posted April 13, 2016 04:39 PM            

"I can't even imagine you being unkind. "
Lol, so many compliments, todayyyy Thanks!

posted April 13, 2016 04:39 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Vajra:
I think primarily it's unhappiness that can make people behave in a hostile manner. At least in every case I can think of, a deep and enduring sense of unhappiness seems to be the underlying cause, regardless of the astro signature.

It's telling that their usually hostile demeanour gets milder once in a blue moon when these peeps are doing a little better for a change, only for them to revert back to default mode (=hostile) when the lucky streek passes.

IME, people who are able to treat others with unfailing kindness, at ALL times, even when in severe bodily pain or grief or unhappiness or stress, are very rare indeed. Most will snap at some point.

Thus I really see hostile demeanour as an unconscious cry for help ("doesn't anyone notice how bad I'm doing?!") which unfortunately has the opposite effect, and drives people further away.

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posted April 13, 2016 04:53 PM            

Yes when I see people consistenly being against things, against this and against that, it's like I imagine them chafing against themselves inside.

@Mar

Oh you caught my sneaky secret meaning, that's good. Saturn is old father time so...with my Saturn on your sun, Time is on our side. (Good timing, that is!)

Yes I like my approach, I've gotten some good results, but also, curiosity did kill the cat, so in maintaining calm and insisting on my own kind of exchange, I've sometimes ended up befriending people I shouldn't have. Not that they took advantage of me, but that I thought befriending them was some kind of "progress" in my ability to charm and get along with anyone, and in fact, it was no progress at all. Glad to be done with that phase of my life.

posted April 13, 2016 04:55 PM            

LOL Oh not again!!!
I am emailing you asap!

posted April 13, 2016 06:03 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Faith:
Vajra's writing ability makes me jealous.

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Seriously!

In other news, I believe that my mom, while she has the capacity to come across as somewhat friendly, often communicates a general nervous anger and bitterness. She appears somewhat (sadly) unable to talk about anything without turning the conversation into a hateful rant about someone she has a gripe about (which includes most people).

She has Mercury in Cancer H8, square both Mars and Uranus from H11.

I suspect those aspects have a bit to do with her communication style, in addition to her childhood experiences, which were not happy.

posted April 13, 2016 06:36 PM            

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posted April 13, 2016 07:17 PM              

How about we call it,"Keeping MOST people at a distance.People may take things personal if they are attached to their actions and I had suggested they might reexamine some of those.

ETA: Wait a second, don't you have this??? [/B][/QUOTE]

Yes I do

posted April 13, 2016 08:28 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Violets:
Seriously!

In other news, I believe that my mom, while she has the capacity to come across as somewhat friendly, often communicates a general nervous anger and bitterness. She appears somewhat (sadly) unable to talk about anything without turning the conversation into a hateful rant about someone she has a gripe about (which includes most people).

She has Mercury in Cancer H8, square both Mars and Uranus from H11.

I suspect those aspects have a bit to do with her communication style, in addition to her childhood experiences, which were not happy.

She also has Pluto square her Scorpio Asc.

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This sounds like my mom, too. she has Moon in 22 deg Scorpio, in the 7th, opposite retrograde Saturn in 22 degree Taurus (in the 1st.) She also has Pluto in 26 Virgo conjunct retrograde Mercury in 24 Virgo, in the 6th, and Lilith conjunct Mars / South Node in 0-2 Virgo.

She also has Venus in 29.58 Libra conjunct her DC.

posted April 13, 2016 09:56 PM            

-Attracting unconsciously, or consciously 'bad' people into your life, and not knowing why you are attracting them.

posted April 13, 2016 11:17 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Vajra:
I think primarily it's unhappiness that can make people behave in a hostile manner. At least in every case I can think of, a deep and enduring sense of unhappiness seems to be the underlying cause, regardless of the astro signature.

It's telling that their usually hostile demeanour gets milder once in a blue moon when these peeps are doing a little better for a change, only for them to revert back to default mode (=hostile) when the lucky streek passes.

IME, people who are able to treat others with unfailing kindness, at ALL times, even when in severe bodily pain or grief or unhappiness or stress, are very rare indeed. Most will snap at some point. Conversely, I doubt that anyone who actually feels content and happy in their own skin would display a generally hostile attitude towards others, ever. Thus I really see hostile demeanour as an unconscious cry for help ("doesn't anyone notice how bad I'm doing?!") which unfortunately has the opposite effect, and drives people further away.

For instance, the several cholerics I've known through the years who would randomly start to yell at people all have some bodily illness that makes their life miserable on a daily basis (chronic back pain, stomach ulcers, insomnia, etc) while other "hostile" people had life circumstances to deal with that were either depressing or too demanding - the proverbial stressed-out single mom with two jobs and no child support etc. People who are in the wrong profession who hate their job, day in day out. People who are unhappy in their marriage, but unable to break free. And so on. It seems to be a combination of being in a bad place and feeling stuck.

Looking at it that way, I doubt astrology will be able to show a single pattern to account for a generally hostile attitude in a person.

*ETA* But I think astrology can show how a given person, if severely stressed, would most likely express their hostility - whether they would explode in anger or rather become cuttingly cold and sarcastic, for instance. I'd look to the Moon and Mars for that, combined with Mercury. And, stressful transits would point out periods where such behavior is likely to occur.

