Lindaland
  Astrology 2.0
  I'm heartbroken. (Page 1)

Post New Topic  Post A Reply
profile | register | preferences | faq

UBBFriend: Email This Page to Someone!
This topic is 3 pages long:   1  2  3 
next newest topic | next oldest topic
Author Topic:   I'm heartbroken.
GemGemGem
Knowflake

Posts: 39
From:
Registered: Apr 2009

posted March 22, 2009 12:18 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for GemGemGem     Edit/Delete Message
I'm sorry I'm so sad and upset right now I just have to vent. I'm actually out with friends and I had to find out second hand that the guy I'm dating is dating another girl. I was so upset that he didn't contact me for the weekend and I kept telling myself he's just busy, and not to be so needy. His friends were talking about him at dinner and it slipped out that he's out with this other girl right now. Apparently one hes apparently in love with. Why the hell did he go out with me all those times then. Why did he kiss me and lead me on when there is another girl he likes more. I feel stupid for all the time and thought I put into him. I really liked him. I am so crushed . I'm out with friends so I have to keep it together but my heart is so crushed. I don't know why he lied to me. I feel so stupid right now. This feeling in my heart hurts so much.

Sorry I just had to vent.

IP: Logged

redstar
unregistered
posted March 22, 2009 12:21 AM           Edit/Delete Message
(((GemGemGem)))


IP: Logged

Lara
Knowflake

Posts: 420
From: aspideronmars
Registered: Apr 2009

posted March 22, 2009 12:24 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Lara     Edit/Delete Message
aww GemGemGem

I'm sorry.

Big {{{{{{{{{hug}}}}}}}} to you. Just remember that after every storm there is a rainbow x

IP: Logged

snohawk1
unregistered
posted March 22, 2009 01:03 AM           Edit/Delete Message
Putting the Player into Dork, huh?

Well that sucks, anyway. It sounded like you were having fun with him.

IP: Logged

Geocosmic Valentine
Knowflake

Posts: 0
From: New York, NY
Registered: Apr 2009

posted March 22, 2009 01:07 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Geocosmic Valentine     Edit/Delete Message
GemGemGem,

You are NOT stupid. You are a human being who takes healthy risks and you put yourself out there to receive goodness from the universe. Unfortunately there are some "boogie heads" out there who ruin it for you.

Stop pretending you're OK if you're not. If you need to go home, then do that. And perhaps wait until you hear it from him instead of getting it second hand. Your second hand source might be right, but if it's not, your joy for the evening has been ruined over a rumor.

Please be kind to yourself through this, it's not easy.

Here's another hug for you. {{{{{HUG}}}}}

IP: Logged

Astra
Knowflake

Posts: 11
From:
Registered: Apr 2009

posted March 22, 2009 01:08 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Astra     Edit/Delete Message
Aww...Gem, I'm so sorry! Forget him. Who wants to be with a cheater anyway?

IP: Logged

wildwhiterose23
unregistered
posted March 22, 2009 02:18 AM           Edit/Delete Message
I am sorry too. I hope you feel better soon.

IP: Logged

gorgeousbutterfly
unregistered
posted March 22, 2009 02:26 AM           Edit/Delete Message
i feel you. you should be glad you have someone like that out of your life before your feelings got too far.

IP: Logged

Adriana
Knowflake

Posts: 2
From:
Registered: May 2009

posted March 22, 2009 05:39 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Adriana     Edit/Delete Message
I'm so sorry for you! This guy is not worth it.. Find someone that will appriciate you for who YOU are. You deserve so much better.

IP: Logged

kaira
unregistered
posted March 22, 2009 07:29 AM           Edit/Delete Message
annihilate him.

IP: Logged

Diandra23
unregistered
posted March 22, 2009 07:35 AM           Edit/Delete Message

Gem...im very sorry.

BUt it was better to know now,while you were not so deeply attatchedd,then later when you could actually fall in love isns it?

He is a...jerk..so kick him in the but with a stilleto shoe.

IP: Logged

Dulce Luna
Knowflake

Posts: 7
From: The Asylum, NC
Registered: Apr 2009

posted March 22, 2009 09:09 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Dulce Luna     Edit/Delete Message
Oi chica, I'm so sorry the guy turned out to be a complete jerkoff. ((((big hugs))) If you need time alone to let it out then GCV is right, by all means take that time to yourself. But remember we're here if you wanna vent.

IP: Logged

lechien
Knowflake

Posts: 22
From: Germany
Registered: May 2009

posted March 22, 2009 09:42 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for lechien     Edit/Delete Message
gem, that totally blows and i feel for you. i really hope you'll feel better soon.

but i promise that sooner or later, you'll think nothing of him and laugh about it all. i hope you'll reach that day without much pain. hugs!!

