posted August 03, 2014 09:54 PM            

Or, well, this could just become a good Mercury-Saturn support thread, haha. Either way, do share your stories. I feel like amping up my math confidence is always a HUGE issue for me. When I get one math problem wrong, I call myself an idiot - and really believe it. Any little mistake I make, in math or otherwise, can make me believe I'm dumb! Sometimes, it's hard not to feel like I'm stupid despite how smart people say I am. Probably one of the most frustrating issues I deal with.

posted August 03, 2014 10:18 PM            

What's it doing?
House, aspects, etc.

posted August 03, 2014 10:30 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Barbiegirl19:
All of the time. I have the trine and it's in my 4th house. I'm always calling myself an idiot and get sort of emotional about it. I also have mercury conjunct my moon and mix up my words when I talk or write. I read backwards too. Even here I mix up my words and feel like I never make sense. I've been misunderstood my entire life, very few get me.

Really interesting topic

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Thanks Barbie! Glad you like it.

posted August 03, 2014 10:32 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by athenegoddess:
I think its because in past lives you were very smart and maybe misused that intelligence a lot. Depending on if Saturn/Mercury is badly aspected.

Now you are feeling what its like to feel what you are feeling. lol.

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posted August 03, 2014 10:34 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Gabby:
It's taken me a long time to stop myself from calling myself stupid!!
10th house Saturn exact trine 2nd/3rd house Mercury

I don't do it anymore but it's still a forced thing, being nice and supportive of myself, at times.
Like Barbie said, I also seem to read backwards think backwards and talk backwards.....I think faster than I can speak or write so I skip words and in my mind I think it seems like I'm a retard.
BUT I know I'm not.....I know we are not, we are just unique and original in our thinking.

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Hmmm....
I tell a story, about the story I'm about to tell.
How about that?

posted August 03, 2014 10:35 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by yellowelevator:
Hmmmm. I have Mercury opposite Saturn. I call myself stupid a lot from time to time, but the thing is I don't think I ever truly believe it in the moment. A lot of times I think I say it out of frustration but in a sarcastic manner. But I used to be super sensitive about my math capabilities when I was in school too, and I think it did make me feel dumb sometimes because I would look around at all my friends/acquaintances at that time and always be bewildered that everyone else seemed either decent or good at math and I sucked at it/felt insecure, but was always the one who was better at reading and writing.

I think this placement just makes me feel more insecure about my communication/the way I present myself. My Mercury is also conjunct my Chiron by 5 degrees so I think that adds to it. The description for this placement on cafeastrology.com fits me to a T, it even mentions the sarcasm lol. And a lot of the time I definitely do come across (mostly to family members) as sarcastic when I'm frustrated but they take it out of context usually and I'm not intending to be that way half as much as I sound. It's super annoying.

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Very interesting - thanks for sharing your story! It's funny, I can completely relate to what you are saying...because sometimes, I really believe I am dumb, like I originally posted, but then other times when I call myself names like that, it's more just a hollow kind of punishment - perhaps born from frustration, like you mentioned. I can't really explain it.

It seems like a running theme with Mercury-Saturn people is a difficulty with numbers/patterns/coding, but being good with heavy philosophy and intellectual writings. There is always an exception of course, but it's a running theme I've seen time and time again with people like us. Numbers frighten me. I mix them up easily, forget them, and panic during math exams more than half of the time. Words, to me, are solid. Language is solid. But numbers are too unpredictable and easy to mix up.

posted August 03, 2014 10:36 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by DeepFreeze:
You have Virgo moon??? If I remember.

What's it doing?
House, aspects, etc.

I have Virgo Mercury/Mars/Venus and Mercury/Mars square my moon. (Gemini) No one, not even Barbie can possibly understand just how hard I am on myself.

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posted August 03, 2014 10:39 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by sweet-scorpion:
Thanks Barbie! Glad you like it.

