248
From: Michigan :)
Registered: Jun 2009

posted February 06, 2011 12:48 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Virgo-AriesArtist     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I really don't care to censor myself anymore

I'm tired of feeling bad for feeling

I love and I love the only way I know how

I'm not sorry if it confuses or is "too much "

I make no excuses for being out of place

I can't see what comes next and that's ok

I'm done being attached, and obsession is exhausting

I can't be anything I'm not designed to be

I'm done with judging what comes from someone else

I'm at the wits end of questioning what's real

I'm on my knees crying with clairity

The first time I've felt it in years

Why am I so free in this heightened moment,

So lost in feeling lost I can't seem to care?

I am finished being human and grounding

I can't take another day of tearing the pieces of me apart

If I love you, I let you know it,

I can't ask the same of you; it's not my place

I love you all in the only way I know how

imperfect I am, please know that now

We share a love of life, and that is all that matters

All I know is to be honest and be me

I can't play the games anymore, I have to let it go

If we can't talk for a while don't take it personally

I need to find my path, so desperately

And finding it can't be accomplished with anyone else but me

I shed the skins of past pain and feeling worthless in someone else's eyes

I shed the need for you to love me the way I want you to

I'm torn but whole as I type these words,

Let me elevate to where I must transcend all this pettniess

I can finally breathe for the first time in so damn long

I know the night will envelope me and warmly embrace as it's meant to be

I need the rawness of this pain to bring me up, deeply hurt,

It's the only way I'll find the door on my path

I shake and tremble in the way I move,it hurts so deep I cannot explain,

Guide me on this path and make my way not smooth,

I'll find the best lessons in what doesn't work

I can't be the girl who is cut off from love,

but that must begin with loving me

I can't stand my own face in the mirror most days

and that's hard to admit

The core of me is ashamed to say how much I can't stand me

The ego wants to say I don't feel that but I do

I can't love what I despise, from my father's features to the shade of my complexion

it all eats me up in self-hatred

I purge these uncertainties from my system

and watch them rush down the drain in satisfaction

I need to be here, washing my past pain away to ever feel whole

I need to be done with this drama and what it does to my soul

I find peace in the most unlikely places and in the space in between

Where my musings makes sense, and no one hears my cries and screams...

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Ami Anne
Moderator

Posts: 7547
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010

posted February 06, 2011 09:27 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Ami Anne     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
((((Virgo Aries Artist))))

------------------
Jesus never put his trust in man cuz he knew what was in man.
You have to be strong enough to be gentle.Peace through strength,ALWAYS
Me

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EverEvolvingSpirit
Knowflake

Posts: 954
From: A Place of Pure Love <3
Registered: Feb 2011

posted February 09, 2011 09:45 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for EverEvolvingSpirit     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
This is beautiful and you are beautiful, VAA.

From the soul

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Randall
Webmaster

Posts: 7111
From: The Goober Galaxy
Registered: Apr 2009

posted February 09, 2011 11:55 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Randall     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Very sad...but very brilliant.

------------------
"Cooking is like love. It should be entered into with abandon or not at all." Harriet Van Horne

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Virgo-AriesArtist
Knowflake

Posts: 248
From: Michigan :)
Registered: Jun 2009

posted February 10, 2011 06:40 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Virgo-AriesArtist     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Thank you for reading this Ami, EES, and Randall. It flowed out of me after reaching a new point in emotion, and also after I read the "Celestine Prophecy". I paused and let Spirit send me the words...

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light_of_life
Newflake

Posts: 6
From: Ozark, Mo, USA
Registered: Mar 2011

posted March 22, 2011 11:19 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for light_of_life     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
hey vaa if you need someone to tslk to im here hun....

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Virgo-AriesArtist
Knowflake

Posts: 248
From: Michigan :)
Registered: Jun 2009

posted March 23, 2011 10:06 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Virgo-AriesArtist     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Thanks, light_of_life! I appreciate the offer of listening

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Randall
Webmaster

Posts: 7111
From: The Goober Galaxy
Registered: Apr 2009

posted March 24, 2011 01:14 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Randall     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote

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Mystic Melody
Moderator

Posts: 120
From: IL
Registered: Dec 2010

posted March 28, 2011 04:04 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Mystic Melody     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
WOW love that emotion

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Cancer/Scorpio729
Moderator

Posts: 660
From: 6,000 feet above sea level
Registered: Feb 2010

posted March 28, 2011 09:23 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Cancer/Scorpio729     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Ohhh sweety, you need a hug. No, you need a massive group hug with like, 10-15 people. And then you deserve some serious spoiling

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Cancer/Scorpio729
Moderator

Posts: 660
From: 6,000 feet above sea level
Registered: Feb 2010

posted March 28, 2011 09:23 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Cancer/Scorpio729     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
stupid dp

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