posted April 06, 2016 09:38 PM            

In laymen terms, you are trying to look at something that isn't there and this causes you to end up disillusioned because you divine how it's suppose to be vs how it actually is.

Now the counter

This is an invalid notion because of the commonalities found between charts of the subject and his or her close siblings and friends.

You can say that located in each persons chart there is a designated course and the sort of flow one chooses to go with in order to get to that courses

posted April 07, 2016 12:33 AM            

Just because romance at the beginning creates desire and a rush to know what's around the corner. But that not-knowing is part of the whole intoxication...drunk on dreams, usually. So we do want to know, but we don't want to know. Usually we want to strengthen the good part of the dream and delay the wake up calls, or we want to have a reason for not getting our hopes up. Basically we want the charts to tell us what we want to hear.

What's amazing and interesting is the surprises you find. Unusual connections appearing like riddles. Very dazzling sometimes if you have a mind for that. Just looking at things for what they are.

It's not just synastry, you have to look beyond and be willing to let the charts and events coalesce without resorting to conventional naming.

So you spark with someone? Why?

And oh, they aren't talking to you anymore? Why?

Now you're upset, but why?

All these things can be answered technically with actual numbers and geometric principles (aspects) and that can be comforting. Because it makes the connection look real (because it is) but also it's impersonal enough that you see how you don't have to blame yourself for everything going "wrong"...it's all right, actually. Everything is happening in its time.

posted April 07, 2016 12:39 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by PixieJane:
All I plan to say right now is that I'm glad I didn't look at the chart of my current partner. I figured we just had a fling and that it would fizzle out soon enough and thus didn't bother until later when I realized it was turning into something real. Had I done so sooner, I'd have fled from her because of her Scorpio Venus & Mars and Cancer moon, mostly because of what I read (having a stalker before with the Scorpio placements didn't help), which is similar to stuff on LL...even when it's meant to describe it in a good way, I tend to shudder and think "that's why restraining orders exist." I'd have overlooked one given other aspects of her chart, but all 3 together made me nervous. But it has worked out great, so I'm glad I'd gotten to know her as a person more than a chart and thus stuck it out.

(And while she doesn't stray too far from the description, they're fairly muted and also balanced by other placements, and she apparently was more obsessive and suffocating when she was younger but has outgrown that. Still, I do give more with those placements in mind than I have past partners, trying to find that middle ground we can both live with. And both of us know better than to think "it must be perfect or it's not real/worthwhile.")

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Does her having Scorpio Venus/Mars have an affect on how you perceive her now?

I'm usually really good at being able to tell what kind of synastry aspects I'm going to have with someone intuitively before looking at their chart.

Then there are classic examples of someone having less preferred chart placements for me and I find myself avoiding them out of paranoia.

posted April 07, 2016 12:40 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Faith:
I think we usually try to make the charts "spell out" our hopes and expectations.

Just because romance at the beginning creates desire and a rush to know what's around the corner. But that not-knowing is part of the whole intoxication...drunk on dreams, usually. So we do want to know, but we don't want to know. Usually we want to strengthen the good part of the dream and delay the wake up calls, or we want to have a reason for not getting our hopes up. Basically we want the charts to tell us what we want to hear.

What's amazing and interesting is the surprises you find. Unusual connections appearing like riddles. Very dazzling sometimes if you have a mind for that. Just looking at things for what they are.

It's not just synastry, you have to look beyond and be willing to let the charts and events coalesce without resorting to conventional naming.

So you spark with someone? Why?

And oh, they aren't talking to you anymore? Why?

Now you're upset, but why?

All these things can be answered technically with actual numbers and geometric principles (aspects) and that can be comforting. Because it makes the connection look real (because it is) but also it's impersonal enough that you see how you don't have to blame yourself for everything going "wrong"...it's all right, actually. Everything is happening in its time.

Yeah just rambling, gotta get some sleep

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posted April 07, 2016 09:20 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by UnderworldGlory:
Does her having Scorpio Venus/Mars have an affect on how you perceive her now?

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I think it's more accurate to say that she has affected how I see Scorpio Venus and Mars, Cancer moon.

posted April 07, 2016 09:34 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Faith:
I think we usually try to make the charts "spell out" our hopes and expectations.