I'm sorry, though, that you've felt the same way as me. Mercury-Saturn aspects are very difficult, and I'm sorry you've had the trouble with Moon con. Mercury as well. I want to reassure you that I've always found your writing compassionate and highly intelligent. Don't worry.

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Its okay. You are in no way stupid or lack intelligence. You're extremely smart and very good at astrology. I'm sorry that you too had to deal with this. I remember being in school and always always second guessing myself, my original answer would be right and I always felt like the biggest idiot. Took me along time to learn to stop second guessing myself, I remember every teacher I had always telling me to trust myself.

posted August 03, 2014 10:39 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Gabby:
It's taken me a long time to stop myself from calling myself stupid!!
10th house Saturn exact trine 2nd/3rd house Mercury

I don't do it anymore but it's still a forced thing, being nice and supportive of myself, at times.
Like Barbie said, I also seem to read backwards think backwards and talk backwards.....I think faster than I can speak or write so I skip words and in my mind I think it seems like I'm a retard.
BUT I know I'm not.....I know we are not, we are just unique and original in our thinking.

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Thanks for sharing your story. Do you feel that your lack of intellectual confidence in the past hindered your career at all because of the 2nd/3rd house and 10th house placements?

I have Mercury in the 11th trine Saturn in the 3rd and I feel my friendships have suffered at times because I've been too in my head and overly complicated in my communications...and some people just find me too much of a 'buzz kill' when I want to talk about serious topics. I don't think having deep, intellectual conversation is a buzz kill, though. But some friends I've made have seemed to think so.

I have an overactive mind, or an underactive mind. One or the other. Mercury also squares my Mars. Sometimes, my brain goes too quickly for me to talk or write coherently. Appropriately, I feel I might be Bipolar 2...I'm getting more and more comfortable with admitting my problems openly since it helps me feel like they're less 'taboo' and 'weird' than they really are.

posted August 03, 2014 10:41 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Barbiegirl19:
Its okay. You are in no way stupid or lack intelligence. You're extremely smart and very good at astrology. I'm sorry that you too had to deal with this. I remember being in school and always always second guessing myself, my original answer would be right and I always felt like the biggest idiot. Took me along time to learn to stop second guessing myself, I remember every teacher I had always telling me to trust myself.

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posted August 03, 2014 10:41 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by sweet-scorpion:
Yes, excellent memory! It is conjunct Chiron, trine Neptune con. Uranus, sextile Venus and NN. I'm sorry you, too, have had issues with being self-critical.

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Chiron is the wound that never heals. So perhaps you feel stupid yourself but can help others not to feel stupid? Or something of that effect, if it is in fact related to your moon.
But then Barbie and Gabby are right there with you so... IDK.
I don't have that problem but I do struggle with believing in my capabilities to express myself in an understanding way. Just being able connect with others. I feel extremely awkward.
I'm VERY critical of myself with my physical self and... I guess desirableness.
Stupidity, nah.

posted August 03, 2014 10:55 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by sweet-scorpion:
Thanks Barbie, that really means a lot to me. I find that I am most hard on myself with math, honestly...it is crippling to me at times, especially with school. I could get A+'s in every subject but a B- or C+ in math would make me feel like a total failure. Second guessing seems to also be a running theme with Mercury-Saturn. Over-thinking it. That's what I was driving at. I've ALWAYS been told I over think things and it is definitely to my detriment!

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Awee you're sooo welcome

posted August 03, 2014 10:55 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by sweet-scorpion:
Very interesting - thanks for sharing your story! It's funny, I can completely relate to what you are saying...because sometimes, I really believe I am dumb, like I originally posted, but then other times when I call myself names like that, it's more just a hollow kind of punishment - perhaps born from frustration, like you mentioned. I can't really explain it.

It seems like a running theme with Mercury-Saturn people is a difficulty with numbers/patterns/coding, but being good with heavy philosophy and intellectual writings. There is always an exception of course, but it's a running theme I've seen time and time again with people like us. Numbers frighten me. I mix them up easily, forget them, and panic during math exams more than half of the time. Words, to me, are solid. Language is solid. But numbers are too unpredictable and easy to mix up.

