posted September 21, 2011 08:33 PM            

To be honest, I think that the best thing that you can do is:

In a calm and rational manner:

1. Admit where you are at fault (because you are also at fault somewhere in this). Do this FIRST so that he will be more open to listening to what you have to say after that. That doesn't mean you have to take full responsibility for the entire situation, but you do have 'own' your part of it.

2. This is very important: IN A CALM AND RATIONAL MANNER, concisely tell him where he is at fault (Do it in 3 sentences if at all possible; that's what I mean by concise. But avoid blaming/finger pointing). Focus on what actions he did, not on how he is a big stupid head (or some other version of name-calling ).

3.Tell him HOW HE CAN MAKE IT BETTER.

It always annoys the crap out of me, as an earth sign, when people don't tell me what they actually WANT ME TO DO. The water signs assume I can read their mind, the air signs assume that I already know, and the fire signs think that their body language should tell me what they want me to do. No. I'm not a mind reader, and I'm not going to waste my time figuring it out. TELL ME. I more than likely be fine with doing it if you tell me what you want. (Sorry, that was a side rant).

Now, it's important that you come off as calm and rational instead of super emotional, because Virgo types tend to think that you have not thought this through and that you are very emotional (whereas they have personally analyzed it ten times and have already come to conclusions based on that combined with the emotions they might have about it).

To be honest, if this person is more Virgo than not (though it looks like he's got a lot of other placements that will play a part), once he's made up his mind and decided that this situation isn't worth it... He will be GONE. Virgos just disappear when they really no longer want to deal with someone. They will literally never talk to you ever again (I've had other Virgos do this to me, so I know that I'm not the only one who does it). Me personally- I tend to only cut someone out like that when they have really really REALLY hurt me and they have shown that they are not a person of integrity (liars, cheaters, etc). Some Virgos will cut you out for less than that, it just depends... If he's still corresponding with you, there is likely a shot that you can work it out.

posted September 22, 2011 06:35 AM            

Virgos are really more sensitive than their reputation would suggest. They don't love easily. This is true of Venus in Virgo as well, especially since Venus rules relationships, so when I say "Virgo", I'm referring to Venus-in-Virgos as well. A Venus in Virgo person would be deeply hurt by an impulsive breakup. Virgos are very slow to give their hearts and to open up to others (normally, unless they have unusual influences that make them more open or impulsive). Most Virgos are quiet and subtle about showing affection; they aren't the type to shout love from the rooftops, but they are the type to be there for you when you need them. Thus, given that they invest a lot of trust and give a big chunk of their hearts when they finally do admit to loving someone or commit to them, the hurt that they experience is very deep and may put them off to love for a long time.

Let's also not forget that it *is* in the Virgo nature to be critical. I've known a lot of Virgos in my life and I've found that being balanced (something we Libras are good at) with their criticism can help. They often have a lot of care and concern behind their criticism (not always, but often). I would listen to what he is saying and see if you can maybe find that in there. However, on the other hand, with Virgos it's important to meet them halfway and NOT give into them completely. You have to stand up to them while still appreciating their concerns and criticisms. I don't think that it's fair for him to expect you to admit that you are all wrong and he is all right, but if you can see his side (while still not betraying yourself or letting him walk all over you), that might help. If he can see that you are really listening to what he is saying and that you can understand his feelings, that might make him feel more like you care. However, that said, he should also do the same for you. As a Libra, he's up to that task and is capable of it if he chooses to open his heart to that. If he refuses to see your side, then in all honesty I'd wonder if he was the right person for you.

That said, though, Virgos are often (not always, but often) even more critical of themselves than they are of others. They aren't as open about it always, but he is probably hurting too. His pride is a prison. Virgos are very hard on themselves, and it's at least possible that he does beat himself up at times, even if he doesn't express this out loud. It might seem like he always points the finger to others (and it could be true), but it could also be true that he does harbor some self-hate or is critical of himself too. You know him of course and I don't, but every Virgo that I've known has been like that, save one who is very highly evolved (but I'm sure that even she probably did this at one point).

I also think that it's important to note that Virgos and Sagittarians are 'square'. They aren't traditionally compatible together, and this goes for Venus signs as well as sun signs. That's not to say that they can't work--I've known a few happy Virgo-Sag couples (in all cases, woman Sag, man Virgo). However, it will take a lot of patience and understanding. Venus in Virgo vs. Venus in Sag love VERY differently and deal with relationships in opposite ways. Appreciating each other's perspective and finding middle ground is important.

To give you some home, remember that you have the same sun and your moons are very compatible, so you do have some good areas in your charts. Perhaps these placements can help you find a happy meeting point.

posted September 23, 2011 04:18 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Libreo:
I know I SHOULD get this with my proud Leo moon, but, if he is self critical and has some self blame, AND if he still loves me...(I feel he does) isn't this enough for him to move past things and work on something? When we blame ourselves for something, isn't the best thing to do say "I was wrong, I am sorry".

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Well, this is perhaps the best thing in some situations, but this is also the most difficult thing to do for manypeople. It's a LOT easier said than done. Some people get to that point much more quickly than others do. He might simply not be there yet at this point in his growth and evolution.

He may also need some more time to himself to sort things out. Some people need more time to recharge than others.