Posts: 450
From: canada
Registered: Apr 2009

posted July 26, 2009 01:26 AM         

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hey lara where are you. havent seen you on latly are you doing ok. If your not ok let us cheer you up we can post pictures of men like in the blue moon thread.

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Posts: 450
From: canada
Registered: Apr 2009

posted July 26, 2009 01:31 AM         

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Posts: 207
From: New York, NY
Registered: Apr 2009

posted July 26, 2009 03:14 AM         

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Hi DepTaurus,

I was reading some other threads that she started and I think she is going through some strong difficulties right now. I've got my fingers crossed that things will be OK soon. I don't think it's illness, I think it's personal private stuff.

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Posts: 450
From: canada
Registered: Apr 2009

posted July 26, 2009 03:54 AM         

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i hope she comes back soon lindaland would not be the same without her.

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Posts: 228
From: Sydney, Australia
Registered: Apr 2009

posted July 26, 2009 05:55 AM         

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What ever happened to WIlliam?

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•' •.♥♫♫´°°♫ • Life is Beautiful •.♥.•♫°°´♫♫ ♥ •

•Sun• Cancer
•Moon• Gemini
•Mars• Cancer
•Mercury• Cancer
•Venus• Leo

•••Virgo Rising•••

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Posts: 1213
From: aspideronmars
Registered: Apr 2009

posted July 26, 2009 05:00 PM         

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aww Dep, thanks for this sweet thread.

I'm around a bit - as Geo said i'm having a few major problems in the real world concerning my kids and their dad (((((
It's a nightmare and i'm not at all sure what to do about it actually. Feel helpless.

I'm having internet problems too again... no email, finding it hard to get onto here... is Mercury about to go rx or something?!?!

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From:
Registered: Jun 2009

posted July 26, 2009 05:29 PM         

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Lara, I hope the situation gets better. Sending you all the best!

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Posts: 1213
From: aspideronmars
Registered: Apr 2009

posted July 26, 2009 05:37 PM         

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Thanks ABC

It's looking ugly.. always hard when a child decides not to see one of their parents and the other parent gets the blame for the lack of contact!

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From:
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posted July 26, 2009 05:39 PM         

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Lara! That sounds gruesome! I hope all works out for the best, whatever the outcome of this challenging period.

Good Luck!

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Posts: 1213
From: aspideronmars
Registered: Apr 2009

posted July 26, 2009 05:45 PM         

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Thanks Unmoved.

The legal system in the UK is sh1te and i am torn between having my ex verbally abuse me and being in breach of the court OR sending my son against his will to his screaming dad

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From: No Permanent Address
Registered: Apr 2009

posted July 26, 2009 05:48 PM         

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Lara, do you do visualizations? Have you tried using it on this one?

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Posts: 1213
From: aspideronmars
Registered: Apr 2009

posted July 26, 2009 05:56 PM         

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I do Deux but i feel like i'm in a thunderstorm right now and can't see or think straight.

Can you tell me what i should visualize please?

The problem is i KNOW how abusive my ex can be and i trust my son... if he is doing to my son what he did to me then it's really a tragic situation.

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Posts: 450
From: canada
Registered: Apr 2009

posted July 26, 2009 05:57 PM         

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lara that sounds like your having a confused time in your life. and i kinda feel guity for starting this thread cause i dont want you to feel like you cant get away from your problems by just coming here and taking your mind off of things.
i really hope things get better. it does not sound good for you right now.

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Posts: 1213
From: aspideronmars
Registered: Apr 2009

posted July 26, 2009 06:02 PM         

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Hey Dep, don't feel guilty. It's cool... i'm happy that people on LL care so much and are so sweet.

Thank you

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Posts: 402
From:
Registered: Apr 2009

posted July 26, 2009 06:03 PM         

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Lara, let me share something.

When i was very young, around 4, i refused to go to my dad's when my parents separated. I would hide under the bed.

When i was 13, my mum informed me that my dad had died. Even though i had refused to go, i still thought, hoped, believed that my dad would always be there later for me, like my mum had been.