IP: Logged

Lucia23
Knowflake

Posts: 36
From:
Registered: Apr 2009

posted March 22, 2009 12:26 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Lucia23     Edit/Delete Message
Aw, sorry!!!!

That completely sucks, but...and I'm not sure I should say this when are hurt and need to vent...in my secondhand experience with friends (because the very idea of "dating" absolutely crushes my Leo idea of romance--in my preference and romantic history two people see each other, fall in love at first sight, become close friends, f*ck, and then spend the next few years negotiating life together...testing each other out romantically before falling in love seems backwards to me) people who "date" a lot in NYC pretty much assume that the relationship is not exclusive.

The exclusivity question comes up when sex is involved, and/or when there's a Talk.

So, it really might not mean he's "in love" with some girl, and not with you...it could be that, just like you, he's uncertain about all the mutual mixed signals, hedging his bets, and trying to get to know a few people romantically to see what kind of connection is there.

Then again, another thing with New York dating--grown-ups over 27 dating in this city are either a) fresh out of an actual real-life relationship (like I am, or you are), OR b) more hooked to images/ideas of how love "should" be and not able to really connect. When I was very first single I got entangled with a very cute Cap/Aqua like this...he's NEVER actually, say, gone on a one-week vacation with a girl, or lived together.

If you like the Plork enough to want to see if you could have a relationship, understand that in this particular culture, climate, milieu he probably feels he is doing nothing wrong, and sees the two of you as not at all close enough/committed enough yet to be exclusive. I also seriously think that the whole weekend where you didn't get phone calls and therefore, inadvertently rejected him after an awesome date probably activated ALL of his crabby defenses, so the side of him he could've shown (asking you out all the time and saying gooey things about his feelings for you) got squelched for the next four to seven years. I know not everyone on Lindaland agrees with me. There probably hasn't been any giant, reassuring indication on your side that you're wildly into him, not dating anyone else, and wanting more time with him. It's awfully early in the relationship.

On the other hand, it's understandable if you wanna just de-Plork forever. Chances are this guy is really, REALLY not ready for a one-on-one, deep relationship, and his unreadiness will keep coming up.

But I really do think it's normal here for people to date and keep dating other people, and not talk about it. Veteran-dater friends of mine see the relationship becoming sexual as a time to broach the topic of exclusivity.

IP: Logged

venusmars
Knowflake

Posts: 67
From:
Registered: Apr 2009

posted March 22, 2009 03:28 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for venusmars     Edit/Delete Message
Im sorry Gem..
Yes now youre heartbroken but you will be fine..
You will be with someone who worths it in a short time,Im sure..since you are a warm hearted,nice young woman..Think positive,you found this out at the beginning..

IP: Logged

Lara
Knowflake

Posts: 420
From: aspideronmars
Registered: Apr 2009

posted March 22, 2009 03:34 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Lara     Edit/Delete Message
Yes i agree with venusmars
Thank goodness you found out now! Give yourself lots of TLC and soon you will be in love with a much better and more respectful man.

you deserve it because you are a lovely person so allow that person to now enter your life

IP: Logged

enchantress299
Knowflake

Posts: 3
From:
Registered: May 2009

posted March 22, 2009 04:33 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for enchantress299     Edit/Delete Message
Awww... :-( I'm sorry Gem. That sucks!

------------------
Virgo Sun/Aries Moon/Scorpio Rising

IP: Logged

GemGemGem
Knowflake

Posts: 39
From:
Registered: Apr 2009

posted March 22, 2009 05:02 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for GemGemGem     Edit/Delete Message
Thanks so much everyone for you supportive words, love, and hugs. They really mean so much to me, and I'm touched that everyone cares so much!

I posted that thread from my Iphone last night while in the middle of dinner with our mutual friends. They didn't know we were dating because we didn't tell anyone to avoid gossip. So his guy friends had no idea, when they started talking about him, and saying he was in Staten Island that night with "the girl" and he wasn't picking up his phone. I was sitting right next to them and had to listen to them talk about how much he liked this girl, but she was giving him the run around for so long...I was trying so hard to hold it together, and not cry. So i did the only thing I could....picked up my Iphone, vented, and pretended not to be listening.
After all that Cancer plork confusion, we had a talk and worked things out and were actually dating. He sweet talked me, and I actually started to let down my wall. I even kissed te guy, which I know seems like nothing, but I haven't done that with anyone in over a year! So all the times he would disappear, I gave him the benefit of the doubt, and wanted to give him sufficient space. (His Aqua Moon and all) But he was really going to see the girl he really liked in Staten Island who I guess had been aloof and blowing him off recently, which is why he turned to me to temporarily bandage his wounded ego! He used me as a filler. I was a space holder to him, until the girl he really wanted came around. No wonder he disappeared every weekend. He was with her.