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posted April 14, 2016 01:35 AM            

What exacerbates my aggression? Mostly when I feel manipulated in any way. Customers who pretend this is the first time they're using a coupon (at the end of the day - who cares, but in the moment...) Co-workers of equal status who at bossy towards me. I guess just lack of honesty or "realness" will make me incredibly hostile and cold.

posted April 14, 2016 07:54 AM            

My mom has Mercury square Mars and Neptune in Libra, not Uranus.

posted April 14, 2016 07:59 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Selenite:
This sounds like my mom, too. she has Moon in 22 deg Scorpio, in the 7th, opposite retrograde Saturn in 22 degree Taurus (in the 1st.) She also has Pluto in 26 Virgo conjunct retrograde Mercury in 24 Virgo, in the 6th, and Lilith conjunct Mars / South Node in 0-2 Virgo.

She also has Venus in 29.58 Libra conjunct her DC.

I believe she has a lot of karma having to do with her expectation of others.. The martyr / projection thing is huge. She is sort of sweet and personable, but there is a real, reeal amount of hate and fury inside, triggered very easily -- especially if there is a plausible scapegoat. She hates emotions and used to yell at me when I cried, told me she would turn the vacuum on when I cried as a baby! (As if it was completely normal. I'm not even sure if this is as strange as I think it is, but I just felt really hollow when she told me that while laughing.)
I think the Saturn/Moon, Pluto/Mercury, and retrograde stuff is sort of key.

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Oh, wow.

posted April 14, 2016 09:35 AM            

Nice to see you around again. Thanks for your input.

@Seimei
"People may take things personal if they are attached to their actions and I had suggested they might reexamine some of those."

I like that phrase: attached to their actions.

@Violets & Selenite

Thanks for your replies. Yes it only makes sense that Pluto/Scorpio would be an issue. If someone is focused on the dark side of life, they may react to your dark side (or what they imagine to be your dark side) right away.

@KoreAbyss

I don't know Bill Burr but I see the squares you are talking about. He has Mercury square Chiron, too.

@Hanna

Thanks for your reply, I have known other Aries people like that. (Hence my OP). I respect it, even though sometimes I'm shocked.

posted April 16, 2016 01:23 PM            

I have managed to live most of my life, without a chip on my shoulder. I have one now, but not with everyone. I'm hostile when I'm being judged, whether I've done nothing wrong, or I'm being judged for having certain feelings, and when I'm exhausted - otherwise I'll be busy with something else.
But if I feel hostility from another person, and I'm in the wrong mood myself? It will show.

Unhappiness can play a part in it, but I can be unhappy and still be perfectly nice to people.

posted April 16, 2016 02:05 PM            

I have Mercury square Saturn natally, and will take things personally, but in the past, would rarely confront. I didn't need the hassle, and there were times when I wasn't sure if offense was intended, so I left it alone.

This morning, I was thinking of the time my brother-in-law caused a huge argument here, all because he thought I was avoiding him (after he'd hit on me). I was yelling a lot, to defend myself, my parents, and my sister to him, but at some point, he stopped yelling and looked at me, surprised, stating that I hadn't once hit below the belt. I could have, easily, but I didn't.

It bothers me at times, that anyone who meets me now, or has only met me over the past few years, might think that this is me, and always has been. It isn't - not even close. So I'm usually understanding when I encounter other people who aren't doing so well. And then there's my aunt, who thinks that anything upsetting me should just be water under the bridge, but she's still holding something about wedding photographs against my Uncle (who just lost his wife, yesterday), after twenty-six years.

posted April 17, 2016 08:19 AM            

This is just to add, or qualify - my previous answer.

It came off as an argument against the harsh Sun-Mars aspects, and well - that's not how I intended it. It's just that such things are hard for the native to handle, in any case. Some people close to me have those aspects - and it makes people not respect/appreciate them for who they are. All because of their sometimes alienating behaviour (hence the 'painful to watch'). It bothers me, 'coz he's actually an amazing person but most people hate him, since he's always rude/defensive, taking unintended slights as insults. Some people, on the other hand, have a better time handling this energy and fare better w.r.to 'going after' things.

I myself have a wide Sun-Mars conjunction (I guess a conjunction counts as a hard aspect acc to some astrologers). While it gives a better integration of energy than the square, it still can be pretty hostile/abrasive at times. For instance, if I intensely dislike someone, to the point of contempt - it's hard to disguise that. And they'll feel that hostile *vibe* even if I'm verbally polite to them.

Also, like what teasel says - it's like a shield of sorts that I use to push people away, if they get too close.

posted April 17, 2016 09:46 AM            

the person does not want to show anger in the most direct way (arian type for instance) as they may perceive they lose power. then, they resort of a controlled but smelly anger than transpire all their words..

it is always anger repressed and not fresh. dont know if I am making myself clear, but I cannot think of a typical mars in leo-aries or sagitarius without afliction from saturn-neptune-pluto or even uranus with such hostility... they will be more straightforward...

people may identify more with their light side (lets say you have planets in gemini, acuarious, sagitaruous) and you dont want or dont accept the less "evolved" martian side of you, then you may repress the fresh anger and then it becomes sort of contempt..

I am brainstorming here, but based on my observation as this is an area i have observed a lot because it fascinates me..

posted April 17, 2016 09:55 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by hannaramaa:
I often grapple with being hostile towards others.

What exacerbates my aggression? Mostly when I feel manipulated in any way. Customers who pretend this is the first time they're using a coupon (at the end of the day - who cares, but in the moment...) Co-workers of equal status who at bossy towards me. I guess just lack of honesty or "realness" will make me incredibly hostile and cold.

I have lots and lots of Mars in my chart, Moon opp. Pluto and Moon trine Saturn and Uranus. 11H stellium too.

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