That is MY story, not your son's, but i wanted to share it.

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Posts: 1213
From: aspideronmars
Registered: Apr 2009

posted July 26, 2009 06:07 PM         

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Thanks for sharing that Pire. I'm sure it must have been hard for you.

It's so difficult when there is some form of anger involved because i feel the need to protect my son.

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From: No Permanent Address
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posted July 26, 2009 06:17 PM         

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Lara, you have to find your center before this situation will be solved. I know it's difficult to relax being in your position, but if you keep on worrying, solving it will take longer. I'm sure you already know this but I'm reminding you that the chaos you're seeing outside you is a reflection of discord that's going on inside you. You still have bad feelings for your ex, so your kid is picking up on the vibes and expressing it in his own way.

Get into a relaxed meditative state. Imagine your son and his father in front of you. Visualize loving energy (golden or pink or white) surrounding the two of them. Then say this again and again with faith: "I call on Divine Love to heal this relationship. Divine Love is doing its perfect work in this situation now". Next, imagine them in an ideal situation like talking, laughing or playing. That's all.

Do this as often as possible, and whenever you're having worries. Lots of problems can be solved by the power of love. I hope this works for you as it has done for many people, then I'll give you something to use to make your Ex help you financially in raising his son.

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Posts: 402
From:
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posted July 26, 2009 06:18 PM         

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I know, u want to protect your son.

A dad should also do that, protect his son.

In my story, my uncle had abused me while under my dad's "protection". I never mentioned it until a few years ago. My dad never knew. But also i had seen my dad being violent towards my mum. And cancer rising, i perceived well my mum's wounds. So i kind of took side.

Now i regret it cause i wasted time with my DAD.

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Posts: 1213
From: aspideronmars
Registered: Apr 2009

posted July 26, 2009 06:24 PM         

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Thanks Deux, i will do this visualisation

The thing is, i have moved on and i'm happy but my ex is determined to destroy my life. He is bitter and he is incredibly negative toward me and my youngest son to the point where he behaves in a mentally unstable way.

I have no bad feelings - i just want my kids to be happy and have a loving relationship with their parents. Unfortunately my ex is incapable of being an adult, responsible man.

Thank you

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posted July 26, 2009 06:24 PM         

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Hold on, when did your son last see his dad? Is there any reason to believe that there could have been some abuse of any kind? And what type of abuse are we talking about here?

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From: aspideronmars
Registered: Apr 2009

posted July 26, 2009 06:31 PM         

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I'm sorry Pire {{{{hugs}}}}}

Deux - over a month ago. He is terrified. Physically he cowers if his dad comes to the house

I asked him what the problem was and he said it was mainly shouting, screaming and always picking on him for things he gets wrong.
My ex is a big bully and control freak. He did it to me for 6 yrs until i finally left him.
He still does it now but the difference is i'm not scared of him now. I see him for who he is.

I don't want my son to grow up having no confidence and being scared of his dad. On the other hand, i don't want my son to not have a dad.

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From:
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posted July 26, 2009 06:39 PM         

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Im fine

im just one more screwed up, though not-so-often-screwed gay on this crazy earth.

Love to you lara.

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Posts: 1213
From: aspideronmars
Registered: Apr 2009

posted July 26, 2009 06:40 PM         

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Everyone is screwed up to some extent Pire. We can only play the cards we are dealt and the most important thing is to learn and try to have no regrets.

Love to you too Pire x

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From: No Permanent Address
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posted July 26, 2009 06:46 PM         

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quote:

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shouting, screaming and always picking on him for things he gets wrong.

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Ugh, ok I get it now. The visualization is still applicable, but you have to do more and also regularly. LOL. I wish your son could do it, too. I'm sure he's old enough to understand that what we fear becomes stronger the more we expect it. Maybe you should teach the affirmation to him as some sort of magic mantra. It's very useful for a lot of things anyways.

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Posts: 1213
From: aspideronmars
Registered: Apr 2009

posted July 26, 2009 07:01 PM         

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I will teach it to him
Thank you Deux

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