What really hurts is I thought he genuinely cared about me, cause that's the impression he gave. I don't know how someone can just lie to a person like that, and have no regard for another person's feelings.

I feel so stupid, and so hurt. There really are guys out there that will just use you with no guilt or second thoughts.

IP: Logged

cheshirekat
unregistered
posted March 22, 2009 05:09 PM           Edit/Delete Message

Clearing out the two-timing plork for a sexy man for a very special Gem =3,look out!<3

IP: Logged

Geocosmic Valentine
Knowflake

Posts: 0
From: New York, NY
Registered: Apr 2009

posted March 22, 2009 05:15 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Geocosmic Valentine     Edit/Delete Message
Hi GemGemGem,

I just want to repeat, you are NOT stupid. Yes, you did have your suspicions but just because you didn't follow them doesn't make you stupid. Please keep this in mind and take it in: FEELINGS DO NOT RESPECT INTELLECT.

If they did, we wouldn't jump into half of the situations we get into in life. You're not the one who made a mistake, he lied to you by implying that he cared about you enough not to see other people. It's called being provocative. That doesn't make you stupid, it makes him an a$$hole.

I suspect that other woman will blow him off again and he'll deserve it more than ever.

...by the way, kissing IS a big deal. It's one of the reason many prostitutes won't do it with clients unless they pay extra. For some reason it makes things more intimate and emotionally involved. So don't put yourself down. This is difficult enough without beating yourself up. Keep taking care of yourself, give yourself excellent gentle self care.

IP: Logged

emma_duncan
Knowflake

Posts: 24
From:
Registered: Apr 2009

posted March 22, 2009 07:08 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for emma_duncan     Edit/Delete Message

he obviously is a player...and he knows that things like holding a girls hand while walking and keeping it in pocket works with fairer sex.....

i hope u feel better...

IP: Logged

Lara
Knowflake

Posts: 420
From: aspideronmars
Registered: Apr 2009

posted March 22, 2009 07:10 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Lara     Edit/Delete Message
quote:
FEELINGS DO NOT RESPECT INTELLECT.

Very true. Gem, listen to Geocosmic - she's consistently wise and her words are really true.

IP: Logged

Lara
Knowflake

Posts: 420
From: aspideronmars
Registered: Apr 2009

posted March 22, 2009 07:42 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Lara     Edit/Delete Message
this is for you GemGemGem...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EGOJkJFC5Pg

IP: Logged

Lucia23
Knowflake

Posts: 36
From:
Registered: Apr 2009

posted March 22, 2009 08:27 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Lucia23     Edit/Delete Message
quote:
After all that Cancer plork confusion, we had a talk and worked things out and were actually dating.

Wow, does this mean you had actually agreed to date exclusively, and he just blatently lied? What an ass.

IP: Logged

venusmars
Knowflake

Posts: 67
From:
Registered: Apr 2009

posted March 22, 2009 09:06 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for venusmars     Edit/Delete Message

<<They didn't know we were dating because we didn't tell anyone to avoid gossip.>>


Arghhh..
I had a relationship like that last summer,we were friends and we got many mutual friends with that leo guy,so he said "lets not tell anyone,they talk too much!"I accepted..I thought we may tell later after the relationship grows a bit..

Then one night,after the 3rd month of our relationship,I was at a diner in a restaurant with my girlfriends,he came there with another woman..I will never forget what I felt that time,I had to sit there and watch them He didnt even said hello to me.He panicked,snacked quickly and left there in half an hour. It was hard,I also felt soo stupid..Then I learnt he was with 2 other woman besides me that summer.

But now I see I tortured myself with these thoughts..I was so strong and proud.I never called him,neither did he..but he came to my work place many times to talk to me.I ignored him and I still do...he doesnt deserve one word,even one look..what a good punishment for a leo guy LOL..

So we all deserve better Gem..you are strong and good hearted thats all,never stupid..

IP: Logged


This topic is 3 pages long:   1  2  3 

All times are Eastern Standard Time

next newest topic | next oldest topic

Administrative Options: Close Topic | Archive/Move | Delete Topic
Post New Topic  Post A Reply
Hop to:

Contact Us | Linda-Goodman.com

Copyright © 2008

Powered by Infopop www.infopop.com © 2000
Ultimate Bulletin Board 5.46a