Chiron to personal planets is always difficult and I empathize.

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I understand what you mean! That's a good way of putting it, a 'hollow kind of punishment'. I agree. No need to try to explain, I can't either, haha.

Isn't it funny how that works out? It's really interesting. Numbers frighten me too I think! But you're right, words are solid, they are there and they are a lot less confusing than numbers can be.

posted August 03, 2014 10:56 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by sweet-scorpion:
Hmm...interesting perspective. I'm not sure if I, personally, believe in past lives. I really go back and forth on this topic. I'm not 100% about the truth of past lives. Though, I am an old soul, so maybe. I have the trine between Mercury and Saturn, and Retrograde Saturn in the 3rd. I don't think that it's too bad of a configuration, it just makes me have low confidence and depression sometimes.

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Astrology would be obsolete if past lives weren't real, hence north and south nodes. Some souls are more advanced because they have been here more often than others. They are real, I have visions of mine. I'm an old soul too.

posted August 03, 2014 10:56 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by DeepFreeze:
Chiron is the wound that never heals. So perhaps you feel stupid yourself but can help others not to feel stupid? Or something of that effect, if it is in fact related to your moon.
But then Barbie and Gabby are right there with you so... IDK.
I don't have that problem but I do struggle with believing in my capabilities to express myself in an understanding way. Just being able connect with others. I feel extremely awkward.
I'm VERY critical of myself with my physical self and... I guess desirableness.
Stupidity, nah.

Very interesting topic though!! It'll be cool to narrow this down.

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posted August 03, 2014 10:59 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by DeepFreeze:
Hmmm....
I tell a story, about the story I'm about to tell.
How about that?

EDIT:
OR... I start on story A... go to story B, back to A, start on story C... back to A, then on to D. You follow me?

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Yes I do relate, I can't stand how my mind bounces around.
I've realized I absorb a lot of information very quickly....unless I think about it or try to remember it, then I get so lost in the process of trying to remember I miss what I'm supposed to be listening to.

I'm not sure if it's 3rd house Neptune, 12th house virgo Moon, Mercury conjunct Neptune or Saturn trine Merc?
Maybe it's all of them? It's hard for me to remember facts unless I have a foundation or a place to put that fact that allows it to connect to the rest of me.
But once I have a foundation, thoughts become fluid and I put things together very fast and I see much deeper into things than others do, I seem like an idiot savant, lol!!

It's taken me time to see I'm not stupid I'm just different....but so were most of the greatest minds on earth!
At least all of us that deal with this kind of stuff are in good company!!

posted August 03, 2014 10:59 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Barbiegirl19:
Awee you're sooo welcome

Yes I am too. I thought I'd hate Physics when I had to take it my last year and I actually loooved it and was one of the top students in my class. I always had really good grades just really hated math, it felt worse than pulling out teeth. I too have always been told I think WAAAY TOO much but I honestly can't help it it's who I am. I have days where I don't think as deeply and days that I think deeper than usual that's just the way my brain works

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I'm DREADING taking my core math classes. I'm actually a little better at science, though I still highly doubt myself in this area, too. I remember taking high school chemistry and almost breaking down into tears in front of my instructor during a tutoring session once [LOL, Cancer Mars crybaby here] but I actually ended up being one of the strongest students in my class, to my utter disbelief.

I feel like one of the big issues with this placement is feeling like every test, every problem given, is a 'make or break' moment - as if my whole academic future is hinging on one final exam in a math class. It's totally NOT true but it feels like it at the time!

posted August 03, 2014 11:00 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by yellowelevator:
I understand what you mean! That's a good way of putting it, a 'hollow kind of punishment'. I agree. No need to try to explain, I can't either, haha.

Isn't it funny how that works out? It's really interesting. Numbers frighten me too I think! But you're right, words are solid, they are there and they are a lot less confusing than numbers can be.