Just because romance at the beginning creates desire and a rush to know what's around the corner. But that not-knowing is part of the whole intoxication...drunk on dreams, usually. So we do want to know, but we don't want to know. Usually we want to strengthen the good part of the dream and delay the wake up calls, or we want to have a reason for not getting our hopes up. Basically we want the charts to tell us what we want to hear.

What's amazing and interesting is the surprises you find. Unusual connections appearing like riddles. Very dazzling sometimes if you have a mind for that. Just looking at things for what they are.

It's not just synastry, you have to look beyond and be willing to let the charts and events coalesce without resorting to conventional naming.

So you spark with someone? Why?

And oh, they aren't talking to you anymore? Why?

Now you're upset, but why?

All these things can be answered technically with actual numbers and geometric principles (aspects) and that can be comforting. Because it makes the connection look real (because it is) but also it's impersonal enough that you see how you don't have to blame yourself for everything going "wrong"...it's all right, actually. Everything is happening in its time.

Yeah just rambling, gotta get some sleep

---

@Faith
Thanks for putting this in such nice words!

posted April 07, 2016 09:46 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Faith:
I think we usually try to make the charts "spell out" our hopes and expectations.

Just because romance at the beginning creates desire and a rush to know what's around the corner. But that not-knowing is part of the whole intoxication...drunk on dreams, usually. So we do want to know, but we don't want to know. Usually we want to strengthen the good part of the dream and delay the wake up calls, or we want to have a reason for not getting our hopes up. Basically we want the charts to tell us what we want to hear.

What's amazing and interesting is the surprises you find. Unusual connections appearing like riddles. Very dazzling sometimes if you have a mind for that. Just looking at things for what they are.

It's not just synastry, you have to look beyond and be willing to let the charts and events coalesce without resorting to conventional naming.

So you spark with someone? Why?

And oh, they aren't talking to you anymore? Why?

Now you're upset, but why?

All these things can be answered technically with actual numbers and geometric principles (aspects) and that can be comforting. Because it makes the connection look real (because it is) but also it's impersonal enough that you see how you don't have to blame yourself for everything going "wrong"...it's all right, actually. Everything is happening in its time.

Yeah just rambling, gotta get some sleep

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Not rambling, all of this is exactly the way I see it too!!!

"it's all right, actually. Everything is happening in its time."
Yesss! Thank you Faith for this amazing description!

Astrology is really amazing and is a way of finding meaning in...whatever you want.. Because there is one. This doesn't mean that the meaning that you'll find is the same you want it to be of course! Neither it means that he or she and us we are going to be together forever or be together in the first place! Apparently there is a danger of delusioning, but as in all things, it depends on the way you handle them and the same applies to astrology imo. Astrology is really a tool and it helps you evolve and grow, it gives you perspective and fascinates you with the beauty and wisdom in this world!

posted April 07, 2016 10:23 AM            

quote:

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Astrology is really a tool and it helps you evolve and grow, it gives you perspective and fascinates you with the beauty and wisdom in this world!

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Yes

It's as enlightening or as debilitating as we make it...but the deeper we get into it, I think it is conducive more to evolution than, say, clinging to charts for dear life, trying to eek assurances of relationship longevity from them.

We see there is more to life than relationships, there is more order and Higher Meaning than we thought. So it's okay.

Can't speak for everyone but I have derived immense comfort from seeing the Intelligence outfolding from time. It's a self-sustaining comfort that makes a person less prone to thinking they need someone else to be happy.

posted April 07, 2016 10:31 AM            

"It's as enlightening or as debilitating as we make it...but the deeper we get into it, I think it is conducive more to evolution than, say, clinging to charts for dear life, trying to eek assurances of relationship longevity from them."

Yes, exactly, even if the initial motive is to find an answer - a "why" - to a specific relationship/attraction, then as you learn more and more astrology-wise, you get to see the real meaning behind all things and be happy for life in its whole! Haha, I don't know if I expressed it well in english, but nevermind lol!

"there is more order and Higher Meaning than we thought. So it's okay."
Exactly again lol! Are you reading my mind??
I think in another thread I wrote almost the same thing, astrology as a tool for understanding the divine wisdom behind all things!

posted April 07, 2016 10:51 AM            

We are eerily attuned to each other.

MY GOD WHAT IS THE REASON?!!!

Wait...we already covered this. Your SN conjunct my sun, your sun conjunct my Saturn, draconic soul mate stuff....yeah. Check, check, and check. It's totally real.

@UnderworldGlory

posted April 07, 2016 11:02 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Faith:

We are eerily attuned to each other.

MY GOD WHAT IS THE REASON?!!!

Wait...we already covered this. Your SN conjunct my sun, your sun conjunct my Saturn, draconic soul mate stuff....yeah. Check, check, and check. It's totally real.

@UnderworldGlory

Sorry I forgot to thank you earlier. Thanks, glad if I made any sense.

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Hahahaha, yesss, isn't that unbelievable?
Look at that!! I found it lol

quote:

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Originally posted by mar1982delta:

That is simply amazing! Awww, astrology is such a beautiful form of divine wisdom to me!!!!!!!!

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How all these things are astrologically explained EVERY time? I mean I know better by now, they are explained, but this doesn't stop me from being enthusiastic about it and in awe, as you have already seen lol!!!

Since you mentioned draco, now that I finally started to understand them better, I think I really found my "true calling" in astrology, dracos!!! I will definitely research them more, I would be glad if you participated, too!!! Not here apparently lol

posted April 07, 2016 12:39 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by PixieJane:
I think it's more accurate to say that she has affected how I see Scorpio Venus and Mars, Cancer moon.

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I'm glad you had that experience instead of vice versa

I have a Cancer Venus and although Water Venus's are nice I don't really have much of a likeness to those placements much.

It depends on other things which can compensate for less than ideal placements.

posted April 07, 2016 12:41 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by UnderworldGlory:
Thank you all for your nice responses

I am still wondering if there are those who support the opposite notion and wonder if they have anything to contribute? Maybe due to certain chart placements?

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posted April 07, 2016 12:57 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by mar1982delta:

If you think astrology doesn't help you so much and delusions you in some way, then there is no reason to rely on others' opinion to verify that so to speak! I am meaning it in a good way! The most important thing is to be happy in your life! If astrology can't offer you that in any way, then just drop it and live!!!
Good luck!!!

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I like what you're saying.

Astrology is very special to me.

But this doesn't mean I won't trick myself in certain cases.

I'm sure everyone supports the "law of attraction" and believe that if you set your mind on a goal with clarity it will have a better likelihood of materializing.

I could give examples of this but it's obvious.

What if I *trick myself* into believing I have something with someone because of our synastry chart, like a Mars sq. Pluto, which is described as a "serial killer" aspect, when really there's nothing to it vs how I choose to see it because of that specific placement

And because I choose to dwell on it so much and the law of attraction says that any outcome you're most attracted to will be the most likely one to happen, I *accidentally* activate this placement in a real life situation

Does that count as disillusionment?

posted April 07, 2016 01:16 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by UnderworldGlory:
I like what you're saying.

Astrology is very special to me.

But this doesn't mean I won't trick myself in certain cases.

I'm sure everyone supports the "law of attraction" and believe that if you set your mind on a goal with clarity it will have a better likelihood of materializing.

I could give examples of this but it's obvious.

What if I *trick myself* into believing I have something with someone because of our synastry chart, like a Mars sq. Pluto, which is described as a "serial killer" aspect, when really there's nothing to it vs how I choose to see it because of that specific placement

And because I choose to dwell on it so much and the law of attraction says that any outcome you're most attracted to will be the most likely one to happen, I *accidentally* activate this placement in a real life situation

Does that count as disillusionment?

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Thanks!
I like what you are saying too!
You've got a point there and I understand. To me , this isn't delusion, but something else.
Hmmm, I am thinking on that scenario you proposed. But I think that we can be victims of our own "selffulfilling prophecies" so to speak, even if we aren't into astrology! I have thought about that many times in the past, even before starting to study astrology.. So maybe, if you (we) use astrology in the opposite way, it could help us avoid it?
I have some more thought for the specific synastry example you brought up in some minutes lol
*thinking mode*

posted April 07, 2016 01:23 PM            

The synastry and composite (and other astrodata) is very interesting and important.... but.... we are not always in such a calm and peaceful state of mind to interact with others purely on this level.