Aww, thank you so much! They really can be. <3

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I'm happy to know you can relate to my weirdly worded statement, LOL. I can't even quite explain how I feel, but that's the best way for me to put it. And I'm glad that you also feel the same way about numbers. Words stay put, while numbers are chaotic. It's simply the way they've always been to me. I don't understand the core foundation of the mathematical system no matter how hard I try. Also, I can't focus when I do math - my attention wanders and wanders. It's so bad!

posted August 03, 2014 11:02 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by athenegoddess:
Astrology would be obsolete if past lives weren't real, hence north and south nodes. Some souls are more advanced because they have been here more often than others. They are real, I have visions of mine. I'm an old soul too.

I have Saturn in the 3rd as well. Also growing up wasn't easy for me.

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I see what you mean. I'm glad you can relate to being an old soul. I've always wanted to tap into past life visions, etc... sometimes for my Mercury-Saturn influence mind, the proof is in the pudding, so to speak. So I've been skeptical since I can't 'tune into' what was going on in my past life. However, maybe this is just not my area of psychic/occult expertise.

posted August 03, 2014 11:06 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by sweet-scorpion:
I see what you mean. I'm glad you can relate to being an old soul. I've always wanted to tap into past life visions, etc... sometimes for my Mercury-Saturn influence mind, the proof is in the pudding, so to speak. So I've been skeptical since I can't 'tune into' what was going on in my past life. However, maybe this is just not my area of psychic/occult expertise.

Growing up was a nightmare for me too, to be honest. Many relatives died around me before age 18, driving gives me horrible anxiety [seems common with 3H Saturn], peers bullied me or made me feel isolated and I have no siblings. I'm sorry you also had a hard time. I'm trying to look ahead but I have some bad memories.

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Me too. Saturn in scorpio has made them all surface recently. Now im getting ready to go back home to talk to my family about it. I haven't spoke to them for years but now I have to because I know the only way healing can happen is by us talking about it.

posted August 03, 2014 11:12 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by sweet-scorpion:
Thanks for sharing your story. Do you feel that your lack of intellectual confidence in the past hindered your career at all because of the 2nd/3rd house and 10th house placements?

I have Mercury in the 11th trine Saturn in the 3rd and I feel my friendships have suffered at times because I've been too in my head and overly complicated in my communications...and some people just find me too much of a 'buzz kill' when I want to talk about serious topics. I don't think having deep, intellectual conversation is a buzz kill, though. But some friends I've made have seemed to think so.

I have an overactive mind, or an underactive mind. One or the other. Mercury also squares my Mars. Sometimes, my brain goes too quickly for me to talk or write coherently. Appropriately, I feel I might be Bipolar 2...I'm getting more and more comfortable with admitting my problems openly since it helps me feel like they're less 'taboo' and 'weird' than they really are.

It's good to have a positive perspective though, and consider what others see as faults to be unique, special parts of our personalities that we don't reject. Embracing ourselves is important.

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I agree embracing who you are is imperative! Yes it has affected my self esteem in my work. I'm expected to get up in front of ppl and whenever I was supposed to be the person who knows about things, I'd be terrified! I've gotten better, getting up in front of ppl n them praising me has helped so much.
I used to have so much fear of not being smart enough that even when I was "the teacher" I'd be very obviously shaky and my voice was quivering because I didn't feel I had the intelligence, know how or experience to be where I was...I'd be terrified that everyone would see I was stupid n they'd walk away thinking what an idiot why was she teaching us? I hate that I used to feel like that and yes it kept me from taking any kind of lead until I was absolutely forced.

I still struggle with it, even here on LL at times I'm reluctant to take on a roll of a teacher or admit I know something others might not...I feel like I should be very careful about acting like I know something that isn't something easily known or everyone knows...because maybe im not that smart. Even though I think I've found something new...I fear I could have misjudged it or my findings are all wrong. Lol