And as soon as we are hurt, upset, threatened... when something negative occurs - the attachment style kicks in.
For the half of the population who are secure in their style - this won't be a serious issue.
But for the insecure half, they could have the most amazing of synastries - and their relationship could still go downhill and become toxic (if they are not self-aware and working to become emotionally healthier)

For those unfamiliar with attachment theory, have a look at these links!

Background and History: http://www.simplypsychology.org/attachment.html

The different types and how this applies to romantic compatibility: http://the-love-compass.com
http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Attachment_in_adults

posted April 07, 2016 01:38 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Odette:
I believe we do fool ourselves to some extent. Because - emotional attachment style can have a very significant impact on the outcome of a relationship (and a person's style is not all that correletated to their chart)

The synastry and composite (and other astrodata) is very interesting and important.... but.... we are not always in such a calm and peaceful state of mind to interact with others purely on this level.

And as soon as we are hurt, upset, threatened... when something negative occurs - the attachment style kicks in.
For the half of the population who are secure in their style - this won't be a serious issue.
But for the insecure half, they could have the most amazing of synastries - and their relationship could still go downhill and become toxic (if they are not self-aware and working to become emotionally healthier)

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posted April 07, 2016 01:43 PM            

And as soon as we are hurt, upset, threatened... when something negative occurs - the attachment style kicks in.
For the half of the population who are secure in their style - this won't be a serious issue.
But for the insecure half, they could have the most amazing of synastries - and their relationship could still go downhill and become toxic (if they are not self-aware and working to become emotionally healthier) [quote]

posted April 07, 2016 01:45 PM            

quote:

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Can you elaborate on 'emotional attachment style"? Sounds like a phrase in a psyche class LOL

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posted April 07, 2016 01:57 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by UnderworldGlory:

I'm usually really good at being able to tell what kind of synastry aspects I'm going to have with someone intuitively before looking at their chart.

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posted April 07, 2016 02:00 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Sylven:
I almost wanted to start a thread about this. How you just feel on first meeting with someone certain synastry aspects. I feel Pluto and Jupiter, they just jump out for me. I had a student coming for advise today. The atmosphere was so jolly and light and humorous instantly! It felt so refreshing. We just clicked and I was excited to check his placements. I thought, being born at the the end of September, his Sun is conjunct my Uranus but when I checked his Jupiter is conjunct my Moon.
Maybe this is off topic but I think this is one of the most exciting if not THE most exciting thing in life; energy between people!! I just find it so fascinating!!!
I could clearly feel the jupitarian energy with other people as well. Always so nice!! I wouldn't want to do without Jupiter in synastry!

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Awesome response

posted March 28, 2017 08:57 AM            

Ever since I discovered astrology I've been looking up people's natal charts and synastry/composite and have used their charts to form intital thoughts/impressions about them. However, I've always maintained the possibility of 'maybe' and how signs/aspects manifest differently in different individuals, and the importance of really examining someone/their environment to try and see how their energy will present itself.

I am, nonetheless, in quite a predicament right now as I've totally developed feelings and a serious attachment to a guy who's a stranger to me still only because I checked our synastry and we have a near exact sun-venus conjunction, him being the venus. And being the astrology enthusiast that I am, I've really developed an understanding of this aspect as the venus peroson being completely enamored and in awe of the sun person. Now being a venus in virgo female and having that venus be heavily afflicted has contributed to my desire to have someone fall head over heels in love with me.. in a way that their love of me helps me eventually love myself (which I know isn't very healthy but..).
So now this guy who I barely know is my hope for self-validation and self-fulfillment. I want him to fall in love with me and be in awe of who I truly am :/

Still, I'm eternally grateful for astrology for bringing a great amount of insight and psychic ability even into my life. This is supported by the fact that I have cancer placements and an 8th house moon!

(Side note: it's also made me realize that certain ppl will never wish me well (purely because of who they are/not astrology-related) and that some will even stalk me years after we've lost contact:

My stalker who's probably reading this right now has moon square pluto and a cancer venus.